Author's note:
Well Hello there lovely readers and followers! I am so sorry for the really really super duper late update! But I had MAJOR writers block and I moved into my new dorm and just started college! So I did take a bit of a writing hiatus. I'm so sorry if this chapter isn't as good as the rest but I literally wrote and re-wrote this like 10 times!!! Also, as my sorry 'gift' this chapter is 10 pages on word! Hahaha well I hope you enjoy this chapter! Comment (please tell me what you think, I hope I haven't disappointed you), Vote and Follow! Also, I will try to upload as soon as I can!!!
Lots of Love,
BAManna
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When Niclas and I tumbled into our house, I was smothered with kisses, hugs and tummy caresses. Marni’s hands cupped my face making sure that I still looked the same to her. It was nice to have Marni care about me and accept me for who I am. Next it was Pam. She gave me the biggest hug ever and engulfed me in her chubby frame. Niclas was laughing, I was laughing and before I knew it Clive had his arms wrapped around my shoulders dropping a little kiss on my forehead. I smiled gratefully and hugged him back. It was Clive who had saved me after all.
“Thank you so much for coming you guys, I really appreciate it” I smiled at them. I was about to walk over to the couch when footsteps boomed from the kitchen.
“There’s my daughter in law!” It was Niclas’ dad, Frank. After the conversation we had that one night when we were both waiting for Niclas to come home, Frank had given me so much more respect. And now that Niclas and I were almost together for a year Frank didn’t ignore me anymore. His laughter echoed throughout the house.
“How you feeling child?” Frank too gave me a fatherly hug.
“I’m fine Frank, everything’s okay now” I replied cheerfully.
“Good, you get lots of rest now you hear me?”
“Sure Frank” I laughed. Niclas pulled me to him and put his arm around my shoulder, giving me a full kiss on the lips. Everyone cooed at us, but while I blushed and tried to pull away Niclas seemed to be enjoying the attention and wouldn’t let me go. Finally I managed to slap him away with a silly grin and a blush.
After the embarrassing scene with Niclas, the women pulled me into the kitchen to help with dinner while the men all settled onto the couch and resorted to watching some live football. I could already hear them cheering like no other.
“As soon as Niclas gave us a call, Frank and I jumped on the plane to get here. Honey we’re so happy you’re okay. My future grandson or granddaughter must be a strong baby” Marni said as she busily prepared the potato salad.
"Yes, it gave me a really big scare. I thought I was going to lose my first child" We chattered more and on about the condition of the baby and loud hoots of cheers or groans were heard from the living room as the men watched their football.
Pam and Marni were sharing a bottle of wine as I sat across them with my cup of orange juice. We were talking about what gender the baby could possibly be and whether he or she would be baptised. I agreed to the baptising very much and was about to ask Pam and Marni's thoughts about it when the doorbell rang. "Oh let me get that first" I said as I quickly shuffled to the front door. The huge smile fell from my face as soon as I swung open the door and saw who it was.
My mother.
I gave her a straight look and didn't say a word. My mother looked nervous, but determined. Before she could utter a word Pam had called out from the kitchen asking who it was, and when I didn't reply I heard her footsteps stop right behind me.
"Is there someone or something you would like?" Pam stole the words from me as she asked my mother with a cold tone.
"I would like to speak to my daughter" My mother replied curtly. Pam let out a snort.
"She is no daughter of yours. This young lady is a beautiful, smart woman with manners and there is no need of you to put her under anymore stress. We don't need to be sending her to the hospital again anytime soon." My mothers face turned into a frown and her fists curled but Pam stood her ground.
"Why, who are you to tell me what to do? Allie is my biological daughter. I have the right to speak to her whenever I want too."
"She hasn't been your daughter since the day she ranaway from that god awful place y'all call home. She is my daughter now, I have raised her since the day she got lost and blinded by the pain that you and your family have caused her."
"You have no business in saying that!" My mom almost yelled. This caused Marni to come scurrying over and the boys to turn their attention from the TV.
"IT'S YOU!" Marni yelled, her hand was almost ready to throw the wooden spoon she was holding at my mother. "Because of you my grandchild's life was in danger! What are you doing on this porch! Haven't you caused my daughter-in-law enough pain?"
"Mom, please" Niclas finally walked over and so did Frank and Clive. All three women were fuming and Frank had to pull Marni away and coax her into letting go off the wooden spoon as he brought her to the kitchen.
"You do not lay a finger on Allie, you hear me?" Pam pointed fingers at my mother and Clive stepped in.
"Look, Lisa. We are trying to have a nice dinner tonight. And if circumstances were different we would have invited you and your family over as well. However with the situation lately, I'm sure that we would appreciate it if you would give us our space as the rest of your family is enjoying their vacation in San Francisco."
"Please, just let me talk to her" My mother pleaded at Clive, she tried to grab onto his hand but Pam swatted it away. Niclas stood beside me and gave my shoulder a squeeze, a sign for support. I was sure that Pam was going to yell out obscenities at my mother so I was thankful when Clive intervened again.
"Lisa, I appreciate you trying to mend things with your daughter but now just isn't the right time. We are in the midst of celebrating. It would be much more ideal if you came back in a few days." Clive had this certain way of speaking to people. It made you just want to listen to him and make sure that he isn't disappointed in you. My mother looked as if she wanted to protest but decided to keep quiet, she gave me one last pleading glance but I turned away from her and hid into Niclas' arms. I wasn't ready to forgive her yet. I wasn't ready to forgive the woman who had tortured me, who had accused me of being a gold digger and who almost made me have a miscarriage.
Niclas enveloped me in a tight hug and with the click of the door she was gone, I felt safe again. The room started to settle from the high tension it was just in, it was as if everyone let out a deep breath. A sad smile was given to me before the women and the men dispersed to the dining room, leaving me and Niclas alone in the foyer.
"Baby, everything will be just fine okay?" I nodded my head as Niclas kissed me gently.
"Niclas I'm so sorry" I quietly said. My wonderful husband gave me a quizzical look.
"I'm so sorry for dragging you into all this mess. I'm sorry I had to put you through this. I'm so sorry that Marni and Frank had to see me like this. I'm so embarassed and I'm so sorry for embarassing you" The words that Ashley had said weeks ago replayed in my mind.
'You're just going to embarass him, he needs a strong woman with connections like me'
"Allie, stop that. I've told you a thousand times and I'll tell you a thousand times more if I have to. You're never an embarassment to me. That's why you're carrying my baby. That's why you're here. Because I love you and that's all I need" I said a silent okay.
"But you need to believe me Allie," I nodded eagerly.
"I do, I really do it's just-" Niclas shut me up with a kiss and just like that everything faded away and I believed everything he said. I remembered our vows, I remembered that Ashley meant nothing and that I was here and I was okay and that I had Niclas and a new caring, loving family. And that's all I really needed.
We were about to head back to join everyone for dinner when there was two knocks on the door. I sighed and looked at Niclas, connfused as to who was interrupting us for the second time that day. Niclas ran his hand through his hair and let out a deep breath. Man, he was so sexy, I snuggled under his arm and hugged him as he opened the door.
The surprised look on my face won't even begin to explain how shocked I was to see Reece on the other side of the door. I mean if it was Brody I would have been less surprised but... Reece. After the incident, after my reputation went downhill he barely spoke a word to me, he would only acknowledge my existence if he needed a verbal punching bag. And like a big fat fist heading towards my face I immediately backed away and cowered into Niclas. I was afraid of Reece. Brody would still be civil to me, he wouldn't acknowledge my existence but he barely yelled at me. So it was just that, he acted like I didn't exist but I couldn't say the same about Reece.
"Hi Allie," My hands were cluthcing onto Niclas so hard I might have hurt him, I bit my lip out of nervousness and darted my eyes back and forth from Reece to Niclas.
"Hey, how's it going man" Niclas spoke up. His hand went on to my waist to support me. Reece smiled up at him then looked at me again.
"Allie, can I speak to you please..." My mouth opened then closed, I couldn't form any words so I was very thankful when Niclas intervened.
"Your mother just left about a minute ago, I don't think today is a good day Reece. I'm sorry" Reece looked at me and started begging me to talk to him. I could see Niclas start to get irritated and slowly he was pushing me behind him. I didn't want there to be any rift between my husband and my brother so with all the courage I could muster up I blurted out the words.
"I-I'll talk to him" Instantly Niclas turned around so that his back was towards Reece and we were facing each other. He looked me in the eyes and I knew he was asking me if I was sure I wanted too. I wasn't to be honest. I didn't want too, but I had to. So i softly nodded.
Niclas caressed the side of my face before turning back aroung and inviting Reece in. Just as I was leading Reece to the living room, Marni, Frank, Pam and Clive had their coats and shoes on ready to leave.
"Honey, we're going to go get some ingredients from the house and Frank and Marni are going to get some market groceries for dinner. We will be right back honey dew, if you-" Pam's eyes focused on Reece. "WHAT are you doing here?" She immediately yelled at him and I had to pull her to the side to tell her it was my decision and that it was okay. Pam's eyes softened and gave me a hug.
"Okay, but if anything happens, or if he threatens you, you call for Niclas"
"I know, I know. Niclas will be in the study, don't worry Pam I'll be okay" I reassured here.
"Honey, you're in a fragile state-" Just then I laughed when Clive dragged her away and the four of them were out of the house.
I settled onto the couch comfortably, tucking my legs under me and Reece sat opposite of me. We sat there in silence and I was sweating like a sinner in church. I was fiddling with my fingers and looking anywhere but him. Finally Reece started talking.
"Allie, what happened?" My head immediately snapped up. What did he mean by that? Reece must have understood my confusion when he rephrased what he said.
"I meant you and Niclas, how did you get such a perfect house? Look at this place, it's amazing! Where did you meet him?"
"Oh" I silently said. "I-I met him at one of dad's gatherings, it was when I could still handle large crowds. He found me, and he took care of me. He's very smart." Was all I said and I couldn't help but boast about my husband a little.
"This place, the furniture must have cost a fortune! You're such a lucky girl Allie" What was I supposed to say to that? Sure the place cost a lot, the furniture was mostly Pam and Niclas' work. So I stayed quiet. The room was silent again for a second.
"Allie why did you run? Why didn't you say something? I could've-" I stopped him right there.
"You're just like mom! How could you? How could you say that? Why do you think I ran? I ran away so that I didn't have to be near people like you. Don't act like you care now Reece, you never did. Why are you even here? Do you think I'll go back home to let you use me as your punching bag? Why didn't I say something? Don't even go there. I tried so hard," My voice broke, the emotion and the feelings I had been trying so hard to supress today finally broke free.
"I tried so hard to make everyone happy, I tried so hard to tell mom, to tell dad, to tell the school nurse, the counselor and no one cared. Brad did, but after what happened to Jade he stopped caring too. I made you and Brody snacks every night in hopes that one day you would return my kindness with some of your own but I've learnt that no matter how hard I try you are all rotten toxic people. The way you used me, the way you talked to me, the way you treated me-"
"There is a reason behind that!" Reece tried to retaliate.
"What is that reason Reece" I almost yelled. I was out of breath, I was exerting too much force on myself. "Because of your popularity? I am your sister for God's sake! I am your blood! And you treated people who only loved you for your status over me. I genuinely loved you and Brody, I missed my brothers but what is left in that empty shell of your body is some unexplainable mean, confused soul." Reece wanted to say something and he was frowning, not a good sign but I put up my hand and stopped him from talking
"I needed you, I needed you and Brody, I needed my brothers to protect me when I couldn't protect myself. But no one was there for me. You yelled at me over a printer, you yelled at me when the cupcake mix wasn't good enough. Heck, Reece I don't know how many more times I need to perfect my cupcake recipe to make it live up to your expectations. You yelled at me when I was getting picked on at school, you yelled at me when I hid in my room, and I can't take it anymore! I can't take anymore abuse from you! From anyone back home! Why are you even here!"
Reece stood up to say something and raised his arm to make a gesture but it was too late a scream ripped its way from my mouth and I quickly but unsteadily stood up, i backed away from Reece until my back bumped into the wall. His face instantly changed to that of a concerned look and both his hands reached out to catch my fall but I slid down the wall and I cowered away from Reece as far as I could. I felt the world closing down on me, it was difficult to breathe and I felt like I was suffocating. My breathing increased and I tried to take in as much air as I could. But it wasn't working, everything sounded dull and I could hear the thumping footsteps of someone coming downstairs. My eyes focused for a second and I sae Reece coming closer to me, was he going to hit me! With that thought I started crying, I was terrified.
"Please, stop. Don't! No! I'm so sorry!" I begged.
"Allie, calm down!" Reece tried,
"No! Please! No! Don't touch me! No! No! Help!"
"Allie, wake up!" Reece shook me harder and my head bumped into the wall.
"I'm so sorry! No I didn't mean what I said! Don't hurt me! Please!"
"What the hell is going on!" My head snapped to the source of the voice, Niclas. I tried to say something but my mouth opened and closed like a fish, Niclas immediately made his way to me and I clutched onto him. No words could form in my mouth, but my crazy eyes must have been enough for him to understand that the conversation had taken a turn for the worst. Niclas slowly lifted me up in his arms and put my legs around his waist as I leaned my head onto his shoulder. He soothingly rubbed the small of my back and I started to clam down. Everything was still a blur though, I could see Niclas leading Reece out of the door, Reece still looking concerned, Reece looking angry, Reece looking regretful but I didn't care I was so tired. So so tired.
Niclas carried me upstairs and sat me down on the bed before handing me a pill. I gulped it down quickly and everything focused again. I looked at a concerned Niclas and put my hand over his.
"How bad was it this time?" I said shakily.
"It wasn't good baby" I looked down and cried. "What am I going to do" Niclas enveloped me in a hug and I cried onto his shirt.
"What am I going to do! I'm going to be the worst mother in the world, I can't even control myself how am I supposed to control my kids, what if I get a panic attack when it's not a good time, what if I can't be there for my child when they need me because of these stupid panic attacks, I'm so stupid, I'm so so stupid-"
"Allie, everything is going to be okay. You're going to get through this, and you'll be the best mom in the world, and if you can't be there for our baby then I will. You have me Allie, you can rely on me, we'll get through this together. I'll help you and it's going to be okay. I know it will." Slowly Niclas had me lie down on the bed, he joined me for a while and helped me to sleep. As I was drifting off all I could think off was how the rest of the week would go, I hoped that I wouldnt have to have anymore confrontations, but I was sure that would be impossible.
Like Niclas said, I just wanted everything to be okay.