I woke with a start as Brenna opened the curtains. My head felt just as heavy as my tear-soaked eyelids as I rolled away from the light, unwilling to face what this dawn would bring. I'd spent what little time I'd had in bed debating between whether I should run or stay. In the end, I fell asleep undecided, but my last thought was that I owed it to Andrew to stay if that was what he had asked of me.
Even if I had no intention of utilizing whatever prestige that being named as one of his top three would grant me, it was the one last gift he wanted to give to me and I wouldn't throw it away. As tempting as it was to run and not have to endure the ceremony, he had been right last night when he said that I would only be hunted down and hauled back by my parents. I wasn't at the age of maturity yet and as much as Xavier would take me under his wing, I couldn't tear him a half a world away from Georgina to escape my own fate.
"Time for us to start getting you ready," Brenna said, a smile tugging the corners of her mouth up. I forced one onto my face as well, for I had to play along as if I had no idea who Andrew was really picking. A set of scullery maids had brought me up a bath and Elspeth tugged off my nightdress, humming contentedly to herself. When Brenna left us alone to go set out my dress, I realized that I'd never thanked Elspeth for all she'd done yesterday.
"Elspeth..." I started, sloshing the water around the copper bath basin as I swivelled towards her, "You have no idea how thankful I am for everything you did yesterday. If there is ever any way I can repay you..."
"I know," the quiet maid smiled, "And you don't have to do anything for me, I'd do it all over again if I had to."
I didn't have the heart to tell her that everything she'd done had been in vain as she smiled down at me, resuming her quiet humming.
"I thought perhaps you might like to wear that sapphire necklace of yours today," Brenna called over to us, laying out a spectacular royal blue gown from the collection the queen had commissioned for me. It was regal and refined and would have been perfect if I'd actually been the one Andrew would stand before today.
"Of course," I managed, my throat squeezing shut. The thought of wearing last Season's necklace on a day like today had my stomach coiling into a painful knot.
I felt an ache where a familiar warmth had once been when I thought of Andrew, the feel of his fingers as he'd left me at my door, just as unwilling to let go as I was. The tears I'd cried after the door had closed between us. The empty hallway I'd faced when I tore that door open, not ready to say goodbye yet. The cold bed I'd crawled into, drowning in my own tears when the hallway turned out to be empty. Try as I might to forget them, my lips were still tingling from all the kisses we'd shared last night and I had to keep reminding myself to stop craving them, that they were the last I would ever know from him.
I stayed silent through the morning, as Brenna and Elspeth flitted around the room, fussing over me. I was thankful for Brenna, since left to my own devices I'd have probably turned out unbathed and unadorned in a plain linen housedress. As it was, there was little they could do about the state of my eyes, both maids tactfully neglected to comment on my appearance. Instead, Elspeth took some extra time applying powders and cosmetics to my face in an attempt to hide the fatigued purple smudges under my sad blue eyes.
Eventually Brenna stood me up to tie me into my corset. I didn't give her as much trouble as I usually did as she laced it up, which earned a worried look, but she chattered on with Elspeth, filling the silence I refused to break. They fixed my hair and fastened my jewels and adjusted my skirts. Elspeth coaxed me to drink a cup of tea, which did wonders for my pounding head, but just the smell of the toast sent my stomach churning. I couldn't help but think of all those pies I'd turned away last night.
Finally, with a flourish, Brenna sprayed me with a cloud of perfume before pronouncing me perfect.
"And now, we await your brother," she said, surveying her work with a pleased little smile.
"Vee?" I repeated dumbly, wondering if I'd burst into tears at the sight of my brother and ruin their hours of hard work.
"Of course! He'll be escorting you," she said, "Are you quite certain I can't tempt you with any food? You're looking so pale this morning..."
"I'm fine," I said flatly, turning my gaze back towards the fire. I didn't say anything else as my maids got to tidying up the mess left in the wake of my toilette. They talked softly amongst themselves, probably assuming I was nervous for the upcoming announcement. I hoped they didn't realize I was contemplating the gaping hole in my chest where my heart had once been, the sapphire and diamond necklace a cold manacle around my neck.
Right when I had almost worked up my nerve to run, no matter what Andrew had asked, there was a knock at the door. Brenna hurried to answer it, showing Xavier in. I stood, my stomach swooping with dread as I turned to face him.
"You look wonderful," he said, taking in my ensemble with a worried look to my downcast face.
"Shall we go?" was all I said, unable to look at him for fear of unleashing the tears pooling in my eyes. My brother offered his arm with a quiet thanks to the maids. I was in too much of a hurry to leave and be done with this that I hadn't stopped to contemplate what would be awaiting me in the hallway.
I halted dead in my tracks as Adelaide Winters' tinkling laugh echoed from her suite. She stepped out several doors in front of us, glittering in a white and silver gown that could have passed for a wedding dress. She was wrapped up in the attention she was receiving from a bevy of other debutantes and ladies in waiting, her shining blonde hair piled atop her head with just enough space for a tiara she surely hoped to set there in a few hours' time. An older gentleman, likely her father, Lord Winters, was casting an amused look around at the other tittering girls until his gaze landed on me.
"Chin up," Xavier said beside me. I gulped, realizing I'd been holding my breath.
Adelaide's father leaned down to whisper something to her and without missing a beat, the beautiful blonde bid farewell to her friends and flounced away ahead of us, never once looking my way.
"I don't think I can do this," I whispered, tugging Xavier's hand to make him stop.
"It's almost over, Libby. You just need to be strong for a little longer," he said kindly.
Tears brimmed and I tried to blink them away. I wanted to tell him that it wasn't just a little longer, I would have to be strong for the rest of my life after being forced into a front row seat to my own heartbreak. But there wasn't enough time to explain now, so I swallowed the lump in my throat and forced down my panic.
In the entrance hall, Adelaide had lined up first, her father casting proud glances her way as she fiddled with her dress, arranging and rearranging it as we waited. Dulciana waltzed in surrounded by a dozen well-dressed Ardalonians, all of them prattling on excitedly in Ardal, their native language. Her dress was golden and inlaid with more precious stones than I could count. A massive, sparkling tiara sat atop her dark curls, a glaring reminder that she alone was the only royal candidate. Ambassador DeGallo was the tall, silent figure in their midst, his sneering glare landing squarely on me the moment he noticed me. I did my best to ignore him, my attention wholly focused on the mass of people in the ballroom before us.
Without warning, a fanfare blew and the footmen opened the doors before Adelaide.
"This is it," she whispered, a glorious smile splitting her face as her father tucked her trembling hand into his.
"Good luck, my princess," he said as they started down the velvet carpet toward the thrones at the other end of the room. With a snide remark in Ardal that set her entourage to titters, Dulciana pointed her nose in the air, following Adelaide. She tinkled and glittered as she moved, like a treasure chest come to life. I had barely enough time to wonder how incredibly weighty her dress must be before the hundreds of eyes in the ballroom turned to me.
"Chin up," Xavier said once again, giving my hand a squeeze as he hooked his arm around it. I let out a shaky breath, unable to speak.
Adelaide had knelt on a small square of red velvet carpeting to the right of the stairs leading to the thrones. The king and queen looked down at her while Dulciana approached, dropping a much shallower curtsey over the second square of velvet set directly in front of the monarchs.
I found myself holding my breath as we approached the dais. Exhaling, I gulped a fresh lungful of air, willing the tears to stay hidden behind my lacquered lashes. Feeling my suffering, Xavier gave my hand another squeeze, looking down at me with years of kindness in his eyes. I belatedly wished I'd called on him for help, as his incredible brain would have thought up some way out of this predicament that didn't involve me humiliating myself by bursting into tears before the entire court. We approached my own square before the dais and paused, Xavier breaking protocol to plant a protective kiss on the top of my head.
"Don't forget how loved you are, Libby, no matter what," he whispered, before taking a step back to retreat behind the other escorts. I couldn't bring myself to look at the royal family as I sank to my knees, fixated on the red velvet carpet that covered the marble stairs before me.
"Their Majesties King Graham and Queen Isabelle of Pretania wish to present His Royal Highness Prince Andrew's three potential brides, Her Highness Princess Dulciana of Ardalone, Adelaide Winters, and Elizabeth Marks-Whelan," the herald proclaimed as the ballroom fell silent.
I closed my eyes, forcing back the tears, before opening them to focus solely on the plush carpet before me. I started counting dust motes in a poor attempt at fighting the darkness that was about to envelop me.
Dulciana had won him. In a matter of moments, he'd be walking down to stand before her while the rest of the royal court applauded. Perhaps even Ambassador DeGallo would finally smile as the kingdoms of Pretania and Ardalone rejoiced. I shook the thought from my head and started imagining my escape plan, listing all the friends I'd send hasty goodbyes to so I wouldn't have to spend a minute longer in this infernal palace...
"And now, His Royal Highness, Prince Andrew of Pretania."
The trumpets blared and I bit my lip, clenching my fists in the folds of my skirt. Nothing was worth having to witness this, to stand by with a smile while the love of my life chose someone else to marry. I would willingly go bake cakes or scrub floors for the rest of my days instead, if it meant I could run away before I had to watch Andrew escort Dulciana up to stand beside his parents.
I had wanted to endure today for him, but now that I was faced with it, now that I could hear his boots on the marble between his parents' thrones, I couldn't breathe. I desperately tried to quell my shaking, but it was all I could do to keep from passing out on the cold marble floor. I squeezed my eyes shut as my peripheral vision caught his foot taking the first step down towards us. My already broken heart would shatter into a million, irreparable pieces if I had to watch him smile as he bowed before Dulciana.
His steps seemed to stretch into an eternity, positively thunderous to my ears. I'd counted them as I'd walked down the aisle towards the dais: he had seven steps before he reached his three debutantes. Seven steps he would descend alone, then seven steps he would ascend with his new bride-to-be, leading her to her permanent place beside him, on the crown princess' throne.
Six...
The quizzical expression on his face when he stumbled upon me in the north building hallway on my first night at the palace.
Five...
The way he'd cornered me at last Season's masquerade, where I'd been stupid enough to rebuff him.
Four...
His lips on mine in the moonlight of Audra's workshop.
Three...
The pain on his face when we'd fought in the Winter Garden.
Two...
His green eyes gazing up at me as he sank to a knee last night.
One...
The way his face had lit up with wonder when I'd told him that I loved him in return, all those nights ago...
I fought hard to keep down a sob. Dulciana would be looking at him now, triumph masked by reverence in her eyes. I waited to hear the gentle click of her heeled slippers as she rose, her hand in his.
But the click never came. Swallowing hard, I opened my eyes, clamping my teeth together to steel myself against whatever painful sight I was sure to witness.
Instead of staring down at red velvet carpet, I was staring at a pair of shining black leather boots. I had to blink several times before my entire world tilted on its axis.
Andrew was looking down at me, a gentle, encouraging smile on his face as he held out his hand. I inhaled for the first time since his boots had hit the marble, the sound coming out as a gasp.
"What are you doing?" I whispered, looking up at him.
"I'm choosing you," he whispered back.
"But-" I began, a million thoughts clamouring to the forefront of my mind. What about the treaty? What about the king?
"Plans and backup plans and a brother named Thomas," he smiled, "Now stop stalling because I'd very much like to marry you, Libby."
I could feel the tears running hot down my face now, the floodgates unprepared for this new turn of events. But through the tears I smiled, my face splitting in a grin so wide my cheeks ached.
I unclenched my fists, taking Andrew's warm hand with my icy one, as he helped me to my feet. Dulciana's face had warped into a snarling mask of utter disbelief as Andrew led me past her. Behind her, Ambassador DeGallo's face was a mottled purple, his murderous gaze fixed on someone up on the royal dais. We paused at the base of the stairs, Andrew granting me a moment to adjust my skirts so I wouldn't step on them as we climbed. Tucking my hand into the crook of his elbow, he gave it a squeeze as we took the stairs one at a time, rising up towards his family.
Plucking up the last reserves of my courage, I looked up at the king and queen. The king's displeasure was masked behind a stony smile, but that was to be expected now that Andrew had botched his planned alliance. Next to him, the queen had happy tears in her eyes as she inclined her head to me. Beside her, Thomas and Anne were grinning, Thomas shooting me a wink until Anne elbowed him.
"Presenting his Royal Highness, Prince Andrew of Pretania, and his betrothed, Miss Elizabeth Marks-Whelan," the herald called out. The hall before us sank to their knees and I felt my breath catch again. Xavier caught my eye as he took a knee, tears shining in his blue eyes as he held a hand to his chest. Beside him, Georgina was grinning, her dimples on display as she dipped a curtsey.
Overwhelmed, I looked up at Andrew only to find him looking at me. When our eyes met, his crinkled with a smile as he brushed his thumb across my cheek, wiping away the tears.
"You look beautiful, my love," he whispered. I couldn't help but laugh as he led me to sit on the cushy little throne next to his.
"I think I'm stuck in a dream," I whispered back. It was Andrew's turn to laugh, his eyes dancing in that magical way as he leaned down to kiss me. The rest of the court rose, bursting into applause as my heart filled with light, joy, and hope.