I crumpled up the paper and let it drop to the ground.
"What did it say?" he asked.
I just hugged him again and said, "It doesn't matter, he's just being an asshole."
"That does seem to be a certain specialty of his." he muttered into my hair.
"I'm just so glad you're okay." I tightened my grip.
"Of course I am," I could feel him smile against the side of my head, "It takes more than just that bastard to get rid of me."
I pulled away and wiped my eyes a bit, "What happened? Where did you go?"
"I was in the house, locked in the basement," he shrugged, "I went back to the alley after that, um, night, and was pounced on. All those people who slept in that alley, every single one, were working for him. Can you believe that?"
"At this point I would believe anything," I laughed dryly.
"Although the really surprising part was learning about this," he gestured to the dress, "I didn't see that one coming at all."
"Me neither."
"I don't know whether or not to be happy about it."
I made a face at him in surprise, "What do you mean by that?"
"Oh no, I mean I'm not happy about it by any means," he back peddled, "I just, you know, I'm really happy he didn't kill you. That's what I was afraid of."
I let my face fall a bit, "Honestly this isn't much better."
He pursed his lips together and reached up to stroke my face, but I flinched away from the pressure, a habit I'd gained from having a perpetually sore cheek.
"We'll figure it out," he whispered, "I swear."
"It does't feel that way," I sighed, "This is pretty binding." I stepped back and spun a little in my dress to emphasize my point.
He just shook his head and stepped forward, "I know this isn't great, but we're both still here, and we're both still alive. We can work with that, it's worked well for us so far."
"That was different, this is too much. He has too much power over us now. He'll kill my family if we try to pull anything." I could feel my voice rising anxiously and he put his hand up, fingers just grazing my lips, gesturing for me to speak softer. I smacked it away softly.
"He might be able to hear what were saying," he breathed.
I snorted, "Fucking probably."
I turned around and went to sit down, an action my dress did not fully agree with. But the weight of what was about to happen was to heavy, I felt like my legs were going to buckle under me. There was no way I could go through with it, but no way I couldn't either.
"Hey, hey," I could hear the sadness in his voice as he stooped to his knee in front of me, "You can't give up on me here."
I just shook my head, there was nothing to say. I wasn't giving up, I was just accepting how things were going to have to be. He wasn't going to be able to fix it, and I shouldn't have expected him to be able to. I'd just been living in the fantasy that, if he were here, all of my other issues would just sort of work themselves out. But as I looked at the boy on his knees in front of me, I knew it wasn't going to be that simple.
"Please don't do this Bo, you're so strong, we'll figure this out." he pleaded.
I hated the desperation in his voice. I wanted to have as much confidence in myself as he seemed to have in me, but I just couldn't. We'd both been depending too much on the idea that the other would find a way out of this.
"We're going to be alright, you're just talking yourself into the ground." he took my hand and held it firmly in his.
"It depends on what your definition of alright is." I made a sound that resembled a laugh.
"You just can't give up like this, please, I don't know what I'll do if you give up." he brought my hand up to his face and pressed it against his cheek, "You can't lose all hope just because things are tough right now."
I looked at him with his newly softened skin and strategically messy hair. It wasn't really the Peter I knew, but the way he looked at me made me feel that familiar flutter that I'd missed so much. There was a sense of hope in that old feeling.
Right at that moment my family was safe and happy and Peter was standing right there in front of me, which was all I really wanted in some ways.
"You're never allowed to disappear again," I said, gripping his hand tightly between both of mine.
"I'm sure we can have that arranged." he smiled at me, and it was that same smile. Despite everything, all that we'd seen and been through, it was always that same smile. I had no idea how he pulled it off so seamlessly all the time, but it was all I needed for the time being.
I stood back up and took some deep breaths. He got to his feet and his smile turned into a grin.
"Don't be so proud of yourself."
He put his hands up, "It's not my fault all you ever need is a good pep talk."
"Sure," I rolled my eyes and felt lighter than I had in months. It was like I hadn't smiled in so long my muscles could barely remember how to form the expression properly.
Then Randalls note flashed through my mind and I felt myself grit my teeth. That bastard really knew how to fuck with me. But having Peter here wasn't something I could bring myself to argue with.
For now at least, I could play into it. I might as well.
before either of us could say anything else the door opened and a man I'd never seen before, wearing a matching outfit to Peter's said, "We need you."
"Okay, one minute." he waved the man off and then turned back to me, "Duty calls."
"Duty?"
He gave me a half-hearted grin, "Haven't you heard? I'm the best man."