Camila woke up to sniffling in the bunk across from hers, so she slid open her curtain and carefully reached over to pull Lauren's back a bit.
Lauren was laying on her stomach, face in her pillow.
"Lo?" Camila shyly whispered.
Lauren stilled, contemplating on looking over at her bandmates confused face. She never let the girls see her cry. She's been doing that a lot lately if she was being truthful. At night, when she was sure everyone else was asleep, she would pull out her head phones and flip to her stomach to drench her pillow in sorrow.
This isn't the first time Lauren's been caught be the younger girl. She just hasn't told her why she'd been crying all this time.
Like now, Camila would always roll out of her bunk onto the floor, and crawl into Lauren's to comfort her.
The girls often shared a bunk if they wanted to watch a movie or share an intimate conversation or if they just got lonely and wanted to cuddle.
Lauren watched as Camilla started to roll out of her bunk.
"Not tonight." She warned, fragile and vulnerable.
Camila stopped and made quick eye contact with stained red and emerald diamonds. Red because of the amount of crying she had been doing. Emerald because wow.. Those eyes..
It's been going on for about a week now.
6 days actually.
6 days since they left Miami to continue their tour.
6 days since she'd last seen Luis.
6 days since he told her distance wasn't working out for him.
6 days since he broke her heart.
Lauren's not one to show her feelings.
She keeps things inside.
She listens though...
She's a great listener!
However, she never speaks her mind.
She keeps all her problems building up in her system until they get so concealed and suffocated they burst.
Yeah, she's that type of sad.
And now??
She's breaking right now.
Camila can see that and she understood that if the older girl needed her space, she should grant it to her.
Camila's heart ached for her best friend, though. She seemed to be okay during the day or when she was around the girls, but when she waited until everyone was asleep, she knows her best friend was hurting.
"Okay babe." Camila says, retracting back into her little bunk. "Take the time you need." She smiled sweetly, letting Lauren's curtain slip closed.
She stayed there for a moment though. Propped onto her hands, half way in and half way out of her bunk, staring at the closed curtain in front of her. She huffed, hearing Lauren's muffled sobs in her pillow.
-
She swears that if that boy has been hurting her again she'd end him.
The thought boils inside Camila as she looks over at Lauren, playing with the food on her plate in the back stage cafeteria of their next gig.
Lauren looks over at Camila, feeling the side of her head burn with silent daggers for eyes.
She offers a small smile, but she's still mad.
She mouths Luis? and Lauren shakes her head slowly.
Camila's jaw clenched. She's had enough of his bullshit. Calling her late hours in the night/all hours of the day drunk off his ass. Camila doesn't mean to, but the curiosity in her often has an ear to the door or casually standing around the corner from where she's speaking to her boyfriend.
Dinah laughs loud and dominant, jolting Camila from her gaze at Lauren.
"Mani, you're too funny!" The youngest laughs, slamming a hand on the table.
After Camila checks the source of the noise she turns back to her main interest, noticing the other girl turned back to playing with her food on her fork.
She looks so small, so innocent and sweet when she's in this vulnerable state. Yet, she's still Beautiful. Even when she cried, Camila concluded.
Camila's always thought Lauren was attractive. All of the fifth harmony girls were, but her eyes always wondered to Lauren's the most.
She bites her lip as their tour manager walks in warning 20 minutes until they had to get ready for stage time.
Lauren huffs and takes her plate to the garbage, throwing out the food she's hardly touched.
Camila's eyes follow Lauren as she walks passed the younger girl and out the double doors.
"What's up with Lauren?" Ally asks, tapping Camila's arm.
"I don't know, she's just not herself right now." The younger one lies, having just been told the source of the older brunettes discomfort, she's not sure she would appreciate the confession going around.
Ally's facial features sinks, she knows the feeling of helplessness when she sees it, and the band has seen that frequently this past week.
Ally deflated, huffing in acknowledgment. "You should go talk to her."
Camila shrugs. "She just needs time. She'll be ready for show time. She knows what's more important."
The smallest of the group takes an uneaten Apple off her tray and hands it to Camila. "She hasn't eaten." The bandmate motions for Camila to take it, which she does with a small smile and a mouthed thank you, and with that, she's out the door, leaving her lunch behind for the others to clean (as usual).
-
She finds Lauren in her dressing room, practicing breathing techniques their choreographer had taught them.
Camila leaned against the door quietly, watching as Lauren's stomach muscles rose and relaxed with every breath. Her eyes were closed so she couldn't see the gaze. At least, that's what Camila thought.
"You're staring." Lauren chuckled.
Camila cleared her throat and presented the apple Ally had given her with a sweet smile.
Lauren smiled back with a huff and walked over to Camila. As she approached the shorter girl, her eyes became sad again and her lips curled down.
"Oh no baby don't cry.." Camila wrapped her arms around Lauren's torso, the taller girls' arms around her neck.
"He's such an ass." Lauren chocked.
"And you're too good for him." Camila closed her eyes and smoothed the curls in Lauren's hair with one hand, still holding onto the apple with the other.
"God don't you think I know that?" Lauren snorted, backing up to wipe her eyes.
Camila took control of finishing off the tears with her sweater sleeves. Lauren looked down, tears still running. "Why are you so good to me?" Lauren asked, holding one of Camila's hands and taking the apple from her other.
It didn't take Camila long to come up with an answer. "Because I got the pleasure of loving you more than that douche canoe ever could."
They both laughed and fell into comfortable silence as Lauren bit into her apple.
"So, did you want to talk about it?" Camila asked, cautiously.
Lauren's face fell again.
Fuck, wrong move Cabello.
"Sorry." Camila knew her wrong and searched the other girls face for some sort of emotion.
"No, no, you know what it's okay." Lauren nodded and took another bite. "You're right."
Camila raised an eyebrow at how fast this girl changed her mind.
"I am better than him." Camila smiled as Lauren chewed. "But maybe this is a conversation for after the show??"
Camila took Lauren's free hand in both of hers, drawing pictures in her palm. "Sure, whatever you need."
-
She's not really sure how it happens, but it happens..
One minute the girls are celebrating their awesome show and then next Lauren has her tongue down Camila's throat.
Just seconds ago, Lauren had taken Camila's hand and dragged her into her dressing room. She slammed the door and Camila giggled asking What are we doing? and then Lauren had her pinned against the back of the door.
Sure Camila thought Lauren was pretty and smart and that whole bad girl image maybe had her mind racing with how nice her ass looked and- wait what? This is Lauren and Camila we're talking about. BEST FRIENDS. Best friends don't kiss. Not like this anyway. Best friends don't think about how great their best friends ass looked on stage tonight. Best friends don't moan into each other's mouths as one pushes her knee into the others core.
Camila's eyes shot open as she pushed Lauren back slightly.
Both girls looked at each other, catching their breaths.
Lauren made me moan. Camila thought. Her fingers somehow found their way to her lips where she felt around the tingles, watching Lauren intently.
Lauren's eyes filled with all sorts of emotions. "I'm sorry, I just.." She started to cry again, kneeling on the floor, face in her hands. "I just don't understand this feeling."
Camila stood still, looking at the same place Lauren was just standing. Lauren kissed me... And I... I think I liked it...
"I just feel so lost and so lonely and I hoped you'd have the answer.." There was another moment of just hearing Lauren's sniffles. "He cheated on me Camz.."
Camila snapped out of her daydream and knelt beside her best-Lauren. What were they? Had something changed? This isn't the time to wonder.
"Hey, Lo." Camila wasn't sure if Lauren wanted to be touched or not, so she settled on placing her hand close to the older girls shoe. "It's okay. I don't mind. But, I don't have the answers, babe. Okay? He's a dick, it's what dicks do. They dick around."
Lauren giggled at the amount of times the innocent one of the group used the word dick. She nodded, moving her hand to lay on top of the smaller girls.
Camila ignored the feeling it gave her to have contact.
"Thank you, seriously." Lauren pulled her into a hug, which sends all kinds of feelings soaring around Camila's body.
-
The second time they kiss, they're in Camila's bunk listening to music at 3:30am.
It's been weeks and Lauren has made progress in her small depression.
They haven't talked much about what happened between them. Camila wanted it to be this sacred thing; her best friend stealing her first kiss. She liked the sound of it, and she didn't want to over analyze it too much.
But, she realized feelings for the older girl started to arise.
Could a kiss do that? She often thought. Just bring up feelings you didn't know you had? She's my best friend. This isn't the way it goes.
The fact that Lauren was a girl and prior to the kiss she was pretty certain she was straight, wasn't the thing that bothered her. It was the best friend thing.
She's watched the movies..
She knows how this turns out...
But, does Lauren feel the same?
They kiss because Lauren confessed that after she calmed down that day, she felt her lips and re-played that day's events in her head. She said it was nice and that she was sorry she had stolen her best friends' first kiss.
Camila laughed it off, careful not to wake the other girls.
They were on the road so they didn't have anything planned for tomorrow morning. It was a day to relax.
Camila had said that she's happy with how it made her feel and made sure to explain it as platonic as possible, saying she's glad it was with someone she loves and trusts and she says that if Lauren ever wanted to do it again, she wouldn't stop her.
So, this time Lauren shook her head in understanding, but it was dark so Camila couldn't see the girls reaction on her face.
"Do you want to kiss me again?" She had asked the older girl.
"Well I mean.." She cleared her throat. "I wouldn't be totally opposed to it.. You know.. For platonic, lonely purposes."
This made Camila laugh again, this time a bit too loud.
"Yo shuu thefuck up before I beatchyo ass.." Dinah mumbled in her sleep.
This caused the girls to cover their mouths.
But, Camila got serious again. "What's with the hesitation? Was I that bad?" She whispered jokingly.
"Uh..."
"What? Really? Okay well it was my first and you caught me off guard." She scuffed. "You weren't that great either." She lied.
Lauren snorted, turning to face the other girl. "Oh really?"
She took that as a challenge.
"Ohhhh Lauren.." She moaned, making kissing noises.
"Oh shut up, I didn't say your name." Camila smacked her arm, turning to face Lauren again.
She ignored the feeling in the bottom of her stomach to hear the other girl moan, even if it was for a joke.
"Nah but you liked it." Lauren pushed.
"Okay whatever so you're kindofagoodkisser.." She pushed out.
Lauren made a victory smirk but let her face shrink a little. "You know..." She started, using her left hand to draw pictures on Camila's arm. "I could always teach you.."
Camila felt a blush creep up her neck. Thank god, Lauren couldn't see her.
"I wouldn't be totally opposed-"
"Oh shut up." Lauren pushing her shoulder slightly interrupted her.
That's when Camila built up the courage and kissed her.
It was slow and better than the first time because she actually knew what was going on.
Lauren kissed her back without hesitation, bringing her hand up to the other girls' cheek.
She let Camila lead, giving the smaller girl the opportunity to explore this new territory.
Lauren would be lying if she said her stomach wasn't twisting with every stroke of Camila's tongue. She always liked kissing. In a way, she thought it was more intimate than sex.
"Close your eyes." Lauren mumbled against Camila's lips.
Camila hummed, closing them. Lauren just sighed a laugh and shook her head.
She was the first to pull away.
"How was that?" Camila asked, shuddering the words. She's nervous, no doubt.
"Fine." Lauren states.
Camila scuffs. "Just fine?"
"Well." Lauren sighs. "Let me show you." She moves her hand from Camila's face and climbs on top of her, one hand on the smaller girls' hipbone, the other directing one of her hands to her own hair.
Camila immediately took a handful and squeezed.
"Like that?" She whispered, everything fluttering from their new closeness.
Lauren didn't say anything, instead lacing her hand that wasn't on the other girls hip with Camila's free hand and locking it above their heads.
"Are you okay?" She asked the younger girl.
She nodded. "Yeah." Was all she could manage to say.
"Okay." Lauren smiled, dipping down and capturing Camila's lips in a passionate lip lock once again.
The third time they kissed lasted for all of 5 minutes before Lauren climbed off the younger girl saying she was tired.
Camila nodded and wished her a goodnight, watching as the older girl climbed out of her bunk and into the one across.
Neither girl slept that night.