I can't look at Noah when he walks into my room holding a glass of orange juice and a bottle of advil. I look at everything but him.
"Here," he murmurs.
I take it and thank him. He stands there. It's awkward and silent and uncomfortable.
I sigh. "I was drunk."
"What?"
"Last night. I was drunk. I didn't even realize I flashed you my boobs until after you left. I wasn't trying to hit on you or come onto you. Forget everything I said and did. I was drunk."
He blinks. "Yeah. Are you dating that guy?"
"Clifford?"
"Yes. Him."
"No. He's like my best friend."
"Oh."
It's quiet. He scratches his head.
"Look, I'm going to be honest for a minute." He takes a deep breath. "Last night? That can't happen again."
"I know. I was drunk; I'm sorry. I really wasn't trying to make you uncomfortable."
"Parker, you looked amazing last night. And the thoughts that ran through my head..." He shakes his head and I shiver. "And then you start to take of the dress and—"
"Sorry," I wince.
"I have a girlfriend. I can't think about you like that. But I can't get the image out of my head."
"Okay, Noah," I clear my throat. "I solemnly swear to never flash you again. Can we just move past it?"
He hesitates before nodded. "Yeah. We should. It's forgotten. You got any plans today?"
"Actually–"
For the second time, the doorbell interrupts us. Noah smiles sheepishly before leaving the room to answer the door. I take a pill, finish off the orange juice, and stand up to see who's downstairs.
As I come down the steps, I narrow my eyes at the messy blonde hair.
"Cliff?"
"You're up," he smiles. "How you feeling?"
I smile back and walk towards him. Cliff steps inside, just enough to reach me.
"I'm good," I reply, hugging him. "Thank you for bringing me home."
He nods. "'Course."
"You hungry?" I question, taking his hand and pulling him into the kitchen. "I'm going to make breakfast."
"You cook?" Noah asks, surprised.
"No," Cliff and I say simultaneously. We look at each other and laugh. Noah blinks.
I go to a cabinet and pull out three bowls and then move to the cabinet with all the cereal.
"How long have you guys known each other?"
"Since, what, middle school?" Cliff glances at me for confirmation and I nod in affirmative. "Eighth grade. I was a transfer."
"Oh. Transferred why?"
Cliff laughs. "After I got kicked out my old school I needed to be put in a different school."
"Kicked out?" Noah raises an eyebrow. "For what?"
"Stupid shit. Fights." Clifford shrugs. "I was failing all my classes because I was behind and didn't understand anything. But Parker..."
He grins at me. I smile, recalling how we met.
"She helped me. They said I need a tutor but because my mom couldn't afford to pay for one, I was assigned to one in school."
"Parker?" Noah glances at me.
"She was like the top student in the entire school. Her grades were perfect." He shakes his head. "She tutored me, and my grades started to rise. She kept me on track, made sure I was always getting my shit done. Fucking savior. I went from an F to a C in one semester."
"He just needed someone to be there." I look at Cliff. "We were there for each other."
Noah frowns. "What do you mean?"
"That was around the time her parents–"
I clear my throat loudly, stopping Cliff from saying anything. He looks at me and I shake my head. He looks back at Noah.
"Let's just say neither one of us lived as great as you did," Clifford says.
Noah's jaw sets. I bring the bowls of cereal to the island and pour milk into my bowl.
I tilt it over Noah's bowl. "Say when."
"When," he murmurs, once I've poured enough.
Cliff takes the container from my hand and pours it himself.
"So you were a nerd?" Noah says jokingly, looking at me.
I scoff. "Hardly."
"No, Parker was a badass." Cliff spoons some cereal in his mouth and chews slowly. "Real fucking badass."
I wasn't. Clifford would get me in all kinds of trouble. He's the one who gave me my first joint. Though I hadn't taken any real hard drugs until I met Marie, he was my gateway. He introduced me to Marie and to Johnny.
I hear a vibrating noise and Cliff pulls his phone out his pocket, answering it.
He raises an eyebrow. "I'm with her. Yeah." He glances at me. "Hold on."
He pulls the phone away from his ear. "Parker, I got the stuff. Marie wants to..."
I nod. "Where is she?"
"Her house."
"Her mom?"
"Went to Atlantic City with a friend. We're good."
Noah looks between us, confused. "What stuff?"
Cliff glances at me and I tapped the counter twice with my index finer. No. He looks back at Noah.
"Nothing."
Noah looks at me and I look away. He sighs.
"You're leaving?"
"I'm going to shower. Cliff, you can hang out in my room."
"Cool."
My eyes meet Noah's. I nearly melt at how green are. Green's my new favorite color. "You good?"
"I'm great."
I smile and nod. "Come on, Clifford."
We go upstairs to my room. I shower quickly, not wanting to leave Cliff alone for too long. I know he wouldn't do anything to me, but Noah is a stranger to him. Cliff is surrounded by nice thins that are worth more than his aunt's apartment. I trust him, but Noah shouldn't. At least, he shouldn't trust him enough to leave him alone in this house for a long period of time. Things could go missing. I get out the shower and dress in the bathroom, pulling on dark grey sweatpants and a tank top. I pull on a sweater over it and step out to see Cliff laying on the bed, staring at the ceiling. He turns his head to the side and looks at me when he hears the door open.
"Can't believe you live here."
"Yeah."
"For how long?"
"I'm saving up for a new place. Hopefully better than my last one."
He shakes his head. "Greg's an asshole."
"It doesn't matter now."
He sits up and watches me plop down at the desk chair. "Can you imagine what our lives would be like if we had parents with all this money?"
I had tried to imagine it. Noah and his friends don't even realize how lucky they are. They don't have to worry about anything. College? Already paid for. Future? Already set. They live in eternal bliss.
"Rich Boy's got it good."
"What'd Johnny give you?"
"Bag each." He reaches into his jacket pocket but stops short when my bedroom door opens.
"I'm headed out," Noah says, green eyes meeting mine. "To Amber's. I won't be back tonight."
"Oh, shit" Clifford grins. "She got any hot friends I can spend the night with?"
"No." He turns to look at me, basically dismissing Clifford. "There's a spare key on the counter in the kitchen, okay?"
I nod. "Have a good night."
He nods.
The second the door closes, Clifford jumps up. "Fuck Marie's house. She can come here. We're about to have a fucking party."