Bam! Another chapter. So I think I like this one a lot more than the last one and this one is all Zayn's POV! I know you guys wanted more of it so here you go. It also gives a little more insight on Zayn's past and all of that stuff. So I hope you enjoy this! I love you guys! - Sami. <3
Chapter Eighteen:
Zayn's POV:
I looked down at my phone and saw that it was now 11:37 pm. Harry had texted me quite a while (like 4 hours) ago and it kinda pissed me off that he would just stand me up like this. I wasn't upset that I was up waiting for him because honestly I wouldn't have been able to sleep after that fight anyway but I just really thought that we should talk it all out. We were both pretty heated during our argument and I didn't want this whole thing to remain unresolved. When he said that he wanted to break up with me it just hit me so hard that I had to lash out at him. That's just how I had grown up to be. Every single person in my life would leave me at some point and I was just so mad that he wanted to leave so soon. I didn't think that me yelling at him was going to make him so upset. I just didn't want him to get hurt because of me but I guess he didn't see it that way. I didn't want to lose Harry. I couldn't lose him.
I walked out from under my bridge and laid down on the grass beside it. I looked up at the stars and closed my eyes, smiling when I pictured Harry's face in my mind. His beautiful green eyes were shining brighter than any of those stars and his smile was the most gorgeous one I had ever laid my eyes on. And those curls...those curls were just the icing on the cake. I loved the way he would shake his head and push his bangs to the side when he wanted to fix it. It was so weird to me that such a wispy mess could complete the adorable boy's perfection. If anyone else did their hair like that I would just think they were a mess but not Harry. Not my Hazza. I could never think that about him. He was the only person these days that could make me genuinely happy all of the time. Of course my little sister Safaa could too but I couldn't see her very often.
I remember the day I had to give her to my grandpa. It was devastating.
(Flashback)
"But Zayn I don't want to leave." My little sister was looking up at me with her big brown eyes and it was so hard not to just pick her up and take her back inside.
I pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, "I know Bear but you have to."
"But I want to stay with you.", I could see the tears forming in her eyes and it was killing me.
I pulled her into a big hug and whispered, "I know baby girl but we'll see each other all of the time. I promise I'll come visit you whenever I can. It's just best that you go stay with grandpa for now. It's what's best for you."
I knew that she was confused as to why she had to go away. Of course she was. She was only a little 4 year old girl. She couldn't understand that her mother had gotten severely addicted to drugs and her father was an abusive drunk. I wouldn't even know how to explain such things to her so I did the only thing I knew that was safe for her. I knew that my grandparents would take care of her and give her all of the love that my stupid parents wouldn't.
Neither of us said anything for a while until I heard my grandparent's car pull up into the driveway. "Grandma and Grandpa are here now Bear. It's time to go."
She wouldn't let go of me though and I could feel my shirt becoming wet with her tears. I picked her up with one arm and then grabbed her suitcase with the other one. My grandfather got out of the car and opened up the back door so I could set her in. I put her bag on the ground and squeezed her tight before giving her a kiss on the cheek and setting her down in the car seat in the back of the car. I buckled her in and put her bag on the seat next to her.
I grabbed her hand and looked her in the eyes, "I love you Bear. Be good for Grandma and Grandpa ok?"
She nodded and I gave her one more hug, "I love you Zaynie."
I pulled back from her embrace and slowly closed the door of the car and watched it drive down the street. I stood there for a few more minutes watching my life drive farther and farther away from me. And that was the first time I had cried since the very first hit my dad sent to my eye.
(Flashback Ended)
I frowned at the terrible memory of practically losing the only thing that made me happy in my life. But things had gotten better since I met Harry and I so badly just wanted to run into his arms and feel his warm embrace. I sighed and grabbed a cigarette out of my pocket. Just when I was about to light it my phone began to vibrate in my pocket.
I groaned, "This better not be Josh. I am not in the mood right now."
But as I looked down at my screen I realized that it was a number I didn't recognize. I slid my finger across the screen and asked, "Hello?"
"Zayn! Zayn is that you?"
The voice sounded frantic and I knew it but I wasn't quite sure from where. "Yes. This is Zayn. May I ask who this is?"
"It's Anne."
"Oh. Hi Anne. Is everything ok?"
A sob erupted from her, "No Zayn. It's H-Harry."
Suddenly I was on high alert and I was already beginning to panic, "Harry? What? Is he ok?"
"He's been in an accident Zayn. We're at the hospital. He's in surgery right now but the doctor said we should be able to see him when it's over."
"I'll be there as soon as I can!"
Without a second thought I hung up my phone and started sprinting to the hospital. It was about 4 miles away from the park and I knew if I didn't stop to rest that I could make it there in less than 30 minutes. I ran and ran until I saw the doors to the ER and when I got inside I saw Harry's parents sitting in the waiting room. His mum was sleeping on his dad's shoulder with an exhausted look on her face. I could tell that she had been crying quite a bit from the redness around her eyes. I leaned up against the wall and began breathing in and out as well as I could. Harry's dad spotted me and gave me a quick smile then patted the chair next to him. I walked over and plunked down into the chair that he had offered me.
"I got here" breath "as fast as" breath "I could." Breath.
"Did you run all the way here?" I nodded. "Where were you?"
"The park."
"Wow. That was fast."
I nodded again and asked, "What happened?"
He sighed, "Harry texted his mum this afternoon saying that he was going to the mall and I guess on his way back a drunk driver ran a red light and smashed into Harry's car. It was on the passenger's side so we're lucky about that but the doctor said that he's in pretty bad condition. He's in surgery now for something. I don't know what it is. They're not telling us anything."
I ran my hands through my hair and sighed, "This is all my fault."
He raised an eyebrow, "How could that be possible?"
"Harry and I got into an argument earlier in the park and he started yelling and said that we should break up so I just yelled back and said fine and walked off. I shouldn't have yelled at him about anything. If I wouldn't have then we would've just stayed at the park and done homework or something like he always wants to but he left instead."
"Zayn, did you get that driver drunk?"
"Well no but-"
"Then this couldn't possibly be your fault."
I shrugged, "I guess."
He put his hand on my shoulder, "Don't blame yourself for any of this. You are not the one at fault here."
I nodded, "Thanks." We sat in silence for a few seconds and I asked, "So when do we get to see him?"
"Not sure yet. Hopefully the surgery goes well."
"Hopefully."
The three of us had been sitting in the damn waiting room for about 7 hours and time couldn't possibly go any slower. I had tried to pass the time by falling asleep but it just wouldn't happen. Even though I was exhausted mentally and physically my brain would just not let me have any sleep. His parents slept on and off for some time until they just couldn't handle the stress anymore. Anne had gotten up a few times to find a nurse and ask them if they knew anything about Harry's condition but none of them had a clue. Finally when we were all ready to just scream at every nurse in the hospital to give us some information a nice young female nurse with brown hair came up to us.
"Are you all here for Harry?" We all nodded quickly and she continued, "He's out of surgery now and you can go see him if you want but you're going to have to be very quiet and don't crowd him too much."
All of us got out of our seats and followed the nurse into the room that Harry was supposedly in. When she opened the door I had to hold tears back. Harry was lying in a hospital bed with all sorts of wires and machines hooked up to him. He had an oxygen mask on and there was a heart monitor beeping from the other side of the room. There were bandages all over his body and I saw that they had cut some of his hair off for some reason. Probably to get rid of the blood that was in it. Anne caressed his cheek and his eyes started to flutter a bit.
"M-mum? Where am I?" His voice sounded frail and full of confusion and it made me want to cry.
She petted his arm in a comforting way and whispered, "Shh. Get some rest baby. We'll talk about this more later."
And then he said something that made me freeze up, "Where's Zayn?"
"Zayn's here sweetie." She motioned for me to come over but I was frozen in the door way of the room. "Come on Zayn. It's alright."
I slowly moved over to the hospital bed and kneeled down next to Harry, "Hey Hazza."
He smiled a bit, "Hey Zaynie."
I couldn't help but smile at the nickname. It made my heart flutter and seeing him up close was worse than from afar. He looked absolutely wrecked and I suddenly wished that it was me lying in a hospital bed confused and exhausted.
I took his hand in mine and rubbed my thumb over the back of it. "You should get some sleep Haz."
"We need to talk." I could hear the sleepiness in his voice now and I could tell he wouldn't be able to stay up for much longer.
"We'll talk when you wake up love. I promise."
He just nodded and I placed a soft kiss to his temple and watched him slowly fall into a deep sleep. We could talk about everything that happened some other time. Right now I just wanted to enjoy the fact that I could still hear the faint breathing of my hopefully not ex-boyfriend.