'I need to let you go
Your eyes, they shine so bright
I want to save their light
I can't escape this now
Unless you show me how'
• Chapter Three •
How is it that I always end in awkward situations without meaning to? Did I have an imam or something? Shane was staring at me as if trying to decipher something on my face. I stared right back, wondering if he had lost his voice. Unable to stand the silence anymore, I spoke:
"Shane, you don't have to do th–"
"Why are you avoiding me?" he asked seriously. I was taken aback by his question. He knew exactly why I was sort of avoiding him. But I couldn't tell him the real reason, of course. What was I going to say? 'Hey, Shane. I'm kind of avoiding you because you told me you loved when you were drunk'
That wouldn't be awkward at all.
So, I went for a more simple approach, "I'm not avoiding you." I retorted, shaking my head. He pursed his lips.
"Yes, you are. Why?" he paused, his hazel eyes were glistening with annoyance, "Is your freaky boyfriend involved in this? Did he tell you not to speak to me?"
I frowned, "First of all, he's not freaky. His name is Evan. And of course not, why would he do that?"
Shane shrugged, "He could be jealous and I can't blame him," he gestured his body.
I rolled my eyes, "Oh please!"
"Jules!" I heard Lau's scream from the road "We're ready! Let's go!"
Thanks God!
I turned around but Shane grabbed my arm, "No, we're not leaving until you tell me why,"
For the love of sacred Ruffles, give me a break!
"I'm not avoiding you," I repeated, yanking my arm off. He looked at me worriedly. I sighed, "Do you... remember what you said to me in Evan's house?" I had to ask. It was eating me inside. Shane furrowed his eyebrows.
"What I said to you?" he tilted his head aside.
"When you were drunk..." I pressed nervously. I could not believe I was actually trying to make him remember that.
"Did we talk when I was drunk?" he asked, looking genially confused. Ok, it was official.
Shane did not remember telling me he loved me.
I felt relieved, because that would make things easier between us.
"Why do you look so relieved?" he squinted his eyes at me before looking shocked "Oh! You totally felt me up when I was drunk, didn't you?"
I could not believe this guy, "What?"
"Yes, you did. That's why you're avoiding me now. Naughty Minion!" he smirked at me, poking my forehead.
I grimaced, "I did not! How could I... no!"
"You couldn't keep your hands off me." He stated smugly, "I know you can't help it, babe but please, that's too much. I feel a little dirty right now," I groaned, punching his shoulder.
"I didn't touch you!" he chuckled.
"Naughty naughty Jules!" he wiggled his eyebrows.
"I–"
"Jules! What the hell are you doing there?" It was Jason screaming at us now. I could see the desperation on his face and it was then I got it. He was alone with Lau and Jordan. Yep, my best friend needed me.
"We better get back,"
"Are we good now?" he offered me his hand "It's okay if you got touchy with me while I was drunk. I forgive you." I rolled my eyes, shaking his hand.
"Seriously, I did not touch you." I muttered, as we walked back to the road.
"Next time, you don't need to take advantage of me. I would be more than pleased to help with your virgin situation." I slapped his head, hard.
**
"Come on! Sing along, Jay-Jay!" Lau exclaimed, putting her fist in front of Jason's face pretending it was a microphone.
"I'm not singing," Jason said, keeping his eyes on the road.
"Boring Jay-Jay!" Lau accused him, retracting her hand.
"This is my favorite part!" I shouted excitedly.
"Let's sing it together!" Lau was leaning forwards so bad; she was almost in the passenger seat with me.
"Don't you ever say I just walked away, I will always want you!" we sang along with the radio. There was a pause in the song, Lau and I got ready to sing our lungs out.
"Oh God," Jason muttered.
"I came in like a wrecking ball! I never hit so hard in love. All I wanted was to break your walls. All you ever did was wreck me. Yeah, you, you wreeeeeeeeck me,"
We'd never been fans of Miley Cyrus but that song was catchy. I gotta admit that.
"Ok that's enough!" Jason turned the radio off.
"Hey!" I complained.
"Party pooper!" Lau pouted.
"Mercy, please!" Jason pleaded, "My ears are bleeding, ladies,"
Lau huffed, "What are you talking about? We're great singers." I laughed.
Jason glanced at her through the rear-mirror, "Are you sure about that?"
"Totally," she grinned at him.
"That's right!" I gave her a high five. Jason shook his head.
"You two forgot your petition to enter the school's chorus last year was denied?" Jason reminded us "The instructor described your voices as the closest sound to the apocalypses,"
"I had the flu!" I protested, "My voice wasn't in its best moment, alright?"
"She's right. We were both sick that week." Lau backed me up "Leave us alone, Mr. I've-never-been-good-at-sports."
"Just because I'm a guy, it doesn't mean I have to be good at sports." I smiled at him. He had a point.
"Right. You should learn from Jordan," Lau said dreamily. Jason's expression hardened, my smiled vanished. "He's a great football player and also has a sweet side. He can draw beautifully," she sighed. I watched Jason tense up. He squeezed the steering wheel.
"He's perfect, isn't he?" Jason whispered sarcastically.
"Of course, he is." Lau didn't notice his sarcasm "The other day, he made me this amazing drawing and I-"
"We don't need to hear about your perfect boyfriend," Jason snapped at her nastily.
Very smooth, Jason.
I thought sarcastically. Lau was staring at him, shocked.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" she asked, scowling at him, "Are you on your period or something?"
"No, but I'm sure we can talk about more important things than your boyfriend."
"Jason," I reprehended him. This was getting out of hand. Jason peered at me, seeming to realize what he was doing. Regret filled his expression.
"What's wrong with you?" Lau repeated her question.
"Nothing." Jason stated, regaining his control "I'm sorry. I just... didn't sleep well last night. Sorry!"
"It's cool." Lau gave him a closed mouth smile.
I expected the rest of the ride to be awkward or silent but as soon as we turned the radio on it was all back to normal.
We passed the Welcome to River-town sign and a lump crawled its way to my throat. My hands started sweating; my stomach was feeling funny even though I was not hungry.
I was going to see Evan, finally.
As soon as my eyes spotted his two store house, I instantly felt so nervous I was afraid I would end vomiting all over Jason's car board. Considering I'd had pancakes with different syrops for breakfast, it wouldn't be a nice decoration. It would be quite of colorful, if you ask me.
That was graphic, wasn't it?
I took a deep breath, trying to normalize my unhealthy breathing. I wish I could explain how I felt. The overwhelming feeling in my chest was spreading across my entire body. It's amazing how your body reacts to your emotions. My heart was pumping blood as fast as possible; my throat was dry of all the sudden. The thought of facing him was making me dizzy.
Get a grip, Jules!
He was my boyfriend. I could not act all nervous and clumsy around him. I didn't want him to think I was some immature, inexperienced teenager –which I was– but he didn't need to know that. I had to keep in mind that he was not only older than me but he had also been through lots of things the majority of people never went through in their entire life.
Jason parked in front of Evan's house and glanced at me, "You're ready?" I nodded eagerly. I knew they were not coming with me which made me feel even more nervous.
"We will be at the town's bar." Lau squeezed my shoulder "Shane and Jordan are waiting for us there. Text me when you're ready to go. Take your time, okay?" they were so good friends. They had driven all the way here for me and were willing to wait for me as I spent some time with my boyfriend.
"What if he's not there?" I asked, biting my lower lip.
"Helen said his shift ends at 3 pm, and it's..." Jason trailed off, checking his watch "3:30 pm."
Lau pinched my cheek, "stop being a chicken and go. You've been whining about not seeing him for the past week so go, now!" I unbuckled my seatbelt and opened the door.
"Thanks for this, guys." I gave them a genuine smile.
Jason returned the smile, doing a military salute "Always to serve you, m'lady."
I chuckled, closing the car's door. I watched them drive away. The day was still pretty hot. Waves of hot wind kept brushing past my skin; they weren't helping with my sweaty hands situation. I took a few long breaths before turning around to face Evan's house. I crossed his front garden slowly; it surprised me to see how beautiful his flowers were. Someone was definitely taking good care of them, unlike my house's garden. I shuddered, remembering Mom's dead sunflowers. It was insulting that a man could take better care of a garden than two girls.
I let my hand slide over his flowers. I pictured him, watering the garden, shirtless. Sweat was covering his sexy torso as he splashed water on his face to refresh himself a little. I was pretty sure I was dribbling when I stepped on the front steps almost falling on my hands and knees.
Oh God, I need help!
Recovering and fixing my short summer dress, I found myself in front of his door. I knocked on his door, swearing my heart was about to rip its way out of my chest. I heard movement inside the house so he was there.
This is what I expected: I expected to see my boyfriend shirtless, smiling sweetly at me as I screamed 'surprise' like the idiotic girl in love I am. However, life was really full of surprises and of course, that was not what happened.
Instead, a brunette opened the door, smiling at me politely. My heart fell and I was lost of words for exactly 5 seconds until she spoke,
"Hey, may I help you?" her hair was all messy around her face.
Was this cliché or what?
I never thought something so cliché would happen to me. You know, the girlfriend going all surprise on her boyfriend to find him with another girl. I wasn't mentally ready to deal with a situation like this. So, I stood there unable to move or do something. I barely found my voice.
"Hi," I forced a smile on my lips. To make things worse, the girl was wearing shorts and a loose t-shirt with any bra on. She had no bra! The nerves!
"Can I help you?" she asked again, staring at me expectantly. She looked older than me, probably 19 or even more.
"Is Evan home?"
"No yet, he's probably on his way here." She explained, typing something on her phone before looking back at me "And you are..."
"Jules," her eyes widened for a moment.
"You're Jules?" she scanned my body shamelessly "Wow, I expected you to be more..." she didn't finish her sentence but somehow I felt insulted "Come inside. I'm sure Evan is about to get here," she stepped aside, leaving room for me to get inside. I stayed in my spot. She noticed my frozen state and it seemed like it clicked inside her head, "Oh, I'm Jane by the way. I'm his best friend,"
"He's never mentioned you before," I pointed out nastily. I know I was being mean but hey, get on my shoes. What would you do if you were in my position? She wasn't wearing any bra! So excuse me, but I had the right to be a little bitchy for now.
"That sounds like him. He's not much of talker, isn't he?" she commented, leading me into the living room "Take a seat. Would you like something to drink?" she offered me, smiling at me. Why was she being this nice? I nodded my head, sitting on the main couch "Is green tea okay with you? We ran out of coca cola." My entire world stopped right there.
We ran out of coca cola...
Key word: We.
The word kept replaying inside my head, leaving a bitter taste inside my mouth. We, as in, we lived together. Did this girl live here? It hit me like a wall of cement. That was why she was wearing these careless clothes. That was why she didn't seem fazed by my arrival. It was her home; I was the intruder, not her.
Jane came out of the kitchen, holding a cup of hot tea. She gave it me to me while I whispered 'thanks' to her. She sat on the couch across me.
"So! I finally get to meet you." She said, watching me closely.
"Do you live here?" I wasn't able to hold the question back any longer. Jane seemed confused for a second.
"Yeah, he didn't tell you?" there was something hidden in her tone. Was it victory? Maybe I was just imagining things. I shook my head. Sympathy filled her expression, "He probably didn't have time to tell you. I moved in last week,"
"Why?" God, I sounded like an obsessed girlfriend but I had the right to question this entire situation. She was living with my boyfriend; they were alone in this big house. Alone...
Breathe, Jules, breathe.
Jane frowned, "I've been sleeping around friends houses for the past months. It's a temporary thing. I will find my own place soon I hope. I'm saving money for it."
I stared at her, "Where are your parents?"
Jane's frown grew at this question. Sadness filled her hazel eyes, "I'm sorry. I just met you and you're making too many questions."
"Sorry." I muttered, sipping on my tea.
"It's cool." She smiled brightly at me. There was a long silence but it wasn't awkward, we just didn't have much to say to each other since we had just met. It was then we heard the front door opened.
"Jane!" Evan shouted, stepping inside "I brought your favorite cupcakes. You owe me dinner." He was carrying a paper bag. He was putting his keys inside his pocket. I felt left out, like I was interrupting something here. I noticed Jane smiling sweetly at him from the corner of my eye "I'm thinking of Chinese for to-"It was then he looked up and his dark eyes landed on me. He looked even hotter than I remembered. He was wearing dark jeans and a blue elegant shirt. His hair was longer than before; it looked sexily messy around his handsome face. God, he was just so beautiful. It took my breath my away. I forgot about Jane, I forgot about everything. The world around me disappeared entirely.
We stared into each other's eyes for what it looked like an eternity. It all rushed back into my mind: his nicknames, his jokes, his smirk, his poems, his kisses, his pain, just everything. I loved him so much it made my heart ache. He didn't even say a word. He didn't need to. I could see everything in the dark pool of his eyes. A grin crawled to my face. He was here, finally.
My breath hitched when I saw him drop the paper bag and take long strides towards me. He wrapped his strong arms around my waist and lifted me from the floor. He hugged me so tight, I couldn't breathe. He buried his face in my neck. He smelled great as usual. He pulled back only to stamp his lips against mine, taking me by surprise. His lips felt amazing against mine. I found my mouth responding to him, giving into the kiss. I missed him so much. His hands held my face, whilst he continued kissing me like there was no tomorrow. The kiss was filled with need. He tasted sweet. I shivered when I felt him suck on my lower lip. Eagerly, I opened my mouth to him. Our tongues brushed, sending chills running through my spine. He pulled me closer to him, our bodies glued against each other.
I loved kissing this boy.
He pulled back, so we could catch our breaths. We were breathing heavily as if we both ran a marathon.
I looked into his deep black eyes and whispered, "Surprise."