It's been a little over a week since the battle at Hoth. My stitches are looking a lot better, but I would still have a nasty scar. Orusa had been quite upset when she learned what happened, and instantly started working on a new dress for me to wear, even though I told her she didn't have to. It took her less than three days to finish it, and it was beautiful, even more so than my old one. It was a dark black, just as short as the other one with the same style. However, it had a deep v neck, exposing a bit of my cleavage. It made me feel amazing, and yet somewhat self conscious. "You look gorgeous!" She told me when I put it on, smiling as she examined her fine handy work. I thanked her and left, then headed to go train with Kylo. He's been so stiff and uptight recently, and I had no idea why. But thankfully, he had been working with me to get my strength back up to my usual self.
After entering the room, Kylo and I started our routine as we normally did. I still didn't have a new lightsaber, but I could practice Force bending. About half an hour passed, and I noticed Kylo kept looking off into the distance, distracted. I shrugged it off at first, but when he narrowly missed me throwing a chair at him with the Force, I had to intervene. "Kylo!" I called, looking at him incredulously. "What?" He asked, breaking out of his revere. "Alright...come on, spill. What's going on with you?" I questioned, crossing my arms. Kylo took a deep breath before meeting my gaze evenly. "Why did you save me on Hoth? You could've let me die. You would've been free from all of this. Free from me." He asked cautiously. His question took me off guard. "You're my master and...my friend. I couldn't just let you die..." I replied quietly, refusing to meet his eyes. I felt a pin-prick in my mind, instantly knowing that he was probing for clues to further explain my actions.
My heartbeat accelerated as I pushed my feelings for him to the back of my mind, trying to hide them away in the deepest recesses of my brain. The internal fight did not go unnoticed by Kylo, and the moment I looked up at his face, I knew that he had felt my emotions. His eyes widened as his gaze met my own. "Andromeda? Is that truly how you feel?" He asked lowly. I swallowed hard, knowing it would be no use to lie to him, not after what he had just felt. "I...yes Kylo." I replied weakly, both relieved that he knew the truth and totally scared about what would happen now.
We had developed a bond, a frustrating friendship of sorts, but still a friendship nonetheless and I didn't want to ruin that in any way. Kylo stared at me for a minute, not saying anything, just watching me with a surprised expression. Sighing, I looked away. "I know. I'm a stupid little girl...just forget about it Kylo..." I said softly, beginning to turn to walk away. Long fingers wrapped firmly around my wrist, causing me to stop in my tracks. "Wait..." Kylo commanded softly, making me turn around to look at him. My face was red with embarrassment, and all I wanted was to leave the room as fast as I could. A large warm hand cupped my cheek, and Kylo's face was suddenly in front of my own. His chocolate eyes held something that resembled innocence and uncertainty. My chin was tilted up just slightly, and I stood frozen in surprise at the somewhat comforting gesture coming from the man in front of me.
Without a word, he closed his eyes, and his lips crashed down on my own. My own eyes widened in shock. Kylo Ren was actually kissing me and it was so wrong, yet so wonderfully perfect. After a moment, I finally came to my senses, wrapping my arms around his neck and closing my eyes as I kissed him back, feeling as though the moment would slip through my fingers if I did nothing about it. Who knew how long this could last? It could be temporary, mean nothing to him, just a way to shut me up. The thought of that broke my heart, but I had to ignore it.
A deep voice echoed within my thoughts. Relax... I blushed darker, realizing that he had been listening to my thoughts and doubts. I allowed my muscles to relax, my breathing to slow, and finally gave into his touch fully. I felt him smirk into the kiss, the hand that wasn't pressed against my cheek sliding down my spine to hold onto my waist tightly, like he was secretly afraid of letting me go. My hand tentatively reached up, fingers tangling in his beautiful ebony locks. His lips were warm and firm and full against mine, but surprisingly the kiss was not rough, and he tasted of something I could not place. Something oh so alluring. I shivered at that thought, knowing that if anyone ever compared me to Eve from the Bible, Kylo was the forbidden fruit I so desperately yearned for. Even though it wasn't my first kiss, it was definitely the best. He pulled me closer to his body, pressing us together in a way that practically screamed his desire for love and redemption. For the light.
Unfortunately, neither of us are exempt from basic human needs, and we not so willingly pulled away from each other to breath normally. My eyes fluttered open only to meet a set of brown ones staring back curiously. Silence filled the air around us, and I nervously awaited his next move. "Be mine. Show me a way back to the light. Please..." He whispered solemnly. My heart filled with a newfound hope. "Of course I will, Kylo." I replied. I could feel his body relax against my own, the caution slipping away. He seemed amazed, like he never expected me to say yes. Like he thought I would push him away. When in fact, I was doing just the opposite.
He simply continued to stare at me, looking dumbfounded, and a small smile broke across my face. I couldn't help it. "What?" He asked, the unease slipping back into his aura. I shook my head, draping my other arm around his neck gently. "Nothing. I'm just happy." I confessed. "Happy?" He repeated. I nodded in response to his question. "Why?" He asked quizzically. I thought about it for a moment. Why am I happy? I should hate this man. I shouldn't have let him kiss me. I shouldn't have fallen for him at all. But I have, and I can't help it. I can't fight it anymore. "Well...I just... I thought you didn't really care for me. That everything I felt was one sided. I guess I'm just relieved." I admitted quietly. He tilted his head in confusion, as if he was having trouble comprehending my words. Like he never expected to feel endearment from another person. "You were relieved that I feel affection for you?" I nodded again, and this time he actually smiled at my answer. "So am I." He admitted.
Grinning despite myself, I stood on my tip toes, softly pulling him down to my level. "I'm glad." I whispered in his ear, before leaning back just enough to stare into his eyes for a moment longer. Then I surprised even myself by pressing my lips to his again. He responded eagerly to my touch, tightening his semi-loose grip on my waist. I felt his hand come up to hold my cheek, fingers gentle against my skin. My own hands were unable to settle on any one place, moving from his neck to his hair, and back down to his shoulders. For once, I felt happiness coming from him, pleasure. Who knew the great and powerful Kylo Ren would enjoy kissing so much? I chuckled, knowing that we had crossed a very delicate line, and everything would be different from this moment on.
Third Person POV
Training with his apprentice was becoming increasingly difficult for Kylo Ren. She was so strong, glowing with perseverance and power. Ever since he had spoken with the ghost of his grandfather, Kylo had been severely torn between the light and dark. He couldn't think straight, especially when he was around the young woman. It was as if something had been awoken deep within Kylo. Like the connection between the two Force-sensitives had grown more intense, stronger.
Of course, the new outfit she was wearing wasn't helping. He had always found Andromeda attractive, if nothing else, even before he felt such adoration for her. But the new dress that Orusa had designed for her accentuated her features even more. It showed off her long legs and amazing curves, and enhanced her blue eyes, the dark colored fabric contrasting so beautifully with the pale orbs.
As it was, he had already zoned out numerous times during this session alone. To his embarrassment, Kylo soon found out that Andromeda had noticed his mental absence. "Kylo!" She rose her voice, capturing his attention. "What?" He asked, meeting her gaze evenly. "Alright...come on, spill. What's going on with you?" She interrogated with the utmost curiosity. Kylo breathed deeply. There was one other thing that had been nagging on his mind since the battle at Hoth. Something that had been weighing heavily on his shoulders. Seeing the deep concern in Andromeda's eyes, he decided to ask it. "Why did you save me on Hoth? You could've let me die. You would've been free from all of this. Free from me." He explained, awaiting her reply. "You're my master...and my friend...I couldn't just let you die...." Andromeda answered his inquiry, yet there seemed to be something she was holding back. Like she wanted to say it, but was refusing to.
So Kylo did something he hadn't done in a few days. He started to probe her mind, searching for any other explanation for her actions during the battle. He expected some sort of plot she had devised to escape again, or something of that nature at least. Instead, he felt something odd. Feelings of affection, attraction, and even admiration at times. They were strong, but he could tell she repressed the emotions, hoping he wouldn't see them. Amazed, he withdrew, reminded about what his grandfather's ghost had told him. How Anakin knew about Andromeda's emotions when Kylo didn't was beyond him. He never thought it was possible for his apprentice to feel the way she seemed to, nor that he could admire and care for her the way he did. He was blown away from the realizations.
His eyes widened and he met her hesitant gaze. "Andromeda? Is that truly how you feel?" He asked wearily. He found himself hoping she would say yes. That she would admit it, because then he wouldn't feel like an overly excited fool. "I...yes Kylo." She said softly, her unease visible just in the way she was holding herself. Kylo could sense her fear, and he realized that he never wanted her to feel that around him ever again. He wanted to keep his apprentice safe, to protect her from any harm or trouble that might befall her. Not just because she was powerful, but because he had developed feelings for her, and he couldn't control them anymore.
In that moment, he could've cared less about how wrong his feelings for her were, considering that Snoke constantly drilled into his mind that he should never feel anything positive, certainly not love and empathy. Andromeda's frightened gaze fell, her thick lashes dropping so that he couldn't see her eyes. He felt her shame pouring into him. She had been caught, and she knew there was no going back. "I know. I'm a stupid little girl...just forget about it Kylo..." She whispered, starting to turn away from him. But Kylo didn't want her to leave.
Something was taking over him. He needed her to stay. He reached forward and firmly wrapped his fingers around her wrist, stopping her movements. "Wait..." Kylo commanded quietly. He reached up, cupping her cool, soft cheek. He slowly leaned down, face inching toward Andromeda's. His thumb tilted her chin up a little bit, making it easy for him to stare directly at her and keeping her from looking away. He didn't really know what he was doing, but he knew what he wanted.
Cautiously, he leaned down the rest of the way, closing his eyes as he connected their lips. Some unseen force was guiding his actions, and he suddenly found himself waiting to feel her respond to his touch. He nearly pulled away in fear of crossing a deadly line. He was both taken aback and relieved when she got over her shock and pressed back against him, her lips moving along his experimentally. He felt her arms drape around his neck, and he marveled at the feel of her delicious lips. They were so soft and smooth, just like silk, and pliant against his own. He only hoped he was doing everything right. This was something totally new and exciting to him.
There were very few female Jedi padawan that he knew when he was younger, and had never courted anyone, as relationships were forbidden for both the Sith and Jedi. Therefore, this was his first kiss, though he'd never admit it. He couldn't form coherent words even if he had wanted to. But a nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach made him slow just slightly, thoughts of uncertainty and sadness sweeping through him in an instant. It was just then that he finally heard Andromeda's thoughts, feeling her conflicted emotions. He saw that she felt inadequate, insecure, and unsure about his actions, even though she was enjoying them just as much as he was. There was tension along her spine and shoulders that he felt as he wrapped his arms around her small body. Relax... He thought, knowing she would hear him. He wanted her to feel what he was feeling, every bit of it. To stop worrying so much. That was his job. Every muscle slowly released, easing the taut lines gathering in certain spots on her body as she stood still.
She did as instructed, practically melting into him. His hands gripped her waist gently, carefully avoiding the lightsaber wound, feeling her petite fingers running through his dark, shaggy hair. Kylo focused more on the kiss. They still hadn't broke for air. Andromeda's lips were so sweet and delicate, like rose petals against snow.
Inexperienced, he kept his touch as light and yet as bold as he could, not entirely sure about what her overall reaction would be. He was waiting for her to pull away any moment in terror or anger, shattering his already fragile ego with the razor's edge of a sword. But surprisingly, it wasn't until they had run out of air that they both pulled away.
Kylo was the first to open his eyes, unable to stop staring at her once he started. Andromeda's eyes were wide in surprise when she opened them, and she didn't utter a sound. Tension filled the air, and Kylo was the first to break the silence that had settled between them. He had been thinking about what Anakin's ghost had told him, about what the Dark side would inevitably do not only to him, but Andromeda as well.
In that moment, he knew he had to make a decision, no matter how difficult it appeared. Did he still want to follow Snoke, or did he want to be with Andromeda? Even Kylo knew there was absolutely no way for him to have both. For once in his life, he was being forced to decide what he wanted, not what would benefit other people. Thinking for a moment more, he made his choice. "Be mine. Show me a way back to the light. Please..." He pleaded quietly, exposing true weakness for the first time in a very, very long while. "Of course I will, Kylo." She replied without hesitation. Kylo was beyond amazed by her answer. He was sure that she would tell him no. There were no words, nothing to express how he felt, because he wasn't entirely sure exactly what he was feeling. Andromeda didn't say anything either, just smiled happily at him. God how he loved when she smiled. The way her eyes shined in mischief and purity, "What?" He inquired cautiously. She shook her head and wrapped her arms around him again. "Nothing. I'm just happy." "Happy?" He repeated. She nodded in affirmative. "Why?" He wondered. Andromeda paused. "Well...I just... I thought you didn't really care for me. That everything I felt was one sided. I guess I'm just relieved." She admitted."You were relieved that I feel affection for you?" He asked, feeling a bit of confusion. He still couldn't comprehend what the woman in front of him was telling him.
Seeing her nod again, he couldn't help the smile that crossed his face. "So am I." He admitted. Andromeda's smile widened, and this time she stood on her toes, leaning up into Kylo as she softly pulled him down to her. "I'm glad." She whispered in his ear, her warm breath fanning across his skin and making him shiver. Then she leaned back and looked into his eyes. Her pale blue ones were beautiful and kind, captivating him.
Then she tilted her head, leaning forward to press her lips against his again. He eagerly responded to her, tightening his arms around her body. One of his hands came up to cup her cheek, holding her to him. He could feel her running her hands up his neck and back down his shoulders. He was unbelievably content in that position. His apprentice, Andromeda Kalane, was a drug that he could not pull himself away from. There was no rehabilitation to aid his struggle. She was addicting and impossible to ignore. God knows Kylo tried, ever since he met her he had kept his distance. As they grew closer, he pushed her away. But nothing worked, and he finally caved, all inhibitions gone. He wanted her, but more importantly, he needed her. As a companion, a friend, a lover...everything imaginable.