I'm sitting with Dean has he's making shotgun shells with the ashes. Sam and Bobby are trying to locate Eve.
"Hey. How you doing?" Sam asks as he and Bobby walk into the room.
"Five shells. That's how I'm doing." Dean says.
"Well, you know, it's a hell of a lot more than what we had last week.
"Maybe." I say.
"Meaning?" Bobby asks.
"Meaning Dean just had a mishap with my arm a few minutes ago and, uh, well, here. Look." I take a pinch of the ashes and rub some on my arm. Nothing happens.
"Whoa." Sam says.
"Huh." Bobby says.
"I mean this stuff is supposed to burn the bejeezus out of Eve, doesn't even give her a sunburn." Dean says.
"Lore says it works."
"That's always reliable." I say.
"Well, you know what? Maybe it's like uh, maybe it's like iron or silver. You know? Hurts them, not us." Sam says.
"Maybe, but a fat lot of good it does us til we find the bitch." Dean says.
"I'm looking, but I'm thinking maybe it's time you made a call." Bobby says.
"Why has it always got to be me that makes the call, huh? It's not like Cas lives in my ass. The dude's busy." Cas appears behind him. Dean turns around and sees him. "Cas, get out of my ass!"
"I was never in your... Have you made any progress in locating Eve?" Cas asks.
"Well, we were gonna ask you about that." I say. Cas looks at me, holds the gaze for at least 5 seconds then looks away.
"No, I've looked, but she's hidden from me. She's hidden from all angels."
"Awesome." Dean says sarcastically.
"You know, what we really need is an inside man." Sam says.
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"Some with claws and sympathy."
"Like a friendly monster?" Dean asks. Sam shrugs his shoulders.
"Those are in short supply these days, don't you think?" I say.
"Sure, but we've met one or two, right?" Sam says.
"Maybe."
"So we can find one." Cas disappears to find someone. At least half an hour goes by. Bobby has his face in a book when Cas returns with a girl.
"Lenore." Sam says. She tries to run away. She's the vampire Gordon Walker was after a few years ago. "Wait, wait, wait, wait. Hey, hey. Lenore. Stop. Look, we're happy you're here.
"Been a long time. You remember us?" Dean asks.
"I remember. Your hunter friend almost killed me."
"Well if it makes you feel any better, uh, he turned into a vampire and Sam chopped his head off..." I say feeling the need to throw up again... and I run upstairs. Cas appears beside me as soon as I'm done.
"I can get rid of this." He says.
"No, it's fine. I need to tell Dean soon. I'll tell him after we kill Eve. Why is this such a big deal to you?" I ask.
"I sense that it has a different sort of power to it. It's not completely human."
"What do you mean..?"
"I mean, it feels like...Nephilim."
"Nephilim... like... part you?"
"Yes." Well this just gets better and better. I was hoping it was Dean's so he wouldn't be as mad. Once I clean up my mouth I head back downstairs feeling a little better.
"Grant Pass, Oregon. And now she knows you're coming." Lenore says as I rejoin the conversation.
"Well, let's go see." Bobby says.
"Hold on. I didn't tell you this out of the goodness of my heart. I need something."
"What?" Sam asks.
"Kill me."
"Lenore."
"Look, we'll lock down 'til this whole thing's over, okay? Witness protection, you'll be safe." Dean says.
"You don't get it, it's not about that. I'm dangerous. I hear her voice all the time."
"You're not like rest of them." I say.
"I'm exactly like them. I fed. I couldn't help it. The girl couldn't have been more than 16, Sam. I'll do it again. I can't stop, not anymore. You have to. Please."
"Lenore." Sam says. Cas touches two fingers to Lenore's head. Her face flames and she dies.
"We needed to move this thing along." Cas says. We get our bags together with weapons Cas then teleports all of us to Grant Pass, Oregon. There's people all around, kids are riding bikes.
"Well, I was expecting more Zombieland, less Pleasantville." I say.
"Just because it looks quiet, don't mean it is, especially if she's got a clue were coming." Bobby says.
"Yeah, well if she's here I'm glad we've got Smitey McSmiterton on our squad. Alright, where do we start?" Dean asks.
"I'm gonna need a computer." Bobby says. We get to a dinner and grab a booth. I'm stuck sitting between Dean and Cas. This is awkward... Bobby is looking something up on a tablet. "Alright. I finally got the police database, no thanks to this. I asked for a computer."
"It is a computer." Sam says.
"No, a computer has buttons."
"Can I get you anything else?" Our waitress asks us.
"No, we're good thanks." Dean answers and she walks away.
"Anything?" I ask Bobby.
"Oh, nickel and dime stuff, nothing weird. Basically dead end. You think Vampira was lying?"
"I'll search the town. Give me a moment." Cas says. Nothing happens.
"Cas, we can still see you." I say.
"Yeah, I'm still here."
"Okay, well you don't have to wait on us, you-" Cas gets a really concentrated look on his face. "Well, now it just looks like you're pooping." Dean says.
"Something's wrong."
"What are you stuck?" I ask.
"I'm blocked. I'm powerless."
"You're joking." Dean asks.
"Something in this town, is, uh, it's affecting me. I assume its Eve."
"So wait, Mom's making you limp?"
"Figuratively, yes."
"How?" I ask.
"I don't know, but she is."
"Well, that's great, because without power, you're basically just a baby in a trench coat." Cas looks upset.
"I think you hurt his feelings." Sam says.
"I got something here, maybe. Had to go federal to get it. Call went out from a local office to the CDC last night." Bobby says.
"About what?" I ask.
"A Dr. Silver called in an illness he couldn't identify. Patient's a 25 year old, African-American, named Ed Bright." Bobby turn the tablet around and shows us pictures of Ed's license.
"Well, that's not much to go on."
"Well, it's only a lead, so-"
"So beggars can't be choosers, right? I get it. Alright, let's finish up." I go with Dean and Cas to check out the doctor's office. A woman is locking the door as we walk up to her.
"Excuse me. Hi, uh, is Dr. Silver in today? Our friend is very sick." I ask referring to Cas.
"I have a, painful burning sensation." Cas says.
"Oh, well, he's out, sorry."
"Do you happen to know where he is?" Dean asks.
"He hasn't called in. You might want to find yourself some ointment." The woman says the walks away.
"What kind of doctor calls the CDC and then goes AWOL the very next day? Let's have a look, shall we?" I say then start picking the lock.
"Is this gonna take a long time?" Cas asks. Dean stops me as he notices something.
"What is it?" I ask. Dean bends down and touches a drop of red liquid on the ground. It's blood. There's a small trail leading the side, out of the way of the sidewalk and it leads us to a shed. Dean breaks open the bloody lock. There's a body wrapped plastic. Dean opens the plastic... It's Ed.
"Ohh." Dean says.
"Well what kind of doctor calls the CDC and then stashes the gooey corpse in the shed?" I say.
"I don't understand what's happening here." Cas says.
"Well, I know one thing about the body. We need some kerosene." After we find the tools to torch the body we head over to Ed's house to see if we can find anything there, meeting up with Sam and Bobby.
"Oh. So we've got a missing doctor and an oozy patient, huh?" Dean says.
"Yeah. Plot thickens." Sam says.
"Well, let's go see what Ed's roommates have to say." I say.
"Does Ed Bright have a brother?" Cas asks.
"No, why?" Bobby says.
"Then that's not his twin." We look through the window. Someone is there that looks exactly like Ed.
"So what, shifter?" Sam asks.
"I don't know what we're looking at." Bobby says.
"Alright. Dean, Ash and me are gonna go in. You two stay here and watch the door. If something comes out, shoot it." Sam says.
"Yeah. Best guess - silver bullets." I say.
"I'm fairly unpracticed with firearms." Cas says.
"You know who whines? Babies." Dean says.
The three of us walk towards the house. Dean breaks the door open and we burst in, guns aimed up. There are several dead Eds all over the living room. What the hell...
"Okay. Don't touch anything." I say. One of the Eds starts moving. "Hey, hey. Back here. Come here." I get the guys to go towards this Ed with me. He coughs...a lot.
"Hey, hey, hey. Talk to us. What is it?" Sam asks.
"Hey. Ed. Ed, what's going on?" Dean asks.
"What? I'm not Ed." The guy says. Sam grabs his driver's license. It's a guy named Marshall Todd. "What's wrong with me?"
"Uh, nothing. You're okay, alright? We're gonna get you help." I say.
"Let me ask you something. Do I... do all of us... do we look like Ed?"
"What? No, no. No, no, no, no, no, of course not. You, uh, you have a fever. You're hallucinating." Dean says.
"Marshall, Marshall. Hey. What happened here?" Sam asks.
"Am I gonna die?"
"No, you're not gonna die, okay? Now you need to talk to us. It's important."
"Ed was feeling bad so I took him to the doctor. I think - now we're all sick." More coughs.
"You think?" Dean says.
"And before you got sick, before Ed got sick. Did you do anything? Did you go anywhere? Hey, I need you to focus for me."
"I don't know. Some bar." Marshall says.
"A bar? What bar?" Sam asks.
"8th Street. I guess."
"8th Street, um, did anything happen at the bar? Did you see anything? Did you go anywhere?"
"Look, an ambulance is on the way, okay?" I say.
"A girl."
"A girl? Okay, and?" Dean asks.
"A girl in white." Eve?
"Good. Okay, what did the girl in white do? Marshall? What did she do to Ed? Marshall?" And he's dead...
We walk out of the house to Bobby and Cas.
"I don't get it. What, a bunch of regular Joes wake up shape shifters? What the hell?" I say.
"Shifters usually run in families. This looks like an infection. Nobody touched nothing?" Bobby asks.
"Well I am bathing in Purell tonight." Dean says.
"So, he said they met a girl." Sam says.
"It's got to be Eve." I say.
"But why would she do this?" Cas asks.
"Mommy monster, make more." Bobby says.
"No, no, no, no. Cas has got a good point. I mean if she's gonna make a shifter army, why make one that's sick, gooey and dying?" I say.
"Add hat to the pile of crap that don't make sense."
"So should we hit the bar?" Sam asks. We head over to the 8th Street bar.
There's dead bodies everywhere.
"Well, the Sherff's a moot, but still. You'd think he'd notice this many missing folks." Bobby says. Dean walks up to one of the bodies. Using a cloth he lifts up it's lip. There's vamp fangs.
"We got a vamp over here." Dean says. I go over and lift the bodies arm with the cloth. There's a spike coming from the wrist.
"Nope. Scratch that. We got a wraith. What the hell? What has teeth and a spike?" I say.
"Never seen that in my life." Bobby says.
"Oh, great. So Eve's making hybrids now?" Dean says.
"Looks like."
"Yeah, the question is why. I mean what does she want with the - what do you call these?"
"Well congrats. You discovered it. You get to name it."
"Jefferson Starships." We all look at Dean confused. "Because they're horrible and hard to kill."
"Looks like the whole bar has been turned into these-"
"Jefferson Starships." Dean cuts off Sam.
"Fine. But why are all the... Starships dead?"
"I can't say but looks like they all burned up." Bobby says.
"Burned up, like?" I ask.
"Like a high fever, like the flu."
"What the hell's going on here? Does every monster in this town have the motaba virus?" Dean asks. Suddenly the doors swing open, the Sheriff and two cops enter with guns.
"Hands where I can see them!" The sheriff yells.
"Now this is not what it looks like." Cas says.
"Look, we're the feds." Bobby says.
"Yeah? Well feds are not allowed to do this. Cuff'em. Turn around." Sam, Bobby, Cas and I are all cuffed and led out into the cop cars. Dean must've gone unnoticed. We get taken to the police station.
"Listen, if we can make a phone call, we can straighten this all out." I say.
"Straighten out a massacre? I'd like to see you try."
"J-Jefferson Starships!" Sam yells then kicks one. Cas gets pushed against the wall by one. One tries to bite me. Then Cas is ripping it off me. Dean came to the rescue right on time. Dean throws the one attacking Sam to the ground.
"Dean, wait!" I yell. He gets dragged to the interrogation room. Chained in silver. Bobby has a knife in his hands. Cas and I are standing at the door.
"Well, I'll say this, you're the healthiest looking specimen I've seen all day." Bobby says.
"I take my vitamins." The sheriff says.
"So you wanna tell us what's going on here? Hmm? So you boys are, uh, Eve's cleaning crew, is that it? You, uh - you come around to clean up the bodies? Make sure the word doesn't get out, huh? Is that why you snatched up the doctor?"
"You're so wasting your time. You stupid head of cattle."
We hear something coming from behind us.
"More Starships." Dean says then goes to check out what it is.
"Stay here." Sam says to Cas and I. Bobby cuts the sheriff's face a few times with the silver knife.
"You really think that's gonna make me talk?"
"Something will." Bobby says.
"Got a couple of hungry human boys here. C'mon guys." Dean calls to Cas and I. Cas goes to check while I stay with Bobby." Cas comes back after a while and tells us that Sam and Dean are taking two brothers to their uncles house, a few miles outside of town.
"They won't take long." I say to Cas.
"You don't know that. They may find more wayward orphans along the way."
"Oh, don't get cute." Bobby says sarcastically.
"Right. Pardon me for highlighting their crippling and dangerous empathetic response with 'sarcasm'. It was a bad idea letting them go."
"Come on. You don't let Sam and Dean Winchester do squat. They got what they gotta. You know that. Anyway, we want Eve, we need coordinates. So we can stand here bellyaching or we can go poke that pig 'til he squeals. Thoughts?" Bobby asks, Cas just walks away.
"You know, she can see you right now. And you're just making her mad." The sheriff says.
"Then tell the bitch to come get me." Bobby says.
"I need five minutes alone with him." Cas says as he comes back.
"What for? Cas, your batteries are dead." I say.
"Give me five minutes."
"Alright, fine." Bobby says. Cas walks into the room and closes the door. Bobby and I wait outside. We hear the sheriff screaming from in the room. Cas comes out seconds later wiping blood off his hands.
"Eve's at 25 Buckley Street. You can call Sam and Dean." Cas says. I take a peak in the room... the sheriff was decapitated. I pull out my phone and call Dean.
Sam and Dean get back shortly after.
"Rigorous interrogation, huh?" Says.
"Well, we got a location. Now we just gotta get close enough to take a shot." Bobby says.
"Alright. Well, let's all take one." Dean takes the shells containing phoenix ash out of his pocket. We each take on. "Load 'em up. Make 'em count."
We head to the address that Cas got. It's the diner we were in earlier.
"You gotta be kidding me. She's been in there the whole time?" I ask.
"Why'd she ever let us in? Or out?" Sam asks.
"Well there's one way to find out." Dean says.
"What, just stroll in? We don't know who's human or who's her." Bobby says.
"Well there's one way to draw her out. Me, Sam and Ash will go in."
"Dean."
"Look. If we don't get a shot off, you two better."
"That's the plan?"
"Yeah. Pretty much."
Sam hands Bobby his bag. Dean takes his bag with him. The three of us walk to the diner while Bobby & Cas stay outside.
We find a booth to sit in. There are several people here,
"Now what?" I ask. Sam lifts up his phone to everyone.
"Crap. Crap, crap." Sam says.
"Starships?" Dean asks.
"Yeah."
"Is there anybody in this diner that is not a flesh-eating monster?" I ask.
"Uh, the three of us." Sam says.
"Okay, well let's get the hell out of here." I say.
"Shall we?"
"Three specials, right?" A waitress says as she puts food in front of us.
"Uh, no, that's not for us. We were just headed out." Sam says.
"Now that would be rude, Sam."
"Let me guess. Eve."
"Pleasure."
"Why don't we step outside? Chat?" Dean asks.
"Why? This is private."
The Starships close the blinds so that no one can see in through the windows. One of them takes Dean's bag and opens it. Eve removes one of the guns and smells it.
"Phoenix ash. I'm impressed. I bet you had to go a long way for that."
"You have no idea." I say.
"Destroy these. Thank you." Eve says to one of her monster creations, handing him the bag of guns. "Relax. I'm not here to fight." She says to us
"No? Just to rally every freak on the planet, bring in Khan Worms and-and half-assed spider-men, and dragons. Really, sister? Dragons?" Dean says.
"So I dusted off some of the old classics. I needed help."
"With what? Tearing apart the planet?" I ask.
"You misunderstand me. I never wanted that. Not at first. I liked our arrangement."
"What arrangement?" Sam asks. We get out of the booth and follow her to the counter that is now the only thing separating her from us.
"The natural order. My children turned a few of you, you hunted a few of them. I was happy."
"Okay, so what changed?" Dean asks.
"My children, no thanks to you, started getting kidnapped and tortured. Even my first borns. I was pushed into this. After all, a mother defends her children."
"Really? You're gonna use the Mother of The Year defence? You?"
"It happens to be true. Know what? Maybe you'll believe it if I look a little more like this."
Eve morphs into Mary Winchester.
"Oh, you bitch."
"She died to protect you, didn't she? See. You understand a mother's love. I'm no different."
"Alright, you know what? This conversation's over. If you're gonna kill us, kill us." Now Dean is getting pissed.
"You? No. It's Crowley I want dead."
"Well you're too late there - that little limey mook roasted months ago." I say.
"Crowley's alive."
"That's impossible." Sam says.
"I see his face through the eyes of every child he strings up and skins. Any idea why he's hurting my babies?" Eve asks.
"He wants Purgatory, right? Location, location, location.
"Is that what he told you? It's about the souls."
"What about 'em?" Sam asks.
"Their power, you simple little monkey. Fuel. Each soul a beautiful little nuclear reactor. Put 'em together, you have the sun. Now think what the king of hell could do with that vast, untapped oil well. How powerful he'd be. Now Crowley wants to siphon off my supply, and torture my children to do it? Okay fine. I'll quit playing nice. I'll turn you all. Every soul, mine. Let's see how hot his hell burns when everyone comes to me. He asked for it.
"You know, last I checked, there were a few billion of us. That plan might take a while." I say.
"What exactly do you think I'm doing here? I'm building the perfect beast."
"Wait a second, all those - all those things we've been finding." Sam says.
"Call it beta testing." Eve says.
"Well, I think your formula might be a little off. They're imploding all over town." Dean says,
"Oh, there were a few unfortunate failures. But I eventually got it right. Quiet, smart, inconspicuous. It can spread through a whole town in under a day, oh and the best part - you've been with it the whole time."
DEAN: What?
"Yes, you were the final test. I had to see if it could slip past hunters undetected, of course. Little Ryan." Ryan was probably one of those kids. "You look upset. If it makes you feel any better, Ryan was bound to work on you. Little wayward orphan, like yourselves. There's nothing you can do about it now. So let's talk."
"Nothing to say." Sam says.
"Well, that's where you're wrong. I have an offer to propose. Crowley. As you know, not so easy to find. So, here's the deal. You find him, bring him to me - I let you live."
"Pass." Dean says.
"Dean." Sam says.
"Sam, no. The answer is no."
"You say that like you have another option."
"Maybe we do, maybe we don't." I say.
"You think?
Starships bring Bobby and Cas into the dinner.
"Well, so much for your plan B." She turns to Cas. "And you, wondering why so flaccid? I'm older than you, Castiel. I know what makes angels tick. Long as I'm around, consider yourself unplugged." Then she turns back to us. "Work for me. It's a good deal. Bonus, I won't kill your friends."
"Alright, look. The last few months we've been working for an evil dick. We're not about to sign up for an evil bitch. We don't work with demons. We don't work with monsters. And if that means you gotta kill us, then kill us!" Dean says.
"Or, I turn you. And you do what I want anyway."
"Beat me with a wire hanger, answer's still no."
Eve comes up behind Dean. She grabs his shoulders and has her head next to his. Sam gets up but is restrained by Starships, his struggles do nothing. Eve leers over Dean's shoulder.
"Don't test me."
"Bite me." Dean says.
And then Eve does exactly that and bites into Dean's neck.
"No!" I yell.
"Dean!" Cas yells. Eve stagger back coughing. What...
"Phoenix ash. One shell, once ounce of whiskey. Down the hatch. Little musty on the after burn. Call you later, mom."
A light starts shining from Eve's chest. She changes back into the form we first saw her as. She chokes a lot. The same dark liquid that we saw from the khan worm starts coming out of her mouth and nose and then she falls to the ground and dies. All the starships start attacking.
"Shut your eyes!" Cas yells. We all close our eyes. A car alarm starts going off outside. I open my eyes. All the starships are dead.
"We got to take you on more monster hunts." Bobby says.
"Hey Cas, um, Dean's bleeding pretty good." I say.
"Yeah, I think she turned me into a Jefferson Starship. Could you clear that up too?" Dean asks.
Cas touches Dean's shoulder and the bite mark on his neck is healed.
"Alright, we're good. We got to go. Now." I say.
"Where?" Cas asks.
"The kid. The little kid. He's one of them." Dean says.
"Unbelievable."
"Yeah, I know Cas. You told me, alright. Let's just go." Cas teleports us to the wherever the kid's got taken to.
A man is dead on the floor, their uncle.
"So we kill the wicked witch and she still wins. I mean they could've turned half the town by now." Cas is about to say something. "Don't say it." Dean says.
"Found 'em." Bobby says. We go to where Bobby called and see. They're both dead.
"Well, who ganked them?" Dean asks. I bend down. There's yellow powder...sulfur.
"Demons." I say.
"So what do you think?" Sam asks.
"I think that demons don't give a crap about monster tweens unless they're told to." Dean says.
"So you think she was telling the truth?" I ask.
"The truth about what?" Cas asks.
"She said that Crowley's still kicking." Dean says.
"But I burned his bones, how c-? Was she certain?"
"Sounded pretty sure. According to her, Crowley's still waterboarding her kids, somewhere."
"I don't understand."
"Well he is a crafty son of a bitch." I say.
"I'm an angel. I'll look into immediately." Cas says then disappears.
"Cas! Let us know what you find out!" Dean yells. Bobby and Sam start walking away and then stop. Bobby looks like wants to say something.
"What?" I ask.
"How did Crowley get away? I mean, it's not like Cas to make mistakes like that. Unless-"
"Unless what?" Dean asks.
"Unless he meant to."
"Bobby, this is Cas we're talking about. Do you believe this?" Dean asks Sam then turns to me. "Ash?"
"Look, it's probably nothing, it's just... You know what? You're right. It's probably nothing." Sam says.