After a lengthy and slightly uncomfortable ride back to the tour bus, Lauren's driver unceremoniously dumped her bags in front of the parked tour bus doors and without a goodbye he drove off, tyres kicking up dirt in their wake.
Lauren looked down at her bags and then over at the retreating Mercedes, glaring at the vehicle. 'Thanks for the help, not like I'm crippled or anything,' She grumbled.
Walking up to the bus doors she knocked with the side of her cast. When it became apparent that the bus was empty Lauren grappled with her bags and flung them through the (thankfully) unlocked door – seriously helpful but not very safe guys!
The bus was in the same disarray as it was when she left, if not maybe slightly messier. The upcoming end of their tour was looking more and more appealing with every day they had to spend in this junk yard.
As she pulled her bags through the kitchen, Lauren considered how odd it was to be back. She felt slightly disjointed but at ease all at the same time. It was home away from home, there was a sense of intimacy in the disorder, a familiarity with the chaos that was her life since Fifth Harmony began that she had missed when she was back in Miami.
When Lauren had finally unpacked, stored her bags and hunted down an iPhone charger (seriously those things were like gold dust on the bus), she decided to raid the refrigerator. It was as she was unscrewing the cap of a water bottle that the door opened and Camila's familiar voice yelled, 'I'm getting it now Dinah, Jesus!'
Lauren froze, watching as Camila stopped at the entryway, yelling over her shoulder at Dinah. Her hair fell in waves over her shoulders and the sun, bright behind her, backlit her spectacularly. She looked ethereal almost, angelic in a way that was only belied by the obscenities she was shouting to Dinah.
It felt like years, not weeks, since she had last laid eyes on the beautiful brunette and so Lauren soaked up the beautiful image in front of her whilst Camila was distracted by their Polynesian friend.
Dinah shouted something back in response and Camila replied with an offensive hand gesture –still unaware of Lauren's presence in front of her, as she took the remaining step onto the bus. The door slammed shut behind her just as Camila turned and their eyes met.
Lauren watched Camila's eyes widen and her lips part in shock.
'Hi.' Lauren breathed, waving the water bottle in her hand in and awkward greeting.
After the surprise seemed to dissipate, Camila blinked and whispered a Hi in reply.
Lauren knew she had a dopey looking smile on her face but she couldn't tamper it down, the longer that Camila stood there looking at her, without anger, or loathing, or resignation, the larger her grin became.
'You're back.'
'Yeah, I told you I would be back today.'
'I know it's just...weird, seeing you again'
'You look good,' Lauren complimented.
'You look-' Camila looked her up and down and Lauren tried no to blush, 'less bruised.'
Lauren laughed, 'I'm nearly good as new.' She held up her cast, 'Just need this thing off and I'll be doing handstands in no time.'
Camila nodded but seemed to be contemplating something, Lauren took a moment to be thankful that this meeting wasn't as uncomfortable as she was expecting it to be. Suddenly she surged forwards and wrapped her arms around Lauren in a tight hug.
Lauren was too shocked to do anything but stand frozen on the spot, her arms spread out not touching the girl. She remained still for a few moments and when it seemed like Camila wasn't going to pull away she let the open water bottle drop to the floor and quickly enveloped the shorter girl in the embrace, squeezing them tight together.
She breathed in Camila, her scent and frame a pleasant memory before, now corporeal and tangible in her arms, it made her eyes wet and her lip tremble.
'I'm still mad at you,' Camila intoned, the words spoken into Lauren's collarbone.
Lauren grinned, a watery smile, 'Okay.'
Camila gripped harder and Lauren's smile grew broader. The water bottle on the floor was spilling all over her socked feet and Lauren just kept on smiling.
After her first show back with Fifth Harmony, the first thing that becomes obvious is that dancing with a cast on is not an easy task. She kept dropping the mic and the weight of the plaster was making her arm movements cumbersome and slow and throwing of the syncronisity of their dance moves.
Lauren had stumbled through the show on energy drinks and adrenaline, apologising halfway through when she accidentally smacked Normani on the butt with her cast, and blushed furiously when the crowed laughed after she fumbled with her microphone like it was a hot potato in her hands, for the eight time.
It was still her favourite show of the tour, she was happy and it was in a genuine way that had been lacking for so long.
After the show, Lauren went backstage to their dressing room in search of her prescription pain meds. She hardly took them anymore but her arm had started aching painfully as soon as the adrenaline had started to wear off and her left temple had the tell-tale signs of a headache that was all too familiar since her fall.
Fifteen minutes later, their dressing room was filled with rowdy people and loud music and her headache wasn't ebbing in the slightest so Lauren escaped outside via the fire exit. It lead to a dark back alley that was gloriously peaceful if not slightly creepy.
She was still in her stage outfit but with a hoody thrown over and her battered converse on her feet, she prayed that no paparazzi or fans were lurking around.
The headache abated away with every second of peace and fresh air and she slumped against the brick wall in relief.
The fire door clicked open a few minutes later and Lauren watched Camila quietly step out and then jump a foot in the air when she noticed Lauren loitering in the shadows.
'Holy fuck!' Camila clutched her chest like she was having an actual heart attack and pressed up against the wall opposite Lauren. 'Why the hell are you creeping around I here, I almost pee'd my pants?'
Lauren smirked, bemused at Camila's dramatic reaction. 'I needed some air.'
Camila took some steadying breaths, regaining her composure. 'Yeah, me too, Dinah just decided to try adding Mentos to a bottle of Coke so I made a hasty exit.'
Lauren looked down, noticing Camila was also still in her show outfit but the Cuban was also barefoot.
'Very hasty exit, huh?' Lauren nodded at her feet.
Camila shrugged, stepping closer to Lauren. 'The floor of the tour bus is worse than this, right?'
Lauren nodded absentmindedly, too distracted by the girl in front of her to come up with a response. The limited streetlight in the alley had just cast a warm glow across Camila's features and once again Lauren was floored by the other girl's beauty. Suddenly, it seemed incomprehensible that Lauren could have uttered words that ended their relationship.
She felt a pull, a common urge to reach over and touch Camila. Maybe it is residual adrenaline from the show, maybe it is the warm feeling her medication always gives her, maybe it is just the simple fact that Camila is always inevitable to her, the only constant in her life that draws her close no matter what. Whatever the reason, she pushes away from the wall behind her and walks towards Camila.
She doesn't stop until she is close, not touching, but definitely permeating the brunette's personal bubble. Lauren feels, loose and calm and them together has been the only thing that has felt right when everything else had been wrong.
'I missed your eyes.' Lauren whispered, trailing a finger under Camila's left eye and looking unflinchingly into mocha irises.
'What are you doing?' The breathless question is hot against her cheek.
Lauren ignored the question, choosing instead to move her finger down across her cheekbone to trace along Camila's jaw.
'Have you ever wished, so badly, that you could go back and change your decision?' She spoke softly, but she knew Camila could hear her; they were so close, close enough to hear each other quick breaths from parted lips. 'Have you ever just wanted to start again?'
'Are you talking about us?'
Lauren nodded minutely, letting her forehead rest against Camila's, her eyes drooping at the contact and her lips loose with the proximity.
Camila shudders against her, the Cuban's hands com up to rest on Lauren's shoulders. She thinks she is about to be pulled into another embrace, instead Camila's hands shove hard and Lauren is sent stumbling backwards.
'How dare you?' Camila asks furiously, her eyes turn dark and burn in the dim light.
Lauren knows it's wrong but even through her worry she feels her arousal spike at the predatory look in Camila's eyes.
'How can you tell me you don't care about me, you don't want me and then say you wish you could change things?'
'You don't understand-'
'Yeah, no shit. I have no fucking cue what is going on in your head.' Camila stalks towards her and Lauren inches back until she is pressed against the brick behind her and they are in each other space again and Lauren burns with every moment they're in each others presence.
'You're lying to me,' Camila continues, pointing an accusatory finger at Lauren that presses painfully against her sternum, the pain bleeding into an obscure pleasure that makes Lauren bite down on her lip, 'You've lied to me since the day we broke up, I can see it in your eyes every time you look at me.'
Something in Lauren has been corkscrewing since she sat down in David's office months ago, each syllable passing between them since has twisted and twisted. It takes one more from Camila, a whimpered 'why' for the twisting to cease and snap and the ribbons of self-control seizing her, slither away and slip to the ground.
Lauren grasps Camila at the hips and spins them around, slamming her into the wall with enough force to make her gasp but not too much to hurt. Lauren almost smirks when she sees black irises bleed out into caramel but she's mad and turned on and- 'You want to know the truth? I miss you, all the fucking time, even when you're right in front of me. I dream about you and I wake up and I miss my fucking dreams. I have never wanted anything in my life as much as I want you.' Her fingers are gripping tightly to Camila's hips and flattening her up against the wall. 'So yeah, I regret breaking up with you, I can't stand not being able to touch you, I-'
Her words are stunted by Camila's mouth pressing against her own, hard and furious.
Lauren doesn't even have time to feel surprised because her body is already reciprocating, pressing back just as hard.
The kiss is messy and sloppy, desperate in a way that is heart-breaking. Their teeth clash, their tongues collide.
Camila's hands slide into her hair and pull, tugging hard enough to hurt and Lauren groans and pulls Camila by the waist to push her back, hard, into the wall and feel Camila's own groan of desire vibrate into her mouth, it's a little pain and a lot of pleasure and Lauren's groin pools wet and coils.
Lauren moves her casted hand from Camila's hip and presses it up against the wall by Camila's head as she releases the Cuban's lips to press wet, frantic kisses across Camila's jaw and down her smooth neck. The kisses turn delicate, almost soft until one of Camila's hands slip roughly under Lauren's top and scrape up over quivering ribs to grasp her breast and squeeze. Lauren bites down in response, her teeth pinch the soft skin of Camila's neck and she sucks, causing a small whimper from the girl pressed against her.
She kisses down to Camila's collarbone and nibbles at the sensitive skin, garnering a breathy fuck in response that makes Lauren smirk. The smirk is wiped off pretty quickly when Camila pushes her knee in-between Lauren's legs so that her thigh is pressed up against Lauren's centre and it's her turn to let out an expletive. Her brain short-circuits when Camila uses her other hand to grip the small of her back and thrust her forward.
She should stop this, the thought peaks up through all the arousal flooding her senses but then she looks down and sees their position, she sees the dark desire in Camila's eyes and she feels her own arousal damp in her underwear. Lauren forgets where they are, she forgets that they are technically fighting right now, she forgets they aren't together and that none of this is right. Instead of stopping she forgets.
She is still propped up with her broken arm and she lets her other hand grip hold of the top of the cup of Camila's top, it's a strapless, glittery number with a sweetheart neckline that Lauren pulls down until Camila is fully exposed, practically topless. Lauren takes a second to stare before diving in and pressing hot kisses over perk breasts. She finds a hardened peak and sucks, hard.
Camila's thigh presses up urgently and Lauren thrust her own thigh up into Camila in in a frantic urge to releasing the coiling tension throbbing in her core. They start up a rhythm of rocking into each other; Lauren can feel Camila's heat pressing into her skin.
Licking languidly at her nipple, Lauren speeds up their thrusting, pushing harder and using her hips so that Camila is grunting with each and every push. The girl is giving as good as she is getting and the deep friction against her core is making her head spin.
Somewhere in the back of her mind Lauren knows they should be stopping this. It is father than either of them had gone together when they were actually in a relationship and she knew this was going to be an issue but in the moment she also knew there was no way she could stop now. The increasing rhythm between them was urging her further and further to a peak and by the unrestrained moans coming from Camila she knew the girl was close too.
They rutted against each other, their synchronicity dissipating with their frantic need to come. Lauren thrust and thrust and thru- she reached a crescendo, her spine tingling and her centre pooling hot liquid as she pressed her lips against Camila's swallowing her own muted orgasm as the girl stiffens in her embrace and the turns slack.
The euphoria lasted only seconds before reality bitch-slapped her in the face.
They still clung to each other but the cold night seeped into her skin and awkwardness descended like a thick fog. Lauren slowly moved her leg away, noticing it was colder on the wet patch on her thigh than anywhere else.
Camila covered herself up quickly, looking away and practically running to the fire exit.
Lauren stared at the wall where the woman she loved used to be and wished she knew how to not fuck everything up.
Author's Note:
So this story is nearly over, amazingly. I see maybe 4 more chapters and then we're done.
I want to thank everybody who read, reviews, comments etc. each means so much to me and encourages me to write - so yeah, thanks.
Side Note: The next chapter gets very exciting....so yeah, hold on to your hats folks!