*His Feeling*
Earl's POV
"Earl! Dito! Dali!", rinig kong sigaw nung apat habang kumakaway sa akin
Tsk.
Dali dali naman akong nagtatakbo habang hawak yung malaking bag ko papunta dun sa bus sa tapat nila.
Letche kasi. Hanggang ngayon wala padin akong alarm clock, nakakalimutan ko lagi kaya nakakalimutan ko rin gumising nang maaga. Buti nalang at mabilis ako kumilos.
5:00 am palang ngayon at sakto lang yung dating ko.
Kahit na bigat na bigat ako sa bag ko, nagawa ko parin namang tumakbo. Tsk. Hindi pa man din kami umaalis, haggard na ako.
"Ilagay mo na muna yung bag mo dun Earl", Joyce sabay turo doon sa isang pick-up kung saan marami naring bag ang nakalagay.
Nagmamadali naman akong pumunta doon.
Pagkalapit ko, nandoon din pala si Pearl, kasama si King. Itinataas na ni King yung mga gamit nila. Tsk.
Edi si Pearl na nga yung may katulong sa pagbubuhat ng bag. Tsk. Bakit nga ba kasi hindi ako nagpatulong dun sa apat.
Wag ka ngang pabebe Earl! Kaya mo naman eh.
Shut the hell up mind!
Tsk.
Well. Kung tutuusin, kaya ko naman tong bag, normal na sa akin, pakikipagbasag ulo nga kaya ko eh, ito pa ba? Nagtatakbo lang kasi ako kanina at nabigla ata ang balikat ko na pinagsasabitan ng bag kaya ang sakit nito ngayon.
Inalis ko na yung bag ko sa pagkakasabit sa balikat ko saka nagstretching.
Ang sakit! Litsi!
Pagtapos kong magstretch, kinuha ko yung bag ko sa tabi ko without a look kaya ganun nalang ang gulat ko nang hindi ko makapa. Napatingin ako sa lupa na pinaglapagan ko non pero dalawang pares na ng paa ang nakita ko. Inangat ko agad yung tingin ko at nakita ko si King na nilagay na pala yung bag ko sa pick-up. Nasa likod nya si Pearl at iritang nakatingin sakin.
"Salamat", I said coldly then nauna nang maglakad papunta sa bus, nakasunod naman sila dahil same lang naman ang bus namin.
I get myself inside the bus and sit beside AJ, dun kami sa pangalawa sa pinakadulo, doon kami sa dalawahan then yung tatlo doon syempre sa tatluhan sa tapat namin. Sa tapat ako ng bintana.
Kita ko naman yung mga KS at Fakers na pare-parehong dumiretso sa pinakadulo, dun sa mahabang upuan. Malaki tong bus kaya kasya silang sampu sa dulo. Ito kasing bus eh parang personal na pag-aari ng School. Malaki at para talaga sa isang section.
So alam nyo naman siguro kung para saan tong pag-alis namin diba?
"Dala mo yung tent?", tanong ko kay AJ sa tabi ko
"Yep!", she said saka nagpasak ng headset sa tainga nya.
Sya kasi yung pinagdala namin kasi meron naman sya, malaki at kasya kaming lima.
"Kumpleto na ba kayo 4-A?", tanong nung teacher namin sa TLE, Ma'am Oliver
"Yes Ma'am", our effective President
"Alright. Hey Manong, go na kayo", sabi nya kay manong driver matapos tapikin to sa balikat
"Safe trip class, check ko lang yung 4-B, ba-bye!"
"Bye Ma'am!"
Umandar na yung bus namin pagkababa ni Ma'am, nagpasak nalang din ako ng head phones sa tainga ko.
Matutulog nalang ako.
***
Ilang oras na ang byahe pero hindi parin ako dinadalaw ng antok. Nga pala, sinabi ko na bang sa Tagaytay kami pupunta, buti nalang talaga nakapagdala at may makapal kapal akong jacket na nakalkal sa closet ko kanina.
"Uy banggaan oh!", biglang sigaw nung itsusera naming kaklaseng lalaki, Jobert ata pangalan neto, lagi kasing nasusumbong na madaldal daw kaya naalala ko yung name
Because of curiosity (banggaan daw kasi) kaya napalingon ako, buti nalang tapat ako ng bintana kaya madali ko lang nakita yung kotse at motorbike na nagbangga nga, tsk tsk. Sayang ang motor, ganda pa naman.
I'm about to look away when I felt someone staring at me then out of I-don't-know I turned my look more to the right, specifically at my back, and there I saw King, staring at me, directly into my eyes.
I suddenly felt my heart beating so fast.
I immediately returned my gaize at my front. Tinitigan ko lang yung bakal na hawakan sa harap ko habang nakahawak dito yung kaliwa kong kamay habang yung kanan naman ay nakahawak sa bandang dibdib ko.
Hala! May sakit ata ako sa puso ah. Napapadalas na to ah. Tsk.
Ilang beses akong huminga ng malalim para kalmahin ang sarili ko.
"Oh Earl, are you okay?", AJ asked
"Yeah"
Ilang minuto pa ang lumipas at sa wakas ay nandito na kami sa Tagaytay.
"Wow!"
"Ang ganda naman"
"Mamulot tayo ng shells mamaya"
"I really love beach"
"Wah! Sayang wala akong dalang swim suit"
Iba't ibang komento ang naririnig ko galing sa mga istudyante dito pagkalabas nila ng bus. Tsk. Akala mo naman, sa bakasyon kami pumunta. Duh~ nandito kaya kami dahil may camping.
"Attention! Attention guys! Magpahinga muna daw kayo then iayos nyo na yung mga tent nyo, 4-A doon tayo", Ms. Pres. sabay turo doon sa side na pagtatayuan namin ng mga tents.
Pumunta naman kaming lahat doon. Yung iba nagpahinga, yung iba naman nagtuloy-tuloy na sa pagkabit ng mga tents nila.
Kami namang lima ay nagpahinga muna. Naglakad kami palapit sa seashore saka naupo doon. Medyo malayo kasi yung lugar ng mga tents namin sa dagat kaya nakapaglakad lakad pa kami.
"Ang ganda dito", nakangiting sabi ni Patrice
"Oo nga eh, picture tayo", yaya naman ni Eunice
Pumwesto naman kaming lima, buti nalang may dalang monopad itong si Eunice. Nagpicture lang kami dun kahit pare-pareho lang naman yung itsura namin, mga mukhang tuod.
"Ang fierce naman lahat, tara't ngumiti", yaya ulit nya
Pumwesto ulit kami, this time pare-pareho kaming mga nakangiti. True smile that we often to show.
***
King's POV
"Wow!"
We all looked at Troy na kanina pang kumukuha ng picture.
"Marunong naman pala silang ngumiti, bakit di nila ipakita?", I heard him whispered while looking at his DSLR camera
He's beside me so I heard him clearly.
"What's that tol?", Harvey asked curiously
"Here! Look at them", then Troy showed his camera to others
I'm getting curious.
"Wow! Is that them? Our ex PA's?"
I looked at them in just a second when I heard the 'PA' word.
So its about them?
"Wow! They all look gorgeous", Fin said
"Pati yung tomboy", he added
"Yeah! Why don't they smile more often?", Lem
I made myself more close to them to see the photo they are talking about.
I'm curious about their smiles, about her smile.
When I saw the photo, when I saw their smiles, her smile, I suddenly heard my heart beats.
Tsk.
This girl. She's always giving me this kind of feeling, even in just a small gestures. I always feel the excitement, happiness and.. love.
I don't know where and when it starts, its like I knew her for a long time, but for now, I am sure of what I'm feeling right now.
I zoomed in the photo and just stare at her picture while smiling. She's not really looking at this camera, but on them's. So this photo is like a stolen one.
I stare at her then I remember the first time we met, the second and the third and so on.
Flashback~
While busy looking for a 300ml chuckie drink here in the supermarket, my phone rang.
I took it and talked to my little sister, the real reason why I'm here. Tsk.
While talking to her, I felt someone staring at me so I get myself alert. But when I found her staring at me, I felt something I don't know.
When I caught her staring at me, she immediately looked the other way and got herself busy with the snacks, without her knowing that I'm still staring at her while talking to my lil' sis.
When Kate, my lil' sis, told me about her chuckie, I suddenly looked at her basket. There, I saw a big chuckie drink. I walked closely to her and talked to her, I also made her talked to Kate for the chuckie and she doubtfully gave me her big chuckie while I gave her a lot of small chuckies.
And then she left.
And I smiled
End of flashback~
I smiled when I remembered that thought. The first time I met her. I talked to her.
And then another thought came to my mind.
Flashback~
I actually don't want to ask her to do something. I don't want to command her but the other Stars might think something mallicious, so I made her clean my motor bike.
While she was busy cleaning my big bike, I didn't do anything but stare at her. She seemed to like my big bike.
But while cleaning it, the faucet had a problem. At first, I want to scream at the hose for ruining the moment. I want to stare at her even more. But when he called my name. It was like a music. I love it when she calls my name.
She seemed to need help so I helped her but the freaking water suddenly came out from the hose and made us wet. Another thing I want to curse but I refused to. Because, because of that, she teased me and talked to me. That time, I want to shout beacause of what they called 'kilig'.
End of flashback~
Yeah. Who said that a guy don't have the right to feel happy and excited because of love. Because of kilig. Tsk.
Yeah. I know. So gay, and really corny but that's how I feel and no one can blame me for that.
Tsk.
I'm just staring at the photo and then I look to where are they. She and her friends are now staring at the perfect view of the beach. Cold face but really beautiful. Tsk.
Earl, what exactly have you done to me? You even make me hate those guys that might link to you. Tsk.
Flashback~
"But he's handsome"
"What? N-nagagwapuhan ka dyan?"
"Oo"
"W-what! Huh? Gusto ko sanang magdiwang kasi first time kong narinig yang ganyan sayo, kaya lang kay Harvey? Oh c'mon Earl! You must be kidding me"
"Oh gosh! Tapos ngumingiti ka pa? OMG girls, anong nangyayari kay Earl?"
"Nothing is happening on me"
"Eh?"
"Is it wrong to have a crush on a guy?"
But when I heard that conversation. I balled my fist because of unexplainable anger and.. jealousy ?
That time, I really want to punch Harvey but I just showed my anger to the photographer who said that I wasted his time. Tsk.
End of flashback~
I really got jealous that time and I admit that. Tsk.
What can I do? That's what I felt.
Flashback~
The time of the soccer game. At the end of the game, when our PAs gave us a drink and ofcourse she's the one who gave me that but to my surprise, she also gave Masillanda a drink that definitely not her usual act.
That time, I already know I like her, so I felt again the eagerness to punch. I hate Masillanda that did caught her attention.
I commanded her to buy me again water even though I don't want to. I just want to get her attention. But we just fought, and to end that terrible (for me) conversation, I just left the field.
End of flashback~
After that scene, I realized that I'd been a quite childish, tsk. I regret that scene anyways.
I sit at the seashore. But then I saw the Queens. I remember the time when we saw them again after a long time.
Flashback~
When I received an email from Ice Queen, it was like I forgot all about Earl, the girl I like now.
We waited for them for about weeks. We believe to that email.
And when I received an email again, saying that they are just here, very much close. And the right time came, we met them, we talked to them, and finally we saw them, we saw how much they changed. Except for a very poker face.
And then, when once we arrived at room with the Queens, I caught her staring questioningly at me and when I take a look to her, I also turned away my gaize. I felt a quite guilty. I felt something, it was like I did something bad to her.
And I hate myself for that.
End of flashback~
I know I don't have the right to feel jealous, angry and guilt like we have relationship but d*mn! I can't help it.
I can't help it.
I really can't.
Flashback~
Riding at my big bike together with my co-gang---I mean, co-Kingdom Stars, we saw the Queens walking so we made them ride with us. Ice chose to ride with me and I did not say anything. Its actually okay with me but its just that, I somewhat want Earl only to ride with this motor with me.
While driving, another motor arrived in the road.
I don't have a plan to look at them when I heard a very familiar voice. I can't help myself from taking a look at her.
And when I looked at them, I saw her riding with another guy!
F*ck! Another anger I felt.
I don't know what happened to me that time. I just want to leave them to the point that I forgot Ice riding behind me.
But I assumed that she's into this so I didn't mind.
I just want to leave.
End of flashback~
"What are you thinking King?", Ice walked towards me
"Nah", then I smiled at her slightly
I don't know if it is just me or what but I can't feel the presence of a Gangster Queen to her. But maybe it is just really me, its been a long time, I'm sure it is just because they changed. Well actually they told us that, the reason why they leave is because they wanna change, they want to forget the past, they also said they sorry for leaving us without saying anything. But we forgave them already. We can't blame them that they want to leave their past life. It was really trouble, so half of me is agree that they did leave.
If they just continue that, it would just give them trouble and blood.
And speaking of blood..
Flashblack~
It was noon.
I saw her walking, way to the cafeteria.
I told KS to go their because I'm quite hungry.
Yeah. I'm a big liar.
To the way to the cafeteria, we saw Queens and they walked with us. As soon as I stepped to the caf. I find her. I walk towards the counter. It takes time before I walked to their place but as I walk closer to her, I noticed something wrong with her. She's finding something inside her pocket.
Then Fin or Troy, I forgot, saw something to the table.
A blood.
So in an instant, I knew something was wrong. I took her hand hiding under the table and asked her what happened?
Her friend told me and I immediately bring her to the clinic to clean her wound.
After that, she asked me something that I can't answer. I actually have the answer but my guts to talk left me.
D*mn this mouth! Tsk.
She left me and I regret it. It was actually my chance but I refused to use it. Tsk.
End of flashback~
"King! King! King!"
"H-huh?"
"I've been talking to you but you're spacing out. Tsk.", she's quite angry but remains her poker face.
"I'm sorry", I said
"Yeah right", then she stood up and walks towards her friends
I actually can't understand myself. I know to myself that I have feelings for her since then.
But now, when I saw her after a long time, I did not felt anything.
I'm just looking at IQ while she's busy on her friends from class C. It is actually nice that she have friends from the other section.
I'm just staring at IQ when I felt something hurts in my head. I turned my look at my back to know who the f*ck throwed me a stone. But when I looked at my back I saw her, I saw Earl. Looking at me coldly.
"Tsk"
And then she left me.
Ah.
What was that?