"Hello, Tony."
"Hey."
"Is that a drill? Are you back in the- God damn it."
"What?"
"You should be sleeping."
"You- Sleep. Go sleep."
"Nice one."
"What's up?"
"I'm apologizing for Steve's behavior. Because he has no idea what he's doing. He's- Well, he's an imbecile. So. Sorry he was throwing things. He doesn't normally do that. And he doesn't mean you're difficult to deal with, he just means you're difficult to- Get along with. He doesn't mean to be condescending. He's..."
"Look, Bucky, I appreciate this," Tony sighed. "But you apologizing for Steve isn't really-"
"I know. I know. But just- This is a new Steve. I used to know a different Steve. This one- He's- Condescending. And high-horse...y. But he was always like that. Now he's just big and the literal Captain of America. He's just stubborn. And I know he's- But- You just gotta stick with it. Because he's a good guy. Really."
"Unfortunately, I agree with you. I'm gonna stick with it."
"Praise the freakin' Lord."
"I love him, I can't just... Of course, he's thinking about just leaving which is-"
"He is not leaving. He didn't mean that. He thought- Okay, he didn't think that one through, but I know he meant well, and he just- He was never good with the chicks, right? That was all me," Bucky snickered. "Ahem. Anyways. Now he's still not good with anyone. He's bad at being- Good at- Relationships? I- He just flies by the seat of his pants."
"Handsome, boy does he know it."
"That- What are you singing?"
"It's from Hamilton, you said a- Nevermind. It's getting a lot of Tony awards."
"Steve was just texting me about that. You two are- You're similar! Just really stubborn!"
"We'll be fine. And if we're not, it'll be my fault. Because. I do that."
"Tonyyyyyyy."
"I just don't think he likes me."
"What?"
"I don't know. Ignore me. I need like a thousand Xanax right now and I'm out of coffee. And I need sleep."
"Mhm."
"Do you know where Steve is?"
"I can send him your way."
"Great. Can you also send me enough sleeping pills to put me in a coma?"
"No, but I bet Bruce can."
"Haaaaaa!"
"Get it? Cos he put Loki in a coma?"
"You're hilarious."
"I know, I know."