It was a couple hours before the engagement party. You started getting ready but you were interrupted by a text from Ian.
"Hey (Y/N), I'm coming home early. Can you pick me up at the airport in an hour?"
You were completely shocked. He was supposed to be in Australia for a month and instead he was coming home after two weeks. And on top of that he was landing in an hour. You felt like something was wrong, but you didn't know what. Perth to San Diego was apparently a 22 hour flight. What could have happened in the past 22 hours, you wondered. Was it possible that he just wanted to see you? Probably not, you thought. You replied back,
"Yea. Why are you coming home so early? Is everything ok?"
"Everything's fine. Just missed you. Plus the engagement party is tonight."
"Ok" You had no idea what else to say. You felt like saying "IM IN LOVE WITH YOU IAN!!!" but you didn't want to say it through text. It was finally time to woman up and say it, though. In an hour you will probably tell him that you love him, that is, unless you pussy out. You finished putting on some makeup and put on sweat pants, figuring that Ian would want to change as well.
As you drove to the airport, you practiced saying "I love you". You had never been more nervous in your life, but you had also never been more sure of anything in your life. You eventually parked your car and made your way to his gate. You turned around and there he was. It felt like you had butterflies in your stomach, but way better. You two crashed into each others lips and arms. You felt like saying it in between kisses, but you didn't. When you eventually broke the hug, you two walked out holding hands.
After you guys had gotten back to your apartment. He set down his things and you immediately jumped into his arms. He then carried you to the bedroom. You two made love, but had to cut it short. The party was at 6:00 and it was already 5:00. You two eventually got ready. You were wearing a lavender dress with nude heels, your hair was straightened and your makeup was a smokey eye with a light pink lip. Ian was wearing a maroon button up with black pants.
As Ian was driving to the party, you debated telling him that you loved him then. You ultimately decided to wait u too the perfect moment. You suddenly remembered that Chris would be there too. You didn't know what you were going to say to him. Maybe you wouldn't see him. It was pretty likely that you would though. You wanted to confront him about going to New York, but you thought it would be an inappropriate time to do so.
Once you finally got to the party, a wave of nervousness rushed over you. Summer and Jordan greeted you and Ian, and then left to go mingle with other guests. You went to get a drink to calm your nerves a little, but that's when you saw him. Chris was getting a drink as well. He looked nice, he was wearing a navy blue button up and black pants. He looked at you and smiled, you couldn't help but do the same. Ian was somewhere else talking to other guests. You figured that this was your best chance to ask him about New York.
"Hey, can we go outside for a minute?" You asked quietly.
"Yea, of course." He was still smiling.
The backyard was lit up with fairy lights in the trees and floating tea lights in the pool.
"So what's going on?" He asked.
You took a deep breath before saying, "Is it true that you went to New York for me two weeks after we broke up?"
He was caught off guard by the question but he answered, "Yea. I went but I realized it was a mistake and so I came back home."
"Why was it a mistake?"
"Well, I went to your apartment. I don't know if you were in there or not, but I just couldn't knock on the door. I felt like I would have been holding you back. You had always wanted to move away and I could never forgive myself if I pulled you back from following your dreams."
Tears swelled up in your eyes for some reason, you didn't know why. You found yourself getting closer to him until your lips eventually met. It was nothing sloppy or romantic, it was more of a goodbye kiss. If that made sense. After about 10 seconds, the kiss was interrupted by Ian. He came right up to Chris and punched him in the face. You were shocked that Ian's skinny arms could even do that. Chris was about the same height as Ian, but he defiantly had more muscle. Chris took the hit and just walked away. It was almost kind of noble.
"Ian what the fuck." You said.
"What do you mean, you were just making out with him. What the fuck were you doing?"
As people started I come outside, you said, "Let's not ruin the party, we can talk when we get home."
"Whatever." He said as he walked back inside.
You knew what you did was wrong, but it didn't feel wrong. It felt familiar and nice. It wasn't a romantic kiss and you didn't feel any sparks. You didn't know what to do. Ian was probably going to break up with you and you couldn't blame him. You had fucked up, maybe if it was with anyone else it would be ok but with Chris you just knew Ian would take it harder. You went to the bathroom and just looks fun the mirror. You shed a couple tears because you were so overwhelmed. You touched up your make up and went back to the party. Ian wasn't normally a drinker but you saw him with a drink in his hand. Chris was nowhere to be found, he probably just left. Luckily no one saw what had happened and the party went smoothly. After it was over, You and Ian stayed to help clean up. It was tense, awkward, and Summer knew something was up. She pulled you aside and asked you,
"Is everything ok? You two have been really quiet."
"I fucked up, Sum. Chris and I kissed and Ian saw. He punched Chris in the face and now he won't talk to me. I can't blame him."
"You did what? (Y/N), why would you do that?" She said. She sounded very angry.
"We were talking about New York and we just got caught up in the moment. It honestly meant nothing."
"Well did you tell Ian that?"
"No, I didn't want to ruin your party, I told him we'd talk about it later."
"Wow thanks for the consideration, wish you would have given Ian the same consideration before you kissed Chris!"
"Why are you so mad at me? You're my friend, you're supposed to be on my side."
"I can't be on your side when you decide to do stupid things."
The ride back to your apartment was silent. You wanted to say something but nothing you said would change how he felt. Once you and Ian went inside, he sat down on the couch and just kind of stared into space. You finally broke the ice by saying,
"Ian, please just say something. I know your mad so just let it out."
"I'm not mad. Im just disappointed."
"Ian, I love you. I'm completely in love with you. You're probably thinking I'm only saying this because your disappointed and I want you to feel better, but I really do mean it. I love you." It wasn't exactly the way you wanted to say it but it just came out.
"Look, (Y/N) I'm in love with you too. I just think you need sometime to figure out what you really want."
"What do you mean. I know what I want Ian, I want you."
"I'm just not so sure I believe that anymore."
"Ian, it was one kiss, it's not like I fucked him." You said, with nervous laughter.
"What if I hadn't have shown up? Would you guys have kept kissing? What would have happened?"
"I don't know."
"I just think we need a break." Those words completely broke your heart.
"Are you kidding?" You said as you were in denial.
"No." He said, dead serious.