Title: Exalted
Paring: Logan Howlett X Reader
Sequel: yes, to Elated
Warnings: fluff love, cuteness and angst
Spoilers: yes, to X-Men Origins: Wolverine
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A silence emptied itself into the room, breaking the tension in your chest into a mellow mess to clean later. While any other scientist in your position would be scrambling for medical tests, for all sorts of analysis, you were content learning at a snail pace. Because maybe, now you'd become steady with the Wolverine, Logan Howlett himself, you had fallen into some rapture further unexplored than the science of evolution. Something called love, if you dared name it that.
Logan did not name it that. After eight dates, and a sharing of a sofa bed in the Avengers facility (he preferred sleeping at your place, rather than at his place of work), you felt that there was supposed to be something shared that would suggest he cared more than what he let on. It broke your heart a little, but on the outside, all the Avengers and the media knew was that you were a very dedicated scientist, studying the subject close up. No romance involved.
The silence that surrounded your soul enveloped the room, enclosed your ears into a vacuum that made you feel woozy, dizzy, breaking apart one atom at a time. You lay beside Logan on the floor, staring at the sky through the glass roof of the greenhouse above the facility. It was your favourite place to be, surrounded by nature and the roses and the everlasting bloom of beauty. But the silence, it seeped into your bones and made brittle of your breath. There was something very wrong about it, and slowly, you turn to face your - whatever he was.
"What are we doing, Logan?" you whisper.
He frowns, and blinking, turns to face you. "What do you mean?"
Slowly, you move to sit up. Your mind is spinning with everything; your soon-due dissertation, the great unknown for the man you spend time with, and the fact that everything could break and dust the atmosphere if it burts -- what would the public eye think? What would Dr. Banner think-
"_________, what's wrong? Talk to me, darlin'." Logan's eyes look into yours, maybe even deeper, seeing the parts of you you hide from people, your soul. "_______..."
You can't gravitate toward his lips, not now. Not when they're so close. This could be his idea of friendship, not...love. You can't return his gaze either, and turn to inspect the vines that climb up the walls. "What are we doing, Logan?" you repeat, and adding quickly, "I'm never sure with you, you play with my head. Do - do you even like me? Most guys by now would be cheating with their girlfriends or going onto another level, but - but I don't feel like we are anywhere?" you confess.
Logan's eyes widen, and without notice, the wolverine feels a tear fall. He swallows.
"Say something, please," you whisper.
He clears his throat. "When Strucker put the metal in me, I lost my memories. But they come back, slowly, in pieces, and it kills me...when I can't make myself kiss you, hold you like a regular guy. I'm a freakin' mutant, this creature, and..." he takes a deep breath, and for a moment, you feel like the silence that had broken your soul had been slowly pressing down upon Logan as well. "I had a girlfriend once. I remembered her the day after I met you, and...I watched her die. And I didn't do a damn thing about it." he trembles.
You edge toward him, and all at once, you throw your arms around his solid shoulders, pulling him close enough to feel his heartbeat, feel his breath melt into the same pattern as yours. "I'm so sorry," you whisper.
Logan shakes his head, and kisses your cheek. "No, it's not your fault. I'm so damn in love with you, _______, every time I see you it's like the first time and there's butterflies. And I can't hurt you better than being in love with you."
Slowly, you release your arms, moving them to cradle Logan's face. "I'm a smart girl, Logan. I'm almost Dr. _______, and you're pretty much the best thing that's ever happened to me. If you leave me for any reason to protect me, I will follow you. I love you so much, so damn much, it's like I'm walking on moonlight, on thin air, and the high will never end. No when this makes me...exalted. Not when I'm in love. Not when I'm in love, with you."
Logan smirks. "Fancy words from a fancy girl," he grins, and moves toward your lips. "Kiss me, fancy girl."