Everyone has their own means of something that provides an escape.
Something that takes away all of your concerns, conflicts, and worries. Something that makes you lose such intent touch with your own reality, you feel like you're floating.
Sometimes, you completely forget what it's like to be you. You're so mentally far away from your life, you don't even feel like yourself as a real person. You're just drifting, flying, soaring; away from everything that you don't want to address and towards everything you'd rather be facing. You're pushed into a world where everything is okay and you wouldn't want to be anywhere else but there. So much so, that when the high dies and your reality slams back into you, you just want to go back to that dreamlike vision even before you've left.
Reading is my escape.
Nothing fulfills me more than losing myself in a world that isn't mine.
I love investing myself in words that'll take me away from my own life, only to be shoved into someone else's. A life where you know their every thought, emotion, and action. I love getting so caught up in a story, that every aspect of it becomes so lifelike and I forget it's a work of fiction to begin with. I love becoming so immersed in the characters that I feel like they're my friends. When they laugh, I laugh. When they cry, I cry. When they die, I lose a piece of myself as well. And all of this derived from a piece of paper and some ink. Reading is a magic of its own.
It becomes addicting. It's like taking your next hit or drink. You start to crave it the more you involve yourself with it. You need it to get by in life. It's the first thing you turn to when things go wrong, when you're in need of a fun time, or if you're just looking to relax. Suddenly, it's not just something you do. It's something you live. What starts off as a simple exploration becomes a habit. It becomes a lifestyle. You won't even remember what life before it was like and damn if you want to. It becomes all you know and there wouldn't be any going back if you try.
That's why I feel so exhilarated right now. Something about a bookstore, being surrounded by so many stories and worlds you're itching to read about, pushes my anticipation through the roof.
I take a deep breath, loving that new book smell. I walk down the aisles, one at a time, running my hands along the spine of each book as I pass it. I needed this. Needed to get away for some time. I hate when I don't get time to read or feel like I'm drifting away from it. My entire life feels like it needs adjusting if I'm not reading. So, naturally, I'm probably going to walk out of here with an armful of books and an empty bank account. I feel myself grinning. I'm not even sorry.
As of late, Jaxon seems to have become what reading is to me. Addicting. Exhilarating. Distracting. I always want to turn to him, ready to tell him about my good and bad days. I crave his presence, always anticipating the moments I get to be with him. I'm continuously thinking and fantasizing about him. He's consumed me entirely. It would seem he's very close to becoming my escape and that would be dangerous. How do you lose yourself in someone that always slips away?
I grab a book that catches my eye and settle down on the plush, carpeted floor of the bookstore. I lean back against one of the shelves, getting comfortable. When I open the book and begin reading the first line, I smile. It's just like coming home.
Hours later, when the book is finished and I feel myself pulling away from the adventure I just took place in, I rub my bleary eyes and stretch out the kinks in my muscle. Man, that was satisfying. Sometimes I'm convinced reading is more fulfilling than sex. Or maybe I've just had a horribly mediocre sex life. I bet Jaxon could-
Don't.
The trip to the bookstore was so that I wouldn't think about him. But of course, he's at the front of my mind the second I come crashing back to reality. Christ, I'm gonna have to buy an entire shelf to keep my mind occupied.
"I loved that one." A soft voice speaks and I look up to see a stunning girl.
She has long and straight blonde hair and her eyes are the palest shade of grey I've ever seen. She's got a slender nose and a faint smattering of freckles covering it. Her lips are plump and her cheeks are angled. They're also a light shade of pink and I note with amusement that she's definitely the shy type. So much so, I'm betting it took a lot of courage on her part to share her thoughts with a random stranger. I offer her a sincere smile.
"Same here. I just finished reading it." I tell her. She nods and looks like she wants to say something else, but bites her lip and seemingly decides against it.
I find myself studying her. Something about her strikes me as the loner type and I instantly want to reach out to her. Besides, I met her in a bookstore. If that doesn't scream future best friend, I'm not sure what does.
"How's that book?" I nudge my chin towards the book she has in her hands. She looks startled that I'm talking to her and this makes me want to befriend her even more.
"Oh, um, it's actually very good. Probably the best one I've read in a month or so." I can see how her eyes light up and I'm seriously liking her. A book passion can bind two bookworms together more than blood binds a family. Trust me.
"You should buy it." I suggest encouragingly. Her eyes suddenly lose their dim and fall back to the opened pages.
"Maybe." She mutters and I wonder what I did wrong.
She stands up then, placing the book back in its rightful place before putting her hands in her jean pockets. I notice she doesn't have a purse or handbag and I think I'm starting to pick up why she won't buy the book and why my suggestion was enough to send her scrambling.
"Nice meeting you." She looks almost regretful as she walks away.
I'm not sure why her departure actually saddens me having met her for all of two minutes but there was something about that girl that silently screamed for a friend. And I just had an intuitive feeling that her lone status didn't have everything to do with her as a person. She seemed great. In those two minutes, anyways. A random idea strikes me and before I know it, I grab my book and hers and go to the cashier to pay for both. I rush out of the store and start walking around the general area of the mall. She couldn't have gotten too far. A flash of blonde catches my peripheral and I walk towards it, grinning when I get close enough and see that it's her.
"Hey!" I call out and quicken my pace. Several people look towards me but not her. Damn it. I start jogging towards her and give her back a quick tap when I finally reach her. She stops and turns around, eyes widening in surprise when she sees me.
"Seriously girl, you walk fast." I wheeze. Yeah, exercise was not my thing. If you even call a light jog that lasted a minute exercise.
"What's wrong?" She seems confused.
I hold her book up but she looks at me, still confused.
"This is yours." I say.
"I didn't buy it." She shakes her head.
"Well, I did. For you." I shrug and offer her a friendly grin.
"W-what?" She stutters. "No way, I can't take it."
"It's okay. I was going to buy it anyways so I thought I'd give it to you since you like it." It seemed I was going to have to lie a little.
"I don't even know you." She looks aghast but I don't miss the hint of giddiness dancing in her eyes.
"Fine. I'm Emily." I hold a hand out for introduction. She stares at it before finally giving a genuine smile.
"Delilah." She says as she shakes my hand.
"There." I grin. "Now we know each other."
She gives a laugh of surrender before hesitantly taking the book from my outstretched arm. She shakes her head like she can't believe someone would do something for her and I'm glad I did. A good favour never goes to waste.
"Thank you." Tears prickle at her eyes. "This is the nicest thing anyone's done for me."
"Oh, sweetie." I grab her into a hug and though she stiffens at first, she returns it with a tight squeeze. I pull away, content that I've found a new friend. I know how hard they are to make and something about her reached out to me.
"Wanna grab some lunch?" I ask her. Because if I was going to meet a stranger, buy her a book, and demand friendship through the form of a hug all within a total of five minutes, why not ask her to have lunch with me too? A sort of cherry on top to my obviously impulsive decisions.
"I don't have any money on me right now or I would." She tells me regretfully and my earlier suspicious are confirmed.
"My treat." I say.
"No." She shakes her head adamantly. "You bought me this book, I won't allow you to buy me lunch."
"To be fair, I all but forced you into this friendship and I can't think of a better way to keep you in it than food."
"Why food?"
"Food is everything." I defend and her lips twitch.
"That's sweet Emily, but I can't allow you to do that."
"How about you treat us next time? To even it out?"
"Next time?" She sounds taken aback and I have to smile.
"Yeah, next time. One lunch is not nearly enough to solidify a friendship."
I can tell my implication that we're friends makes her happy and she bites her lips thoughtfully.
"Ok." She sounds hesitant but excited. "I'm game."
***
I'm making my way home when my phone pings with an incoming text. For a second I think it's Delilah, and I'm surprised that agonizingly old flip phone even works, but a glance at the screen has my heart leaping into my throat. It's Jaxon. I grab my phone where it's lying on the passenger seat and pick it up when I stop at a red light.
Jaxon: Where r u?
Me: Heading home. Please use your grammar.
Jaxon: LOL. Ms. English. Come by the gym.
Me: Why, what's up?
Jaxon: I'm training.
Me: And I need to be there because...?
Though curiosity was getting the better of me, I set my phone down again as the light goes green and drive, making a U turn when I can to get to Fighter's Den. At the next red light, I check my phone again and laugh at Jaxon's response.
Jaxon: I need motivation. If you're there I'll want to impress you.
I feel my cheeks heat. I loved the days he didn't hold back from flirting.
Me: And here I thought my presence would be distracting.
Jaxon: That too ;)
I shake my head, smiling. Butterflies spread in my belly and I can't believe that he could get me to react like this just through a text. Actually, I could.
Me: Charming. Now go train, I'm on my way.
Jaxon: Bossy much?
Me: You like it.
Jaxon: Tell me about it.
A loud honk breaks me from my trance and I curse when I see the light has turned green. I was staring at Jaxon's last text a little too long to notice. I set my phone down and decide to avoid future disaster by not replying. I'll be there shortly anyways.
When I arrive, it's a little on the late side but the sun hasn't set yet. I enter the gym and immediately spy Jaxon. As usual, my chest feels tight and I want to jump his bones. Jaxon is quite literally the sexiest man I've ever seen. But Jaxon training, all sweaty and shirtless and gleaming muscles? Goodbye, ovaries. He's in the middle of some exercise with Nate and Asher where he spars with one of them, just a few jabs and blocks, then falls to the mat and does a pushup before jumping back up to spar with the other. I can see how hard he's breathing based on the heavy rise and fall of his chest but I don't even think he notices, if the determination in his eyes is any indication. Speaking of, said eyes meet my own and he flashes me a quick wink before quickening his pace and going harder at the excersice. My insides warm when I recall his words. If you're there, I'll want to impress you. And he does look like he's fighting to impress. It's really quite pathetic how badly I want to kiss him.
Luckily, I'm distracted when I see Cameron walk out from the locker room with a bag of popcorn. What the hell? That's how he was contributing to Jaxon's training, playing audience? He puts a finger to his lips when I open my mouth in question and I clamp it shut again. This should be good. Nate and Asher see him approaching from behind Jaxon and stop their sparring, clearly confused.
"Why'd you guys stop?" Jaxon asks in between hard breaths. Before anyone can say anything, Cameron intervenes.
"Boo!" He suddenly yells out, and flings a handful of popcorn at Jaxon. He turns around and the popcorn hits him right in the face. I stifle a laugh.
"What the fuck?" Jaxon demands.
"Boo!" Cameron yells more feverently than the last time and throws another handful. One kernel lands on his eye.
"Cameron, you fucker." Jaxon protests and rubs his eye. "Why the hell are you booing me?"
"During the match, not everyone will be fans. You have to be prepared for hateful commentary and distraction." Cameron explains and I'm literally biting my cheek to stop my laughter.
"I assure you, everyone will be my fan." Jaxon says smugly. That just gets him more popcorn in the face.
"You fucking suck!" Cameron yells and I'm barely holding in my laughter at Jaxon's genuinely enraged expression.
"No, I don't." He defends childishly.
"You call that fighting?" Cameron throws more popcorn and I can no longer hold in my laugh. Nate and Asher look equally amused. Jaxon, however, is visibly trying to stay calm as he takes a deep breath.
"Don't be stupid, I-"
"BOO!" This time Cameron throws the entire freaking bag at the same time Jaxon growls and tackles him to the ground. They land on the floor with a loud thud and begin wrestling each other. Jaxon has the upperhand when he pins Cameron down, grabbing a fistful of popcorn and shoving it in Cameron's face. He leans down and mockingly yells "Boo!" and this is the first time I've seen this degree of immaturity coming from him. It's enough to have me, Nate, and Asher howling in fits of laughter.
"Okay, okay!" Cameron shields his face with his hands in surrender.
"That's what I thought, you asshat." Jaxon smirks.
Cameron returns it and I barely have the energy to prepare myself for what may happen next.
"Fine. I'll just prepare you for the screaming groupies."
"I'm good." Jaxon rolls his eyes but Cameron is a man on a mission.
"Jaxon Cage, you're so hot! I love you, Jaxon!" He exclaims in a disturbingly high pitched voice. Jaxon looks nothing short of horrified and I'm out of breath from laughter.
"Marry me Jaxon!" Cameron reaches out to him and he leans back with a disgusted snort.
"You're too fucking ugly." Jaxon grumbles, smothering his face.
"Fuck me Jaxon!" Cameron grabs for his face and Jaxon swats his hand away, still trying to reconstruct his facial features.
I'm literally about to piss my pants because my dad chooses that exact moment to walk in and halts when he sees what's in front of him; Jaxon straddling Cameron while he's asking to be fucked. I actually snort and this causes Nate and Asher to go red in the face and the three of us are practically wheezing.
"You know," My dad starts blandly. "When I asked you two to work together, this is not what I meant."
Both Cameron and Jaxon flip their heads around at the sound of dad's voice. Jaxon looks both exasperated and even a little and guilty but Cameron just sits up with a neutral expression.
"We didn't mean for you to find out this way." He deadpans, wrapping an arm around Jaxon. That gets him smacked on his cheek.
"Fuck!" Cameron exclaims, covering a hand over the reddening spot but just as quickly grins. "You're fiesty, babe."
"Jesus fucking Christ." Jaxon mumbles and stands up.
When he sees Nate, Asher, and I rolling on the floor and clutching our stomachs, he glares but there's definitely amusement glittering in his eyes. I even hear my dad chuckling. I catch Cameron's eye when he winks and I get it, instantly picking up that he meant to lighten the mood given that the match is tomorrow. I give him a greatful smile through my laughter. Like I said, seriously the most charming man I've ever met.
"Play time's over." My dad announces and the mood gradually becomes more solemn.
"Cage has a big day tomorrow and I've been working his ass off for two weeks. Even I'll admit he needed a dose of Cameron's fucked up humour," Cameron grins at this. "But he needs to rest now. Everybody pack up and get your ugly mugs home. Except my beautiful daughter," This time, I'm grinning. "I expect to see you all at the match at 9pm tomorrow." He claps his hand and we all stand.
Nate, Asher, and Cameron all follow my dad towards the locker room but Jaxon heads toward me. My stomach flutters at his proximity and I'm having a hard time focusing on his face rather than his gleaming body.
"Well," I grin and cross my arms. "That definitely impressed me."
"Cameron's a little shit." He shakes his head with a wry smile.
"It's good to see you guys have created a steady friendship." I note.
"We have." He nods thoughtfully.
"Are you ready for tomorrow?" I finally ask.
"Honestly, I'm not quite sure it's hit me yet. So I can't exactly say if I'm ready but I am prepared to put my fighting to real use."
"You're gonna do great. The crowd will be going crazy over the new talent."
"What about you?" He teases.
"I'll be cheering the loudest." I assure him.
Something flashes in his eyes but it's gone before I can decipher what it is. Then he surprises the hell out of me when he pulls me in for a hug, sturdy arms going around my waist and tugging until I'm plastered against his hard body. My arms go around his neck by instinct.
"You're sweaty." I mildly complain because I'm full of shit. I could care less about something like that when he's touching me.
One of my hands rests on the back of his neck while the other runs through his hair. I don't know what to make of this, of us, but during the moments when it's the two of us none of that matters to begin with. It's just Emily and Jaxon and somehow that makes sense.
"Guys, I- oh."
We both jolt when we hear Cameron's voice and spring apart. I almost smack my forehead at our stupidity because if we just acted normal we wouldn't have come off as guilty. But then I pause. Guilty about what? It's not like we've done anything physically and we've never claimed any feelings out of boundary. So how can this feel so right but so wrong?
"Last minute encouragement." I offer lamely when no one speaks up. Cameron flicks his eyes between the two of us, mild suspicion clear as day, and I can feel Jaxon and I holding our breath. Seriously, why are we acting like we have something to hide?
Because the two of you both know this isn't just a friendship, even if it looks that way.
My conscience needed to shut the hell up.
"Yeah. Cool." Cameron brushes it off and I almost kiss him from relief.
"Jax, Coach is calling a small meeting." And with that, he turns and walks away.
Jaxon and I exchange quick glances. I'm a little unnerved when I see his expression has lost that earlier warmth and is now guarded. Fuck his shutting down.
"See you tomorrow." Cold voice. Great.
He takes off without looking back, leaving me more confused, and angry, than ever.
_________________
A/N
Hi everyone! I'm so sorry for the delay with this chapter, my summer classes have been catching up to me.
What did you guys think of Delilah? I thought I'd add more depth to the story through a new character. And I definitely have plans for her.
I hope you guys had a nice laugh from Jaxon and Cameron's banter. I really wanted to showcase their developing friendship.
Things are going to get intense in the next chapter so I wanted to make this light-hearted. I can't wait for Jaxon's first match!
Please leave your thoughts, comments, and feedback!
Feel free to vote and share this chapter of you enjoyed!
Thank you :)