06
abandonment
(A/N) Thank you so much for 200+ reads OH MY you guys are amazing!
I ran.
Unable to register how to react towards the sudden news, I bolted out of the library with Grayson running after me. However, after running straight for fifteen minutes, a feat my nerdy introverted self had never accomplished before, Grayson quickly realized that I was not going to speak to him and stopped chasing me.
I almost regretted my decisions when I saw his dejected appearance, his gray orbs swirling, clearly upset, as he whispered out a "Fae" before he walked back, his solemn shadow casting onto the snow crusted pavement as his shoes crinkled against the cold white blanket.
So I now sat on the public playground's swing, attempting to digest whatever information I had ingested.
My phone buzzed in my jacket as I took it out, slightly shivering as the sun begun to trickle down, welcoming the night in its daily ritual, the air becoming chillier.
Where are you? We're in the library but we can't find you. Grayson said that you ran, what happened?
Hazel texted me.
"We're distant cousins, very very distant cousins."
I recalled our conversation when I was still hospitalized, causing my blood to boil as a click went off in my head, my brain piecing together the information.
She knew, she was one of them. She was a werewolf, and she didn't tell me, her best friend.
Werewolves find their soul mates when they reach 16. Mates are a werewolf's counterpart and they have been paired specifically by their goddess, the moon goddess.
Recalling what I read in the library before I pulled a Houdini, I gasped aloud at the realization. Zachary and Hazel were mates; Zachary knew too.
My phone buzzed again as I let out a frustrated sigh.
Fae, where are you, you're making us very worried, is anything wrong?
Zachary texted.
I wanted to scream at him and tell him, yes, there was something wrong.
Wrong in the sense that my best friend never bothered to tell me what she was.
Wrong with the fact that the guy I thought as my older brother never told me what was wrong.
Wrong with the idea that the guy who I believed I was beginning to have a minuscule crush on was a fûcking werewolf that could rip me to shreds if angered.
Wrong with the entirety of how no one trusted me enough to tell me their identity.
I felt like a fool. Letting my walls come down as I told Hazel and Zachary what happened at home, letting my walls cave enough to allow my heart to beat exasperatedly quickly whenever Grayson was within sight's distance when no one even told me an inch about their lives.
I felt stupid. I entrusted my deepest and darkest secrets that threatened their way into my nightmares when they could not even tell me what they were. They never trusted me, they never opened up to me. It had always been a one-way friendship that I leeched onto desperately.
I felt utterly moronic.
I should have known, I was simply entertainment to them, I was a mere object to pass time. I should have learned my lesson, why did I trust so easily when the people I loved always broke the faith I held in them? My father should have been the clear indicator that no one could be trusted, but yet, here I was, feeling betrayal seep through my veins has my hand curled into a dangerous ball sized fist.
I let out a scream. I poured all of my anger in it, yelling out my frustrations, how I felt betrayed.
It was at that moment when I heard the familiar car screech to a stop as a figure ran so quickly, almost flying as I was wrapped in a hug.
I pushed the figure back.
Hurt flashed in Hazel's eyes as Zachary who ran behind her looked at me, nonplus.
"How did you come here so quickly?" I questioned, venom lacing my words as they both stared agape at me at my aggressive behavior. I was never like this.
"Oh yeah, you probably sniffed me out, or heard my heart beat." I spat before any of them could respond, realization ringing off loudly their brains as their eyes widened.
"You're werewolves." I rattled off, tears threatening to fall as I stared at them dead in the eye, my expression emotionless and my defense high.
I was not going to be tricked again.
"I feel like an idiot." I laughed out bitterly.
"No one trusted me enough to tell me," I whispered lowly.
"Fae," Hazel started, eyes alarmed as tears flew freely down her cheeks as she made her way towards me.
"Don't come near me," I responded, bitter, as Hazel quickly paused in her tracks as she stared agape at me.
Seeing that no one moved, I ran, for the second time today, my heart pounding like drums in an ensemble as I tried to escape the orchestra known as life that was continuously playing a torturous reality over and over again.
---
It was my fourth cup of vodka.
I grimaced as the now familiar burn trickled down my throat.
I was not legal - that I was aware. However, I figured with being 21 in a few weeks and already having a fake ID to manage the house's finances, I could barrel my way into the bar; which I did.
I motioned for the bartender to hand me another cup as the glass of clear liquid was passed my way. Downing the liquid, I was greeted once again with a flame that scratched my esophagus as my rationale diminished per shot.
"Are you alright?" A male who sat next to me questioned, my somewhat alcohol filled self still able to distinguish the genuine concern that laced within his eyes.
"I wouldn't be drowning myself in alcohol if I was alright." I retorted, scoffing slightly at whatever happened earlier in the evening. Noticing my spiteful response, he chuckled aloud, before composing himself as a small smile plastered on his face.
"Cole." He introduced himself.
Nodding in acknowledgment, I returned the introductions rancorously, "Fae."
Flinching at my response, Cole adjusted his chair so that he was seated directly in front of me.
I breathed out a solemn sigh.
"I'm sorry, I must have sounded like a bítch, I just had... a rough day." I summarized as I gently pushed the cup away from me.
He showed sympathy, and understanding, as he slowly consumed the cup of martini that was served to him.
"Care to share?"
"I'm sorry, it's... a private problem," I responded softly, shaking my head to make my point, throwing him an apologetic smile. While still slightly frustrated and near one hundred percent drunk, I still refused to divulge any information that could have possibly brought harm to the three people I was most angered with.
I was such a softie.
Sighing at my mental confession, I leaned back, hands gripping the bar stool as my palms supported my drunk stupor, attempting to settle down and bring back my sober self- although that seemed near impossible to do so now. Cole gave a hearty laugh, appearing eminently amused at my answer as he beamed at me, fully displaying his pearly whites.
Flummoxed at his reaction, I tilted my head questioningly, which resulted in his chortle, gaining the curiosity of people nearby.
"Stop! This isn't funny!" I whispered harshly, his eyes lighting up in pure glee as he seemed to bask in my ultimate discomfort.
"My apologies, you're just so much like our Alpha-in-waiting, I had to laugh." He breathed out, engendering the hitch in my breath, oxygen rapidly sealing itself back into my lungs as I cautiously stepped back in recognition. Before I could hightail to the exit, he instinctively grabbed me by the wrist, causing me to visibly pale in trepidation. With his mouth forming an 'O', Cole immediately released the vice grip he had on my wrist as he rubbed the nape of his neck, muttering inaudibly to himself.
Looking around frantically, my line of vision grew increasingly blur and frantic. I searched for any possible exits, only to find packs of people blocking the exits, blocking all possible means of escape.
Heaving a penitent sigh, Cole awkwardly bowed ninety degrees towards my direction, clearly expressing his clear feelings of remorse and guilt. Seeing the sudden hundred eighty degrees switch from his earlier confident demeanor gave me an inkling that Cole truly was not used to apologizing so feverishly. With pink tinting my cheeks in response, I grabbed the sides of his arms, urgently requesting that he raise his head as I gave him an expectant glance which caused him to exhale.
"I'm Cole Dexton, the Gamma of the pack native here." Cole reintroduced himself, clarifying his position in this growingly messed up family tree.
Gamma, the official third-in-command in a werewolf pack. They are often given the important task of maintaining order within the pack and giving advice to the Beta and Alpha. Usually, given the role of providing military leadership, they are commonly tasked to protect their Luna.
I recalled this piece of information from one of the books I read before I ran out of the library. How I managed to recall an entire paragraph from my scatter-brained memory was unbeknownst to my knowledge as I shivered involuntarily at Cole's proclamation.
"So," I drawled out, uncomfortable, as I threw him a question that lingered unabatedly in my head. "Why is a Gamma out here talking to a human, shouldn't you be protecting your Luna?" I quizzed genuinely, as Cole guffawed in response. Clearly regaled at how I knew so much about werewolves, he nodded to himself, a frequent habit of his that I noted.
"Me," he pointed sarcastically to himself, a smug grin on his face as he continued, "Gamma."
"You," as his finger went towards my direction, it strain of dread dove down in front of me as it finally dawned on me what was happening, or at least what I believe was going to happen, "Luna."
I was now fully sober.
"No." I deadpanned, unamused by this conclusion as I crossed my arms in absolute disbelief, glaring knives into Cole's path of vision as he broke out into a lazy grin.
"Yes." He mocked back with satire, as I groaned in response.
"Moon goddess?" I reaffirmed the cause of my sealing fate as Cole's pearly whites reappeared, a Cheshire smile gracing his features as he nodded, almost like a toddler.
"Tell me my mates' full name so that I can reject him." I bluntly stated, serious, as the grin on Cole's face quickly fell, only to be replaced with a worried quiver.
"Why does a human know so much about the rejection process?" He demanded, embittered, as I showed him my phone, which contained a photograph of my witch circle of werewolf books in the library earlier, causing a grimace to appear on his already contorted features.
"I knew we shouldn't have put the historical archives there." He murmured aloud, moderately vexed as he repeatedly shook his head in refusal to reveal my mates' name.
"Tell me."
"You can't order me, you aren't my Luna yet." A triumphant grin carved on his cheeks as he puffed his chest out proudly, aplomb exuding over his awareness on his current advantage.
"You suck that chest back in or I promise that you will continue sleeping with one eye open for the rest of your life." I declared threateningly as all cockiness present in Cole evaporated.
"Why are you so bent on rejecting your mate? You don't even know who he is." He mentioned, clearly exasperated as he gestured at the air.
"I have been reminded countless of times that love never works out," I muttered out softly, knowing that even despite the horrendously loud club music, his werewolf senses would have allowed him to hear my statement; thankfully, he did not press on to it as he became silent.
"Well, I suggest that you give this love a try." Cole propounded as he stared at me with hopeful eyes, slight concern glistening in his eyes like stars that illuminated the sky at night- I looked away. Glancing and dividing my attention between the dance floor that thronged with drunkards and the tense situation being crafted at the bar, I let out a reluctant sigh.
"I'm tired, I'll think about it," and with that, I quickly paced myself out of the bar, a pang of guilt mixed pain resounding in my heart as I left Cole behind in the bar, refusing to look back and see the surely broken features that painted his face.
---
(A/N) Don't be angry ahhh. I feel like everyone hates Fae now, oops. So, I was attempting to build up Fae's character as someone with commitment and trust issues. I mean, you guys know why she has these issues, so there is no point dwelling too much into depth about it, but I just wanted to mention it in case you were wondering.
How did you find Cole? I based him off a really close friend of mine aha.
Please vote if you enjoyed reading, it honestly gives me a lot of motivation to continue writing.
Thank you so much <3
- Ella