I lean on the sink, staring at my new hair. Silver. No rat tails. Straightened fringe. A side cut shaven up the right hand side. With such light hair, I almost look like an entirely different person - especially after bleaching my brows for good measure.
My fingers ache against the slowly warming porcelain. What am I doing? Why am I changing everything - if I do, if Light gets aggravated...
What will he do? How many more people will he kill if I act out of turn?
But... my very existence in this world... changes everything... If Light truly is attached to me, everything I do has the ability to affect him. And if L's right, if I'm actually something Light doesn't want to give up...
I rest my still-damp forehead against the cold mirror, trying to dispel some of the heat that tends to build when I stress.
"What are you doing, Smith?" I ask myself. I throw on some of the clothes Watari bought for me - a spaghetti-strap top, a loose grey sweater and black skinny jeans. The clothes fit quite well, even if the jeans could use a belt.
Instead of going directly to the main room, where L is, I detour to the kitchen and plate up some chocolate chip cookies. Comfort food for me and fuel for the sugar-addicted genius. I carry the plate out to the main room.
"Hey."
"Are you already finished? I somehow expected you to take longer."
"Yeah, well, I'm not one of those obsessive girls. Biscuits."
"Thanks."
I set the plate down on the coffee table, watching a pale hand dart out to take several at once. When I stand again, L is staring at me.
"Un...?"
"You do look very different." L states, turning back to the computer before him. "But, certainly not in a bad way."
"Oh... thank you."
"For the time being, you'll have to pretend to be my girlfriend."
"Wh-what?!"
"We don't look similar enough to pass as siblings. I don't want to risk the two of us having separate hotel rooms. And we're going to be together for most of the next few weeks. It would be easier to pretend we're lovers studying in Tokyo."
"Ah, I... suppose that makes sense, but..."
"I'm not going to make you do anything drastic - simply hold my hand and cheer me on if I get into any sort of spat. Also, we'll need to arrange an alias for you. Do you think you'd be able to answer to false names?"
"Yes."
"Right. How does 'Uta Kinobori' sound to you?"
I touch the shaved portion of my hair, unable to resist thinking of Uta from Tokyo Ghoul even though it's on the opposite side. 'Uta' means song or poem, while 'Kinobori' means tree climbing.
"Have you been stalking me?" I ask. L gives a soft hum of confusion.
"I love to sing, and I've been an avid climber since I was small."
"Strange that I haven't been made aware of that... I suppose that will be your most consistent alias, for now. Also, we're being signed up for the same university Light is going to."
"Doesn't that make this whole kidnapping scheme moot?"
"You know him; therefore, you can make observations that I cannot. Most likely you are privy to the habits and quirks that his father is unaware of."
"I see... You said Uta Kinobori would be my most consistent alias - does that mean there will be others?"
"However many are necessary. Putting you in a compromising position would negate my ability to protect you. How do you feel about the police knowing you as Aikurushii?"
"You think of me as sweet and cute?"
"I certainly don't think adversely of that. More than anything, I like the irony of it. You look rather intimidating and brash with that hair. By the way, it was a good thought to bleach your eyebrows."
Even though I don't blush, the comments certainly have me self-conscious.
"You'd be surprised by how often the people who look intimidating and brash turn out to be kind and accepting."
"No, I wouldn't."
"Ah... Right. World's greatest detective."
"One of."
"No. The one and only."
L casts me a sidelong glance, a curious look on his face. A grin quirks at my lips, which only draws more curiosity from my companion.
"Whatever makes you think that, Aikurushii?"
"You're mad fond of keeping your identity secret - which is understandable. It's not so far fetched that some of the other great detectives of the world may simply be you. The methods of Eraldo Coil and Deneuve stand out particularly."
L looks straight at me now. I take a biscuit from the plate and nibble on it.
"That's a very attractive line of thought."
"When you think about it, it's rather simple. Keep the identity safe while still working on cases. Make yourself less of a target by adding competition. Nobody sees the true face of their superior regardless, so why not throw out a few red herrings? Nobody's going to know the difference."
I finish my biscuit and look back to L. What surprises me is his facial expression. L smiles faintly at me, turning a biscuit between his fingers.
"I was right about you."
"What do you mean?"
"You've got the makings of a mad genius, and a practical intelligence that a school's narrow grading field cannot measure."
"People used to tell me I just read into things too deeply."
"That's how a detective makes their living."
L then begins to munch on his biscuit, returning his gaze to the papers in front of him.
"Kinobori-san, do you think you could answer a few questions?"
I blink at the sudden switch back to Japanese. But, then again, the use of the name and such formalities...
"Yeah, I suppose."
"Very good. Can you tell me a little about your family?"
Ah, I see. Building an alibi.
"My parents met while my father was studying abroad; he was from Japan, she was from England. According to Tousan, she was a real songbird - I guess that's where I got the name. She passed away when I was quite young, which is when Tousan took me here."
"Where did you grow up?"
"I lived in Liverpool until I was eight. Then Tousan and I moved to Mito."
"And why are you in Tokyo?"
"Studying. I'm staying at a hotel with my boyfriend in the meantime."
"Where's your otokooya?"
"Back in Mito. We... don't get along well these days."
"What happened?"
"That's none of your business."
L gives an approving nod.
"That was a good reaction, but keep in mind that there will be people you might need to trust with this information. What happened between yourself and your otokooya?"
I decide that I might as well work at the acting part of it. I sigh, tucking my legs up onto the couch and sinking back against it. I rub at the shaved patch of my hair.
"It was mostly my attitude towards my grades. Tousan wasn't upset that I couldn't keep up: it was the fact that I didn't care. Well, that I didn't care enough for his tastes. After my boyfriend and I got together, Tousan thought I was allowing my grades to slip as far down the rabbit hole as bloody possible. I guess getting into university here is my way of saying that I can still get approval without forcing myself to study something I can't wrap my mind around."
"And why did you stay with your boyfriend over your otokooya? You could've studied in Mito."
"That's mostly because I don't have to force anything to earn his approval."
"Could you explain?"
"Tousan... he needed me to fight and struggle through everything. If I wasn't losing sleep over something, I didn't care about it. My boyfriend, though... I don't have to prove anything to him. As long as I'm doing my best, he gives me his full support."
"I think that's enough for now. Go get some sleep."
I look out the window and see just how dark it is. I gnaw on my thumb.
"Is something wrong?"
"I won't be able to sleep."
"Unfamiliar places?"
"Partially that. Partially the fact that my body's stingy with the melatonin. I'm on medications for sleeping - naturally, Mr Yagami wouldn't bring it with him if we went to an art exhibition."
"I see. I'll speak to Watari about that. In the meantime, please try to sleep regardless. I'm the only person I know who can stay awake for more than twenty-four solid hours without showing signs of severe duress. The bed is all yours."
"Thanks, Ryuzaki, but... I'd rather try to help until I'm tired."
L looks up at me, eyes opened wide with interest. He then nods and pats the patch of couch next to him. I settle into the space and listen as he reels off the information and his theories thus far.