Elliot
***
"I'm so going to be in a sugar coma by tomorrow," I say, biting into another fun sized crunch bar.
"You said you were gonna stop eating them ten minutes ago," Carter laughs, leaning against the coffee table.
I squint my eyes. "What?"
"You said you were gonna stop eating them... ten minutes ago?" He repeats, much slower. "Do your sugar comas start with unbalanced brain chemicals?"
"You talk too fast and your accent is too strong," I say, chewing the candy bar and crossing my legs while siting on my living room floor across from him. "You're difficult to understand."
"Well," he shrugs. "I'm not going to apologize."
"I didn't ask you to, Carter."
"Did you really just sass me?" he bursts out laughing, causing me to lean back and cover my mouth with my hand. I couldn't even swallow.
"Stop," I beg, "I'm sorry!"
"You just got so real."
"What?"
"Oh my god you heard me, stop."
I tear open another crunch, one of my lasts, most likely. Carter and I ended up sitting on the carpet of my floor instead of the couch, this way we can sit across from each other and actually have a real conversation.
"What time is it anyway?" I wonder out loud.
Carter checks his phone, his round eyes widening as soon as the small screen illuminates part of his face. "Almost three a.m."
"Damn," I mumble, tossing the second chocolate bar into my mouth. "You should be going home soon."
"I should," he laughs. "But it's like-- "
But he was cut off my the sound of my phone buzzing behind him on the coffee table, rattling across the wood as the screen lights up.
"Who would be calling you at this time?" Carter asks slowly, just as he flicks his curly locks out of the way from his forehead, licking his lips.
I reach for my phone, struggling in attempt not to groan. I hated talking on the phone. I only ever text now.
"Oh god," I blurt out as soon as I see the caller ID, my eyes widening with each passing second, heart speeding up with each vibration from the small device.
"Who is it?" Carter asks curiously.
I try to regain my breath, but all I could do was croak, "it's Shawn Mendes."
His jaw drops, body freezing for a moment. "Wait, what? As in, the Shawn Mendes? The one who knocked up that actress girl? You know him??"
"I actually used to date him," I mumble, still fully aware of the call, still unanswered. "It's all a really long story, but I don't know why he would be calling me. It's.. I mean, it's over--"
"If you don't answer the phone, I will," he says quickly.
"Carter, seriou--"
He rips the phone out of my hands at the last second, clicking the green button and bringing it to his ear. He was scooted even closer to me now.
"Hello?" He says into the speaker, hopeful that he wasn't too late, I could tell.
His eyes light up. "Oh, no, this is her friend, Carter." Then he laughs. "I promise her voice didn't drop four octaves and pick up an Irish accent since you last saw her."
A pause on the other end. I sit as still as I can, but my fingers were trembling slightly.
Why would he be calling me? Shouldn't he be too busy with his girlfriend and their unplanned baby-- painting the spare room for the nursery and taking turns talking to her stomach or something? What could be so important that he needs to talk to me about it?
"Yeah, yeah, she's right here," Carter says, smiling off into the distance as if he was actually speaking to someone else in the room.
"Okay, I'll let you talk to her."
I slowly reach out for the phone, but Carter pulls it towards his chest instead, covering up the bottom with his palm for a second as he whispers, "he's so drunk."
I suppose that cleared things up a bit.
"Shawn?" I say into the phone, secretly hoping he would just hang up before he says whatever he needs to say.
"Hey, sweetie," he says happily. "Did you hear that I'm a daddy?"
I shift uncomfortably on the floor. "Uhm," I clear my throat. "Yeah, I did."
"It's a girl," he adds. "I'm having a girl."
"Congratulations," I say, glancing at Carter in the corner of my eye, who was staring at me, not moving a muscle so that he could hear everything Shawn was saying on the other end of the line.
"I'm not happy about it," he slurs. "Otherwise I wouldn't be calling you from the men's room of a night club."
"Where's Sarah?"
"Don't know," he hums. "I left her at the hospital. She probably got a cab home, but I haven't heard from her."
"Wh--"
"I left the tour, too. Did you hear about that, honey? Did you hear I left the tour? My mum made me. And Sarah is keeping something from me that my mum knows about but neither of them will tell me. And Jesus Christ, I'm a daddio!"
"Everyone already knows all of this stuff," I inform him. "It's only the juiciest story in every magazine ever."
"I know, but I figured you wouldn't read them, since you're pissed at me."
"No I'm not," I say, even though I am.
"Yes you are," he argues, a clanking sound going on in the background. "I told you that I loved you and then got someone pregnant, to whom I also confessed my love. My life is so fucked up, you know? Of course you're pissed at me. I'm pissed at me."
I wait a while, not really knowing how to respond. He sounded really, really drunk. After not hearing from him for months, the first call I get from him is one he's going to regret later.
"I'm sorry," I say finally.
"I wish things weren't so complicated," he sighs. "Can I tell you a secret?"
I bite my lip, narrowing my gaze on Carter, who was smiling his face off. He's the only person I've associated myself with recently who doesn't hate everything about this situation.
"Okay," I nod.
He waits a beat. "When you left, I wondered if there was something that I could've done differently that would've made you stay. That was the first depressing thought I've ever had, really. You know you broke me, right?"
"I'm aware," I say slowly, feeling like shit. "I thought we were done talking about this."
"That led to so many more," he continues, ignoring me, "and now this. I honestly, honestly feel that I have hit rock bottom. I'm not ready to have a baby, I'm not ready to get married, I'm not ready for any of this! I have sunk so fucking low, I don't think I'll ever find my way back to sanity."
He sighs, his anger slowly decreasing. "Unless, of course, I see you again."
"W-what?" I stammer.
"I've already told you this," he says. "You make me feel a different way. Even though you've changed so much since we were together, in one day, just one day, I fell more in love with the new Elle than I ever did with Sarah, or anyone else.
"You just jumped in when I was at a, um, high in my life. I didn't even realize how much I hated everything and missed you until I saw you again for the first time, and then everything had changed. I'm still so fucking in love with you, Elliot Johnson. Please don't leave me to go back to the life I've been living since the moment you walked out of it. I need you. I love you. I really, really do."
What the fuck, Carter mouths, though it needed up coming out in a loud whisper.
I couldn't move, again. My throat was hot and tight, eyes stinging with tears that he never failed to trigger.
"I'm sorry," I groan. "But you have a girlfriend. And a baby."
"No, stop!" Carter whisper-yells, hands waving in my face. "Listen to him! He doesn't love her!"
"He can't let that baby girl grow up without a father!" I exclaim, the phone still to my ear.
"She wouldn't!" Shawn yells. "We can make it work, just please, please tell me you feel the same way. Elliot, come on. I might be drunk, but that doesn't mean you're just talking to alcohol. I'm going to remember this conversation. So tell me, please, be honest... do you love me, too? Do you want to be with me?"
***
I'll try to stop the cliff hangers lmfao
only a few chapters left! get ready for an ending as heck