Everything was going fine, or at least that's what Hoseok thought. He'd always been nervous by dates, even if he had been on quite a few before with Yoongi, seeing as they'd been together for years. Which was another point Hoseok wanted to make when trying to convince himself it was okay to be nervous; he'd spent years with Yoongi, four actually, it was their anniversary.
Hoseok had never been one for fancy restaurants and dressing up, so he'd planned to take Yoongi to the place they had their first date – the mall food court. Romantic, he knows. But when told the news Yoongi practically lit up like a Christmas tree and kissed Hoseok all over his face with a fervor that he'd not seen in a while. Hoseok just assumed Yoongi really liked shitty mall food court cheeseburgers.
Hoseok sat across from Yoongi, nervously picking apart a napkin. Like before, Hoseok knew he had no reason to be nervous, but there were so many things that could possibly go wrong. He could drop all their food, or bump into a table and send it toppling, or choke on a french fry and die a horrible, greasy death. The possibilities were endless.
Yoongi was in the middle of ranting about work when it happened. He was angrily dipping his fries into ketchup and biting them equally as viciously when Hoseok noticed that throughout his spiel, Yoongi had been double dipping his french fries. Not only was it disgusting, but it went against every table manner his mother had ever enforced on him. Hoseok cut off Yoongi's rant with a horrified gasp that had Yoongi looking at him with wide eyes and hands ready to preform cpr.
"What, what's wrong?" Yoongi asked, shuffling his chair around the table to sit next to Hoseok. He beat the heel of his hand against Hoseok's back a few times before the younger boy broke out of his horror induced shock and looked at him.
"You double dipped," Hoseok said, pointing mortified at the ketchup canister. Hoseok himself double dipped sometimes, but only when he was alone, using his own sauces. This time around Yoongi and Hoseok were sharing the ketchup because Yoongi had insisted that it would be cute and coupley. Hoseok never would have agreed had he known Yoongi planned to defile the sauce with his regurgitated fry.
Yoongi started laughing and it was Hoseok's turn to beat on his back to ensure he didn't choke on his food. Yoongi leant his head on Hoseok's shoulder, still laughing and holding his stomach. Hoseok rubbed his back all the while, watching as Yoongi rubbed tears away from his eyes.
"Are you serious? Oh my god, you're serious." Yoongi broke into another fit of giggles, his warm breath fanning over Hoseok's face. Hoseok had the mind to flick him on the ear for laughing at him, but instead watched as Yoongi erupted into a laughing mess, leaning on Hoseok for support.
"I don't know why you're laughing, it's gross. We're sharing that ketchup, in case you forgot, and I don't appreciate your chewed up fry contaminating my dipping sauce." Hoseok said. He pushed the ketchup away from him, as if it was physically hurting him to have it so close.
"Hoseokie," Yoongi started in a tone that told Hoseok he was about to make fun of him. Hoseok looked at Yoongi out of the corner of his eye, and saw that Yoongi was grinning back at him. "You've literally had your tongue in my ass and you're grossed out by my double dipping? That doesn't seem quite right."
"Yoongi!" Hoseok screeched, thumping Yoongi on the chest with the back of his hand. A blush was spreading rapidly from the base of his neck to the tips only his ears, and Yoongi's erratic laughing wasn't helping the situation. Hoseok glanced around and was met with a few disgusted glares from mothers, holding their hands over their children's ears. Hoseok hid his face in his hands and shook his head. "I hate you so much, I hate you so so much."
"Aw, you love me." Yoongi said, wrapping himself around Hoseok's body as best he could while still sitting in his seat.
"I don't really," Hoseok said, face still hid away. He could feel Yoongi shifting in his chair but ignored him, turning his face away from him slightly.
"Hoseok, Hoseok, Hoseokie," Yoongi muttered in his ear, pressing his body against his side. Hoseok could only imagine how the mother's were looking at them now. He hoped they'd left, Yoongi wasn't shy when it came to public displays of affection. Hoseok felt Yoongi's breath on his ear and he shivered slightly. "Daddy."
"No," Hoseok said, scooting away from Yoongi automatically. "No, absolutely not. We are in public."
Yoongi pouted and moved his chair closer to Hoseok again and practically crawled into his lap. Hoseok turned away from him and stared at their discarded food, thinking of anything and everything to distract him from his boyfriend pressing his knee against his crotch.
"Daddy," Yoongi repeated, voice somewhere between a whine and a knowing rasp. Hoseok glared at him, breathing sharply through his nose.
"Can't we do anything without you trying to get me worked up in public?" Hoseok asked, already moving to throw away their food. Yoongi smiled triumphantly when Hoseok grabbed his arm and started dragging him towards the exit. Sometimes you'd think that Yoongi was younger than Hoseok by the way he acted. Other times you'd wonder why Hoseok was dating such a grandpa. "You do these things on purpose."
"You love me." Yoongi said, leaving a chaste kiss on the back of Hoseok's neck.
"Sadly," Hoseok muttered.