jimin.
who are you?
remember me
why are you crying?
don't forget about me.
please, tell me who you are
please, i love you.
god, i'm dying to know who you are
remember who i am.
no! wait, don't go!
i love you.
no! please!
jimin's eyes fluttered open as he abruptly sat, beads of sweat tickling his forehead and rays of sunlight tickled his eyes. he felt his cheeks soaking wet and when his hands touched his face, he realized that he was crying, again. the boy soon felt something soft and silky in his arms. the boy's eyes trailed on the direction below him and the sight almost made him jump out of heart attack.
"sarah?!"
jimin jumped off from the bed and was certainly shocked of her-him, I mean them.
"what happened last night?!" he muttered as it was still visible that sarah was still in deep slumber.
jimin had tried recalling everything that happened last night but he can't still ponder how he and she ended up both naked, lying on the bed. what happened yesterday didn't got drinks involved and most certainly, jimin remembered walking on his way home.
what the f.ck happened? jimin asked to no one in particular yet seeking an answer as he face palmed, still utterly confused as the thought consumed his head.
as much as he shouldn't be, he felt disgusted of himself. unlike any other normal men who were supposed to be happy that something or nothing really happened in between them, the thought just terribly really bothered him.
the boy couldn't imagine himself touching sarah. true, he loves her but never in his life had he imagined doing those things with her. jimin wanted to keep her sacred just before marriage, he really never wanted to do it.
true, jimin's flirty, touchy and a caring boyfriend but he would always make sure that if ever things get way more heated than they are supposed to be, he tries to stop immediately. even at their make out sessions, he never felt really excited at all to the point that he would want to take her to bed and eat her and if something ever really happened between the two of them, he didn't know how he should act.
the sex thing made him feel wrong. it felt like he was doing a mistake. it felt like he was hurting someone, someone who seems he has yet to know.
he tried looking back on what happened last night. the boy couldn't really remember a thing, he knew he was already on his way home and then-
I was walking then... he pondered and for a while his eyes wasn't blinking up until he realized what really happened- his breathing became hitched and his eyes slowly widened in shock.
shit. shit shit! he continuously cursed inside his head.
everything suddenly turned black as I felt pain on the back of my head. he finally remembered.
But how did I end up in here? And why, how did it happen? Shit, was I drugged?
jimin was in a disarray, he couldn't quite imagine that his girlfriend could've drugged him and more so, was the one who plotted everything. he can't even deny the fact that he suspects her after all, they had an argument yesterday.
"jimin don't go!" sarah held jimin's hand to stop him as he was already on his way out of her flat.
"no! I think you need to be alone, sarah." the boy muttered his eyes not meeting his lover, his face was steaming red-hot not with embarrassment but because of anger.
"why won't you do it with me? we've been going out for many years! I... I need you baby," sarah purred as she teased jimin by slipping her other hand inside jimin's dress shirt.
"no!" jimin stopped her.
"why?! am I not good enough?" sarah screamed which made jimin look her in the eyes.
For a second, he felt guilty but dismissed the thought right away.
"you are! I just can't. don't you understand that I'm doing this for the both of us?!" jimin exclaimed, his voice raising also.
"I DON'T CARE! I want you in my bed right now!" sarah said throwing herself at Jimin.
"No! Stop it!" jimin struggled to push her away as she was already being desperate.
"I won't!"
"You're being absurd, sarah!" even if it would hurt her lover, with all his might he pushed her off of him ad she came stumbling down on the floor.
"I know it's bad of me to push you like that, but don't you understand my feelings? I said no, that means I won't do it! I came here all the way rushing to aid you because, I thought you were in some trouble but here I found you wearing only a lace underwear that isn't even fit for a clothing! I'm not like any other men who's thirsty on laying a hand on a girl, sarah! you out of all people should know that! I'm really disappointed at you right now, I thought you turning every parent meeting dinner was the worst but I think, I've been mistaken. . . cool your head, I'll be going home."
"You'll regret this, Jimin. I'll make sure you'll give in to me." Jimin heard her but decided to just let it slip.
jimin was in mixed emotions—he was sad, confused, troubled and most of all mad. he was mad at his girlfriend, he couldn't deny the fact that only she can do this. he remembered every little thing that happened yesterday and there was in no way it could be other people behind it. at that very moment, he wanted to end everything between them. He thought of ways how to do it up until his ears caught something.
immediately, his head snapped in sarah's direction and he was more than thankful that she was still not awake. jimin needed and wanted to escape this hell. As much as it seemed like he was being a coward, he decided to run away. he was so mad at everything, he never thought that such a thing could ever happen. the boy ran away from the scene and left sarah in her own flat.
the boy didn't care to know if something really happened or not, what was important for jimin was to escape the suffocating place. jimin was relieved of leaving the place and he is determined of never coming back to that hell again. jimin felt so dirty of his body and he wanted to burn them, even if it means hurting himself.
he ran and ran even if his legs were already hurting and he was already a couple of miles away. jimin was afraid that once he stopped, she would catch him and everything would go wrong once again. his legs gave up on him and soon he found himself knelt on the floor and alone, in front of the playground he used to play around when he was young together with his childhood friend.
the very childhood friend that her mother said was sarah but jimin begged to disagree.
move. . . move jimin, you need to run. your fucking legs need to fucking move. jimin cursed at himself as tears begged him to break free. the boy felt so bad, he felt conflicted and he didn't know who he should call to comfort him. He has a lot of friends, but he was afraid of them finding out.
he wants someone, just anyone.
soon enough, his tears succeeded in breaking the walls of his eyes and slowly, they started to fall. as the tears started to fall, jimin wasn't able to hold the pain inside and he let himself cry.
"why?" he asked, in no one in particular.
"help me" he muttered his eyes already clouded with tears.
"save me" he spoke again and once and for all he remembered that he had someone.
but he needed to get home first.
jimin gradually composed himself and slowly stood up. just as he was about to walk, his phone buzzed inside his pocket.
unknown number
seeing that the caller id was yet from another unknown number, he was terrified if it was Sarah once again. He hesitated on opening it but curiosity begged him and he did open it anyway.
read | delete
jimin heaved a sigh before he looked at the message.
unknown number: ohh um . . . hi there! it's me 🌞
jimin was still not convinced that it wasn't sarah but there was already a person inside his mind, just before he could compose a message in reply, another message was yet again received by his phone.
unknown number: sorry for being rude there! it's me, minnie 🐭
as much as jimin tried holding it in, tears started falling again.
"really, just the right timing."