Hope you a enjoy. Please leave comments and votes for me(: .
Louis jolts up from the chair quick and rushes over to her, cupping the sides of her face, being conscientious to not hurt her. "What happened?"
The question brings on a new wave of tears, and she simply lets them fall. Lets them run down her face, and Louis carefully starts to wipe them away. "It was - It was just a scare," she mutters out, voice thick and wet. Louis' heart sink some more, especially when an ugly sob belts out from her. She has to take a moment to let herself cry, leaning forward in his hold and burying her nose into his neck.
"Gems?" he says slowly, trying to remain calm, but he's freaking out. His heart is racing right now, ready to beat out his chest. This reaction alone is worrisome. "What happened? Talk to me."
She nods her head slowly, pulling back just a bit to wipe under her eyes. "His heart," she manages to get out, hiccuping. "It stopped. He coded."
The news is an utter shock, and Louis feels his own heart stopping short in his chest. Harry died. He died right here in the hospital, and the thought alone has his legs turning in to jello. Almost ready to give out. The air around him thickens, and all the noise around buzzes out. Somehow, he ends up on the floor. Whether from falling or fainting, but he just sits there. Lets it settle deep within him that Harry's heart really gave out. That he really died. Even if for a short moment, but it did. He can't move. He can't breathe. He can't even feel anything. Not aware that he's standing and Zayn had helped him up.
"Louis, Louis," people start to say around him. It still feels like a faint noise. Words that won't register in his head. He looks down at the ground, at the blurry legs in front of him. He tries to breathe, but it gets caught in his throat. He's only brought back to reality when someone gently slaps his face. Most likely Zayn who's all but holding him up. His eyes make contact with Gemma, finally registers her there in front of him.
"Hey, look at me," she says gently, stepping back into his space and now cupping the sides of his face. She tries to get him to focus, waits until his eyes land directly on hers. "He's okay though. They got it - they got his heart working again. It was a scare." Louis blinks owlishly. "He had respiratory distress. They put the vent back on. Just temporary."
The tears return once more. "Wha - wha - " the words get caught, and he begins shaking his head, not being able to accept what he just heard. "His heart stopped?"
Gemma nods, holding his face tightly, leaning forwards so their foreheads can touch. "It's working now. He's okay."
"Why did - why was he off the vent?" He questions frantically, shaking his head again, stepping away from her. His legs must be working now. "Why did they?" Zayn tightens his arms around his body, simply hugging him from behind.
"He was able to breathe on his own," she explains softly, sighing heavily. "And then he struggled to continue. Wasn't getting enough oxygen. The pressure in his brain shot up, but they were able to stabilize everything."
Louis wipes his eyes hastily with the back of his hands before running them down the sides of his face. "Please just, can I see him?" he begs tiredly, feeling like a broken record at this point.
Gemma doesn't even hesitate. She grabs his hand and leads him back towards the room, ignoring any type of visitor protocol the hospital may have. None of it matters at this point.
.•.•.•.•.
Harry paces back and forth in his room, frustration growing rapidly. He checks his phone every few minutes, waiting for a response. Or a call back. It seems like these past few months that's all he's been doing. Just waiting for Louis to find the time to finally respond to him. They haven't been on the same page, clearly. Louis is off at his second year of Uni, playing football for the school. And ever since this season started, he's been absent. Too busy to send a simple text message to his boyfriend.
They're supposed to move in together soon. Once Harry finishes his final year at school, he'll be joining Louis at uni, sharing the apartment together. But with the way things have been looking, he has concerns. Concerns about their relationship. They don't talk as much. Hardly see each other these days. Any time they do get the chance to talk, it's always short. Always ends up in an argument of some kind so the idea that they'll be moving in together seems unrealistic.
The last message he sent was over an hour ago, a simple question asking what his boyfriend was doing. It was a valid question, considering the last time he responded to the boy was last night. Again, after an argument about trying to figure out when they could see each other. It always ends the same. Louis is busy with practice or with team bonding. Or he has an exam one week or an assignment another. Sometimes it's just busy. Nothing more.
His argument is always that Harry should come visit him, but it's like he often forgets the boy has classes of his own. School he can't miss and exams he has to pass in order to get to uni.
It's a stupid cycle of arguing. Last week it was over something stupid. He thinks it had to do with the people Louis hangs around with. A bunch of dick heads, in Harry's words. They're a bad influence. Whenever there is a break in the football season, they're always the first ones to plan a party or an outing to a bar. They're not afraid to drink until they can't see or to say what's really on their mind. They essentially complain that Harry has him on a tight lease. It's the bane of their arguments. This trust that has slowly been breaking between them. Long distance had never been a problem until Louis' second year of university. It probably stemmed from his stellar first season as an incoming player, and now everyone sees him as some hot shot who shouldn't be dating a boy two years younger than him.
The pain has been unreal. Like a shock to his heart that spreads across his chest.
Harry understands though. Or, at least he tries to understand. He's dating someone who is in University now. Louis is older. Has older friends. Has football. A whole team of guys that he's pretty close to. Louis is living a new life now. He parties. He drinks. He has tattoos. He's different. They're supposed to be perfect. Never argue or never fight. The dream power couple. That's what everyone calls them. But any time Harry complains about how long it takes for Louis to respond to him or how he feels so neglected, it just leads to another argument. Leads to snappy messages and long, drawn out phone calls that end in tears.
But god forbid if Harry does the same to him. Give Louis the same treatment in taking forever to respond or seem uninterested in the conversation. Because Louis gets just as mad. Turns everything on him and complains that when he does try to give him attention, Harry is just a hypocrite. There's a double standard, and he hates it. Hates how much this pains him. Hates waiting. Hates arguing. Hates who they have become. Hates the people that he calls his friends. Hates that his friends are always talking so low about him. Harry just hates it all.
Ouch.
It's like a sharp stab into his heart when he thinks about how painful all this is. It stumps him for a moment, his whole body freezing as this pain shoots across his chest. As if his heart is no longer functioning. No longer working when it's not beating for Louis. Not like it used to.
Is this what death feels like? This shell of emptiness that weighs on him.
"Ni, what if it's-what if it's over?" He ends up asking, stops mid pace and turns towards his friend who is sitting on the edge of the bed. "I mean - am I too young for him now? Are we that much different that things can't work out?" The pain shoots across his chest again, his heart stopping for just a moment and he grimaces. "Fuck. He throws that in my face all the time. What if he's ... " A thought crosses his mind, and it sucks the breath right out of him. "What if he's found someone else? Someone older?"
Ouch, again.
It's like his heart stops again. Right there in his chest before there is a shockwave spreading throughout his body. It pains him. To think like this. To worry about where their relationship stands, and he feels so hopeless. So empty. Like deadweight. Harry reaches a hand up to his chest, right over his heart.
"Haz," Niall says softly, patting the spot next to him on the bed. Sighing, Harry walks over to join, sitting next to him, focusing on his breathing to see if it eases any of the pain he's feeling. "He's in uni now. On a football team. S' probably a lot to handle. You know, juggling everything. He's their ace player."
Harry rolls his eyes. "It doesn't hurt to take a few minutes to talk to me though," he defends, voice cracking mid way. He clutches his chest again when the pain returns. They've been together for two years now, and not once has he ever felt so unloved in this relationship until now.
Ouch.
That same pain keeps returning. The one that mimics his heart stopping followed by a stabbing, shocking feeling. Having it disperse across his chest and go down into his finger tips. Like a lighting bolt of electricity, bringing on an unusual kind of spark. Harry has to catch his breath once again, clutching his chest as he stands up. This doesn't feel right.
"It's probably not on purpose, H," Niall tries to reason. He's always trying to bring sense into everything. "He's busy. He's a student and a football player in Uni."
The plush Minnie Mouse that Louis won him on their first date is placed against the pillows on his bed. Harry walks over to grab it, stares at the toy for a moment and then turns around to chunk it across the room. It slams up against the wall, tilting the pictures that are hanging up before falling down.
"It's his teammates," he complains, mindlessly walking over to straighten up the picture frames on the wall. There is a faint reflection of his face on the glass, and he notices that his eyes are beginning to blur with tears. He quickly wipes them away with the collar of his shirt, sniffling when the urge to cry comes on strong. "They're bad influences and I - I'm miserable, Ni." He turns around, and a couple tears slip down his cheek. "I can't make him happy. I'm not even happy."
Niall blows out a big breath and stands from the bed. He walks over to Harry and wraps him in a hug, holding tight. "Call him. See if you can talk about it." When the boy groans, he pulls back, smiling weakly. "Come on, H. Start the conversation off with an I love you or an I miss you. Be vulnerable."
It's a good start. Most of the time he calls Louis, he's always guns blazing into an argument. He can't even remember the last time they said they loved each other. It seems like forever at this point. Almost non existent, and maybe that's the change he can do. If he lets his guard down, prove to Louis that this is eating him up alive on the inside, then maybe they can work through it. He might cry. Is sure that he will when he hears Louis' voice, but maybe that's what needs to happen.
Reluctantly, Harry pulls his phone out his pants and dials his boyfriend's number. He gets voicemail on the first attempt, and Niall has to give him a look to try once more. Kind of like a little reminder to just give this a chance. Harry sighs and tries for a second time, hearing the line ring for a few moments before finally Louis answers. Instantly, he's hit with loud noises going through the line, but he cannot even focus on that because he's more surprised by the fact that his boyfriend answered. Especially with it being later into the evening on a Saturday.
"Louis!" He calls out, trying to contain a smile. This is already starting off on a good note. His boyfriend answered him.
"Ah, my ba-my baby," Louis slurs out, his voice thick with alcohol. The smile instantly wipes away, and Harry has a sinking feeling in his chest. This entire time his phone had been silent, he was hoping there was a valid excuse. Like maybe Louis was busy with football or studying for an exam. Only to find out that his message has been unanswered for hours because his boyfriend is drunk. Probably with those terrible teammates of his.
"Are you drunk?" Harry ends up asking, sounding more irritated than intended. Niall huffs as he goes to sit down, giving him a disapproving look as he does so. Harry simply rolls his eyes in response, turning away as to not look at him.
"Yeah," Louis burps, and there is a string of laughter that is distant in the line. "No, we won our title today. First place baby in the district. Scored three goals, of course I did. I'm a badass. You weren't there so you wouldn't have known, but it doesn't matter because we won."
And, okay wow. Harry didn't even know that he had a game today. Let alone an important one that was a deciding factor to his school's ranking within the conference. It had been briefly mentioned months ago that their last regular season game was on a certain date. And maybe a few weeks ago they have mentioned it, but ever since then, Louis never brought it up. He never reminded Harry, and he never asked him to come. This is the fourth game that he failed to tell Harry about.
It leaves an unsettling twist in Harry's stomach. Because, could it also be his fault? Why didn't he ever ask about it? It's not like it was a complete secret. He has access to the football schedule. Has a poster hanging up in his bedroom. But maybe that's just what their relationship has come to. Neglect.
"If I knew it was today, I would've been there," he ends up saying, voice bitter. He can just feel Niall's roll of his eyes, but he ignores it. Keeps his back to him. But the tears return, and he's doing everything he can to hold it in. To not let them fall, and he hates feeling like this. Feeling so distant from his boyfriend and like he's lost him.
The phone suddenly fades out to laughter, and Harry can easily infer that Louis is out with the team. It's typical for them for a Friday or Saturday night after the game. They're always partying when the chance rises. The terrible influencers. He even hears Louis agreeing to another round of shots, and Harry's momentarily annoyed when his boyfriend is more interested in taking a drink than talking to him.
Eventually, the laughter fades away, and the noise silences in what Harry assumes the phone returning to Louis' ear. " Oh don't worry, sunshine, the only championship sex I'll have tonight is with my hand." The jab to the first time they ever had sex hurts. It happened after Louis won the championship game at Doncaster, and Harry hates how he's using that moment to pick a fight. It was supposed to be a special and intimate moment between them, not a ruse in their argument. "You're not here to do it for me. Maybe tell a knock knock joke for old times' sake?"
That familiar pang returns, and a shockwave electrifies Harry's body. It hurts and it's painful. It feels like his heart is stopping, being sliced right open to the hatefulness of Louis' words. A jolt follows after, and it makes his heart jump in his chest. A sharp pang. He reaches up to clutch his chest again, fingers digging in to his shirt as he takes slow, deep breaths to ease this unusual sensation.
"Are you fucking kidding me right now?" Harry asks once that wave of pain passes. "You really want to act like a dick? Is sex really what you're thinking?"
The background noise starts to get loud again, and there is some muffling on the other line. There is a string of cuss words and other things that Harry cannot make out, but then the phone is getting pressed to an ear again.
"Hey, fuck off," the person says, and it's definitely not Louis. "Loosen the leash you have on him, and let the boy live. He deserves to get laid tonight. He's the MVP."
"MVP," comes from a leu of guys that are around, all chanting it out. Then it's "shots."
The person on the line laughs, and there is a lot of commotion going on that Harry can't comprehend properly. He hears Louis sober up a bit and tell the guy to fuck off. Even starts yelling at the other boys he must be partying with. There are lingering comments that he does end up hearing that all tie in to being on a leash and to finally break up with his shitty boyfriend. But what hurts the most is that Louis doesn't defend him. Doesn't defend their relationship. He's just yelling at everyone to be quiet and leave him alone.
How hard is it to stand up for the person you love? It should be easy. Like a natural instinct.
Niall must hear what's going on, because when Harry turns around, he sees the look on his face. Pity. Disappointed. Sympathy.
"Harry? Baby? You still there?" Louis questions frantically through the line, once he's found a much quieter area to speak. He definitely sounds more sober.
Harry closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, focuses on the oxygen that is going to his heart and supplying all his muscles. It grounds him for a moment. Distracts him from the pain. Then his eyes open, and he sees the Minnie Mouse on the ground. Instinctively, he kicks it, watches as it flies across the room before the anger truly takes over.
"Louis, I am sick and tired of this shit. I am tired of the way you've been acting, and I'm fucking tired of the way you've been treating me," he snaps, voice thick with rage. "I am just tired. Of everything. I'm tired of you and of fighting. You hang out with the absolute worst people I can imagine, and you don't ever stop them from saying terrible shit about me or about us. You just fucking let them stomp all over our relationship and then go off and have drinks with them as if their words mean nothing. You disrespect me, and you disrespect us."
Louis chokes on the line. "Baby - "
"You cannot even take time out of your precious fucking day to talk to me. It's like a fucking chore at this point, and I can't keep doing this. How hard is it to send me a simple text about your day? Or how about the fact that you had a big game today? All you have to do is pick up the fucking phone, and you can't even do that."
"Wait, Harry just calm down," Louis pleads desperately, his voice breaking. "Just listen-"
"No you listen" Harry snaps, "I am supposed to be moving in with you over the summer, but I don't see that happening. I don't even want it to happen at this point anymore because I can't stand you. I can't stand you at all. You're not the person I fell in love with. Not the person who I love." He pauses for just a moment to glance at Niall, only to realize that he's full on crying and can't see anything but blurry figures. "I miss you so fucking much, and you don't even care. All you care about is football, drinking, and hanging out with a bunch of twats who spend every day trying to convince you to leave me or cheat on me. And you do nothing about that. Nothing."
Louis' breath stutters through the line, and it really seems like he's struggling to voice his thoughts. But none of it matters. Because Harry's made up his mind. These past couple of months have been long and miserable, and it's not something he can put up with for much longer.
"I can't do this anymore," he finishes, voice now going slightly quieter, a little bit more hesitant. Not once did he ever think they would break up. Ever. But now that it's here, it hurts. Hurts so fucking much that he cannot believe it. "I can't - I can't be with this version of you. I'm so - I'm so fucking miserable, and I just - I want it to be over. I'm done, Louis. We're over. This is over."
"Wait, Harry stop," Louis manages to get out, frantically and erratically. There is faint sound of something crashing and then a string of cuss words. "Let's just talk about it, okay?"
Harry laughs bitterly, wiping at his eyes so he can see. "We've had months to talk about this. Months. And now, I'm done. It's too late to talk."
"Harry, please - "
The line ends, and then Harry tosses his phone on to the bed, next to where Niall is sitting. He begins to full on cry now, letting the tears and emotions completely take over. The pain he felt earlier returns to his chest, mainly directed to his heart, and it causes him to stumble back on his feet. It hits him hard, like another shock. Then a breeze blows by in the room, and it engulfs his entire body.
The room around shifts, and Niall sitting on the bed suddenly disappears. The black room returns, and when Harry looks up, he sees that a light is shining above his head.
"Hi, baby."
The sweet angelic sound of Louis' voice echoes across the room, and ironically, it brings warmth to his body. Despite how angry he still is.
"Don't call me that," he snaps, yelling it up to the ceiling. His left hand feels funny. Tingles a bit, and somehow, it makes him think of the way Louis holds his hand so tightly.
"I love you, sweetheart. You know that right? So fucking much."
Those three words feel so foreign, but the way they roll off Louis' tongue is so nice to hear. Sends a hot shrill of love through his veins, as if supplying his heart with the right thing to keep on beating.
"S' been awhile since you said that to me. A little late now, don't you think?" He mutters to the sky. This would've been perfect to hear if Louis had said it before the call ended.
"Your heart had a little accident. Kind of stopped working for a bit. Scared the shit out of me, actually."
Harry bites his lip as he presses a hand to his chest, feeling the slow beat of his heart underneath his palm. It's working just fine, or so he thinks. It's no longer hurting as much. "Well, you hurt my heart, Lou. I felt like dying after we broke up. Didn't care at all to live." He sniffles when the urge to cry returns.
"I told you once before that I'm not giving up on you, yeah? It's going to take a lot more than your heart stopping to get me to turn the other way.
I'm with you until the end. Forever and always, okay? You hear that? Always."
The beat underneath his palm starts to pick up speed, and Louis' words bring on a smile to his face. There is an electric shock that runs through his body, originating at his chest. It happens a couple more times and then passes. It's like everything is coming back together again. Healing.
"I do remember, yeah," he reminisces, laughing at the memory. "You showed up on my doorstep a few months after the break up. Trying to win me back. Of course with your stupid cheesy quote." He giggles some more, now feeling light on his feet. "I remember you saying - "
"A flower cannot blossom without sunshine, and a man cannot live without love. Please don't make me live without you."
The memory is something he clings on to as he slowly sits on the ground before laying on his back. He looks up into the black sky, mainly at the light that shines over him. He focuses on Louis' voice and his warm presence, like a blanket that surrounds his body. "My heart doesn't hurt as much anymore." Harry mumbles.
There is motion that occurs next to him, and when Harry turns his head, he sees that Louis is now laying next to him. "Don't scare me like that," he whispers, a stray tear running down his cheek.
Frowning, Harry reaches over to cup the side of his face. "I won't."
"I can't handle you leaving me a third time." His blue eyes are watery as they look in to Harry's, and he can almost feel as Louis' tears drip on to his face. So tangible even though he's laying there next to him.
"I'm not going to leave you, Louis. I came back to you once before, I'll do it again and again and again if I have to," He says softly, scooting closer to his boyfriend, easily getting wrapped up in his arms. "You're the love of my life, and I want you to know that."
Louis smiles as he leans over to give him a kiss. Harry hums happily when he feels the warm press of Louis' lips against his own, a strong sensation that makes his head spin with love.
"Just come back to me, Harry," is the last thing Louis says before his body disappears.
Whoooooop! Another one updated.
What do you guys think about this?
References about his heart during the breakup scene tie in to his heart stopping in real life. Then once he started hearing Louis' voice was when they were bringing him back to life. And once their break up was resolved, his heart started working again.
If you don't understand just lemme know, and I can try my best to explain again.