Ugh. I groaned as I looked at myself in the mirror. Damn school uniform. Whoever designed this thing's a plank. "School uniform is a great idea, lets stop our children getting bullied by making them wear jumpers the colour of s***! There is no way in hell a plan this great could ever backfire!!!"
Plank.
I plucked at the brown jumper, remembering when the new headmaster came and showed us pictures of it in assembly.
"Those jumpers are crap!" one of the boys yelled, and the whole of our row called out:
"If you'll pardon the pun!", a new phrase for our little gang, and were rewarded for being smarticles with detention.
You should see the school photos. It looks like a giant took a dump and that dump morphed into us. Seriously. No joke.
I caught sight of the scissors that glinted from on my desk, and my hand itched to take them and cut giant holes in this jumper. It would be an improvement. Well, at least they couldn't stop me wearing my stripy socks. I love mah stripeh socks!! I love anything stripy! Zebra's are my favourite animal, so much so that in the good days before we had uniforms I went into school head to toe in black and white stripes. My math teacher, Mr Byron, sent me to Detention, saying I was painful to look at, so the next day I came in fully in black.
"Its an improvement, but what, are you a panther now?" he asked sarcastically, and I blinked innocently at him and then yelled:
"Heck no!!! I'M A NINJA ZEBRA!!!"
To which he responded by throwing a board pen at my face.
Anyway, you are probably wondering something along the lines of "Who the hell is this crazy girl? Has she had too much crack?!" well the answers to those questions are coming shortly. Firstly, yes, I have had too much crack.
Secondly, my name is Charlotte (Charlie [charles]) Griffin, no I am not related to Stewie Griffin (although that would be cool), and I live in Africa. No, just kidding, I actually live in a small town in Florida, America. I am fourteen years old, and I am tall, skinny, and unusually pale (for someone who lives in Florida) with light brown hair and blue-green eyes. Don't start with the wise cracks, I've heard them all. If wise cracks were pokemon, well, lets just say, I'd have more than enough pokemon on my hands, and would be seriously worried as I thought that pokemon were just on TV.
I like being pale, though. It helps my punkish look. Well, I'd say its more skater punk, consisting of lots of beanie hats and skinny jeans and torn t-shirts. I used to always get upset that I would never tan, but now I see it as a good thing, because I don't burn either.
I tweaked my uniform a little more, jamming my drainpipe-green beanie down over my newly straightened hair. It was the only one that matched my school uniform. It had a few badges pinned to it. I outlined my eyes in black kohl, and then pulled on my fingerless gloves, grabbed my bag, slipped on my converse and went outside to wait for the school bus. I sat down on the bench, daydreaming about Naruto. I know, I'm sad, in love with anime, but whatever, it is amazing!!! I don't really have a favourite character, though. They are all awesome! Well, except Orochimaru and Kabuto...
Eugh...
ANYway..
I sighed, pulling out my tippex pen and writing on my black converse.
"School days are the best days of your life." a voice said, reading over my shoulder. I looked up to see my bud Tommy standing behind me. I then continued, crossing out the best and scrawling the word worst above it.
"Oh, that makes much more sense. Especially with our fughut of a school."
"Yeah." I paused and grinned at him, and then we both said together "planks." and then laughed.
"Did you get Mr Freeman for art next year?" Tommy asked, sitting down beside me.
"No. I have Jesus instead." I muttered.
"Le gasp! Not Mr Gand!"
"The one and only." I said grimly, and Tommy patted my shoulder. Mr Gand and Mr Freeman were art teachers in the school. Mr Freeman was the cool teacher, who was handsome and up to date, and Mr Gand was an old, nasty smelling, strict teacher with a long beard and desperate need of a haircut, hence the whole of year nine calling him Jesus.
"Hey, faggot, how's it hangin'?" a stupoid boy from the year above called out to Tommy, and I saw my friends expression and stood up.
"Lower than yours, half a wotsit!" I growled at the boy.
"Are you joking?! Mine's an 8 incher!" he yelled, blushing.
"YEAH, AND I'M A RAINBOW UNICORN!!!" I yelled back.
"Shut up, you rugmu-!!!" he cut off, seeing my dangerous expression, and legged it.
"Yeah, that's what I thought. Plank." I muttered, and went and sat back down next to Tommy. Why can't real life boys be as smexy and cool as anime characters? Le sigh...
"You don't need to do that you know. You keep getting in fights because of me." he said sadly.
"Hey, you're my Tommy-chan! We gotta stick together! And isn't that what friends are for? Plus, I didn't take Karate since I was four for nothing. You should come along some time, get a little muscle. Then you could defend yourself better." I poked him on the arm softly.
"I wish I was a ninja." he sighed, and I chuckled.
"I AM a ninja!!!" I yelled, and pulled him to his feet as the bus pulled up, dragging him inside.
Did I mention? I'm also a hyperactive Narutard!!!
* * *
It was years ago that I first got into Naruto. I was visiting my cousin in England, and she had it on in her living room on Cartoon Network. From that point I demanded my mom to send me to ninja school, and when I realised that couldn't happen I took all sorts of after school classes, such as Karate and Tai quan do (sp???), and I'm pretty strong, though my strength isn't apparent because mah muscles be wiry, and I am very flexible. I spend majority of my spare time drawing Naruto fan art. The show is amazing! I have pictures all over my bedroom wall! It is just so cool!!!
Then Tommy and my other mate Zoey got to be Narutards through me. I was watching one of the DVD's one day when the two came round for me, and we ended up watching it together. We turned it into a sleepover, and spent the whole night watching the series. We even gave each other nicknames. Zoey is the Ginger Ninja (because of her ginger hair), I'm the Zebra-nin and Tommy is The scarf. Just don't ask.
Zoey POV (this is back that morn as well)
"Come on, Zoey! You'll be late for school!" My mom yelled, and I sighed, put down my Naruto manga, and checked my appearance in the mirror. I straightened my skirt and jumper, then tied my auburn hair in bunches with blue scrunchies and slicked on some lipgloss, the only make up I ever wore. I put my silver hoops in my ears, then ran barefoot downstairs, slinging my bag on my back and slipping my black sparkly ballet pumps, and ran outside. The streets were already buzzing with people, on their way to work or taking their kids to school.
Several people watched as I skipped in the streets, daydreaming about chocolate muffins. Yum. I still couldn't decide though. Which character was my fav?! Oh, woe is me!
"Argh, it's so difficult! Which is better?!" I yelled at the sky.
A passing woman looked at me, and hurried past, ushering her children to the other side of the sidewalk.
"Haha, carrot loser!" Adam from my school yelled at me as he passed on his bike. "I heard about you getting rejected by Matt!"
Matt. A guy I really liked, who said he "just wanted to be friends" and then slagged me off. So I tipped a bowl of cafeteria rice pudding over his head.
Argh, why couldn't I die and be reborn as an anime character? Specifically in Konoha.
"WHY ARE YOU SUCH A BITCH?!" I yelled at the sky. If I was ninja I could kill people and get away with it. I looked at the floor, and noticed a man staring at me.
"I KILL YOU!!! PERVERT!!" I screamed, and he ran away, crying.
"Ehh???" I frowned, confused. A grown man crying? As Charles would say, what a plank.
Charlie POV
"Well students, I would like to announce that preparations for the end of term dance are underway." Mr Thompson, our form tutor, announced. I just continued my drawing of Shukaku Gaara (AWESOME!!!), carefully inking in his hair with red biro. Did you know that in the anime, Gaara's hair is red, whereas in the manga original his hair is brown? It's weird, and more than a little confusing, the planks.
"Hey, did you hear that?! Sir said that the dance is almost here!" Zoey whispered excitedly.
"Whatever, it'll be lame anyway." I muttered, concentrating on my drawing.
"It might be fun!" Zoey whispered again, undeterred.
"It might be lame!" I replied in a fakely enthusiastic voice, and she pouted.
"It'll be fun..." she muttered.
"Yeah, and I'm a rainbow unicorn." I snorted, then packed my stuff away as the bell went for first lesson. "Let's face it, we're not going to be happy unless the Naruto characters show up and ask us to be their dates. And that is impossible, so happiness is getting on a train and waving goodbye, the plank."
"You're just grumpy because you didn't get your readibrek this morning." Zoey grumbled as we walked to science.
"I'm not grumpy! See!! SEE!!!" I screamed, and grinned fakely. She pulled an apple out of thin air and threw it at me. It hit me square on the forehead. I rubbed the sore patch and then punched her on the arm.
"OW!!" she yelled, and glared at me.
"Plank!" I yelled at her, and as we argued we earned a few weird looks from other students.
"Do you mind?!?!" I yelled at them, and then Mr Emerson came outside, and it was time to go in for science.
"I still say you're grumpy." Zoey said as I unpacked my schoolbag.
"I AM NOT GRUMPY!!!" I yelled.
"Miss Griffin!" somebody yelled.
"WHAT?!?!" I shouted, only to discover it was the teacher that shouted, who responded by throwing a chair at me. Oops.
* * *
"Yayayayz!!! Naruto marathoooon!!" Zoey yelled, and normally I would be yelling too, but I was too busy looking at this weird... THING I found on the bus home. It looked like a toothbrush, and most people wouldn't pick up some random toothbrush they found on the bus, but I did. Because I'm awesome.
No, not really.
Jeez, are you stupid? How would picking up a toothbrush that could be carrying rabies make me awesome?!
No, it seemed to call to me. It was weird, like something bad would happen if I didn't.
"Seriously, Charlie, I don't know why you picked up that thing. It could be carrying rabies!" See, totally on the same page.
"I know, Tommy, but... I still can't shake this feeling..." I put the toothbrush on my desk (we had arrived in my room) and flopped onto my bed while Tommy set up the DVD player.
"But it's just a toothbrush." Zoey sid, deadpanned, and I scowled at her. Then noticed the TV, and screamed:
"YEAH!! NARUTO DATTEBAYO!!!" and it kind of went on from there.
* * *
"OH YEAH!! Shukaku Gaara kicks those rain nins' butts!!!" I yelled, fist pumping. Good thing my parents were out.
We were at the chunin exam arc now, in the *cue dramatically deep voice* Forest of death. DUN DUN DUNNNN!! And Gaara just killed some dweebs. He looked so cute under that umbrella!
Then the power went off. What a plank.
"Aaaawwwwww!!!" we all groaned, collapsing in a heap. Then I sprang up, and grabbed a candle off my desk (my mom makes me keep it there in case of emergencies) and get this:
It lit without me even using a candle.
"Dude! That is awesome!" then something touched my hand. I span around, only to almost drop the candle.
"Guys...? Did either of you bring a dog in here?" I asked, not looking away from the ball of fluff that resembled a Yorkshire terrier. Then the power came back on, and I blew out the candle.
"Okay... Charlie, you never said you had a dog." Tommy said, and I gave him a look.
"That's because I don't." I said.
"Then why is one in here?" Zoey asked, puzzled, and I threw my hands up in exasperation.
"I don't know!" then I noticed something. "Where's the toothbrush gone?"
"That would be me." I could of fallen over then.
"I must be high or something, 'cuz I'm pretty sure the dog just talked." I said, and the dog (wow this feels weird) rose a hairy eyebrow.
"I did."
* * *
About ten minutes had gone by, and the dog just kept saying some cryptic crap and I'm pretty sure he just told us to go in the wardrobe.
"The world that you seek is through the wardrobe." he said, and I had to hold back laughter.
"What is this, a rewrite of Narnia? You don't really expect me to believe that-" I cut off as I opened my wardrobe and was met by a gust of wind. Then I was falling, into blackness.
Phew, that was looong!!!
But yeah, fan vote and comment!
Sayonara!