Jon stepped into the children's room feeling uncomfortable, confused and very irritated. How did he tell Ella that he wanted to leave? Why was her mother so abrasive towards him? He knew the answer to that one. She thought he was a gold digger. He shook his head.
Rich people.
He saw that Josh was still eating and the housekeeper was beside him, telling him a story about a grasshopper or something closely related.
He frowned. Where was Emma? Hadn't she said she was going to check on Josh? He walked up to the little boy. Josh looked at him and smiled a toothy smile.
"Hey buddy," he said with a small smile. He couldn't help it. Despite his foul mood, Josh's smile was contagious. "Did your mom come in here?"
He nodded. "Yeah. She's watching TV," he said and pointed towards a brown door behind them.
He ruffled the child's hair and went through the door.
The first thing he saw was the television, on which some cartoon was playing. He frowned. She watched cartoons? Adorable.
From where he was standing, he could only see the back of her head which was covered in wild brown curls. Her hair was one the best things about her. It was wild and soft and always smelled like raspberries.
He walked up to her and put his hands on her shoulders and leaned down to drop a kiss on her head. She jumped. She had obviously been lost in her world of cartoons and didn't hear him coming.
He smiled as she turned her face up to look at him. The smile froze on his face when he saw that her eyes were a faint red and they were shiny with tears. He rushed to go around the couch and sit next to her.
He cupped her chin in one hand and tried to make her look at him. She avoided making eye contact with him by looking everywhere but at him.
"Sweetheart," he said with a concerned frown, the endearment rolling easily off his tongue. "What's wrong?"
She finally looked up at him. A fresh set of tears started to fall from her eyes and she pressed her eyes together to try and stop it. His heart constricted. It had been obvious at the dinner table that there was animosity between her and Caleb, but he had expected anger and not tears.
She opened her mouth to speak, but only a sob came out. Jon put his arm around her and pulled her into his chest and felt the heavy sobs wracking her lean frame. For the umpteenth time that evening he had the barbaric urge to go out into the den and punch the living daylights out of the son of a bitch.
But he couldn't help wondering what had transpired between them to make her so sad. Another sob escaped her lips and Jon felt physical pain in his chest for her. He buried his face in her hair and rubbed her back in an effort to comfort her.
Just then, Josh burst into the room. "Mommy, I'm done eating," He said cheerfully as he ran into the room to stand in front of the couch.
When he saw that his mother's face was buried in Jon's chest, he stopped and frowned. Then he moved closer and lifted his little hands to pry her face away from his chest. Ella pulled away from Jon and sat up straight.
Josh peered at her with a concerned frown on his small face. "Mommy," He said, bouncing from one foot to another. "Are you crying?"
Ella nodded and pulled her son to her and held him tight. His face scrunched up as he struggled to get of her grasp. "Mommy. I can't breathe," he gasped. Ella loosened her hold on him but didn't let him go.
He tried to look at her face. "Did Uncle Caleb tell you another sad story?"
Jon was taken aback. He wanted to ask what Josh knew about Caleb, but it wasn't the right time nor was it his place. He suddenly felt protective towards the little boy.
Ella nodded again. "Yes baby," She said, her voice husky from all the crying. "His pet cat died."
"That's sad," Josh said. "Why can't Uncle Caleb keep his pets alive?"
"I don't know," Ella said. "He works a lot and he doesn't have time to take care of them."
"So why does he have pets?"Josh asked. Jon watched this exchange, not knowing what to make of it.
Yes, why indeed? Jon thought.
"Because he likes them."
"But he always kills them," the child said. "Why doesn't he leave them for people who won't kill them?"
"It's not always that easy, baby," Ella said to the small boy still wrapped in her arms. She looked at Jon and smiled a little sad smile at him. "I want to go home now."
Once again, Jon didn't have to be told twice. He looked at Josh. "Buddy, you wanna go say bye to Grandma and Grandpa?" he asked the little. Josh's face lit up and he struggled out of Emma's grasp and ran out of the room.
"Hey," he said to Emma.
"Hello," she said with a sheepish smile. "I'm sorry about this." she pointed towards her face.
"Hey," he said softly. "There's nothing to be sorry about."
She sniffled, wiping away the remaining tears from her eyes. The small gesture made Jon's heart ache for her. "Emma, I wish you could tell me what's going on," he said in a soft tone. He was trying not to scare her off. He felt like she was a bird, and any sudden movements would send her running. He really wanted to be there for her, to hear her worries and hold her against his chest and tell her that it would all be fine
"I can't, Jon. It's too soon," she said in a thick voice.
He wanted to press further but he decided to respect her wishes. He pulled her against his chest and kissed the top of her head once again. She put her arms around his waist and held onto him tightly.
"I just want you to know that I'm here for you." Jon said. "Whenever you're willing to talk, I'll be here baby."
"Thank you," she said into his chest. "You just being here means the world to me."
They stayed this way for a few more minutes before Josh came bounding into the room and told them that he was ready to go home.
****
Jude paused in front of Jasmine's door and took in a deep breath to steady himself. One deep breath was not nearly enough, he took about five before his chest started to feel like it was closing up. His chest started rising and falling as he struggled to breathe.
Don't have a panic attack right now, man. He warned himself.
He was feeling a large range of emotions at the moment. From confusion to anger to regret to sadness to fear. He was so very scared. What did he say to Jasmine when she opened her door looking all beautiful and sad?
He was angry at her. He was so breathtakingly angry at her. He had been head over heels for her and his world had crashed around him when she had told him that she had been with his best friend. How could she have? While he had been working and suffering and counting the days till the day he would finally be able to leave and go to her and be there for her. He had even sent his best friend in his stead so that she wouldn't feel so lonely.
Needless to say, that had been the greatest mistake of his life.
His anger had faded a little when his father had died. He had finally understood the kind of pain she must have been feeling. He realized that his pain must have been only about one-third of hers seeing as her father had been the only family she had had.
He took a final steadying breath and raised his hand to the door and knocked. He listened but he didn't hear any sound so he knocked again.
"Coming!" He heard her sing from the other side of the door. He heard her footsteps moving closer to the door and he braced himself.
She opened the door with a wide smile on her face. Until she saw him, then the smile fell off her face quickly and Jude felt like he was the guy who stole Christmas. Apart from a huge scowl, she was wearing a pair of black shorts with a red tank top and her lovely auburn hair was up in a messy bun with a few strands hanging down the sides of her face. Her face was free of makeup so her pale creamy skin and freckles were on full display.
"Why are you here again, Jude?" she asked, her voice full of exasperation.
"I came to speak with you," Jude said through gritted teeth. He was seriously fighting the urge to yell at her.
"What about this time? Calling me a desperate slut wasn't enough?" she questioned.
"How could you, Jazz?" he suddenly burst out.
"We've been over this before, Jude," she said tiredly. She was still standing in her doorway, making it obvious that she was not inviting him inside. "I was lonely and sad and I made a huge mistake."
"I don't care about that anymore, Red," Jude said in a very low voice. It was the voice he used when he needed to intimidate people. "I'm talking about the fact that you knew that you were carrying my baby and you didn't see the need to let me know."
Jasmine gasped, her cheeks turning bright red. Just then, a middle aged lady climbed up the stairs. She turned and cast them an odd glance before she continued climbing the stairs.
Jasmine made a small sound before she wrapped one small hand around his fist and pulled him into her apartment and locked the door. Then, she finally looked up at him and he saw that her eyes were starting to fill up with tears.
"How did you know about the baby?" she asked and Jude heard that her voice had become thicker with emotion.
"That's not what's important at the moment, Jasmine," he said through gritted teeth. He was conflicted. On the one hand, he wanted to shout and yell at her. On the other, her expression made him want to pull her into his chest and wipe her tears away.
"Don't speak to me in that tone, you bastard!" she said, shaking with fury. "When was I supposed to tell you? When?" She wiped at her eyes furiously. "You were never there. You couldn't even stay on the line long enough for me to ask how you were doing?"
"Oh, don't start with that again," Jude fired back. "There were so many ways in which you could have told me that you were pregnant."
"How, Jude? Text message? Email?" She yelled, her arms moving wildly to convey just how angry she was. "And what would you have done then? You would have abandoned all your responsibilities and come rushing to my side?" she asked, raising her eyebrows. She didn't even bother wiping the tears that were falling freely now.
"You know that I would have!"
He watched as a huge sob escaped her lips. She looked up at him with eyes filled to the brim with tears. "Then why couldn't you have done that for me when my father died? Why couldn't you have been there for me when I needed you the most?" She forced out just before her knees buckled.
Jude darted forward and put an arm around her waist and pulled her against him. The sobs that wracked her body were violent. Jude felt like a bastard for being the cause of her pain. She stayed there for a short moment before she pushed away from him, looking up at him with eyes that burned with anger.
"Don't touch me with those filthy hands of yours," she said.
Jude felt something inside him explode. How dare she talk to him like he was the bastard in this situation. He stalked towards her and she stood her ground, not moving an inch. "You have no right, Jasmine. All I'm guilty of is working myself like an animal so I could finish the project I was working on and come home to be with you for as long as you needed me. I'm not the one who slept with the first person who was nice to me. I'm not the one who forgot to tell her boyfriend that she was pregnant with his child."
He stopped talking suddenly as a new thought occurred to him. "I mean, was it even my child?"
Jasmine gasped and with all the strength she had, she slapped him across the cheek.
"I can't believe you would say that to me." she said.
He scowled at her, ignoring the dull pain in his cheek where she had slapped him. "You say you were grieving. My father died recently but I didn't get the urge to betray someone I love."
"That's because you're cold, Jude," Jasmine replied coldly. "Your heart is a block of ice and you're incapable of love."
"I'm cold? Incapable of love?" he laughed humorlessly. "Was I cold with you? Was I incapable of love with you? Answer me!" he shouted. She just stared back at him, her eyes wide.
"Of course you have no answer. That's because you know that the love I felt for you, the love that I still fucking feel for you, is white hot, Jasmine. Even in this moment, as I am so angry at you, I want nothing more than to pull you to me and ease your fears," he said harshly. "Then pull you into that bedroom of yours and take off your clothes and make you mine again, in the basest of ways possible," he finished, his chest moving up and down quickly.
She just stared up at him with something that looked like fear in her eyes. He realized that he had just told her that he loved her. He hadn't even know that. His mouth had realized before his brain.
"You know, I should get going," he said and turned in the direction of the door.
"Jude wait!" she said urgently and grabbed on to his arm. He turned and gave her a curious look. "I'm really and truly sorry for everything that I did," she said sincerely. "I'm so angry at the way you treated me, but it doesn't change the fact that I regret everything that I did."
Jude felt his face soften at the apology that she offered. She had taken the high road and been the bigger person. He looked at her beautiful pale face and her eyes, bloodshot and full of tears, the tears still running down her face and he felt his anger dissipate instantly. He never wanted to see her beautiful face marred by sadness again.
He took both her hands in his and looked into her eyes. "Jasmine, I'm sorry too. I'm still mad at you, but I was an asshole. I should have explained the work situation to you."
"Yes, you should have," she said and all of a sudden, her lips curved into a smile.
Her smile was so beautiful that he couldn't help smiling back. It felt weird to smile. He hadn't had much cause in the past few years to smile. He looked at her pink pouty kips and he knew that he wanted to kiss them. He leaned in to do just that, but he felt a restricting hand on his chest pushing him back.
"It's too soon, Jude," Jasmine said. He pulled back and nodded, she was right.
"I should be on my way, Red," he said. "I'll see you soon."
****
Oh wow, that was intense. I was literally breathing heavily as I wrote this. :)
What did you think about the chapter? Do you like my little diversion from the main story? Drop me a comment.
Vote if you liked it.
Don't worry, we'll get back to Ella and Jon's story shortly.
Ciao.