OVER THE COURSE of the next half hour I tell them about everything the breach, the missing women, the white wolf's involvement, the pictures. They sit in stunned silence for the most part with only the occasion gasp of horror or strangled wail of sympathy. I wrap up my deliverance with an update on the mates we have in medically induced comas in the clinic and our current search for clues near the river.
I hold my breath waiting for their reaction. A few beats of quiet pass and all I receive are creepy vacant stares. Everyone appears to be in shock no one seems to even be breathing at this point. I open my mouth to continue but halt when the hairs on my arm ominously rise in warning. The air starts to crackle with tension and their faces morph into various countenance of outrage. Within the next breath complete chaos erupts.
All at once they begin yelling out. Their voices rising to a fevered pitch weaving together and overlapping to create a almighty roar.
Members jump to their feet some point at me accusingly their faces twisted in rage while others look at me in fright and betrayal. The scared ones shout out what I believe are questions but the noise is so loud now I can't differentiate between the voices and weed out any one word. My sensitive ears quiver and I recoil in pain. I grip the podium and raise my voice to speak over them.
"One at a time please. I can't understand you. I will answer any questions you have but you have to calm down. There's no need to panic!"
My words are muffled and drowned out. I don't think anyone heard a thing. My skin begins to itch as my wolf prepares to break free the more rowdy the crowd gets. I feel her anxiously waiting as their fear and anger mix together in the atmosphere creating a very dangerous environment for us werewolves.
I see James and Dallas have moved away from the stage and are making their way down the aisles attempting to quiet down the crowd. They sneer at Dallas blatantly ignoring his requests but for James it's a complete contrast you can tell his authority has more weight and many of the members actually listen to him submitting to the more dominant wolf but there's just too many to handle and James eventually gives up and rushes back to the stage.
He waves his arms to get my attention then points at me repeatedly. No, not at me I realize but the podium. I tap it just to be sure. He nods then points downward.
Confused I bend down and peer into the stand. On the inner shelf I see a familiar megaphone. We use to use it at different events years ago before I had microphones and a premium surround sound system installed. James must have found it backstage somewhere and placed it here as an contingency. I pick it up and inspect it. It seems functioning although it hasn't been used in a while, but I don't even think this thing will be loud enough to be heard over the mayhem.
I look back at James shaking my head denoting it's uselessness.
He points at it again specifically the top of it. I glance down and see a bright red button. I look back up and he's now pointing at the small mic on the podium.
I know exactly what that button does. I've accidentally pressed it once or twice, I blanch in remembrance. Technically, it's an emergency siren that's used to alert people to your whereabouts if you're ever in any danger. When pressed it releases a loud shrill scream ten times worse than nails on a chalk board. It can be heard from up to a mile away. Of course it's more common use is to gain attention from a distracted crowd. I quickly understand his meaning and smile gratefully.
I flip the power switch to the on position, luckily it still has juice. I crank the volume all the way up, aiming the opening towards my mic. I wince in preparation hoping my baby will be fine and press the button.
Immediately, a horrid piercing screech fills the air enough to make the back of your teeth uncomfortably ache and your eardrums threaten to burst and bleed. The loud shouts cease and the whimpers begins as everyone hurries to cover their hypersensitive ears in hopes of warding out the offending sound.
I shut off the megaphone after a couple of seconds, the noise level a lot more manageable now dispute a few grumbles. I lift my hands in the air attempting to silence their complaining.
"Thank- " I begin but James cuts me off.
"Please everyone you need to calm down."
What the hell is he doing?
"I know the information we have to share is troubling and frightening. Emotions are high and you all want answers but you're acting foolish!" he shouts over them his fists clenches at his sides his irritation making his voice quake. Now that they've regained their cool they look at him in surprise at his insult.
"You are and you know it. Look at yourselves you're getting way out of line, you're disrespecting our Alpha, and I can feel a few of your wolves coming out. You have to control yourselves or this situation can become deadly in a heartbeat. You're behaving like rogues and you're better than that. We have elderly members and pregnant women in here they could get hurt."
He nods towards the front row where Lola, another pregnant woman, sits protectively holding her belly looking petrified while her mate Thomas holds her protectively.
Expressions of shame immediately cross their faces and they bow their heads to him.
"Just settle down and Let the Alpha speak I promise she will address all of your concerns."
He motions for everyone to sit down and sure enough they slowly sit and settle but with an obvious air of reluctance and impatience.
How fucking dare he?!
I can't believe he just did that. He completely overstepped his position and undermined my authority. I could have handled them just fine. Though happy for his assistance with the megaphone his little speech was irrelevant. I'm the Alpha this is my meeting to conduct and my pack to command. He interrupted me as if I should wait for his permission to speak.
All eyes are on James and I can clearly see the respect the pack has developed for him since his arrival, a respect I haven't seen shine at me in months. I realize with a start that this is James's pack now and he is the only reason they backed down. Truthfully they probably wouldn't have even listened to me if I tried to calm them. My father would be so disappointed in me.
I look over to Dallas and see the same mortification I feel flashing in eyes despite his indifferent demeanor. We have both failed in our responsibilities.
James turns around and smiles sheepishly at me. I see guilt in his eyes and know he must have come to the same conclusion as me thus why he stepped in. I bite back my annoyance and gaze out at the crowd. With his endorsement they are completely focused on me now. I begin the first act in earning their respect back.
"I called this meeting tonight mainly to address the rumors going on around the pack after the-the..." I pause having a hard time getting the next words out. I clear my throat which is currently trying to clog with emotions and push the words out on a sad sigh.
"The horrible screams the other night. I want to assure you we have everything under control. I know you've all felt the discord through the pack bond but I believe it's more from lack of information and communication than anything else so I want you to know all the facts."
"Are we safe Alpha?" Lola speaks up urgently. Her soft brown doe-like eyes full of trepidation for her growing family.
"Yes we are all safe. We have every entrance to Red Dawn locked down. We have double the guards stationed around the border and we also have them patrolling inside of the territory 24/7. We aren't taking anymore chances with our safety."
A rude snort and a mumbled "kinda late for that" can be heard coming from three rows behind Lola. Heads swing in the speaker's direction.
Ugh Bryce.
A annoying thorn in my side since before I was given the title of Alpha. He sits indignantly with his arms folded for all the world looking in charge. A former adviser of my father who thinks he should be Alpha because of his experience and age. He never misses a chance to criticize my actions to others and giving the current events he now has lots of ammunition and a stage to do a lot of damage.
"Do you have a question Bryce?" I ask with a tight smile. I really don't want to hear what this asshole has to say but I must not be bias.
Bryce sits up straight and uncrosses his arms. He lifts his chin high in defiance without an ounce of submission, a obvious snub of my position.
Yep its time for another one of his Anti-Amber productions. I mentally roll my eyes and steel myself preparing for the worse.
"I do actually Alpha. I was just wondering about the progress of getting our poor females back. I would be happy to join any search parties. Do you have any leads to where they are?" Bryce asks his face a mask of false concern and determination.
Shit
A blush creeps up my neck as I begin to stutter trying to find a way to explain that I was ignorant of any new details without looking ridiculous. After my meeting with Dallas early I was depleted of strength and just went to take a nap afterwards so I hadn't had a chance to talk to James and Jared about what they found at the river.
"Well um we haven't exactly d-d-discussed anything ye-"
Bryce's cruel laughter interrupts me echoing through the room. He shakes his held in false pity.
"You don't know anything do you?" he shrugs his shoulders dramatically.
"It's not really surprising. I guess you've been too busy gallivanting around with that one." He spits in contempt jerking his thumb in Dallas direction.
"Watch it Bryce" Dallas growls baring his fangs a murderous glint in his eyes. Bryce places a hand on his chest innocently.
"I speak the truth. We've all seen you two, it's a disgrace for a mated Alpha to behave the way she has and you're no better Beta panting after her like a horny child. Maybe if you two were more focused on Red Dawn you could have prevented this."
"We're not dealing with your typical rogues. They breached are defenses quickly and cleverly. There was no preventing this. There were no tip-offs" Dallas's response causes a pleased smile to spread across Bryce'e thin lips.
"Really because from what I hear you were warned and you just chose to ignore it." Bryce sits back smugly reveling in the crowds immediate reaction of his statement. Gasps ring out and aghast murmurings flow all around.
"Is that true Alpha?" a gravely withered voice ask, I turn the left of me. A little ways back I see Douglas, one of our more elderly pack mates and one of my most loyalist members. He's standing rather unsteady holding on to the chair in front of him for support. His gaze a combination of dread and sadness as if I had committed the ultimate act of treason.
"There were no definitive signs Douglas. I couldn't put much weight on the information I received" I reply gently he nods his head but I can see he doesn't fully accept my answer.
"Definitive!?" Bryce yells bringing the attention back to him. He's now on his feet as well. "What kind of a lazy excuse is that? Shouldn't you have acted no matter how insignificant the signs seemed? Why the hell would you take the chance with our lives Alpha?" he seethes reciting my title with mock respect.
"Rogues are filthy and clumsy. They leave evidence of their presence everywhere there go. There was nothing of their presence. " I defend glaring at Bryce.
A sharp inhale followed by a short screech silences whatever he is about to say.
"My babies!" Mandy has her hands pressed against her trembling lips her eyes wide in terror.
"The day of the tournament. The ghost the girls said they saw in the woods. It could have been a rogue. He could have harmed my babies!"
The volume and tension starts to rise again as everyone debate the legitimacy of her claim.
"Lets not jump to conclusions. Remember I said facts." I reason and get completely ignored.
"They've probably been here scoping out our territory!" a member in the back of the auditorium surmises.
"How long have they had access to us?" Thomas asks angrily holding Lola closer.
"If what Mandy said is true they've been watching us for weeks and no one except two little girls had a clue!" Jacob Mandy's brother demands consoling his weeping sister.
"Renee knew" Bryce corrects.
I stare at him in shock completely taken aback. How does he know about that? My mind tracing back to the only time her knowledge of the possibility of intruders was voiced.
Bryce must have heard us arguing the day I refused to hear James out about more security. Things got heated during that meeting and the argument was fairly loud. It would have been no problem for someone to overhear us if they were passing by or intentionally eavesdropping which I'm more inclined to believe Bryce may have done. Many times throughout the years I've caught him sneaking around Red Dawn searching, I'm sure, for some dirt on me and it seems he has finally got some.
His eyes narrow condescendingly daring me to contradict his allegation. I subtly bite my lip scrambling to come up with a reasonable response. I can't very well lie he could have further evidence.
A hush covers the crowd as one by one everyone turns to where Renee is sitting. Whoa she looks a mess. What the hell happened to her?
Renee's eyes widen at the sudden attention and I see her sink lower into her chair at the suspicious and less than friendly stares. Once a rogue always a rogue is motto that runs deep with many werewolves.
"Hey!" James hastens
over to her aisle glaring around at the people closes to her.
"Leave. Her. Alone" he snarls the sound coming from deep within his chest. His eyes glow slightly and his posture exudes a deadly readiness to attack and no one could misunderstand the look in his eyes. It's as clear as if he said it out loud.
If you touch her I will kill you.
"Don't get any ideas. Renee had nothing to do with this. She just relayed her suspicions that's it. If any of you have a problem with her you come to me. I'm sure I can change your mind" his threat is heard loud and clear. Everyone quickly nods backing down and looking away posthaste.
"Renee isn't the problem" Bryce exasperated words bring the attention once again back to him.
I notice James relax, the glow in his eyes fading away. He releases a heavy sigh his relief practically tangible. Now that no one is showing Renee any hostility he retakes his position at the front of the stage but not before he sends her a little flirty wink that makes my heart clench.
"My point is things have been handled very poorly around here and it's about time someone calls the cause out on her ineptness.
Besides, anyone that would cheat on their True Mate doesn't have any integrity, spits on our pack values makes poor decisions, and frankly doesn't deserve to lead us."
My face heats up with embarrassment. I notice James's stiffen his profile displaying his discomfort as he watches Bryce freely air out our dirty laundry. It's not exactly a secret the packs disdain for my current.......predicament, but no one has been brave enough to voice their opinion so publicly.
"This isn't the time to discuss my personal-"
"Every since you two have been playing house things have gone to crap! Morale is down and you've made poor decisions that have lead to ours member being kidnapped, raped, and tortured. This is serious not something that can be brushed under the rug. I for one don't trust the two of you any longer!"
There are immediate shouts of agreement from every direction. The pack stares at Dallas and I with distaste, their eyes blazing. I read their intent fluently. They seek to dethrone me and they're angry enough to do it by force.
My fight or flight instincts begin to stir. I know I've done wrong and I've mad shitty mistakes that I can't ever take back but I'm a damn good Alpha and no will be taking my title without a fight. I stand my ground and stare them down defiantly.
"We need a new leader one with maturity who has participated in and counseled Red Dawn decisions for years. We need a man who has helped to make our pack the great place it is today!"
He thrusts his fist in the air for extra dramatics. It doesn't take a genius to realize he's referring to himself but his suggestion backfires as shouts for James begin. His stunned sour face is priceless.
James looks around outwardly unsettled by their chants. Dallas on the other hand has finally had enough of the craziness and climbs up on the stage.
"Our relationship has nothing to do with anything. Amber and I have been leading this pack for years. We've never let you down before. Give us a chance to fix this." Dallas pleads but their beyond being rational. They're scarred and want someone to release their frustrations on.
"Nothing this big has ever happened it's just been random rogue breaches until now. For all we know you two were never truly worthy of your positions." Thomas yells.
Enthusiastic calls of agreement and nasty names like slut and cheaters are thrown at us without abandon. On the outside I stand strong in the face of their cruel accusations but on the inside each insult hits its mark effectively cracking my wall of indifference.
James gets up with us on the stage and their jeers promptly turn in cheers.
"I see you've effectively turned them against us" Dallas sneers at James's back.
"I believe that was all your doing" James snaps back over his shoulder then waves his hands to silence the crowd.
"I don't want your applause. I need you to quiet down and hear me out." They cease their exuberance and the room grows quiet.
"I've been hearing rumors going around about how many of you want me to step up as Alpha.
Claps and praise start up again but James's face remains stoic and he appears to be a little pissed off.
"I want to address this topic once and for all and let it be the end of it. I'm glad you think I'm up to the task but the truth is I'm no leader. I have no desire to be Alpha. The only reason I'm excelling in your eyes as Beta is because I'm following the lead of Amber. I don't really know what I'm doing. She's the real Alpha here." He looks over to me and smiles.
"You all need someone whose caring, protective, intelligent, wise, strong, confident and fair. Amber is all of that and more, none of you can truly deny it or convince me otherwise.
I know in lew of our situation you view her differently but she hasn't changed just our opinion of her because of stupid mistakes and petty emotions. Even I'm guilty of seeing her in a new light but I'm willing to give her a chance. You're letting your personal beliefs about something that honesty is none of any of your business cloud your judgment. Yes we've made mistakes and yes our choices have been questionable and we aren't the best examples of leaders right now but none of us would ever put our wants before yours or hurt any of you intentionally. Red Dawn is always our number one priority.
Don't let this destroy us and leave us defenseless to the real threat. This is probably exactly what the white wolf wants, us arguing with each other over nothing and no unity to speak of. For one second forget what she did, or he did, or I did and just trust us. We will get through this we will get our women back, and we will find a way to get pass this. I know we will it's fact. Heck it's why I love you guys its why I love this pack and contrary to what Bryce may have you think we have everything under control."
James walks over to the edge of the stage and scowls in Bryce's direction.
"As for you, pointing fingers with no real solutions doesn't help anyone. You're just a bitter male who realized there's nothing else going on for him. No one needs you and no one wants your misguided help. The only way to obtain a position you don't deserve is by spewing lies and using deceit. You had your chance to have a higher position but you failed to advance pass the first round in the tournament. Your display was so pathetic your opponent asked for the match to end because you were a whimpering mess. A leader must be able to defend Red Dawn not just run his mouth and cower behind others. Let it go Bryce."
"How dare you. A filthy ex-rogue who couldn't satisfy his mate isn't going to-"
Before I could blink James leaps from the stage and stalks over to where Bryce stands and gazes over his neighbors heads to look him directly in the eye.
"You can say what you wish about me I've heard worse. All I care about is putting things back right. I care about the men we have in deep comas because when they're awake the waves of emotional pain and physical pain are so constant, so excruciating, there's no reprieve and it's enough to kill them. Do you know what that means? It means the women, our pack mates, those men very reason for living, are being constantly raped again and again and again. They've been beaten and degraded for hours and are, as we speak, probably holding out hope for us to save them. Now will the next words out of your mouth be about getting our females back?"
James waits his head tilted slightly. A moment goes by then another but Bryce remains quiet his skin tinted a sickly green and a look horror on his sweaty face.
"No, I didn't think so because all you care about is yourself. Now sit down and shut the hell up" James growls. The look he gives Bryce leaves no room for negotiations and Bryce clumsily drops into his seat avoiding James scrutiny by looking down at the ground. I can smell his fear from all the over here.
During the entire altercation James's expression remained blank. Only a slight narrowing of his eyes displayed his true fury.
"Good. Now I would like to get back on track unless there are any objections?" He now confronts the stunned crowd. Hell even I'm shocked at his actions and if I'm honest with myself fairly aroused. This 'Take Charge' James is a very sexy look. I remember it well. Once it's obvious no one will oppose he starts speaking again.
"Here's where we are with the rogues. We found their scent a few miles down from the border of Red Dawn along Reapers River. It was faint but it was enough to track from the river about 5 miles until we got to an interstate. Unfortunately that's as far as we got. They must have loaded up into a car or something because we lost their scents from their."
A sense of hopeless blankets the room accompanied by disparaging expressions and a few whispers of doom scattered about.
"Hold on that's not the end. Jared made the observation that this particular interstate was a toll road with no way to avoid the booths from each direction. We have a decent timeline to work with and know that they had to be driving a large vehicle to transport all the women and the rogues.
According to pack records we have a couple of members that work at the nearest city's D.O.T. We're going to talk with them ask if they'll be able to pull the footage from the booths and providing that the rouges went in the direction of the city we can get even more information from there.
It's not much but it's something and it won't be long before we get the right lead. We will checking surrounding woodlands and around every establish. We'll stake them out if we have to. We'll even question the people in town someone must have noticed something out of the norm.
They either live in town or around it I just know they do. I can feel it. Predators like them like to stay close and monitor their prey."
He pauses suddenly and looks reluctant to say his next words but they spill from his lips anyway.
"We also have to entertain the possibility of...a traitor."
As he must have expected cries of disbelief are bellowed.
A traitor? This is news to me but now that he's mentioned it it does make me wonder, never once had I considered one of our own betraying us but why not? There's so much animosity here it wouldn't be that far fetched.
"Yeah I know it's hard to believe but this enemy knows too much about us it's a very real possibility. I'm not accusing anyone specifically and I have no suspects. I just want you all to keep a look out for anyone acting strange or maybe unaccounted for for long periods of time. It doesn't necessary have to be a glaring change it can be something subtle like a shift in personality or they become hostile and insistent upon diversion in a conversation concerning their daily activities."
I gasp softly his warning words jarring me and immediately brings to mind my conversation with Christy that day in the rose garden and the weird bruising on her arms. She seem so different that day so withdrawn. No! I mentally force those thoughts away. It's ridiculous Christy wouldn't betray us. I focus back on James.
"Now I don't want you to start a witch-hunt, use your gut and your instincts. Just because someone is having a bad day and is cranky doesn't mean they're an informant for the rogues. You will recognize deception when its presented." He gives them a minute to let his words sink in.
"Now that we've given you an update does anyone have any questions?"
It takes a moment but eventually a hand goes up in the back.
"Yes Rosa what's your question?" James encourages her with a reassuring smile. The slight willowy woman shyly gets to her feet.
"I was very close to one of the woman that's missing and I tried to contact her earlier through the pack connection to see what she was up to. I didn't know until now that she was taken by rogues but when I tried I couldn't feel her anymore, like at all, and now that I try with the others it's the same thing there's nothing just silence. Why is that?"
"They're drugged" I blurt out a little too enthusiastically happy that I can finally contribute to the meeting. I receive confused looks from both of my partners. I get a hold of myself and finish my statement more calmly.
"It's the most logically answer. The women wouldn't have willing broke the connection and their captors wouldn't have bothered trying to get them to because they wouldn't have been able to confirm that the women actually broke it."
"There's a drug like that out there?" Rosa asks horrified.
"Unfortunately yes. Its call S-1 it was developed by scientist in the werewolf community. I asked Doc Gage the same question you did and he said it's the only thing out there that's capable of disrupting our connection to the women. We even have some here in the clinic. Its really no more than a strong tranquilizer used on us during major surgery. Human sedatives aren't potent enough to put our wolves to sleep which is crucial. If they aren't put to sleep they might, misinterpret the doctor's ministrations as a threat and transform on the table and attack them.
This drug is powerful and instantaneous and in concentrated doses or used excessively the drug puts the wolf in a deep sleep, so deep it can disrupt any connections even there human side can't reach them until it wears off. They must have gotten their hands on the drugs some how and are keeping the women heavily sedated while they abuse them."
"Are there anymore question?" James ask quietly. He suddenly appears somber and to be contemplating something.
Everyone remains completely still no one makes a sound. I know they have more questions I see it in their eyes but maybe they're afraid to know the answers. I learned a long time ago from my father that its more easy for people to live life in the dark about certain things. The truth has the power to change a person, make them sad, afraid, and distrustful.
"Make no mistake we will find them and soon. I want you guys to believe that" I assure them giving them my most earnest face.
"That's right" Dallas step forward with renewed self-assurance "And if any of you have any more questions or concerns or just want someone to grieve with come to us" He waves his hand between him and I then points to Jared as well who had moved defensively midway down the aisle when things got heated, then finally and begrudgingly he points to James. I roll my eyes and step further in front of him.
"For now let's digress. I know you all need to digest everything that's was said tonight. When you go home to your families and friends I just want you all to stay strong and send out prayers to our missing members. If there's no more to address at this time this meeting is adjourned."
It's as if everyone in attendance dispel a collective sigh of exhaustion. I can feel that they're still wary of current leadership but more importantly I can also feel that their optimistic and that's all that really matters. We all just need time to fully come to terms with everything and come up with a amicable way we can work together for Red Dawn.
The pack slowly begin to empty their seats and file out of the auditorium. Out of the corner of my eye I see James turn to leave as well and call out to him.
"James wait a minute" I walk over to him and stare up into his tired face.
"Thank you James" I say my eyes surely reflecting the strong sincerity in those three little words.
"There's no need to thank me Amber. I have no doubt you could have handled them easily. If you'd have used your Alpha Tone they would have submitted but I know you didn't want to force their obedience right now, you would much rather earn it. Besides I didn't want to have you stressed because of..." He casually waves at my belly.
"Right of course" We both know he's lying but he's to modest and kind to say so. Truth is I didn't want to use my Alpha Tone because I was afraid it wouldn't work and that would have effectively confirmed my lack of standing amongst the pack.
"I should have listened to you about what Renee said. You were right if I'd listen to you this may not have happened. I'm sorry." My eyes begin to water and I look away.
"Don't be" he replies instantly. He tenderly grabs my chin and brings my face back to his. The usual euphoric tingling sensation from his touch races through my body. I close my eyes and bask in the feeling wishing that it will last forever but unfortunately he doesn't feel the same way. He quickly releases me and clears his throat uncomfortably taking a huge step back.
"What's done is done. I'm sure you're still beating yourself up about it. I'm not going to mention it again after this or berate you like the others, but you have to let it go. You know that right? If not it will just hinder your further decisions and you will second guess everything."
I nod solemnly. I do know this but I also know it's going to be a long time before I can truly forgive myself.
"Anyway speaking of Renee I should go check up on her"
"Yeah go. We'll make plans about our next move in the morning. We're all pretty drained right now. Just make sure to be in my office at 9am I'll let the others know too."
"Alright I'll be there." he hesitates looking as if he want to say something else but shakes his head and finally adds "Good Night Amber."
"Good Night James" I smile but it collapses into a frown as I watch him turn and saunter off. He hops down from the stage and walks over to Renee.
**********
James P.OV.
THAT WAS BRUTAL. I wouldn't say we managed to completely absolve them of their fear but at least the atmosphere isn't so choking as the members begin to empty out.
As they have all night my eyes once again drift to Renee. I expect to meet her gaze but instead something else has stolen it. My head swings to the left to see what it is.
Dallas?
A tinge of jealousy passes through me not nearly as strong as it should be more like a small irritation. That's something to think about later.
The two stare at each other completely entranced until Amber walks over to him and places a hand tenderly on Dallas's shoulder breaking their spell. He completely dismisses Renee with a frown and turns to Amber looking like a lovesick puppy.
I see her face crumble her lips part in despair. She wraps her arms around her waist retreating within once again.
It's then that it hits me. I'm such a idiot. It would appear that we are more alike than I previously thought. How could I miss that Dallas is her mate. It all makes sense now. The way see tenses every time we come across Amber and Dallas together. On a couple of instances I could have sworn I heard her heart beat change from a neutral rhythm to a fast pounding. I even heard small growls escape her lips but I always brushed it off, after all her and Amber don't have the best track record. Not once did it occur to me that envy or possessiveness were driving her actions.
Then there's the way her eyes always follow him when he enters a room, her gaze even staying locked on his shadow when he leaves until he's completely gone from sight.
Dallas is a extremely good looking male. Even I can't deny that so I just figured she had a little eye crush. Most of the women do even the mated ones occasionally gawk when he walks in covered in sweat from training, his clothes sticking to his firm body, but unlike them she watches every single time he enters sweaty or not.
A lot of her actions towards him can be explained away but I can't explain away the look of deep incomparable yearning I saw before Dallas broke their gaze. I know it all to well and if the want I saw flashed in Dallas's eyes was any indication it's not completely one sided either.
I stand frozen. What should I do with this information? It's not fair that Renee never really had a chance to be with Dallas. Renee is an amazing woman I don't regret my affections for her or treating her like a queen but she isn't my queen. I'm just a conciliation prize. I know she feels something for me and I know I can make her happy but I can't make her soar like Dallas could, like Amber does for me.
I should speak with Amber about this. We need to mend bridges maybe try to work out things with our True Mates. Even with the baby we can make things right as long as we're all willing.
A favorite quote suddenly comes to mind one I would always repeat when contemplating running away from my old pack. A life isn't worth living if it's filled with regrets and lost chances, you have to seize what you want to be truly fufilled. Today I don't have fear holding me back. My foolish hopeless heart beats faster at that thought.
I turn back to the couple on stage they appear to be engrossed in a serious conversation. Curious I adjust my hearing and focus on for a quick listen not wanting to go over and intrude on something private.
"I just want to move pass all the problems between the two of us Dallas. No more fighting please for him." Amber places one hand atop her abdomen.
"I know, you're right. We can make this work." Dallas places a hand next to hers on their child. His eyes brighten instantly and Amber giggles and moves her hand over his.
"You know he always kicks when you're around. I never get tired of that feeling. I can't wait to meet our little guy."Dallas chuckles in response then suddenly looks up from her belly and into her eyes.
"You know I will always love you right" he speaks with unwavering conviction yet there's a sad note to his words. He runs a hand through her loose hair tenderly and reverently as a lover would. Amber nods at him and glides a hand up his arm to his chest.
"Me too Dallas" They smile lovingly at each other and embrace.
My heart sinks to my toes. The hope that had begun to bloom at the possibility of reconciliation with Amber dies a slow painful death.
No I will keep my mouth shut. They're happy together I won't ruin their family. If Dallas truly wanted to be with Renee he would have come forward to claim her but he treats her no more than he does the paint on the walls when everyone else is around. Renee deserves more than that. What Dallas has with Amber must be strong to deny the mating pull.
I can't keep living in a dream world where Amber and I are happily together and she doesn't love another man. I'm content with Renee she makes me happy, she makes me laugh, she makes me want to be better, and most importantly she has me willing to fall in love again, which after feeliby the soul searing pain of true heartache I thought would be an impossible feat. In return I vow to cherish her and give her everything her heart desires. I'll make her forget Dallas one way or another.
I turn around with finality feeling worthless and rejected no doubt how Renee feels right now as well. I can almost smell the despair coming from her then again maybe it's my own. I put on a smile and make my way over to her. I'm sure my fake cheerful demeanor wouldn't fool her if she was looking but instead she's trapped in her own private turmoil with pains I'm not entirely sure I can mend but you best believe I'm going to damn well try to.
*°~*°~ *°~ *°~ *°~ *°~ *°~*
VOTE-COMMENT-VOTE-COMMENT-VOTE !!!!! ^_^
AN: In the next chapter the angst and drama picks up again when Christy confront Hunter. Also I'm kinda stumped on where to go next with the story so if anyone has any suggestions I am open to them.