"What?" I stutter as I step out of the car. My skin goes cold. The blood rushes out of me.
"I love you. I'm coming home. Pack your things." A sound of a man talking in the background distracts me. "I have to go. I'll see you in two days. Happy New Year," my mother says before hanging up abruptly.
I stare down at my phone as I try to process what just happened.
My mom is coming home.
I'm moving back home.
I won't be living with Jake anymore.
I close my car door and look up at Jake's house with a pale face. I won't have time to fix us.
I slowly walk into the house and look around. Peering in every direction for Jake.
"Maya?" Carrie's voice calls from the kitchen.
"Yeah?" I yell out as I walk towards her voice.
"Did you get a call from your mom?" She asks as I turn the corner and see her washing dishes.
"I did. She's coming back," I say as I sit on the barstool.
"I'll help you pack, if you want. It was really, really great having you." She smiles at me as she dries her hands off on a dishrag.
"I'll be fine, thanks. I just didn't realize she would be coming back so soon," I say quietly.
"I didn't either," Carrie trails off. "I wonder why? It's so sudden."
I simply shrug my shoulders as I pop a raspberry in my mouth. "Probably something she won't tell me," I mumble to myself.
We sit in silence for a moment as she dries the pots and pans from this morning's breakfast.
"How was your night?" She asks as she continues to dry the dishes.
"Fun," I huff. "Eventful."
"Doesn't sound very fun," she frowns as she looks at me. "What happened? You were at a party, right?"
"Yeah," I mumble. "I'm okay, I just really messed up." I say as I twirl a piece of my hair around my finger. "Is Jake home?" I ask as I tear my eyes from my twirling.
"Yeah, he's asleep in his bed. He came in really early this morning and didn't say anything. Just collapsed on his bed and slept. Is everything okay with you two?"
I sigh as I gaze around at the kitchen. "No. Honestly, no. And it's all my fault. That's how I messed up."
Carrie's eyes go big as she sets down the dish towel. "What happened?" She says with a concerned tone.
Am I really gonna tell her how I cheated on her son, but that I still love him?
That sounds even more fucked up than I predicted.
"I-" I start, but Sam interrupts me by running into the room.
"Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Spike is tearing up the bedroom!" Sam yells loudly.
"What?" Carrie booms as she rushes to the bedroom. "Spike! No!" I hear her say from the bedroom.
I exhale slowly. Thank God Spike is a chewer. Otherwise, I would have just walked into a very awkward conversation that I'm not ready for, yet.
I stand from the stool and walk towards the staircase. I tiredly climb up the stairs and pass Jake's room. I stop in front of his door and rest my hand on the handle.
I take a deep breath as I turn it and slowly push open his door.
He lies on his bed, still wearing the same clothes from last night. He clutches his pillow, sound asleep. No blankets cover him, and he only wears one shoe. Where's his other shoe?
My heart aches as I close the door. There is no way I will be able to get him back.
I step into my room and begin taking my things off of the shelves and packing them back into my suitcases. The last object I grab is my journal. I stare down at it as my eyes well up with tears.
God, what have I done?
Jake's P.O.V.
"That's the thing," I say as I give Maya a weak smile. "I don't feel anything. I don't hurt. You numbed me again, Maya. And you're gonna have to live with that." I finish as I reach over and open the car door.
"Jacob, please stay in the car. Jacob!" She yells out to me as I slam the door shut.
It takes everything I have to not climb back into the car. To hold her. To tell her all I ever wanted was her. To make her mine forever and always.
But I can't make her happy, and she expressed that in the most obvious way.
"Goodbye, Maya," I say as I toss her car keys at her. I'm tired of this. "I'll see you at home."
I turn and walk off. I don't know where to. Honestly, I have no clue where I'm walking. I just know I have to be away from her. She suffocates me.
Whenever I would look at her, my breath would be taken away. She truly was breath taking. But I'm starting to realize that just being in her presence was suffocating me. She isn't breath taking, she's smothering.
The world spins. Those pills I took are strong. Too strong. The pot I smoked didn't help either. Neither did the vodka. Cross faded as fuck.
I pull my phone out of my pocket. "Taylor. Bro, you gotta come pick me up. I'm fucked up," I laugh as I look around at the unfamiliar houses.
"Dude, where are you? Rick can come pick you up. We found another party. After party, dude. It's a fucking rager."
"Corner of 5th and Ivy. Bro, you gotta come pick me up. I'm fucked up," I repeat.
"You already said that, dude," Taylor laughs.
I did?
"Just hurry your fucking ass up and get me."
...
"Party's here!" Taylor yells as we step through the door. Many familiar faces from the earlier party whoop and holler as we step into the living room. The house is small. One story with a basement. People are crowded into the home.
I squeeze through the crowd of crazy teenagers and college students. It's rare to find a party where college students and high schoolers are actually getting along.
I step into the kitchen and find some other guys from my school.
"Aye! It's the man!" Colin, a friend from my Physics class, yells at me.
"You know it," I laugh as I grab a bottle of cheap tequila.
I pour two shots and hand one to Colin. He has his hand around a girls waist. She's pretty. Red head. Green eyes. Big tits. Exactly what Colin would go for.
"Hey! Pour me one!" She says.
"Me too!" Shouts the voice of a girl as she walks up behind me. I turn and my jaw drops.
"Tiffany?" I say as her eyes light up.
"Jake! Oh my God! Long time no see," she smiles as she hugs me.
"No fucking way. It's been forever. How's life?" I ask as I pour two more shots.
Her once short, blond hair is now long. Her braces are gone, and she finally grew into her ears. She's hot.
"Not too shabby," she jokes as I hand her and her friend a shot. We all throw back the cheap tequila and wince. We all bite into some lime wedges. "How about you?"
"Fucked up. As always. I've gotten used to it though," I smile at her as she leans back onto the counter. She wears a tight pair of jeans and high top white chucks with a white tank top.
"Story of my life. Anyways, how's everyone at Valley High? I haven't seen them in a while."
Tiffany used to go to out high school. Then, she moved across town, and no one knew why. She suddenly switched and enrolled in our rival high school, Citrus High. She was a year older than me. She goes to the university now.
Long story short, we smashed a few times. This was back when she was cute. But now, she's fucking hot. Something happened between those two years of not seeing her. She grew up.
"Everyone is pretty shit. I can't handle any of them for any longer than five minutes at a time. But, I'll be out of there by the end of this semester."
"Well that's good! Any plans for college?" She asks as she reaches over and grabs a red solo cup.
"Not a fucking clue," I laugh as she pours a drink out of the punch bowl.
She raises her eye brows as she takes a sip of the drink. "You sound like me. You know, I miss seeing you guys. We should hang out soon."
"Absolutely," I smile at her.
"Unless you're seeing someone. Are you seeing anyone?" She asks. I look at the ground. I honestly don't know, am I?
"No. Who do you think I am?" I laugh as she joins in.
Suddenly, a douchey frat boy slams into her. Her drink spills down the front of her white tank top.
"Mother fucker!" She yells as the frat boy laughs and walks off. "I knew I shouldn't have worn white."
"Here, I'll help you clean up." I say as we walk to a bathroom. She steps in and I close the door. I walk over and sit on the edge of the bathtub.
She grabs a few handfuls of paper towels and attempts to dab her shirt. I look up at her as she wipes her chest.
And now I'm staring at her tits.
Of course I am.
She glances down at me and smirks. "Eyes are up here, asshole." She laughs.
I look up at her face. "Oh trust me, I know where your eyes are," I smirk.
She rolls her eyes and smiles back. "You've always been smooth." She turns back at looks in the mirror. "Gimme your shirt."
"What?" I laugh at her as she takes off her tank top. "I like where this is going." I joke as she tosses her tank top in the trash can. She wears a lacy maroon bra. I bet it would look better in that trash can, too.
I stand up and walk over to her.
"You're beautiful," I say as she looks up at me.
"How many girls have you said that to?" she laughs as I glance down at her bra.
"None that I actually meant it." I smirk at her.
Her eyes dart down to my lips.
I cut her off by leaning down and kissing her. She wraps her arms around my neck, lacing her fingers through my hair. My hands slide down and grab her ass. I lift her up onto the counter. She wraps her legs around my waist as I kiss her neck.
"Jake," she says breathlessly.
My hands rest on her hips. My thumbs hook her belt loops and I give a slight tug. Her hands continue to tangle in my hair as I return to kissing her mouth.
"Jake," she says as she pulls away.
"You kinda ruined a perfect moment," I smirk as she rolls her hazel eyes, yet again.
"You wanna get outta here? My roommate is out of town. We can go back to my place." She whispers in my ear.
I smirk as I pull away from her. "Better get you a shirt, then."
"You're wearing a sweatshirt. Just give me the shirt your wearing underneath it."
I shrug as I back up and take off my sweatshirt. "Wait, is this just a ploy for you to see my abs?" I joke as I reach back and grab my shirt near the shoulder blades and pull it off.
She rolls her eyes and I toss my white V-neck at her.
"You always were an eye roller," I laugh as she puts my shirt on. It's big on her, so she ties a knot in the side of it. The V-neck reveals the top lace of her bra.
Damn, she looks good.
I look her up and down as she fixes her hair in the mirror. I pull my sweatshirt over myself as she eyes my abs.
"My eyes are up here," I joke.
...
"Home, sweet home," Tiffany says as we stumble into her small dorm room. It's the basic dorm room. Two twin beds. Two dressers. One desk. It's tiny, but livable. It's fairly neat. A few bras and clothing articles are strewn about, but that's much cleaner than my room.
"Nice. So, what are you majoring in again?" I slur as I sit down on one of the twin beds, assuming it is hers. Better ask her a few questions before I just go straight to fucking. She closes the door and locks it.
I am much more drunk than she is. I'm fucked up.
"Marine biology," she says as she takes a seat next to me. "I'm gonna get my laptop and I can turn on Netflix, yeah?"
I nod at her as she stands and grabs her MacBook from off of her desk.
So, Netflix and chill? I can definitely do Netflix and chill.
She sets the laptop on the dresser at the foot of her bed. "So, what do you want to watch?" she asks as she begins searching Netflix.
"I don't fucking care," I slur as I kick off my shoes.
Not like we're gonna be watching it anyways.
"Alright, then Clueless?" She says as she turns on some chick flick.
What the fuck is this?
Oh well, not gonna be watching it anyways.
She leans back and lies down next to me as the movie begins. I put my arm around her, and she leans into me. She puts her head on my chest, and I put my hand on her ass. She looks up at me and I lean in to kiss her.
Might as well get down to business.
She pulls away. "Woah, Jake. I wanna watch the movie. Did you really think we just came here to fuck?" She says defensively.
"Uh," I fumble. I look at the movie, and then back at her. "Well, yeah. I guess." I laugh. "Why else am I here?"
She laughs. "I'm just fucking with you." She says as she sits up and throws her leg over me. She's straddling me.
Now this is where I wanted it to go.
She leans down and starts kissing me. I rest my hands on her hips as we deepen the kiss. I tug at the bottom of her shirt, and she gets the message. She takes a second to take off her shirt, revealing that sexy fucking bra. She leans back in and begins to kiss me again. She rocks back and forth on my lap.
She obviously knows what she's doing.
I put my hand on her back, and slowly slide it up to her bra clasp. I undo her bra with one hand.
I've gotten quiet good at that.
She tosses her bra to the side. Completely bare.
I tank off my sweatshirt and toss it to the floor. She grabs my hands and puts them on her tits.
Well.
If you say so.
She begins to suck on my neck as I tug on her belt loops. She reaches down and unbuckles my belt, pulling down my zipper.
I look up at her.
Wait.
Wait.
I begin to see two of her.
"Maya?" I mumble as my eyes begin to close.
She sits up abruptly. "Who the fuck is Maya?" She snaps.
But I was out cold.
...
My eyes slowly open as I look around the small dorm room. I look over at the clock. Seven in the morning. Great.
I suddenly notice a pair of long, tan legs tangled around me.
Uh.
Um.
What?
I look over to see Tiffany.
Fuck. I came here with her last night. Did we fuck? Fuck.
I slowly slide out from underneath her and lightly place my feet onto the floor.
Where are my pants? And shirt?
What the fuck happened last night?
Why is she only wearing a pair of panties? Well, I'm not mad about that one.
I slowly gather all of my clothes, except for my left shoe. I can't find that anywhere, and I don't have time to find it. I get dressed (without my one shoe) before slipping out the door.
Poor girl. Sorry I couldn't stick around, Tiff, but I don't feel like having a conversation with you. Especially when I'm this hungover. My head fucking hurts.
I step out into the cold morning air. I need to get home. I look around the dorm area.
It's about a thirty minute walk from here to my house. Walk of Shame? I think yes.
...
I slowly open the door of my house and stumble in. 7:45 am. Everyone is still asleep. My head is pounding. What happened last night?
Maya cheated on me, that's for fucking sure.
I fucked Tiffany. But wait, did I? Or did I black out? I can't fucking remember. Last thing I remember was taking off her bra.
I creep up the stairs, every step sending a pounding to my brain. I rest my hand on the door handle to my room, and then I glance over at Maya's. Is she home?
I slowly creep over to her door and peek in. Her bed is empty. Worry flushes through me.
Is she okay?
Did she make it to someone's house alright?
Did she get hurt?
And perhaps the biggest question of all, do I really care?
I'll ponder that one over a nap.
I close her door and step into my room. I collapse on my bed and don't bother using blankets.
What the fuck did I do.
Maya's P.O.V.
"Maya, do you need any help?" Carrie asks as she taps on the door frame. I am packing away my clothes in another suitcase.
"I think I'm fine. Could you just grab me my phone from my purse?" I ask as I gesture to it on the bed.
"No problem, Hun," Carrie says as she picks up my purse from last night. She starts digging through it. "Here it is," she says as she lightly tosses it to me. I catch it. I need to charge it.
"Thanks," I smile at her.
"Wait," she says as she looks down into my purse. She grabs something.
What does she have?
She holds up the pill that I took from Kat at the party last night.
"What's this?" She says as her voice rises. "Is this ecstasy, Maya? In my home? Are you using drugs?" She whisper shouts at me. Obviously not wanting to wake Jake, or have Sam run in.
"No! Carrie! It's not what it looks like. I swear. My friend had it last night and I took it from her," I say as I quickly stand to my feet.
"Maya, I need you to be honest with me. Are you abusing drugs?" She asks in all seriousness.
"Carrie, of course not. I would never do that sort of thing. Let alone bring it into your house," I plead my case.
She looks at me with uncertainty. "I'm going to tell your mother about this. I'm not sure what your doing in your time or not, but this is serious."
"Please, Carrie! Don't tell my mom. She will freak out on me. She will ground me for the rest of time!" I beg. "Please believe me! I would never do that."
Carrie eyes me. "This is serious, Maya. I'm not just going to shrug this off. I'm not your mother, she is. And I can't parent you. It's her job."
"Well, she's the one who decided to leave me for three months. Lie to me. See my dad. Lie to me again. And then crash into my world by telling me she's coming back home. Please, Carrie. Give me a little break. I will tell her about it when the time is right, I promise. But life is just too complicated right now to add this onto my list of problems." I beg. If my mom thought I was doing drugs, my life would be over. Physically, mentally and socially.
Carrie eyes me again with the same amount of uncertainty as before. "Fine. But if I ever catch you with any more pills, I'm telling your mother right away. I just don't want you going down Jake's path," she says quietly.
I nod and walk over to hug her. "Thank you so much for understanding."
She slips the pill in her back pocket. "I'm going to flush this, so don't go looking for it."
"I would never," I say as I walk back over to my suitcase and begin filling it with more of my clothes.
She is silent for a minute as she leans in the doorway.
"I don't know what happened between you and Jacob. And you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But all I want you to know is that I hope you guys work it out. You were really good for each other." She says before exiting my room. "Give me a holler if you need any help."
"Thanks Carrie."
You were really good for each other.
That may possibly be the most untrue statement I have ever heard. We are both toxic to one another. We fight fire with fire. Before we know it, we both go up in flames. That's just how it works out. Always.
~A/N~
One word...
Summer.
summersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummersummer
As you all can tell, I'm pretty damn excited.
So, this chapter was spicier than usual. But I had a lot of fun writing it.
Lemme rant:
My life is a mess. Honestly. Ever try to fix a fuckboy? Yeah, I'm starting to realize that it's not working. I'm trying to change him. But the only one that is changing is me.
Better cut that one loose before I do anything idiotic, right?
Fucking guys make me mad.
I'll finally get over him and then he'll call me at two in the morning high as a fucking kite and be like, "You were the first person I thought of talking to. I love talking to you. You make me want to change."
And then he pulls me back into his tAnGlEd wEb Of BuLLsHiT.
So yeah. That's me right now.
Starting to understand how Maya feels.
Alright. Rant is over.
On a happier note, I aced all of my finals! Hell yeah. I thought I failed my Biology final but I got a 97%???? Somehow???? Maybe I prayed hard enough, haha.
Please vote, comment, and follow me for more interesting stories about my (and Maya's) fucked up love life.
It's 11 pm right now. So, I'm going to go to sleep. Hopefully when I wake up I see a lot of comments and reads! I've got to say, I'm pretty proud of myself for all of my updates recently.
Thanks for reading. Love you all.
Update coming soon.
Happy Summer!