The next time I woke up, I wasn't as cold anymore, but I still didn't feel right. There was something about the place I woke up in...it wasn't welcoming or warm like the house with Mother had been. It was dark and cold and scary, like the man who lived in it. When I looked around, I found that I had been sleeping in a bed. It was rather large. I wasn't used to being able to sleep in a bed. Usually, Mother let me sleep on the couch and she got to sleep on the bed. She told me it was because she didn't feel very good a lot of the time and she needed to sleep on the bed. I wanted Mother to sleep comfortably, so I let her sleep on the bed. I didn't mind the couch, but it was weird getting to sleep on an actual bed.
The warm, soft blanket was still around me and I didn't want to leave it, so as I got up to explore I took I with me, keeping it tightly wrapped around my shoulders. I explored the house, squeaking at how unexpected some of the things were. The man had sharp things on the walls. Mother would be very cautious and tell me not to touch them, so I stayed away from them.
I continued to look around, wondering where the man got all the sharp toys from. They looked very shiny even if they were scary, which meant he liked to play with them often. I wondered why he would need such big toys. Mother had little knives she used for cutting cheeses and bread. Sometimes she would let me sit next to her while she made me a sandwich. Bread and cheese sandwiches was my favorite meal Mother made me. She told me they were very yummy and I believed her. They were very yummy, and Mother was the best at making them. My stomach growled at the thought of food and I continued to wander the small house until I found something that looked like a pantry. I hadn't found the man, and I wondered if he had gone out somewhere. I didn't like the thought of being alone in the house.
Inside the pantry were fruits and vegetables and crackers. I took some crackers and munched on them as I walked throughout the rest of the house, looking for a place to sit and relax without being around the sharp objects. There were many things on the walls that I had never seen before. One of them looked like a bended stick with a string connecting the two ends, but I wasn't sure what it was. When I reached up to touch it, I found that it felt smooth. I finished my crackers but found myself still hungry. I didn't want to go back and take more food in case he got mad at me for not asking for permission first. It wasn't my food, even if I did want more of it.
I had just gone back into the bedroom I had woken up in when I heard a door open.
"Child?"
When I heard the man's voice, there was little I wanted to do more than hiding. I was afraid all of the sudden that he would get mad at me if he had found out I had eaten his crackers. Should I tell him? I was just hungry... I didn't take a lot... I was too busy worrying over whether or not the man would be angry I didn't notice he had walked into the room until he spoke.
"Are you hungry?" he asked. I looked up at him tentatively and nodded my head slowly. I was afraid if I said yes he would be mad, but he didn't. Instead, he handed me a wrapped sandwich. I stared at it dumbly before taking it.
I thanked him softly, avoiding eye contact, as I pulled back the wrapper covering the sandwich. I took a bite out of it, pleased to find that it was warm. I couldn't feel how warm it was through the wrapper, but everything inside of the sandwich was melted and yummy.
"Liliana," he said, and I looked up at the call of my name. I felt immediately paralyzed by his gaze. His eyes were dark, like he saw things other people didn't see. I wondered if he could see ghosts. "Do you know why you're here?"
I shook my head. He sighed and looked disappointed, but he didn't move to hit me. I relaxed.
"You're here because your mother is crazy," he said, and I bristled.
"Mama isn't crazy! Mama loves me!"
"No, really, she doesn't," he said. "She sold you to me for money. Do you know what that means, Liliana?"
I shook my head. Truthfully, I had no idea what it meant.
"It means that she paid me to take you away," he said, and I looked at him in confusion. "It means you are now my property. I own you, and I can do whatever I want with you."
"People don't own people," I said, immediately regretting my words when his expression turned angry. "Please don't be angry..."
"I own you, Liliana. I can do whatever I want with you. Luckily for you, I don't want to kill you. I want to train you. I've lived alone for a very, very long time, and I've never once considered hiring someone to work with me. But I paid real money for you and I'm going to train you long and hard. You'll be just as good as I am when I'm done with you."
"What are you gonna train me for?"
"Being an assassin."
"An...ass...ass-ass-in?"
He snorted as if I had said something funny. "Yes, an assassin. Do you know what assassins do?"
"No..." I had never heard the word before. Assassin? Did that mean that you liked donkeys? A lot?
"Assassins kill people for a living."
I stared at him in horror, almost dropping my food. "No! Mama wouldn't want me to kill people... I don't wanna do it! You can't make me!"
The man drew nearer and snatched the sandwich out of my hand. I flinched and covered my face with my hands, but I didn't feel a blow. The moment I relaxed and peeked out from underneath my arms, the man grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled me to my feet. My sandwich was on the floor and lettuce and cheese was spilled across it. My stomach growled despite being afraid.
"You don't get to choose what you do and do not want to do," he growled. "I am the one who dictates what you do and do not do now, no one else. Not you, not your Mama. Your Mama is gone. You are never going to see her again. Get used to that, do you understand me?"
I started to cry. "Why? Why did Mama let me go? I want to see Mama again..."
"No!" he shouted, shaking me. The tears started to fall faster. "You're going to be an assassin, do you hear me? And you're going to be the best damn assassin that you can be, because I am the one training you. You don't have an option. Do you understand me?"
I nodded even though I didn't. He dropped me on the floor and I let out a cry when I hit it. He stormed out of the room and slammed the door behind him, the entirety of the room shaking with the force of it. I looked at my sandwich on the floor. A little mouse had run out from under somewhere and was nibbling on the cheese that had gone flying from it. I reached over and grabbed what sandwich was still in the wrapper, curling up against the wall and nibbling on it slowly. My bum hurt from being thrown so forcefully onto the floor, and tears still welled in my eyes. The mouse stared at me with its small eyes as it ate. I took a piece of cheese from my sandwich and threw it towards the mouse. At first, it scampered off before coming back and eating the cheese. Slowly it got closer and I stayed still as it did so, watching it intently. Its little nose sniffed the air in rapid motions and I sniffed along with it before wiping my nose along my arm.
"Do you have friends?" I asked it. The mouse tilted its head and looked down at my sandwich. I took off another piece of cheese and this time, instead of throwing it towards the mouse, I held it in between my fingers. It looked afraid. "It's okay, I'm scared too. This man is mean and he likes to hurt people... he wants me to kill people, too..." the words were so easy to say it scared me. I didn't want to be like that man. His eyes were cold and dark and I didn't want my eyes to look like his. I didn't want to hurt people. I liked people. Mother said that she didn't like people very much, but people had never treated Mother very nicely. I knew an old man once that liked to give me peaches. He was a very nice old man, even if Mother didn't think so. He was one of the reasons why I liked people so much. I didn't want to hurt anyone. No one had ever been too mean to me before.
Maybe the man was joking. Maybe he wasn't actually going to make me kill people.
The mouse came over to my fingers and started to eat the cheese, its pink paws holding onto the edges of it as it ate. "Are you afraid of people? I'm afraid of people like him. He told me Mama paid him to take me away, but I don't know what that means. Mama wouldn't sell me, would she? He wants me to be an... an... ass-assin. Assassin. They hurt people, little mouse. I don't want to hurt people." I reached forward with one finger and patted the top of the mouse's head gently. It squeaked and ripped whatever cheese it could away from my fingers and ran underneath the bed.
"Mouse? Please don't leave... I don't want to be alone..."
I didn't see the mouse again after that.
~*&*~
It was dark before I saw the man again. I had finished the sandwich even though I had lost my appetite after being thrown on the floor. There was a sinking feeling in my tummy and I wanted it to go away. I didn't feel very good and I wanted to go back to sleep. I had wrapped myself in the blanket again after finishing my food, but I hadn't fallen asleep again, even though I was very tired. I just wanted my mouse friend to come back. Only... I didn't think the mouse was going to come back. I had scared it away, just like Ceseth scared me.
"Liliana," he said as he entered the room, so silently that if he hadn't spoken I wouldn't have known he was there. I wished I was that quiet. If I was that quiet, it would be easy for me to run away. But he might find me if I tried. "Get used to this kind of meal."
I didn't say anything, preferring to keep my mouth shut over saying something that might make him angry again. I didn't want to talk to him anyways. If my little mouse friend came back, I'd talk to the mouse. I wanted the mouse to return so badly. He made me feel less lonely.
"I'm also going to start teaching you lessons on a daily basis. The lessons will teach you all about being an assassin. I'm also going to make you exercise more. You won't be in this room very often: only to sleep. And even then you should get used to sleeping for one or two hours every night. An assassin always needs to be able to function on an hour of sleep at most. We'll begin tomorrow." He turned around and began to walk out, but he stopped at the doorway and looked back at me. "Oh, and tomorrow, we'll also be changing your name."
"Change my name?" I asked. "I like my name..."
"I don't care; your name is too soft. I'll think of something more befitting of an assassin."
"But—"
"Speak only when spoken to," he said, anger coming back into his voice. I shrunk further into the blanket. "Go to bed. You've got a long day ahead of you tomorrow."