Night has fallen, it's already way past midnight. I don't the the exact time, I didn't want to check either. I need to sleep, but I can't. I've been laying in bed, clutching Jeff's coat, all night.
I changed earlier, tossing on my most comfortable sleep wear. The torn shirt on the my floor is constant reminder of both dead creep and of the fight with Jeff. I haven't left my mom since coming home, even after my mom got home. She had checked on me, I told her I was tired, and then she went to bed herself. The night is going to be long and sad. I've been crying on and off. My head hurts, my eyes are puffy and red.
"You left the window." I don't even have to look to know who spoke. That deep, unforgettable voice is Jeff's. I quickly sit up and look towards the window, where Jeff stands.
He still is dressed in what he left in today, his jeans and tank-top. I still hold his hoodie against me. He is covered in blood, literally cover. Not like he before when there would be splatters off blood on his hoodie and jeans- there isn't a spot that doesn't have blood on it. Fresh blood. His knife is still dripping.
"You shouldn't do that, don't you know there's a killer on the lose?" Jeff jokes. It's a dark joke, but the type of joke I'd expect from him.
"J-Jeff, you're freaking me out a little bit," I admit.
"Sorry, that was in bad taste," Jeff replies. He sets down his bloody knife atop my dresser then walks towards me. He sits down on the edge of my bed. He seems a bit dizzy. I could barely smell the alcohol over the smell of blood. "I don't mean to scare you. You shouldn't be scared of me. I'm not gonna hurt you."
"You're covered in blood, and drunk" I say- it was all I could think to say.
"I know, and I know. I didn't have time to clean it off, I needed to talk to you," Jeff tells me.
"What do you want?" I ask him, it comes out a little more harsh than I would have liked.
"I'm sorry," He apologizes, looking me in the eyes now, "I'm really fucking sorry. I was a dumbass for leaving you alone in that alleyway, I was a dumbass for ever doing anything to hurt you. I knew being around you was a bad fucking idea in the first place, I knew I'd hurt you. But I hated the feeling I got when I thought of what you could be doing away from me. I worried you could be hurt, or falling in love with someone, or you could be so lonely. I wanted you to be safe and I wanted you to be mine, I was being fucking selfish."
His? I think. My heart races, thinking of what dad and I had realized today. "How do you really feel, Jeff?" I ask him.
"I just told you? I'm sorry, I really am," Jeff insist.
"No- I mean how do you feel about me?" I correct.
Jeff goes silent, looking into my eyes. His breath seems to get shakey, and then he says, "I like you, quite a bit more than a person like me should be able to feel." I have no response. After a minute of silence, Jeff continues; "You don't have to like me back. I'm a crazy killer at the end of the day, after all. I have to leave town soon anyway."
"I feel like.." I take a deep breath, "I feel like you're an asshole. I feel like you're nothing but trouble for me. I feel like punching you in the face. I feel like you absolutely insane. And I feel like absolutely insane myself, because I guess.. I like you too. I shouldn't, but I do."
A look of relief comes over Jeff's face. He lets out a small chuckle.
"I am an ass, I am trouble, I do probably deserve to be punched but please not my beautiful face, and I clearly am insane. And yeah, you're kinda crazy too." Jeff says with another laugh. I playfully smack his arm. "So, you forgive me?"
I rub my chin, pretending to think it over. "I guess so."
"Thank you," Jeff says. "I'll see you soon."
Jeff leaves out my window, running off into the forest as he has done before on the other visits he has visited. He still had left his coat.