The building that held Aware Records was the most posh place I'd ever been. It made me, in my white, floaty, short dress and black Docs, feel seriously under dressed. Like I was a clear outsider, someone who didn't belong. I didn't let it bother me though - I was here for the music, that was all. The stuck up business people storming around us could get lost for all I cared.
Nate looked the same way - like he was considering punching someone in the face and running for it. I grinned at him, and then we made our way over to the huge, intimidating desk in the centre of the main reception. Everything seemed to be made of marble or glass.
There was a woman sat behind the desk. She looked to be about twenty two, with platinum blonde hair and sticky red lips. Her blouse showed enough cleavage to suffocate an unsuspecting victim. From the way Chris was eyeing her up, he obviously didn't find it as disgusting as I did. However, she was too busy flipping her hair in Nate's direction to notice. "Can I help you?" She asked, not even looking at the rest of us.
I don't care I don't care I don't care.
I cleared my throat. "Yeah, we're Kick the Crown. Here to see Elliot?"
She cast a glance my way. "Hm. I'll let him know you're here. If you could just take a seat, he'll see you in a second."
With another smile in Nate's direction, she indicated a set of plush, leather sofas in the corner of the reception.
With a few thank you's, we trooped towards them and settled ourselves on the posh seats. We looked incredibly out of place, in our jeans and clutching our battered guitar cases and drumsticks, surrounded by people in suits clutching briefcases.
I tried not to wince when my throat stung painfully. "This is..."
"Awkward." Nate finished. I tried not to read too much into the fact that he had opted for the seat next to me.
"Yeah," I said. "But we're here for the music. So it doesn't matter, does it?"
Nate shook his head, staring up at the incredibly high, chiseled ceiling.
Chris beat out a fast, complicated rhythm on the coffee table with his drumsticks. He kept sneaking looks back at the woman at the desk, but whenever she looked our way, it was only to wink or smack her lips in Nate's direction. It was like the rest of us were invisible.
I had a feeling of intense anticipation, sat there at Aware. Like this was the moment the guys and I were depending on. I just wished I was able to fully be a part of it like they were. Like I was supposed to be.
After about ten minutes, cleavage lady called over to us, "Mr John will see you now. I'll have David show you up."
A young man around my age bounded into action. He had light brown hair that seemed to catch flecks of light from the huge chandelier, and warm eyes that were just a shade darker. He wore a light grey suit with smart shoes, looking every bit the professional business man.
"Hi," He said, smiling at us. "If you'll follow me, please, I'll take you up to Mr John's office."
I grinned. "Thanks." And then jumped up and we took after him, over to a set of elevators. They, too, were made of marble and glass.
We waited in silence for a few minutes, and then a light appeared at the top of the door. They opened swiftly, and we trooped inside. It was cramped inside, what with the two guitars, and I found myself kind of squashed into David's side. He didn't seem to mind.
We exited the elevator on floor 19, and David led us down a corridor with carpet so thick I felt like I was sinking through the floor.
The guys trailed at the back, but I walked at the side of David. I was keen to know what it was like, working in such close proximity to musical legends. However, before I could ask him anything, he said something.
"So...I just want you to know that I hope everything goes well with Elliot." He said, smiling at me.
I blinked. "Thanks." I rubbed my throat a bit, feeling it sting.
"Yeah, I..um, I'm actually a big fan of you. The band, I mean." He muttered as we turned down another corridor.
I smiled. "Wow. Really?"
He nodded. "Yeah. I was at Zone and I catch up with you on the Internet whenever I have spare time."
I grinned. He was a fan! We actually had fans out there! Before I could voice my gratitude, we stopped outside the first door on a light, big, airy corridor.
"This is Mr John's office." David said, back to professional mode. He rapped on the door with his knuckles, and said "I'll be back to escort you down when you're done." For some reason, I was happy I would see him again.
I heard Elliot's voice call, "Enter!"
David smiled and said, "See you in a bit." Before making his way back down the corridor. I watched him go, until he turned a corner.
"Come on," Nate growled, pushing me into the office. "You can get his number later." He scowled, and I rolled my eyes.
The office was huge, at least three times bigger than Studio 4, back at Springbreak. Elliot was seated behind a massive mahogany desk, peering over a temple made by his fingers.
"Ah," He said, calmly. "How are you feeling, Lyra?"
I was kind of taken aback by the concern. "Um, I'm managing. Thanks."
He nodded, and then said, "I take it you want to start right away? There's no need for introductions, after all."
Nate nodded. "That's cool with us."
"Then you may proceed." Elliot said, motioning to the sound booth on the wall opposite. That too, was much bigger than Studio 4's.
The boys trooped inside, and Elliot indicated a seat for me on the sofa which faced the booth. I took it, fighting the urge to squirm away when he sat next to me.
The guys started with Here Comes The Sun, just for me. They played the best they ever had, and I found myself grinning with pride. The band were a part of me now, and seeing them play my song in a situation that our future career's depended on warmed my heart, as cliché as it sounds.
They went through some of their earlier stuff, the stuff that sounded the best for just the three of them. Bedshaped, by Keane was a favourite of mine, and it sounded better without me anyway. Nate's voice always sounded strong during that song, and I found my eyes glued to him.
I snuck a few glances at Elliot whilst they played. He seemed to be nodding in approval, or else didn't look like he total hated it.
The last song they played was Vertigo, by U2. I loved when they played that, because it showed just how good Freddie was on the guitar. And Nate sounded amazing, I suppose. There is that.
When they exited the booth, they looked at me first, like they wanted my approval before Elliot's. Like I was more important. For some reason, this brought tears to my eyes. Embarrassed by the open emotion I was showing, I gave them a thumbs up and a watery grin. Then I stared at the corner of Elliot's desk until the wobbly tears threatening to spill subsided.
We sat on four chairs before the desk, and Elliot leaned forward slightly, surveying us. "You already know you're amazing, don't you?"
The four of us nodded.
"But you do know you're not exactly current either, don't you?" He said, brushing his cuffs.
We nodded again, and Nate said, "Do you want to see the taped rehearsals with Lyra or are you going to just tell us straight?"
Chris glanced at him in a 'shut up!' kind of way, and Freddie gulped audibly, but I was glad Nate was being his conceited self. What was the use in pretences?
Elliot smiled slightly. "I don't need to see the tapes. I've already seen Lyra sing with you."
"We've improved since then." I rasped, my throat suddenly taking a turn for the worse.
Elliot shook his head. "You misunderstand. I mean, I saw your gig at Zone on the internet, thanks to a fan in your audience. I try to get all the info on potential bands."
I raised my eyebrows, impressed. "So?"
"So...You're talent is brilliant. But there isn't a market for bands who care about emotion rather than money." Elliot stated bluntly. "And the matter of your throat isn't to be taken lightly either, Miss Watson."
I scowled at him. "One month and two weeks. Then I'll be back to singing just like before."
"The industry doesn't wait, Lyra. Not for anyone." He said, folding his arms.
Nate butted in. "Then why not just gamble?"
"Excuse me?"
"Gamble. Take a chance on us. Either you're right and no one will pay any attention to us, or we'll make it big. It'll be one or the other." Nate said, raising an eyebrow in a way that made me shiver.
"We care more about our music than 95 percent of the world's biggest singers today. So you'll get everything you want out of us - work wise, that is. We'll do all we can." Chris said, glancing at me.
"Whether the public take it or not remains to be decided." Freddie added. "Only one way to find out how they'll respond though."
"And if you're in any doubt as to that, the audience from Zone should give you a pretty good idea." I finished, crossing my legs and staring him down.
Nate grinned. "Yes or no?"
"You may think you can just walk in here and tell me how its going to work, but I promise you that I am in charge," Elliot said. "And though you might not care about money or profit, I do. And if you don't pull in the kind of money I want, you'll be dropped so fast you won't even remember what being in a band feels like."
We sat in silence for a moment. Then I said, "So its a yes then?"
The rest of the meeting involved contracts being signed and words full of meaning that I didn't pay attention to. I was on a high - we were an officially signed band! This was the start - this was us beginning.
When Elliot dismissed us, and we headed back into the corridor, we found David waiting for us. "How'd it go?" He asked me, as he led us back down to the elevator.
I grinned. "Kick the Crown are officially a signed band!" I exclaimed, revelling in the sound of it.
"Great! So I'll be buying your album soon then?" He said, nudging me playfully. I laughed and shoved him back, but stopped when I heard Nate snort scornfully from behind us.
The ride back down to the reception was awkward to say the least. Chris and Freddie had huge smiles plastered to their faces, but Nate was shooting daggers at David, who was looking everywhere except him.
I stuck my tongue out at Nate when I thought he wasn't looking, but he showed me his middle finger in reply. Obviously much more receptive than I gave him credit for.
In the reception, the desk lady smiled at us (well, at Nate) and David stood by the doors as we filed out. When the guys were out of the doorway, I turned back to say goodbye to David. Before I could get a word out, he stopped me.
"Are you and Nate, like...a thing?" He asked, glancing at Nate's retreating back.
I laughed, but it sounded fake. "He has a girlfriend." I said. Then, realising this wasn't very convincing or answering his question, I added, "And I'm not interested in him. So no."
He nodded, looking pleased. "Well, good."
"Good?" I raised an eyebrow.
"I mean...Can I call you?" He asked, squinting at me knee.
I grinned. "Definitely." And I wrote my number on his hand with a pen from the desk lady. "Don't keep me waiting, alright?" I winked at him, before following the guys out of the building.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
That evening, I was back in my apartment. Gulping down some of the pain relieving medication for my throat, I turned the Fleetwood Mac CD that was playing in the background up. It had been a good day, I had decided. After all, Kick the Crown was signed now. And a really cute, nice guy had my number. Asking for more would be greedy.
If only I could sing...
Shut up, I told myself. Thoughts like that were the kind that would make the next month and two weeks drag like hell.
I smiled serenely as Go Your Own Way came on, a big favourite of mine. It made me feel peaceful, even though it was quite a negative song. I was just calming down from the excitement of the day, wearing some shorts and a sports bra because the temperature had rocketed upwards. Summer was much more intense in New York than England, and I was still getting used to it.
I pulled my hair up into a messy pony tail, and tried to resist singing along. God, it was so difficult. Especially when there was such a beautiful song playing. Fixing a ribbon around the pony tail, I huffed audibly. Life wasn't fair at the moment.
But I was suffering more than a raspy, aching throat and bruised ribs - revealed by the sports bra in a way that made me avoid all mirrors in the apartment - because I was having nightmares. Every night, for the past week, I had woken up in a sweat, terrified out of my mind. Every dream was the same, and yet it scared me out of my wits every time.
I was in a forest, and it was dark. Night time dark. And I was on my own, but I could hear music coming from somewhere. Here Comes The Sun, to be specific. Sung, not by the Beatles, but by Nate. His voice was so familiar now, I didn't have any trouble noting it. And I walked towards the general direction of the music - and I would trip over a twig or something.
And then the music would stop. In a way that made me aware of every other sound in the forest. Then there would be a sound - heavy breathing. And then I would feel it on the back of my neck - just like in all the horror stories. I would run, faster than I ever had in real life, but I would still be able to feel it. And then it'd stop, and so would I. Because Nate's voice would be back - but not singing. Screaming. Screaming for me to keep running.
So I would run and run and run, until I could feel my lungs bursting. And then, just as I'd feel like I was going to pass out, I'd wake up. Wake up screaming and sweating and crying.
I woke with a jolt, tears streaming and yelling at the top of my voice. I'd actually fallen asleep, and I'd had the dream yet again. Only this time, someone was here, someone was shouting over my screams, sat on the edge of the sofa where I'd fallen asleep.
Terrified, I slapped out, relieved when it made contact.
"OW! Lyra-Ly, stop, stop, stop!" He yelled, reaching out and grabbing my wrists.
"Nate?" I gasped, tears still pouring. "What-? What are you doing here?"
He released my wrists, pulling me up into sitting position. "I came to talk to you, and I heard you screaming, so I...broke in."
"You broke into my flat?" I gasped, between sobs.
"Well, what was I to think? You were screaming! Hey...Hey, don't cry, I'm sorry." He pulled me into his arms, but since we were both sitting down, it was more like I was sat in his lap. "Ssh," He crooned.
"I'm sorry," I sniffed into his chest.
He pulled me back and said, "Are you going to tell me what happened?"
I was suddenly very conscious of my shorts and sports bra. I tried to laugh it off, and said, "Oh, its nothing. Nothing, I swear.."
He scowled. "Don't give me that crap."
I wiped away my tears. "I'm sorry, I'm not normally so.."
"Hey, I know. I know you're not normally so...tearful and stuff. I know by now, Ly. Just tell me what's wrong and maybe I can help." He wiped away the remaining tear stains on my cheeks, and I closed my eyes.
"All the nightmares came today, and it looks as though they're here to stay." I quoted, wondering if he'd pick up on it.
He smiled, properly smiled, and sang, "Oh you pretty things, don't you know you're driving your mama's and papa's insane," and with every word, he got closer. Soon we were mere inches apart, and I could smell him everywhere. I gulped as his gaze flickered down, over my torso and legs.
I raised my eyebrows at him, trying not to let my gaze flick down to his lips. He smirked, his nose brushing mine. "Oh, come on." He breathed. "Its Bowie, of course I know it. Kind of fitting, isn't it?" This confused me. Was he saying I'm pretty? I was still kind of seated on him, and since my legs were bare, heat flared through me. His hand brushed my hip, and I shivered, wishing we were closer...
He pulled away. "Nightmares?"
I nodded, looking away.
"Don't be embarrassed, Ly. Everyone has nightmares." He said, soothingly.
I looked at him. "Even you?" I asked, childishly, blushing as I did.
He nodded. "Only sometimes, though."
I laughed shakily. "Alright, alright. I'm just being silly." I changed position, so I wasn't sat on his lap anymore, and stood up. I flicked Fleetwood Mac back on. "What did you come here for anyway?"
He grinned from his seat on the sofa, as I looked back at him from the CD player. "Well, seeing as Kick the Crown is an officially signed band..."
I laughed excitedly. "Yeah?"
"Elliot emailed me. He wants an original song by the time the album is set to come out." Nate said, stretching his arms over his head.
I ignored the way the action tensed his biceps. Well, tried to. "When's the album set to come out?"
"Its got to be ready in three months time. I know this is cutting it fine, what with your throat...but-"
"Nate, when I'm allowed to sing again, I'll be doing it all day every day. It'll be no rush, I promise." I said, grinning.
He stood up. "Well, I don't want you to strain yourself."
I waved away his concern. "Do you have any ideas for the original song?"
He nodded. "I've been writing some on and off for years. Some of them could work...but they're not brilliant, they're definitely lacking something."
I thought about it. "I've been writing for ages too. Maybe if we collaborated some ideas and stuff, something will come up?"
He shrugged. "We can start tomorrow. That is, if you're not seeing your new boyfriend?"
I scowled. "David isn't my boyfriend." I then realised he had sounded almost jealous, and added, "Yet."
He 'hmphed.' and said, "Either way, will you be at Springbreak?"
I rolled my eyes. "Am I ever not?"
"True. Bring your songs with you." He commanded, making his way to the door.
I nodded. "I will."
The door swung shut behind me, and I sat back down, closing my eyes as I listened to the CD and tried not to think about the fact that I would be writing songs with Nate. And we had just been closer than we ever had before. I shook my head, trying to dislodge the dangerous thoughts. He's happy with Robyn, I told myself. He isn't interested. Still... I could still feel his hand on my hip, and his arms around me.
I don't care I don't care I don't care.
_______________________________________________________
HEY!
This one took ages, but I'm pretty happy with it. As always, I hope you're enjoying it.
*If anyone cares, I suffered major emotional damage over the weekend. I watched Sherlock for the first time ... I'm hooked. As in, properly obsessed (In the kind of good way) and so the last episode of season two crushed me.
LOVE YOU ALL! XMX