I waited for my dad on the parking lot, leaning against the motorbike when the bus stopped right in front of me. The bus doors opened and my dad stepped out. He rushed towards me with long steps and expression so furious my legs almost gave in.
He was frowning so much that his eyebrows were almost touching and his eyes looked dark black instead of light green.
When he reached me he didn't say anything. He simply grabbed my wrist and dragged me towards the bus while I tried to stop him by walking in the opposite way. But he was too strong and my resistance didn't make much of a difference.
Every crew member was looking at the ground, not wanting to get in the middle of a family quarrel. They all looked tired and I felt sorry that my breakaway kept them awake all night.
I was sure my dad didn't make things easy. He never understood how a child like me could trick a group of adults, so whenever I managed to do it, he would make sure everyone around him felt his rage.
"Dad? Come on! Let me go!"
My dad finally turned around to look at me and shouted: "Shut up! You don't have a right to talk right now!"
His eyes were emotionless, like I was looking at a green coloured glass.
"You..you..." I started, but I didn't know what I wanted to say.
"What Zoe? What? Am I a lousy father? Just because I have a successful career and you get everything you need or want? Are you feeling deprived even thought you are privileged? I let you do whatever you want to keep you satisfied. I put up with you every single day and when I restrict you something you decide that's exactly what you need. Not today, Zoe. Not today."
I stared at him blankly, not being able to process all those accusations that were thrown at me.
Am I really just another spoiled celebrity kid?
Of course I was. This was the only life I've ever know. Expensive hotel rooms, people always being there to please me, my secrets and mistakes all over the news. I never added much value to my life. Even when I wanted to. People would look at me strange when I said I wanted to be someone.
"But you already are. You're known all around the world!" they would reply.
Nobody understood that being a celebrity's child gave you no substance at all. You could never be your own person. You were always a kid who got everything because your parents were successful.
When we arrived at the hotel I was still lost in my thoughts, evaluating my life. We had to sneak in at the back because the crowd at the entrance was too big for security to control. My dad and I were escorted to our rooms by the hotel manager who kept expressing his love for my father's music.
When I was given the key to my room I practically ran inside and locked the door behind me, so I could enjoy some alone time and pull myself together.
I was called spoilt, arrogant, self-centred by the media all the time and I never fussed about it, but dad's words hit me hard. It was like I got slapped across the face and the pain was still stinging.
My look wondered around the room. It was huge. Probably much bigger than average people's apartment.
The room had a spacious living room that was joined with a fancy looking kitchen area which was most likely never used, because from what I heard, hotel offered food that tasted like heaven in your mouth.
Two doors were connected to a living room.
The ones on the left led to a bedroom with a king sized bed in the middle and a killing view over the city. The ones on the right led to a bathroom with bath, shower cabin, two sinks and a toilet.
The flyer on a coffee table in the living room was saying that a hotel also had its own fitness, indoors swimming pool and wellness centre, where you could get massage and enjoy the good old Finnish sauna.
The colour scheme of the room was gold and white with lots of marble in the bathroom, making me feel like royalty.
Except I was a little to rude to be royalty. A bit too carless. A bit to irresponsible. A nation could never look up to me. I was a terrible role model.
I kicked my shoes off and jumped on the bed. The pillows took me in, surrounding me with softness and I let out a satisfied, but tired sigh.
A knock on the door interrupted my nirvana.
I groaned while getting up, and mentally I think I was ready to stab whoever dared to disturb my moment of relaxation.
"Yes?" I grumbled, opening the door.
"Here," said a security guard Kevin, who was standing outside with a group of guys, and pushed a nerf gun into my hands. "We came to cheer you up."
I took a glance at the nerf gun before my lips curved into a smile. I could use some fun, and running up and down the hotel hallways, shooting at each other was pure definition of fun.
"Every man for himself or shall we pick teams," I questioned, putting a gun over my shoulder, so it was pointing up in the air.
"Team were a disaster last time. I say every man for himself."
"You think teams were a disaster just because you lost, Kev," commented a short, but well built guy at the back named Brad.
He was a system engineer, so his job was to take care of the sound system at the concerts and make sure everything was working before the show began. In the crew, however, he was known as the great strategist when it came to fights with nerf guns.
I gave him a high-five, laughing at Kevin who looked like someone had just insulted his mother.
All the guys were so competitive they often turned a hotel into a war zone. However, I had no right to judge them because I was the same. Winning meant having a bragging right until the next fight took place and, oh boy, did I enjoy teasing them.
These nerf gun fight were often a highlight of the week. It was our way of cooping with being on the road.
When you are around same people twenty-four-seven you are doomed to get in an argument with someone in the crew, so shooting at each other always helped realising the tension.
"Every man for himself then," I nodded at Kev once I stopped laughing.
We were quiet for a moment, memorising who was playing and what they were wearing, so we wouldn't shoot a random hotel guest or a hotel employee. It happened before and we were sued. The person claimed they suffered from trauma, and that they had nightmares about people shooting them with a nerf gun. My dad paid them a huge amount of money just to shut them up.
Kevin suddenly shouted: "Now!"
This was our sign. The clock started ticking. The rule was that we had about five minutes to hide around the hotel before it was game on.
I sprinted to the fire escape, down the stairs, entering the hallway a floor below. I took a few turns now and then, completely losing my orientation because every hallway looked just like the one before. There was no paintings on the wall which would help me memorise the way back and it drove me insane.
After a few more minutes I slowed down, getting more careful. If my calculations were right the game should start in a few seconds and anyone could jump from around the corner and shoot me.
I flinched at every sound, holding the nerf gun close and I was prepared to pull the trigger. I tiptoed forward and stopped in place as soon as I heard voices coming from down the hall.
"Listen to me, Carol. It's not going to happen. Ever."
It was my dad's voice, but he wasn't charming and sweet like usual when he talked to women.
This one had to really mess things up for him to get so rude.
"It's not negotiable." He paused for a moment, before continuing: "There's no way I'm letting you do that."
The door behind me opened and I had to put a hand to my mouth to stop myself from screaming. I looked at the person behind me ready to apologise when my eyes met his, and instead of saying sorry I rolled my eyes.
"What the hell are you doing?" Kyle asked, but I shushed him.
"Listen," I said pointing a finger in the direction of a voice. "Just shut up and listen."
He pressed against a wall next to me and raised an eyebrow.
"Who are we listening to?" he asked and my hand shot up to cover his mouth.
"Carol, I don't know what you expected. She's my daughter."
Kyle stopped struggling when he heard my dad talking about me to a mysterious woman named Carol.
Things were getting more interesting with each second.
"I don't care. I'm not letting you see her. Do I need to remind you I have the full custody?"
My mouth open in shock. He had to be talking to my mum. And he wouldn't let her see me!
Why?
"No," my dad continued, not knowing I was eavesdropping, not knowing my heart stopped at his words. "And you need to get out of Myrefall before people start talking. I don't want any drama. Are we clear? Ok. Bye."
I looked at Kyle terrified when I heard soft steps getting closer, so I pushed him into his room and closed the door.