7: Stumbling
'He hung up on me.' The disbelief dripped from my voice like a bad taste.
Laina's eyes grew wide with surprise, and then, almost hesitantly, she put an arm around me. 'That wanker. That bloody wanker!' She frowned and gave me a squeeze, but a laugh of hers was hidden in her voice as she suggested, 'How about we just get a civil partnership then, and I father this jelly baby? I hope you realise that having two parents of the same gender is all the rage right now.'
I laughed, but couldn't hide the disappointment that flooded through me and made my heart sink to the ground and curl up.
I didn't know what I had been expecting but it sure as hell hadn't been this.
'It's-' My sentence was cut off by the sound of my ringtone going off, my wide eyes matching Laina's, our gazes snapping to the phone that lay on my coffee table, now lit up with Drew's name.
'Shit,' we both whispered at the same time.
'Answer it quick!' Laina encouraged, grabbing it and pressing the answer button herself, practically slamming it against my ear when I made no move towards it.
'Er, hello?' I said, my voice sound more like a squeak rather than that of an actual human being.
'Hey, it's me. Sorry about that, my reception was really bad so I had to move and the phone cut off but now I've called you back and... yeah.' Drew was rambling, and I knew that he was nervous now.
'Did you hear what I said though?' I asked softly, biting my lip and holding the phone up myself, Laina pointing to her arm that was straining and miming agony.
I imagined Drew nodding on the other end, glancing at the clock and realising that it would've been around lunchtime-ish for him in LA or wherever it was. I wondered what he was doing - whether he was sitting down or standing up or pacing the room like I wanted to do but couldn't.
'I think so,' he replied gently. 'How long have you known?'
I paused, before admitting, 'Before we went out for coffee. About a month after Mia's wedding was when I realised something was up and I took a test, actually, so I've known for about a month.'
He exhaled. 'A while, then. Why didn't you tell me?' He didn't sound angry, which was a relief.
'I-' I sighed. 'I was scared. I didn't know if I was going to keep the baby or what my mum and dad will think. But I am. I'm keeping the baby, and I suppose I'm telling you because you have a right to him or her because obviously, you know... you're the baby daddy, as Laina likes to refer to you.'
Laina grinned and gave me the thumbs up, before continuing to listen intently to what he was saying on the other end of the line.
'Good.' Drew said, the hint of a smile back in his voice. 'Look Nova, I'm back in England in two days time. Do you mind if I come and see you? We've er, obviously got a lot to talk about.'
'Yeah. Yes. We do. We really do.'
*
Two days later couldn't come around fast enough, but Laina and I spent those couple of days slobbing around, with her taking time off work to keep me company. Hilariously, Laina worked at a matchmaking service, and I teased her relentlessly about her essentially being the bridge leading to doing the dirty for many, many people.
I was sat on my laptop catching up on crappy TV when the doorbell rang and I practically peed myself, having finally managed to divert my thoughts from Drew and the jelly baby after shooing Laina out of my front door like the green sheep she was less than five minutes earlier.
I had tried to look moderately human, but it seemed that all of my clothes had decided to become too tight to be decent all at once. I had learnt one important thing though as of late though: pregnant people lied. Honestly, bigger bullshitters could not exist.
They went on and on about pregnancy making you feel great and glow, when all it was doing was making me fat and feel like I was slowly but surely turning into a whale.
Because of what I liked to think of as the proper Problem of Evil (i.e. pregnancy making you balloon), I was stuck wearing tank tops and hoodies - resulting in me looking like a supreme chav and the tank top only putting emphasis on the fact that I was desperately in need of new bras, since 'le puppies' were spilling out of them so badly.
He was going to think I was dressed like this on purpose. Bloody brilliant.
I tentatively stepped towards the door, quickly and nervously running a hand through my now mostly dry hair that fell in its natural brown waves. It may have been running along the same train of thoughts as a twelve year old, but I sincerely hoped that Drew liked the citrusy scent of my shower stuff.
God, I was so lame.
'Hello,' Drew said, surprisingly looking calm and collected, a stark contrast to the internal panic attack I was having.
'You okay?' he asked, to which I nodded, saying, 'Yep,' quickly.
Things were awkward suddenly in a way that they had never been before.
'Are you?' I questioned.
'Yeah,' Drew responded. He was still standing in the doorway in a sweater and dark jeans, his hands in the pockets of them. His hair had grown a bit and become a little curly at the ends. It suited him, making him look younger and a little less like a perfect and polished actor man. I liked it.
'You're certainly looking more than okay,' I said on a whim, before groaning and internally hanging myself.
A smile finally tugged at Drew's mouth and it curved upwards into his easy smile that I realised now was the thing missing.
'At least that has you smiling,' I murmured, gesturing with my hand that he should come in.
The house was pristine - something about my raging pregnancy hormones was making me seriously OCD about the tidiness of my flat, so it wasn't in a disgusting state like it had been occasionally when I first moved in and was going through a 'waithood' phase.
'I'm glad you say whatever the hell comes into your head,' he admitted, perching his (admittedly delightful) derriere onto my sofa.
'Why?' I challenged, teasing, 'Because what usually comes into my head is inappropriate and shallow comments about how attractive I find you?'
That smile again. 'You find me attractive.' It wasn't a question, but nonetheless a look of wonder did light up his sea glassy green eyes.
Drew was hesitant now, before slowly beginning to say, 'Look, Nova, you... it's obvious that I'm attracted to you too.'
I nodded, but without a clue as to where the flipping hell this conversation was now headed.
He stopped, looking tense and unlike himself, running a hand through his chocolaty brown hair in that nervous way that he did. Neither of us said a word for a few moments, the silence broken by three words.
'So marry me.'
'Huh?' I don't think I could have sounded more unladylike if I tried.
'Marry me.' Drew repeated.
Marriage? Marriage? I repeated the word so many times in my head in the space of two seconds that it had immediately lost all meaning.
What had I been expecting? Not this. Had I even thought about marriage? Hell no. Would I consider it? ...Maybe.
I bit my lip and swung my legs up onto the sofa, sitting sideways and cross legged on it so that I faced Drew full on, but I could feel the furrow of my brow and confused slackness of my jaw on my face and wondered how I must have looked to him.
The two of us looked at each other, neither of us daring to look away despite our shaky gazes. Things were different now. Things were serious in the purest sense of the word.
'Why?' I asked, baffled.
'Why not though?' Drew responded, continuing, 'It would be the easiest thing to do, I think. I've thought it through and maybe that's what we're meant to do. And this way we can - if you want to - bring up the baby in a stable relationship and your parents won't kill you and the press won't kill me. ...Will they?' he asked as an afterthought.
I frowned and stopped, rubbing my eyes and wishing I'd thought to put on my glasses because I was now suffering from a severe headache.
'I - sorry Drew, just a sec, and don't take this the wrong way but I'm feeling so hot right now and need to take off my supremely chavvy hoodie or else I'm going to melt like a flipping ice cream. This is not an intentional strip tease,' I added in a business like voice, my fingers going to the zip of my maroon hoodie and pulling it down quickly, sliding my arms out of it before I tossed it over the side of my sofa.
I breathed a sigh of relief as the cooler air hit me, fanning myself with my hand before realizing my developing and probably flapping bingo wings were most likely the least attractive sight Drew had seen so I stopped, especially when I was now just dressed in my teal tank top.
Drew was about to say something, but stopped. His eyes almost involuntarily dropped to my navel, the tiniest bit rounded now that I was just about to hit the nine week mark. It wasn't yet a bump, but even I could see the slight difference. Drew had seen me in my birthday suit glory, and if he remembered that night clearly he would probably notice the difference too.
God Nova, stop being so inappropriate at a time like this, I scolded myself, when my incontrollable brain flickered to slightly hazy images of Drew in his birthday suit glory, our bodies a little sweaty and my legs clamped around him as we -
Okay Nova, seriously. Shut up now.
I felt heat flooding up my neck to my cheeks at my own thoughts that I should have been jailed for, just as Drew's eyes flicked back up to my face.
'Hey-' Drew began, one of his hands gently reaching up to my cheek and frowning as he moved the hand to my forehead. 'You're so hot, Nova.'
I laughed and scrunched up my nose. 'Thanks, means a lot.'
He rolled his eyes and cracked a smile. 'Seriously though, you're burning up. How are you even standing up right now? You've got a bad fever.'
'I think I'm just blushing, Drew,' I said, waving my hand airily, but now that he mentioned it my head was pounding and the PMSness of my brain when it came to how hot or cold I was had an explanation.
'Nova,' Drew replied sternly.
I'm not going to lie, there was something about the way that Drew said my name that had me melting into a pile of mashed potato (not that anything or anyone could actually melt into mashed potato) and if he'd asked me to - not that he ever would - I would probably sleep with him on the spot.
Okay, I really was a hormonal pregnant slut.
'Is paracetamol safe for you to take?' he asked.
'I'm not actually too sure,' I responded, adding, 'Maybe we should Google it.'
Drew smiled despite his attempt at being firm and took out his iPhone from the pocket of his dark jeans, tapping into it and scrolling through a few things until he found what he was looking for.
'It says here that it's all right in small doses for a short amount of time, but that ideally you shouldn't take any meds for the first three months.'
'Mm,' I said. 'I might just bypass it for now and just make myself a bit of a soup instead or something. I'll be fine,' I added dismissively when he didn't look too convinced, sliding my legs out from under me and standing up, which was a bad, bad idea.
The world was spinning a little and I stumbled, Drew standing up and wrapping his hand around my wrists to stop me from falling on the floor like a crappily flipped pancake.
'What was that you said?' Drew said, eyebrows raised and his face inches from mine. '"I'll be fine", was it?'
He smiled and bumped his nose against my cheek in an almost little kiss that I was sure would have had more effect on my fickle heart than an actual kiss anyway.
'I am fine,' I insisted, despite the fact that it felt like I was having a hernia half due to Drew and half due to my rapidly rising temperature that I was really beginning to feel now.
'Obviously not as fine as dat ass of yours,' I said, 'but still pretty close.'
Drew laughed and let one of my wrists go, that hand slipping into the hair at the back of my neck.
This was easy. Surprisingly so. Movement and touch between Drew and me just felt effortlessly natural, and I didn't know whether that was supposed to scare me or not.
'Nova,' he murmured.
'Hmm?'
'Look, forget the marriage thing for the moment. Come stay with me for a bit, instead. Just for a little while, so you're not cooped up alone in this bloody flat and I don't know, so that that I can sort of look after you just until you get a bit better.'
'I don't need looking after,' I argued, brow furrowing.
'Maybe not all the time, but right now I think you do. I'm not saying it to be a possessive weirdo, I just don't like the idea of you knocked out with a fever with no one to call or anything. Laina's got work to be busy with and I've got a couple of weeks free to do absolutely nothing except bum around. So bum around with me,' Drew said, his eyes and voice and words so bloody persuasive.
'"Bum around with me", hey? How dirtily that could be perceived,' I said, a smirk and a bubble of laughter stuck in my throat despite that twinge of annoyance at Drew's insistence that I needed looking after like I was a child myself.
'Oh piss off,' he said, laughing too.
'But...' I hesitated. I felt like I was signing a lease if I agreed to this. 'Okay.'
'Okay?'
'Okay.'
Hey guys! First off, I am so, so sorry for leaving it on that heinous cliffhanger for two weeks, and also for not replying to any comments last chapter. Traveling is... really weird and I'm kind of stuck as to what I'm actually doing, in that waithood phase at the moment. I hope you liked this chapter and that you're still liking the story so far. I promise it'll pick up speed etc if you feel you're getting bored, so I hope you keep reading. Anyway, I sincerely hope that you're all doing well and having a lovely summer! MUCH LOVE! :D xoxo ...(Also, am I the only one finding myself attracted to the new Doctor? For a 55 year old gray haired guy, he really isn't too shabby ;))