Hello and salutations,
Are you tired of your friends, family, coworkers, or just strangers ranting and raving? Do you suffer from headaches, embarrassment and all manner of uncomfortably from the people who rant? Don't you just want to have silence and peace for once?
Well look no further with all new "Anti-Ranter" Taser! With this all in one stunner you will be having those ranters silent and quiet for the rest of the week! The Anti-Ranter taser allows for a quiet care free 'Shut the fuck up" environment. With the Anti-Ranter taser all you do is pop off the cap from the front of the metal stunners, and without any charging, wait for that person to start their normal "rant mode", quickly raise the taser to their neck, and press down on the button.
The 400,000 volt gun will send a carefully placed charge through the neck muscles into the mouth causing the muscles in the mouth to open and stiffen for 2 hours. Then as the mouth is opened, take the Anti-Ranter taser, gently place the stunners on the tongue and press down. The heavy jolt will paralyze the tongue for 168 hours! That is one week! Allowing you to be in an environment of peace and enlightenment. With the Anti-Ranter taser you will show those annoying, angry, ranting, whiners the definition of STFU!
The Anti Rant Taser is no ordinary taser, its highly placed, and calculated charge was invented by top scientists who feel like punching their colleagues in the face for not shutting the fuck up about the economy, politics, and sexism. If you act now you can get the Anti-Ranter Taser and battery pack for only 399.95$
The Anti-Ranter Taser is now available online at www.shutthefuckup.com! So don't wait, act now and show those ranters that your not playing!
Call 1 8 0 0 - STFU That's 1 8 0 0 - 7 7 3 7
Call now!
"Warning" The "Anti-Ranter Taser" may cause, uncontrollable urination and pooping, erectile dysfunction, memory loss, skin rash, total paralysis of tongue, and minor twitching. Do not use Anti Rant Taser on people who are pregnant or may become pregnant. Anti Rant Taser is a product of STFU INC.
STFU Inc. is not responsible for any injuries, or legal matters caused by the Anti-Ranter Taser. Use at your own discretion.