Harry
I follow Niall out of the club, leaving Bresi lying in a heap on the floor. Niall is fast in travelling out the entrance doors, stumbling across the pathway. I catch up with him quickly though, pulling at his arm so that he spins round to face me. He grunts as our chests bumps together and he looks up at me, his breath staggering.
"Niall..." I trail off, gently caressing his flushed cheek. He gulps nervously before his face turns a slight shade of green and he strolls over to the nearest dumpster to vomit. Sighing, I walk over to him and gently rub my hand on his lower back to sooth him. "Just let it out." I mumble as he continues to vomit. Once Niall is done, he rests himself against the dumpster and stares at me. That's when Liam and Bresi appear from the club, both of them panting slightly. I glare at Bresi and Niall turns round to face us.
"Get away from him." I demand, walking toward to Bresi, who takes a few steps back when he sees my hand clench into a fist. Liam is quick to step between us though, facing me with his hands on my arms to steady me. I look over Liam's shoulder to see that Bresi is wiping the blood off his nose, the damage that I had caused.
"I'm the reason he's here, not Niall." Liam starts, shaking his head. I frown at him.
"What?"
"I set you both up." He sighs and I can feel my muscles relaxing a little.
"How do you mean?" I ask.
"Niall spoke to me, said he was lonely so I took him out to meet Bresi. I knew that'd make you jealous so I called you to tell you what happened." Liam explains shamefully and I press my lips into a hard line. Liam takes a few steps back and stands next to Bresi.
"Look, you can hate me all you want but you're wasting your time. It's Niall you need to talk too." He says, nodding toward the figure behind me. I turn around and see that Niall is walking away from us, down the alley way while he sniffles to himself quietly. I leave Bresi and Liam standing there and follow after Niall, quickly catching up with him.
"Hey." I say softly, blocking his path. He sniffs and looks up it me, his eyes watering.
"Go away." He mumbles, gently trying to push me aside but not having much luck.
"Why didn't you tell me how you felt?" I question, gazing down at him. He shies away from me but I don't budge.
"Because I didn't want to sound like a selfish dick, which I know I am." He admits weakly as he starts to shiver lightly. I take off my leather jacket and drape it around he shoulders and he smiles up at me.
I call Taylor and he takes me home. The ride home is quiet, Niall and I barely utter a word to each other. Taylor is giving us suspicious looks from his front mirror but he doesn't question us and when I glance at Niall, it looks as if he's about to puke any second.
When we arrive home at Niall's flat, Niall saunters ahead into his bedroom while I take Cara out of my mum's arms.
"Has she been okay?" I ask softly, as she whimpers against my hold.
"She just woke up there, probably realised you were gone." Mum smiles, gazing at us both.
"Thanks, for taking her." I say politely but my mum waves her hand dismissively.
"Not a problem. Just name a time and place, I'll be there for you both." She assures me and I nod. "Did you sort things out with your other half?" She adds, nodding toward Niall's bedroom and I look longingly at his door.
"Um..." I say hesitatingly and she smiles sympathetically at me. "Do you mind taking Cara this weekend? Just so I can patch things up with Niall..." I suggest warily and she nods.
"Yeah, of course. I love spending time with my granddaughter, you know that." She replies and I sigh with relief.
At the weekend, I take Niall out on a date to a small Bella Italia restaurant next to Leicester Square in London. We walk hand-in-hand up to the entrance and we order our meal and drinks inside.
"Niall," I start and he looks up at me from his pizza, "I want to talk to you about last night," I begin and he starts.
"Look, forget about what happened. I was being an idiot, okay? I just needed some attention -"
"No, I was being an idiot, Niall. I'm sorry for making you feel lonely. I mean, I cheated on you for crying out loud, I should be making it up to you -"
"No, Harry, listen to me. This isn't your fault, okay? With Cara without a mum, you obviously have to be with Cara. Just...ignore me, yeah? I was being an idiot." Niall shakes his head, waving his dismissively. I stare at him intensively, giving him a long look as I think hard.
"I have a proposal to make." I demand, leaning forward on my chair and clasping my hands over my half-eaten meal. Niall looks up again.
"Go on." He encourages.
"I can vary my time with you and Cara. Y'know, if you're lonely and all – perhaps I can spend one week with Cara, then send her off to her grandparents and then -"
"You can't split your time with your family just to make me happy. That'd make me look like a horrible, selfish person. I don't want that. Life doesn't work like that anyway. Imagine messing Cara's life up like that, how confused she'll be." Niall sighs. I run a hand through my hair, feeling completely helpless. I can't just let this side. After everything I've done to Niall, I can't just leave him feeling lonely and vulnerable all the time. Especially with Cassandra still in the picture.
"This was lovely, by the way. Thank you." Niall says politely, beaming.
"My treat." I insist, as I begin to pay the bill.
- - -
On the Sunday after noon, I head back to Cheshire to pick up Cara as I had left her with my mother and Gemma. I'm not going to lie. I was scared that Niall and I didn't have any future left. I felt as if my entire life should be focused on Cara right now. She means the world to me and I know Niall understands that. But I love Niall. So much.
"Hello, Harry. Did you sort things out, then?" Mum asks hopefully, handing a tired Cara into my arms and I begin to cradle her. She sees my disappointed face and gives me a questionable look. I lay a now sleeping Cara into her pram as my mother makes us tea and hands me a mug.
"What's the matter?" She asks curiously.
"I've been thinking whether...my relationship with Niall...is worth it," I begin and she frowns. "I've been thinking about this for a while, actually. Ever since Nadine died -" I stop dead, realising it's the first time I've used her name since she left me. Since using her name then, I've realised how much of a mess my life actually is. "Ever since Cara lost her mother." I finish off, squeezing my eyes shut. I can feel my mum's hand wrap around my own in encouragement so I continue.
"Ever since she left, it's like she was the only one holding Niall and I together, y'know? Like, she was the reason for our relationship. Now...now it all just seems pointless because I keep hurting Niall and I'm only gonna hurt him more. I'm not trying to be the victim in any of this but Niall has done so much for me since we first met and I've all done is treated him like shit." I ramble on, my fingernails digging into my mug of tea, my fingers turning white.
"Harry." Mum voices and I look up.
"You cheated on Niall, right?" she asks and I bow my head shamefully.
"Yeah, with Louis." I mutter. But I'm surprised when she doesn't tell me off, or make any accusations.
"Why did you do that?"
"Because I was afraid, I guess. Niall is the first and only person that I've ever cared about, ever given a damn about since meeting Cassandra and I was scared. I had all my emotions turned off, I couldn't feel anything but pain at the time and I was afraid of falling in love with Niall even though I already was so I thought that...if I cheated on Niall, then maybe that would mean that I'm still the same, that I'm still the person Cassandra made me." I explain, feeling my insides turn in a sickening way at the thought of everything I had done to him. I had used Niall, hurt him, cheated on him, taken advantage of him...everything that the lowest possible human being on Earth could do. And I hated myself for it.
"Niall was only supposed to be part of a plan." I pursue and I can see my mum frowning again, at the corner of my eye. "When Niall got in too deep, Cassandra and I were supposed to keep him at bay from the CIA. He was supposed to know as little as possible but then he kept coming back and I...I fell in love with him." I shrug my shoulders carelessly, feeling a little sheepish but angry at myself the same time.
"So, you're ending what you have with Niall because of some plan with Cassandra that went wrong?" Mum asks, looking at me in disbelief. I sigh heavily.
"No, mum. I'm doing this because I'm trying to protect him. Like I said, all I do is hurt him. When will it be the next time I hurt him? Tomorrow? Next week? A month. I do love him, I just...have a hard way of showing it." I mumble at the end and mum clicks her tongue.
"All I can say is...do whatever you think is best. And whatever happens, you have your family with you." Mum smiles and I smile back gratefully. I glance back at a sleeping Cara, when my phone rings on the kitchen counter and Niall's face appears.
"I better go." I say softly to mum, before kissing her on the cheek and taking Cara with me back to the flat.
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Hey guys. So what do you think? Do you think Niall is being a dick, or he should be allowed to act like that? Do you think Harry should end things with Niall? Let me know, I love to hear your thoughts! Much love :)