Dedicated to chooseitwisely cause it was her birthday not long ago.
Okay, it has been so long since I uploaded that I feel soooo bad but there are lots of things going on in my life right now.
However, I uploaded this massively gigantic chapter to hopefully make up for it. Sorry for the wait!
Enjoy!!!!
Chapter Twenty-One
“I’m so sorry,” I whispered as I tugged the shoelace tight around Law’s wrists, wrapping the thin material around his fingers in a way that if he tried too hard to escape, he would break his thumb.
“Stop apologizing to them,” Tally said, sending me a glare as he listened at the door to see if anyone was coming.
“I just feel really bad,” I mumbled, frowning at Reed and Law who were back to back with their hands tied by their own shoelaces. “Reed’s not really a bad guy.”
Tally raised an eyebrow at me. “He kidnapped you from your school with the express purpose of interrogating you and he brought along a guy who’s well known for his less than gentle methods of questioning and you think he’s ‘not a bad guy’?” He shook his head. “That’s one powerful drug.”
I snapped my mouth shut, trying to ignore my urge to give more excuses for Reed’s behaviour. My eyes traveled over Tally who was once again leaning his ear against the door. He was wearing Law’s military outfit and even though it was big on him, somehow it made him seem manlier, making his shoulders broader and the hat on his head somehow made him look so…sexy.
“…if we can’t make it?”
“Hm?” I asked, swallowing hard as my pulse sped up and my skin started to heat. I bit my lip, standing slowly, not minding my heels so much anymore and leaning my back against the wall, taking a deep breath as my eyes strayed over Tally’s torso.
“What’s wrong with you now? You’re sweating,” he said, his dark blue eyes narrowing at me, suddenly looking seductive and I took an unconscious step towards him.
“We need to get out of here,” I said, my voice raspy as part of me realized my attraction to Tally was another side effect of the Oxytocin but damn, the boy looked fine in a uniform. “Like now,” I said, my chest rising and falling rapidly.
“You’re all flushed,” he said, his eyes lighting with concern as he took a step towards me.
“Stay back!” I shouted, flinging my hands out and taking a step towards him, contradicting my words. Hastily, I retreated, planting my back against the wall once more, tearing my gaze away from him. “It’s the drug, I’m just a little…warm.” Hot. I was hot and so was Tally. Super hot. Irresistible. Why wasn’t he an actor? He could make millions off of his looks. I groaned at my ridiculous thoughts and ran a hand over my face, trying to concentrate. “Let’s go,” I said, pushing off the wall and heading towards him, making my heart race wildly in my chest. I giggled lightly when I stood beside him, loving that he was taller than me.
“Did you just giggle?” he asked, frowning down at me.
“Maybe,” I said, batting my lashes at him and sending him a flirty smile before I wiped the look off my face, wincing inwardly at my actions. “Let’s go.”
“Wait, we should go over the plan one more time,” he said, placing his hand on the door and leaning a little closer to me. I swallowed as his dark blue eyes stared into my soul.
“Wow,” I whispered, my eyes widening as I looked up at him.
“Jade?” Tally said, his voice a little husky as his gaze shot to my lips for a second.
I blinked, realizing the position we were in. “No more going over the plan. We open the door, we act casual. I’m your prisoner and if anyone stops us, we run. Try not to use your gun if you can help it,” I said quickly, moving my gaze from his and turning my back to him, linking my wrists together behind me and waiting for him to hold my arms back.
He grabbed my wrists and the contact sent tingles up and down my arm, making my heart race even more than it already had been. “Ready?” He asked and I nodded furiously, needing to get out of there immediately before I did something incredibly stupid, like jump Tally.
He pushed open the door and shoved me into motion as we both kept our heads down, walking swiftly but calmly through the base. My heart rate remained calm for the whole walk until we were almost at the door. I glanced up and noticed that there weren’t too many people milling around and I felt a satisfied grin stretch my lips as we walked out the door without attracting any attention.
I spotted the van that we’d arrived in ahead of us and a smirk stretched my mouth. “I’m driving,” I said.
“Why does that sound kind of scary?” Tally mumbled as we got closer and closer to the dark vehicle.
“Hey!” someone shouted from behind us.
“Keep moving,” I hissed.
“Well I wasn’t going to stop to chat,” he hissed back, hurrying his steps a little. We were about 25 meters away and I could hear the crunch of gravel behind us as at least two people followed us.
“You two! Stop!” a man’s voice said and I felt my smile widen as their footsteps became quicker.
“Run!” I shouted, breaking out of Tally’s grip and using my arms to propel me forward quickly, my heart beating hard as adrenaline surged through my blood stream. We reached the van quickly and thankfully the doors were unlocked. I jumped into the driver’s seat and reached beneath the steering wheel, yanking on the chords there until they poked further out. Swiftly, I located the right ones and used my teeth to pull back the plastic casing before brushing the delicate wires together, causing sparks to light and the engine to roar to life.
“Jade,” Tally said as I straightened in my seat. He was staring straight ahead at five guys in military uniforms who had their guns trained on the van.
“They probably won’t kill us,” I said firmly, pressing my foot down on the gas and revving the engine threateningly.
“Get out of the car!” one of them shouted and my smile widened as I revved the engine again.
“Jade, they’re going to shoot at us for sure.”
“This van is probably bullet proof.”
“Stop saying probably!” he hissed, his eyes fixed nervously on the guys as they started to circle the van.
“Let’s go!” I shouted, laughter bubbling out of my lips as I gunned the engine, heading straight at the guys as their bullets pinged off the van. “Told you it was bullet proof!” I shouted, sending a delighted glance his way as the guys flung themselves to the side, the van whooshing past them, speeding up quickly. I continued to laugh as we bounced down the dirt road at a reckless pace. I pushed the gas pedal down further, sending the speedometer needle further to the right, making my grin widen.
“You’re crazy,” Tally said and when I glanced over at him, he was looking at me with wide eyes, his face pale.
“Stop being such a chicken!” I shouted, holding the wheel in one hand as our rear end fishtailed slightly, making us travel sideways on the dirt road before I straightened us.
“We’re going to die,” he muttered, reaching for his seatbelt and fastening it firmly.
I just laughed as I drove, keeping the speed way too high for a dirt road. “Incoming,” I said, glancing in the side mirror, noticing two sleek cars behind us, traveling just as fast as me as we pulled off the dirt path and onto a small, paved road. I honked as I cut in front of a station wagon, the driver sending me the finger as I waved at him through the tinted windows. “Let’s lose them!”
“Oh god,” Tally said, gripping his seat belt until his knuckles were white.
My eyes narrowed on the traffic in front of us, ignoring Tally as I saw a hand reach out the window of the closest car, a gun in the person’s grip. I swerved to the side suddenly, going into the opposite lane as a transport headed towards us. I put the gas pedal to the floor, lurching forward as we passed a minivan, swerving back into our lane just as the transport ripped past us, honking furiously. The car had stayed behind the minivan and I didn’t let up on the pedal at all, pushing the van to its limits as I weaved in and out of traffic, laughing sporadically whenever I had a particularly close call with another vehicle. Some part of me knew I was driving like a totally maniac but the drugged up part of me was saying that there was no reason to be afraid as I took the exit onto the highway so fast that the van tilted precariously before settling firmly on all four wheels again.
“My life just flashed before my eyes,” Tally said, his voice breathless and his eyes wide as he stared at the windshield with unseeing eyes.
“Sorry,” I mumbled as I continued to weave in and out of traffic. Unfortunately there were more lanes here and the two cars were catching up fast. Without thinking about it too much, I swerved across the small patch of grass separating the north and southbound lanes.
“What the hell are you doing!?” Tally shouted as I dodged the oncoming traffic, moving across three lanes to avoid getting hit. “Never again,” he muttered, looking at his lap. “If we live through this, never again will I let you drive anywhere. This shit isn’t right.”
I ignored him and concentrated on weaving the large vehicle around the other cars until I spotted a ramp, glancing to the side, I noticed that our tail was still following us but they were still on the other side of the highway, going in the same direction as the traffic. I smirked, seeing the barrier between the lanes widen up ahead and with one last jerk of the wheel, I swerved, making the van spin quickly before racing across the three lanes to take the nearest on ramp as soon as the barrier became too high to see the other cars. I slowed down slightly, now going the same direction as traffic and a wide grin stretched across my face. “We did it!” I shouted, glancing over at Tally who was staring at me in horror. “What?”
He just shook his head, his skin incredibly pale as he loosened his death grip on his seatbelt slightly, looking out the windshield as we drove at a more normal pace through a small town. “What the hell was in that drug? Please don’t tell me that’s how you drive normally.”
I blinked and shrugged, wanting to share all the information I knew with him. “Well, in high enough doses, it makes you really trusting of people you know and very distrusting of people you don’t. In some cases, it brings out a person’s protective instincts and it can give you a sense of fearlessness.” I cleared my throat, glancing over at Tally with a slight red tinge to my cheeks. “It can also increase sexual awareness,” I mumbled.
He raised an eyebrow at me, his mouth curving into a smirk. “Oh really?”
“Yeah,” I muttered, facing forward resolutely, trying not to notice the way his dark blue eyes went a shade darker when he looked at me.
“So you think I’m hot?”
I swallowed and rolled my eyes, trying to act nonchalant. “Only because I’m on drugs. Don’t feel too flattered.”
“Ouch,” he muttered, facing forward again. “Now what?” he asked after a moment of awkward silence.
“We need to get back to town but we can’t drive this car anymore,” I said, frowning down at the stolen vehicle.
“Why not?”
I raised an eyebrow at him, ignoring the way my skin warmed at the sight of him. “It’s stolen.”
“Oh yeah. Well, it’s not like they didn’t deserve it. They kidnapped us.”
“We both got into the van willingly enough,” I said, pulling onto a small dirt road, driving for a short distance before stopping. I gripped the door handle and yanked, jumping out of the vehicle smoothly, landing in my heels with ease.
“I meant to ask you about that,” Tally said, stepping out of his side of the vehicle. “Why did you get into a vehicle with a guy who essentially held you prisoner for three weeks?”
I shook my head walking away from the van towards the busier street with Tally beside me. “It’s complicated. Reed and I have a history and I guess a part of me was hoping that he wasn’t going to betray me again.”
“How’d that work out for you?”
I sent him a glare before focusing on the gravel in front of us. “Reed is a very focused man. Things are starting to come together for him professionally and he doesn’t want anything jeopardizing that.” My eyes lost some of their focus as I thought of the information I’d managed to obtain about the others like me. “Besides, it kind of backfired for him anyway. There are things I know about the kids like me that I didn’t know before.”
“What are you talking about?”
I squeezed my mouth shut, sending Tally a wary look. “Are you questioning me because you know I’m drugged up?”
“Yes.”
“Oh. I appreciate your honesty. Tally, you’re such a good friend.”
Suddenly Tally stopped and gripped my arm, tugging me until I was facing him. I went along with it easily, trusting him implicitly even though I probably shouldn’t. He tugged me closer to him, wrapping his arms around me and bringing his face closer to mine. “I remember a time when we weren’t just friends, Jade,” he said huskily, his eyes moving down to my lips before meeting my gaze once again.
I shrugged, feeling my heart rate jump from being so close to him. “That was just for show. I needed to get Jackson away from me because I was worried about him. I’m always worried about him because I love him.”
Tally’s grip on me tightened for a second as hurt and anger flashed in his dark blue eyes. After a beat, he sighed and rolled his eyes, releasing me to walk by my side again. “Even with a powerful drug coursing through your system, all you can think about is him?”
I shrugged, moving along. “I thought about you for a second but I also thought that the guy in the car chasing us looked kind of hot with his aviator sun glasses and receding hair line. It doesn’t change the fact that I’m a one man woman.” I felt a stupid grin stretch across my face as I thought of Jackson. “He told me he loves me today.”
Tally snorted. “Like that wasn’t obvious?”
My head whipped to the side, my wide eyes on Tally’s angry profile. “You thought it was obvious? Why, did he say something to you?”
“He didn’t have to,” he grumbled, running a hand through his hair. “I’ll admit that when Jackson first came here, the football team was really hard on him and I played a big role in that. It was stupid but for some reason I got caught up in it and Jackson just pissed me off but he never seemed to really care until you came into the picture. Now whenever we walk by each other in the hallways, he gives me threatening looks and I’m pretty sure that he’s going to kill me for going with you today.”
“No he won’t, I’ll protect you,” I said, my voice dreamy as I thought about Jackson and his thick dark hair and piercing grey eyes. “He’s so hot,” I mumbled, lost in my fantasy world.
“Spare me,” Tally groaned, as we turned onto the shoulder of the paved road.
My heart skipped a beat when my phone rang in the pocket of my leather jacket and I had a pretty good idea of who it might be. When I dug it out, my suspicions were confirmed and I winced, noticing that it was already past lunch time. “Hello?”
“Jade, where are you? Did you get held up in─” The sound of a passing transport drowned out the rest of his question and when it was gone, there was silence on the other end of the phone line. “Where are you?” he asked finally, his voice a little deeper this time and there was tension in it too, like he was restraining himself from yelling.
“Somewhere off of highway 41,” I replied, my voice strong as the drug urged me to tell him everything he wanted to know.
It was silent again and I bit my lip, worried about what he was going to say next. “How did you get there?”
“Reed brought me,” I said without hesitation.
“Reed brought you?”
“Yeah. He came to school this morning and I didn’t want to tell you because I was afraid that you would come with me and get hurt.”
“So you went alone?” Jackson’s voice was so low that it was a growl now.
“No. Tally’s with me.” There was no reply for so long that I pulled the phone away from my ear, wondering if I’d lost the signal. “Jackson?” I asked, when I realized that we were still connected.
“I’m coming to get you. Stay where you are.”
“Okay, see you soon,” I said, feeling a grin spread across my face as I gave him better directions before hanging up the phone and placing it back in my pocket.
“What are you so happy about?” Tally asked, giving me a strange look.
I grinned at him, punching him lightly on the shoulder. “Because I get to see Jackson soon, obviously.”
Tally just shook his head at me and gave me a smirk. “I don’t think it’s going to be the happy reunion you’re imagining.”
A slight frown tugged at my forehead as I thought about his words and part of me registered what he was saying as true. I’d heard the anger in Jackson’s voice clearly enough but my excitement was overriding my trepidation at the moment.
“How long does that drug last?” he asked, frowning down at me in concern.
I shrugged, giving him a reassuring smile. “It depends on the dosage and I think they gave me a pretty high one, so probably a few more hours. It’s not such a big deal. I’ve been exposed to worse drugs than this one.”
“Your life is so weird,” he said as he moved towards the guard rail and sat on the paved shoulder of the road.
“What are you doing?”
“Waiting. Isn’t Ryder coming to pick us up?”
“Yeah,” I said, looking down the road longingly, wanting to run until my legs couldn’t run anymore. I wanted to close any distance between Jackson and me as quickly as possible. Finally, I sighed and sank to the pavement beside Tally, fidgeting with the hem of my shirt and twitching my legs as we waited.
After about twenty minutes, Jackson’s rusty old car pulled up and I leapt from my seated position, grinning widely as I moved towards the car. He didn’t get out. He just gestured to the back seat and when I leaned down a little further to frown at him, I saw Grant in the passenger side. I waved at him wildly, flinging my arm back and forth in a wide arc until Tally gripped it and dragged me into the back seat.
“Hi guys! Thanks for coming to get us, we were totally stranded!” I said as I strapped on my seatbelt and we started to move. I leaned forward, tilting my head so I could look at Jackson. My eyes were close to his jaw and I felt my grin stretch as I looked at the starting of a beard there. “Jackson, I missed you.” A muscle twitched in his jaw but he didn’t respond. My smile faltered for a second but it widened again as my gaze landed on his long, dark lashes framing his silver eyes that were staring straight ahead. “Jackson, there’s something I have to tell you,” I said, my voice sounding kind of winded from the excitement coursing through my veins.
“How about you start with telling us what the hell happened today?” Grant asked, pushing on my shoulder and sending my back against the seat. I frowned at the back of Jackson’s head, wanting to tell him that I loved him but as my gaze traveled to Grant, my smile returned.
“Grant! You know what Grant? I’m so glad you came here! I’m so glad that you go to the same school as me and that we’re good friends. It really means a lot to me, I just want you to know that.”
He raised an eyebrow at me, sending a questioning look to Tally who just shrugged before moving his gaze back to me. “Um, ditto. So, what happened to you guys? Where did Reed take you?”
“Well, he took us to this barn that was basically a military base. It was totally weird, Grant because not only were Reed’s men there, but there were military personnel too. It seems like they’ve formed some sort of alliance to find the others like me because they’re taking all of Reed’s business and if they’re messing with the military too.” I shook my head, thinking about it. “I wonder what their plan is. Why are they bothering with all of this if they’re making no money from it? Why did they band together like they have unless they have an ultimate reason?” I shrugged and frowned over at the driver. “Jackson? Are you okay? You haven’t said anything since we spoke on the phone.
No response.
“Are you giving me the silent treatment? Are you that mad at me that you can’t even talk to me?” His eyes met mine in the cracked rear view mirror for a second and a chill went down my spine at the flat grey colour that revealed nothing. “Jackson,” I whispered, feeling my heart clench in pain as he focused ahead of him once more.
“Just drop it for now, Jade,” Grant said softly, casting a wary glance towards Jackson before giving me a stern look. “He has a right to be angry. You should’ve told someone where you were going. What if something had happened to you?”
I swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat as a tear slid down my cheek. “I know I was wrong,” I croaked as more tears started to fall. “There wasn’t time to tell anyone and well, a part of me wanted to believe that Reed was still the man I remembered. He used to buy me Christmas presents, you know. Besides, if I would’ve told Jackson, he could have…” I let out a choked sob, wiping at my eyes with the back of my hand as the tears continued to flow. “He could’ve been hurt because of me. He could’ve died because of me.”
“Are you crying?” Grant asked, his eyebrows raised high.
“They gave her some kind of drug. Oxytollen or something.”
“Oxytocin,” I said, smiling encouragingly over at Tally for nearly getting it right.
“Really?” Grant said, looking at me with narrowed eyes. “How did they deliver it?”
“Nasal spray,” I said, grinning at him, happy to provide him with information.
“Was it a strong dose?”
I nodded eagerly.
His eyes slid over to Tally and narrowed further. “Did anything happen between the two of you?”
Jackson’s shoulders stiffened at the question and he sent a quick look over to Grant before focusing on the road again.
“Maybe,” Tally said smugly, crossing his arms over his chest.
The car swerved slightly, the tires hitting the dirt on the side of the road before Jackson righted to vehicle, placing it back between the lines.
“Sorry,” Jackson said quietly, his voice strained as he sent me an icy glare through the rear view mirror.
“He’s lying!” I shouted, trying to sit forward but my seatbelt locked and held me in place. I gripped the restraint, forgetting my tears as I sent Tally a glare of my own. “Why are you lying? I thought we were friends?”
“I said maybe, not yes,” Tally grumbled, grinning at Jackson, whose grip on the steering wheel tightened, making his knuckles turn white.
“Nothing happened, I swear. I just thought that he looked kind of cute in a military uniform and he leaned sort of close to me just before we escaped and then there was that moment on the side of the road where─”
“Stop!” Jackson shouted, the material of the steering wheel letting out a groan as his grip tightened further. I looked in the mirror again but his eyes were focused on the road in front of him. “Grant, tell me what that drug does.”
“Okay but Jade?”
“Yeah?”
“I suggest you keep your mouth shut until that stuff’s out of your system.”
I looked at Jackson’s stiff shoulders and the vein that was throbbing in his neck before saying. “That sounds like a good idea.”
Grant nodded and shifted so that he was facing Jackson. “The drug is used as an alternative to traditional truth serum but the only problem with it is that you need to know the interrogator in order for it to be affective. It induces a strong sense of trust in those that you already know and a strong sense of distrust in those that you don’t know. It can cause a sense of fearlessness, euphoria or an increase in protective instincts and it’s also quite effective at increasing sexual drive in women.” Grant sent me a quick look with his eyebrow raised before he focused on Jackson again. “When administered in low doses, the side effects are minimal but because it was given as a nasal spray and judging by Jade’s behaviour, I’m thinking her dose was pretty high.”
“Is that it?” Jackson asked in his strained voice and I had to bite my lip to keep from trying to draw him into conversation.
“Pretty much,” Grant said as we took an off ramp and headed towards the school.
Jackson just gave a short nod and the rest of the car ride passed in silence.
We all piled out of the car once we’d parked at the school and I couldn’t help but stare at Jackson as he avoided my gaze. I kept opening my mouth and closing it, wanting to talk to him but the part of my brain that was still functioning was afraid that I would say the wrong thing.
“You can’t tell anyone about what happened to you, Tally, you got that?” Grant said, giving Tally’s shoulder a tight squeeze.
Tally shrugged him off and glared at Grant. “I’m not an idiot.” Tally shifted his gaze over to me and gave me a little salute. “Thanks for saving my ass today, Jade, even though it wouldn’t have needed saving if I hadn’t climbed into that van in the first place but still, thanks. I’ll see you later.”
I sent him a little wave, still feeling sad because Jackson wasn’t talking to me. I watched Tally until he was in the school and when I turned to face Jackson, he was looking down at me with his glacial stare. “I’m sorry,” I whispered and fire joined the ice in his gaze as his lips thinned.
“Are you really?” he asked, his voice low but steady as he spoke.
I stared up at him, frowning as I looked at his familiar features that I loved so much. “No,” I said quietly, knowing it was the wrong thing to say even though it was the truth.
Jackson turned away from me and slammed his palm down on the roof of his car, leaving a little dent there.
“Ryder,” Grant said, coming around the vehicle to put a hand on Jackson’s shoulder. Jackson just turned a glare in Grant’s direction, making the other boy release his hold but he didn’t move back. “It’s not fair to question her right now. There’s a very powerful drug working its way through her system and her defences are low. Just give her some time, okay?”
Jackson let out a humourless laugh and spun so that he was facing me, his eyes fixed on mine. “Why? So she can lie to me again? So she has time to come up with an excuse for why she doesn’t trust me enough to tell me when she’s doing something that could get her killed?”
“Hey,” Grant said, shoving Jackson’s shoulder until the two guys were glaring at each other. My heart was beating like crazy in my chest as my eyes locked on Jackson’s strong features that were stark with anger before sliding down to his impressive chest that was rising and falling rapidly, straining against the fabric of his t-shirt. I bit my lip, feeling my own breathing pick up speed as my hands itched to touch him. “She’s just trying to protect you, Ryder. I can understand why she got into that van even if you can’t. She’s been looking for information for weeks now and if Reed could help her find some, then of course she would take the risk. Logically, he probably wasn’t going to kill her because of their past so after weighing the pros and cons, so she got into the van.”
Jackson pushed on Grant’s chest, making him stumble back a step as anger flared in his eyes. “She told me she’d let me be involved in all of this but she lied. At the first sign of danger, she went out of her way to protect me while I was once again left wondering what had happened to her.” He shook his head, running a frustrated hand through his thick hair before swinging his gaze over to me. “I don’t know how many times I have to tell you, Jade, I can’t go through that again. I won’t stand by while you go off and get yourself killed and I thought you understood that.”
“I do understa─”
“Obviously you don’t,” he said, cutting me off as he strode towards me and gripped my arms, his cold eyes making any desire I was feeling evaporate. “You walked into that school with me, knowing that you were going to walk back out and talk to Reed but you looked me in the eye and talked to me just like it was any other day. You have the skills to do that kind of thing but I don’t. I need you to tell me when something like this happens and today just proves to me that you won’t.” He tilted his head back and closed his eyes, letting go of me as he took a step back.
“Ryder, now really isn’t the time to say this. Any criticism is going to feel so much worse to her right now because of the Oxytocin,” Grant said quietly, his voice calm and smooth as he spoke.
Jackson ignored him. “Are you going to tell me next time something like this happens? If this situation were to occur again, would you willingly involve me?”
I frowned, looking into his cold eyes as I thought about the answer. “I don’t know. Probably not,” I said quietly, feeling my heart clench painfully as he looked away from me and took another step back.
“That’s what I thought,” he said quietly, looking at the gravel at his feet.
“You guys should talk about this later. We’ll figure everything out later, okay?” Grant said, moving so that he was standing between the two of us but kind of to the side so he wasn’t blocking our view of each other, like a referee.
Jackson looked up at me and there was determination in his eyes when his gaze connected with mine again. “I feel like a burden,” he said quietly, his voice laced with disgust and pain. “I feel like you’ll never trust me enough to fully include me in everything that’s going on with you.”
“You’re not a burden,” I said quietly, my heart clenching painfully at the hurt in his eyes. “And I do trust you Jackson, I trust you more than I’ve trusted anyone since my mother di-died.” I cleared, my throat trying to get rid of the lump that had reappeared.
“If that were true, then you would’ve told me where you were going this morning. You would’ve let me help you.” I opened my mouth to respond but my stomach was clenching in pain and my throat felt constricted like something was blocking my windpipe. “Maybe we should stop seeing each other.”
The world tilted for a second and my mouth snapped shut, clicking my teeth together painfully as my stomach lurched with more force. I felt like I was freefalling and the ground was coming fast. My eyes lost focus for a second and my heart went strangely numb. I looked Jackson in the eye, the world around us fading until there was nothing but the two of us. “Okay,” I said quietly, my voice wobbling slightly as I spoke. His eyes widened a little and hurt flashed across them before I tore my gaze from his and turned around, heading for the sidewalk.
“Jade wait! I’ll drive you,” Grant shouted and I heard his footsteps in the gravel as he came closer to me.
“No!” I said loudly and firmly, making his footsteps stop a few feet away. “I’m walking. Please don’t follow me.”
I continued forward and this time, no one followed me.
My eyes wouldn’t focus on anything and I still had that numb feeling in my chest. I placed my fingers at my throat just to see if I had a pulse and found that it was racing much more quickly than usual. “Huh,” I croaked, letting my arm drop back to my side as I walked along, my heels clicking against the sidewalk. I didn’t even wince as a blister developed and the shoe rubbed it painfully. I just kept moving along, vaguely noticing that everything looked like it was underwater. There was no definition to the leaves on the trees and the cars seemed to be traveling so fast that my eyes couldn’t catch them.
My stomach clenched as I walked past some hedges and I leaned over to puke in the bush.
“Hey!” someone shouted and I blinked when I saw a man in his fifties standing in front of me with a pair of pruning shears in his hand. “You just puked in my hedge.”
I reached out quickly and pinched his neck, making him crumble to the pavement in front of me, out cold. I stepped over him and continued on my way, not really knowing where I was going until I was standing in front of my house.
I blinked at the front of the building, wondering for the first time why everything seemed to be moving in front of my eyes. My stomach turned and clenched again and I put my arm across it, willing myself not to puke. I fumbled along the door frame for the hide-a-key and my sweaty fingers struggled to grip the small piece of metal as I fitted it in the lock and twisted, slamming my shoulder into the door which was already open, making the it fly back and slam into the wall, making a hole.
“Crap,” I muttered, closing the door and inspecting the damage but the hole in the drywall was moving around and no matter how many times I blinked, it wouldn’t stay still. I stood up straight and stumbled slightly, nearly twisting an ankle as I tripped over the other shoes scattered across the floor. I stepped out of my heels and noted that my gait wasn’t any steadier without them which made me frown until my stomach clenched again and I had to rush into the washroom, releasing the contents of my stomach once more. I groaned and flushed the toilet before standing up to rinse my mouth out. I swiped my hand across my forehead and it came back covered in sweat. I tried to focus on my reflection and I looked like I’d just run a marathon. My cheeks were red and my hair was sticking to my face, my chest was rising and falling rapidly and my eyes were unfocused. I pushed away from the sink, stumbling out of the bathroom and making my way up the stairs, gripping the railing for support the whole way.
When I made it to my room, I collapsed onto my bed and rolled into the fetal position as my stomach clenched painfully and I began to shiver uncontrollably. I squeezed my eyes shut, a part of my brain telling me that this was a side effect of the drug they’d given me but I just couldn’t find the energy to care. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I let it ring, finding it too hard to remove my arms from around my knees to answer it. It rang again and I let it go but when it rang the third time, I finally summoned the strength to reach into my pocket and grab my phone.
I didn’t say anything, just pressed the answer button and placed the phone against my ear.
“Jade?” Jackson said, his voice making shock waves go through me as I remembered his words.
“I can’t talk right now,” I croaked, my stomach clenching painfully.
“Please, Jade, we need to talk this out. What I said in the parking lot─”
“Don’t!” I shouted but my voice came out much weaker than I’d expected. “Please don’t say it again.”
He didn’t say anything for a while and my teeth started to chatter, my body feeling icy cold even as beads of sweat covered my skin. “What’s that noise?”
“C-c-cold. I’m c-cold, J-Jackson.”
“Jade?” His voice was loud in my ear and I heard the panic in it. “Jade, what’s going on? Where are you?”
“Home,” I whispered, crunching my legs closer to my chest, seeking heat. “Jackson?” I said into the phone but there was only a beeping noise, telling me that he’d hung up. “Jackson,” I said into the receiver. “I d-d-don’t w-want to b-break up. I d-didn’t even kn-know we were d-dating.”
“Jade.”
I blinked, a frown wrinkling my brow as the loud beeping from the disconnected call still rang in my head but somehow I’d heard Jackson’s voice.
Suddenly he was there, his face hovering over mine, concern written all over his features.
“J-Jackson? How did you get here?”
“I was outside your house when I called you. What’s going on? Why are you like this? Is it the drug?”
I nodded, my wide eyes focused on him as my teeth continued to chatter.
“I should call Grant,” he said, taking the phone from my limp fingers.
“It’s okay,” I said quietly. “It’s just like the f-flu. In most cases the symptoms aren’t d-deadly and there’s n-n-nothing you can do to c-counteract it a-anyway.”
“The flu?” he asked, glaring down at me as I shivered violently. “This isn’t the flu,” he said, putting my phone on the table beside my bed before slipping his arms underneath me and lifting me up, manoeuvring me until I was underneath the blankets before he picked up my phone again and dialled Grant’s number.
“She’s sick!” he shouted into the phone, pacing beside my bed, glancing down at me as he spoke. “What do I do?” He paused as he listened and his eyes lit with anger. “It’s not the flu damn it! Her skin is pale and blotchy and she’s covered in sweat but she’s shivering so much that she can’t even talk.” He paused again then he reached out to touch the skin at my neck. I winced, knowing that it was sweaty but he just frowned and looked elsewhere, concentrated on my pulse. “It’s really fast,” he said into the phone, focusing on me again with worried eyes. The same eyes that had been so flat and cold just a short while earlier.
It was weird to know that my pulse was racing when I couldn’t feel my heart beating at all. The numbness that had settled there hadn’t gone away.
“Okay,” he said into the phone, his eyes still focused on me and I couldn’t seem to tear my gaze away even though his image was swimming a little, every once in a while I’d get a clear view of his beautiful silver eyes and for that moment, some of the numbness seemed to disappear. “Okay, just hurry up, all right?” He hung up and before I could react, he was gone. I don’t know how much time passed but when he returned, I was shaking more violently than I had been before, the blankets covering me felt like nothing and my teeth were slamming so hard together that I wouldn’t be surprised if they chipped. I thought I saw a flash of panic in his eyes before his arms slipped beneath me again and he lifted me out from under the blanket, making cold air rush across my skin.
I moaned but didn’t say anything as we made our way into the bathroom which was filled with steam. Jackson set me down on my feet, keeping his arms around me for support as he leaned me against the sink. “You need to take a bath,” he said, his voice shaking a little as he spoke.
“I-I can do it,” I whispered, pushing on his chest weakly. He took a small step back and gradually released his hold on me until my knees buckled and I began to collapse. His arms tightened around me again and he boosted me up until I was sitting on the vanity, knocking over the toothbrush cup and the soap dish.
“No you can’t,” he growled, pulling off my jacket before reaching for the hem of my shirt. “I’m sorry Jade, but you need to get in the water,” he said softly, lifting my shirt over my head and pulling it off. I looked away from him, feeling vulnerable as I sat there in my bra and a pair of leggings. He wrapped one arm around me and pulled me off the counter. I held my head back, not wanting my cheek to touch his chest as he used his free hand to tug down my leggings, exposing my plain white underwear before he placed me back on the counter and tugged the leggings off. His eyes were focused on mine as he lifted me princess style again and gently lowered me into the water.
I hissed as I settled into the hot water, my skin tingling uncomfortably as my teeth continued to chatter.
“Is it too hot?” Jackson asked, kneeling beside the tub, dipping his hand into the water and frowning at me. “Grant said it needed to be hot.”
“It’s fine,” I whispered, clenching my teeth together as a wave of nausea attacked me. I groaned and shifted my gaze around the room, looking for something to puke in. “I need a bucket.”
Immediately, Jackson handed me a small, empty garbage can and before I could thank him, I was puking into it. I leaned back weakly when I was finished and Jackson dumped the contents of the garbage can down the toilet. He knelt at the side of the tub again and looked at me with his brow furrowed, not saying anything as he watched me. I couldn’t meet his eyes. The numbness in my heart was starting to go away and it was being replaced by a horrible tearing pain that made me feel like I was coming apart at the seams. If I looked at his eyes all I could hear was his voice telling me that we shouldn’t see each other anymore and just the thought of it sent fresh bolts of pain into my heart which I now realized was racing.
“You’re not shivering anymore,” Jackson said, his voice filled with relief as a slight smile curved his lips upward.
I shifted my head to the side, squeezing my eyes shut and letting out a small whimper, my heart clenching at the sight of his soft smile. “You should go,” I whispered, my voice sounding broken to my own ears.
“I’m not leaving, Jade.”
“Please Jackson, it’s hard enough without…I can’t see you right now. It’s okay if you want to…break up but please, give me some time. You really…” I felt a sob work its up my throat and I tried to keep my lips sealed but it still managed to burst through as tears leaked from the corners of my closed eyes. “You really mean a lot to me but I understand why you can’t be with me. I just need some time, okay?” Inside, I knew that time wasn’t going to do anything. Inside, I was already planning how I was going to break the news to Richard and Holly that I was leaving.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he said quietly, his voice catching slightly as his hands landed on my cheeks, shifting my head until I was facing him. I kept my eyes closed though as the feel of his skin on mine made me tingle. “Open your eyes, Jade.”
“No,” I sobbed.
“Okay, then listen to me. What I said in the parking lot, I didn’t mean it. I was worried and angry and hurt and I wasn’t thinking which is why I drove here to talk to you. I love you, Jade and I don’t want to break up with you so please stop crying,” he said, his fingers brushing under my eyes, taking the tears away. “I’m sorry, Jade. I’m so sorry, I should’ve never said that.”
His eyes were filled with uncertainty as he looked down at me and I felt my heart clench, knowing that he was telling the truth even though breaking up would probably be the right thing to do for Jackson’s sake. “You’d be better off without me,” I said quietly.
“No, I wouldn’t,” he answered, leaning in to kiss me lightly on the forehead.
“Knock knock,” Grant said from the doorway and when I shifted my gaze over to him, his eyebrow was raised and there was a knowing smirk on his face.
“Get out,” Jackson growled, standing quickly to push Grant away from the doorway and out of sight.
“I didn’t see anything, I swear,” Grant said before I heard a grunt. “Jeez, Jackson, I thought you guys broke up.”
There was another grunt and then Jackson said, “We worked it out.” I heard their footsteps fade into my room then Jackson came back and placed some clothes by the sink. “The water’s getting cold. Are you ready to come out?” he asked, standing next to the tub and looking down at me with a frown on his face.
“Okay,” I said quietly, my head starting to ache a little bit but at least I wasn’t cold anymore and my nausea had gone away. I sat up and gripped the edges of the tub but before I could stand, Jackson had his hands under my arms and he was hauling me out of the tub. “I could’ve done that,” I said breathlessly when my feet were on the floor and Jackson’s grey shirt was soaked. His arms shifted so that they were holding me a little more tightly and I tried to push back but my arms were weak. “You’re clothes are getting wet.”
“It’s fine,” he said but he loosened his hold a little and wrapped me in a towel, never fully letting me go which was probably good because I was a little shaky on my legs. “I brought you a change of clothes. Do you think you can manage to change your bra and underwear?”
I blinked up at him, feeling my cheeks heat as I nodded quickly, shifting until I was leaning against the sink. “Okay, turn around,” I said, gripping his wrists and pulling his arms away from me.
He moved slowly, his hands heating my skin as his palms moved from their spot at the small of my back to the sides where he paused for a moment before slowly letting me go. “You good?” he asked, his voice husky and when I looked at him, his eyes were a little glazed over.
“Yeah,” I said, my voice coming out hoarse but at least I could blame it on the puking. He nodded but didn’t take his eyes off me as I opened the towel. “Turn around,” I said and he spun quickly mumbling a quick apology. I smiled slightly as I focused on replacing my wet underwear. I was definitely unsteady on my feet but I managed to do it while Jackson continuously asked me if I was okay. I breathed a sigh of relief when I was done and straightened. “Okay, I’m done,” I said as a shiver ran down my spine.
“You’re getting cold,” he said, unfolding the clothes on the counter quickly. “Raise your hands,” he said quietly, focused on his task as he helped me get dressed. When I was fully clothed, my temperature felt a lot higher and my heart beat was racing wildly but this time, I didn’t think it was a side effect of the drugs. “Come on, let’s get you to bed,” he said, crouching so that he could place his arm beneath my legs to lift me.
“Wait!” I said and he straightened. “I want to brush my teeth first,” I said, wincing at the bad taste in my mouth.
He nodded and spun me around, keeping his arms around me as I put the toothpaste on the brush and placed it in my mouth. Our eyes met in the mirror and I watched as he lowered his head and placed a kiss on my cheek before moving a little further down to place one on my neck, making my breath hitch and my knees go a little weak. I felt his lips stretch into a grin against my skin as he kissed me again and my heart skipped a beat.
His eyes connected with mine again in the mirror, their silver depths dancing as he jerked his head to indicate the tooth brush that I was barely gripping. “Brush your teeth,” he said, his voice husky as he smirked at me.
I narrowed my eyes at him but I started the brush moving again, trying to focus on my task as he shifted to the other side of my neck and kissed a path upward until he planted a kiss at the corner of my eye. I felt a smile tug at my lips before I bent to spit out the tooth paste and rinsed my mouth out, his arms still around me. “Done,” I said softly and before I could blink, my feet were off the ground and I was snuggled against his chest.
“Finally,” Grant muttered, standing from my bed when Jackson and I entered the room. He placed me on the bed gently, his arms slowing moving away from my body that was now clothed in multiple layers of sweaters and sweat pants.
“Are you cold?” Jackson asked, as he pulled four huge blankets over me.
I felt a shiver run through me and I frowned at the pile of blankets on top of me, wondering why they weren’t giving me warmth. “Just a bit,” I said quietly and Jackson frowned before looking over to Grant.
“Is that normal?” Grant leaned forward and placed his hand on my forehead before dragging it down towards my neck and resting the back of it beneath my jaw and above my collarbone. “You’d better have a good reason for touching her like that,” Jackson said, his voice low and Grant had a smirk on his face when he turned towards him.
“I’m checking her temperature,” Grant said, pulling his hand away and yanking the blankets up a little more. His smirk disappeared as he looked down at me. “It’s pretty high actually. Do you still feel nauseous?” I shook my head and he nodded before leaning back towards me and placing his fingers against the pulse at my throat. “Your heart rate is accelerated. You’re going to have to watch that,” he said to Jackson who nodded.
“Shouldn’t we give her something? Would flu medication help?”
“No, the symptoms are flu like but it isn’t the flu. She just needs to ride it out but considering the severity of her reaction, you have to watch her carefully. If her heart rate starts beating too fast, try to get her to breathe deeply and slowly or else she could go into cardiac arrest.”
“We should go to the hospital, right now,” Jackson said, his eyes clouding over as he moved so that he was square to the bed, ready to lift me up again.
“Jackson,” Grant said, putting a halting hand on his shoulder. “Hospitals tend to ask about things like high doses of oxytocin and half healed bullet wounds.”
“I don’t care,” Jackson growled, trying to get Grant’s hand off his shoulder.
“She should be fine as long as you keep an eye on her. From what you told me, she’s already improving. Just keep her warm and monitor her heart rate, okay?”
Jackson just looked down at me for a while, his grey eyes troubled. “Okay,” he said finally, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Thanks for coming, Grant.”
“No problem,” Grant replied, turning to me and giving me a serious look. “Listen Jade, about today, I know why you went with Reed alone even though you had the chance to let someone know. It’s how we operate. Assassins are every man for themselves and we don’t trust easily but things are different now. You have people that care about you and people who are willing to back you up so next time, let someone know, okay?”
“Okay,” I said quietly, giving him a small smile before he nodded at Jackson and left my room, closing the door behind him. Jackson just stared down at me for a while, his eyes worried and his forehead wrinkled before he reached down and grabbed the hem of his wet shirt, pulling it over his head and throwing it into a heap on the floor. “W-what are you doing?” I asked, my eyes dropping to his chest and moving down to his abs before traveling up again and settling on his knowing eyes.
“I’m taking off my clothes,” he said, reaching for the snap on his jeans.
“Why?” I squeaked as he pulled the zipper down and worked the material over his hips and down his legs, revealed a pair of black boxer shorts that showed off his defined legs, muscled from running all the time. My breathing was picking up as I stared at him at I felt my heart rate ratchet up.
“Close your eyes!” he shouted, his voice firm and I immediately complied, squeezing my eyes shut, feeling my heart rate immediately slow down. “Was that because of me?” he asked and I heard a slightly smug tone in his voice.
I scowled at him, keeping my eyes closed. “No,” I muttered.
“You’re lying,” he said as I heard his steps move around the bed, stopping on the other side. “Are you going to have a heart attack if I get into bed with you?” he asked, trying to make it sound like a joke but there was a seriousness to his tone that he couldn’t hide.
“I don’t think so,” I said quietly as the blankets lifted and he slid under, making the mattress dip as his weight settled in next to me.
“Let me know if your heart rate goes up,” he said, shifting closer to me. I turned over so that I was on my side, facing him and I finally opened my eyes to see his silver ones narrowed with concern. “Maybe you should keep your eyes closed,” he said softly as he wound his arm around my waist and tugged me closer, putting his other arm beneath my head.
“No,” I said quietly, settling my head on his arm comfortably as his heat seeped into my bones, banishing the shivers I was still feeling and I let out a soft sigh, my eyes drifting halfway closed.
He shifted until he was holding my wrist with the hand that wasn’t under my head and placed his fingers across my pulse. “It seems okay,” he said, releasing my wrist and frowning down at me.
“Hey Jackson?”
“Yeah?”
“I really am sorry about today. I should’ve told you but I was afraid that you would insist on coming with me and then you would’ve been in danger because of me.”
“I know,” he said softly, brushing my hair off my face.
“No, you don’t know,” I said, looking him square in the eye. “My mother died in front of me, Jackson and it was horrible. She was the only person in the whole world that I loved and now that I have you, I’m afraid it’s going to happen again and this time, it’s going to be entirely my fault.”
“I’m making a choice here, Jade. I’m here with you, knowing the risks and even though I’m still angry that you didn’t tell me today, I’m hoping that soon, you’ll trust me enough to let me know when something like that happens again.”
I felt a lump rise in my throat and my hands that were resting on his chest shifted so that they were wrapped around him. I held him tightly and nuzzled my head up under his chin, squeezing my eyes shut. “I trust you, Jackson. I know that you’d be there for me and that you’d be able to help me if I ever asked you too. This isn’t a question of your ability. I just…I can’t lose you,” I said in a broken voice, squeezing him even tighter.
“Jade,” Jackson whispered, his voice cracking slightly as he tightened his arms around me until we were completely smashed together. I winced slightly as my still healing bullet wound gave a twinge of pain but I ignored it and didn’t move, my weak arms shaking from using what little strength I still had in them. “It’s not fair. You can’t ask me to stand on the sidelines and watch. I can’t lose you either and I can’t handle waiting for news about whether you’re dead or alive.” He sighed and pulled back slightly until he was looking me in the eye. His lips shifted into a small smile and his hand moved to brush across my cheek lightly, making my heart rate pick up a bit. “I’m just going to have to stick closer to you from now on. That way, you’ll have no choice but to tell me when something goes wrong, okay?”
I just looked at him for a while, my eyes traveling over his familiar features until finally, I nodded. “I’ll try to think of how I’d feel if the roles were reversed but I can’t promise you that if the same situation from this morning happened again, I would tell you. That’s the best I can do for now, Jackson and I understand if it’s not enough.”
Slowly, I began to pull my arms away from him, giving him space to make a decision but he shifted suddenly, causing me to roll onto my back as his body landed half on top of me, one arm underneath me and the other arm supporting his weight next to my head. I looked up at him wide eyed as he stared down at me with a slight smile on his face. “It’s enough for now, Jade,” he whispered, bringing his face closer to mine until his lips were slanted across my mouth, his tongue running across my bottom lip until I opened for him, letting out a small moan as my arms gripped him more firmly once more, running over his strong back greedily.
“Jade! Are you in here? I’m going to kill you and Jackson for leaving without me…holy shit.”
I blinked up at Jackson who was staring down at me in confusion before both of us shifted our gazes to the doorway to see my sister standing there with a hand clapped over her eyes. “Abby,” I said quietly, before I took noticed the position that Jackson and I were in, realizing that from her point of view, all she could really see was a shirtless Jackson on top of me as we made out. “It’s not what you think,” I said hastily, pushing on Jackson’s chest until he rolled over but he didn’t move so far that he wasn’t touching me.
“I sleep in that bed,” she said in a whiny voice as she shifted her fingers to peak through them. “Jade, that’s so gross, couldn’t you go to his house?”
“Abby, we weren’t doing anything,” I said, trying to sit up but Jackson pushed me back down before pulling the blankets back up to my chin.
“Jade’s sick,” he said firmly, looking at my sister steadily as he spoke.
“She is?” Abby asked, lowering her hand and giving me a concerned look. “Are you okay? You seemed fine this morning,” she said, moving slightly closer to the bed, her eyes shifting over to where Jackson was now sitting up with his back against the headboard, his bare chest clearly visible. She swallowed and her eyes widened as her gaze ran over his form.
“Hey!” I shouted in a hoarse voice. “Don’t look at him like that, Abby!”
“Sorry,” she mumbled, swinging her gaze back to mine but stealing a couple quick glances at him at the same time. “Wow,” she whispered before her eyes resolutely focused on my scowling face. “What do you have? What are you sick with?” Abby asked, coming closer to me and placing her hand on my forehead. “You have a fever,” she said, quietly, frowning down at me. “You’re really pale, Jade, do you want me to get you some medicine?”
“No,” I said, giving her a reassuring smile. “I think I just need to rest and I’ll be fine soon.”
She nodded, her gaze traveling over the bed as she cocked her head to the side and placed a hand on her hip. “Where am I going to sleep?”
I don’t know how she did it, but Abby convinced my parents to let Jackson sleep over that night. It helped that he put on some clothes, borrowing a t-shirt and sweats from Shaun’s room. Abby had rolled out a sleeping bag and grumbled the entire time as she settled onto the floor beside the bed but shortly after her head hit the pillow, she was asleep.
I slept too, and at first, it was a peaceful, dreamless sleep but soon the dreams came. Dreams of Lemon and his twisted smile as he pointed a gun at my sister and then he’d be lying in a pool of his own blood, staring up at me with accusing eyes as he said the word killer over and over again. “Stop fighting it, Jade,” he whispered as the light died in his eyes and his head lolled to the side.
I frowned down at the gun in my hands, its weight much heavier than usual, my hand shaking from the effort of even carrying the weapon.
“Jade,” Reed said, walking towards me with a smile on his face and warmth in his eyes. It was a look I remembered from my childhood. Whenever my mother and I would return home from a mission, he had that look on his face, like a father happy to see his daughter after a long time.
Without hesitation, I raised my hand, the gun feeling light once more as the barrel pointed straight at his heart.
“Jade,” Reed said again, his steps faltering and his smile fading as he gave me a hurt and confused look. “What are you doing?”
“What you raised me to do,” I said and pulled the trigger.
I woke up biting my lip so hard that I’d punctured the skin. Jackson’s arms were looped loosely around me but after a quick inspection, I noticed that he was still asleep. My heart was beating like crazy and all the blankets on top of me suddenly felt suffocating. I shifted slowly until I was out of Jackson’s arms and my feet were dangling over the side of the bed. I ran a shaking hand through my hair, feeling my clammy palm brush against my forehead. I tried to take slow, calming breaths but my heart rate wouldn’t go down. I put a hand to my chest and pressed firmly, hoping that it would help as I continued to suck in ragged breaths of air.
Suddenly, Jackson was behind me, his legs on either side of me and his arms wrapped around me. “Breathe with me, Jade,” he said quietly, pulling me back against him as he breathed deeply.
I matched my breathing to him as he whispered in my ear, telling me random stories about school or his dad until finally, my heart was beating at a safer rate. “Thanks,” I whispered, my head resting against his shoulder as his arms tightened around me.
“No problem,” he said quietly in my ear.
My eyes shifted to the bedside table when my phone lit up and buzzed against the wood. I frowned down at it, reaching out quickly to grab it, not recognizing the number on the caller ID. “It’s four in the morning,” Jackson said as he looked down at my phone.
I accepted the call and placed it to my ear, opening my mouth to give a greeting but the person on the other line spoke first. “How are your dreams lately, Jade?” A female voice asked, her tone friendly and sweet but her words sent a bolt of panic through me.
“Who is this?” I asked, my voice calm and smooth even though I wasn’t feeling so calm at the moment.
“Oh, I think you can figure that out for yourself,” she said breezily. “Do you dream about killing him, Jade?”
“Which one are you?” I whispered, my voice betraying some of the excitement and panic I was feeling.
She didn’t say anything for a bit. “You’re rusty, Jade. I could hear the emotion in your voice. Living that boring, normal life of yours is really starting to take its toll. It’ll all come back to you quickly though. It’s like riding a bike. And don’t worry about those nasty dreams. Your guilt will fade soon and your second kill will be easier. The problem with you is that you’re fighting it. We’re creatures of instinct, Jade. We do as we were trained to do and you and I, we were trained to kill.”
“I’m not a killer,” I said firmly, clenching my hand into a fist on my lap, my other hand tightening on the phone.
She tsked at me before letting out a short laugh that lacked any real humour. “Don’t be silly. You killed the man responsible for all of us. The man who turned perfectly normal kids into well oiled killing machines. You know, some of the crew isn’t happy about that, Jade. Some of them wanted so desperately to kill him themselves but somehow, a silly thing like you beat them to it. I personally don’t mind. As long as he’s dead, I’m happy so I guess what I’m trying to say is, congratulations.”
“Why did you call me?” I hissed into the phone.
“Jeez, someone’s grumpy. All right, I’ll get to the point then. Basically, we’re recruiting and Jade, we want you.”