Cain remembered rising out of the dark of his mind. There was a break in his memories, snow floating through an open window, Tessa glowing in the dark. Then there was heat, like his chest had been sliced open and a burning coal set inside. But it was just his heart, overwhelming him with its pulse, sending his body into overdrive.
He slept. Like a creature buried deep in the ground. Hibernating to survive the cold. There were dreams, but like they always did, when he woke up he was left with only the vague sensation of loss. Something terrible he couldn’t quite remember.
There was a hard man standing at the foot of his bed. Tall and silver and glinting in the bright light that blasted through the windows. Outside there were birds. Cain wondered if he was really awake.
Then the man bowed, “Your Highness.”
Cain got to his feet. He was wearing different clothes and at first he was appalled and then he remembered that in his childhood when he fell asleep his servants would dress him. It felt like he was looking at everything through warped glass.
The man remained in his bow and Cain realized he expected a response. He nodded stiffly.
“There are matters that need to be discussed. You probably desire an explanation for the time you have lost.” Cain wondered if the man meant the seven years he had been without a heart, or the past few months he couldn’t recall.
“Your Name.”
“Harlow Blind, I lead an army of five hundred men from Terracendia,” The man looked uncomfortable and it dawned on Cain that he had probably expected to rule for his efforts. Cain didn’t want to deal with a rebellion, it was his birthright to rule and he would have what he was born to have.
Cain smiled and clamped a hand on his shoulder.
“It would be my honor to have you on my inner council.”
Harlow Blind looked surprised, and momentarily Cain thought he might decline.
Then, “It would be my honor.”
Cain knew that wasn’t the end of it, but he was suddenly eager to leave this room and see what the world looked like with a heart.
Down the stairs and in the throne room there was a multitude of servants and men and women clad in armor of all kinds. He smiled at the servants who observed him curiously. He was shocked they didn’t display fear at him, surely all the years of torture could not be so easily erased.
“They’ve waited years for you to wake up.” That was a young boy, wearing work clothes and frowning under a head of fair hair. Harlow Blind nodded at the boy, who returned the gesture and Cain became aware that the boy, despite his age, seemed to lead many of the soldiers around them.
They watched him always, shifting weight to unconsciously protect him. Cain thought about commanding that kind of loyalty. The boy was scowling. Cain decided he liked him.
Cain looked around for Tessa, expecting her to come tearing through the crowds and punch him for being so ridiculous. She didn’t emerge.
The boy, who introduced himself as Gray explained that Resa had succeeded in finding a jinx and had returned with an army as well. He inquired as to where she was, but neither man had seen her since the night she had defeated the Queen. The Queen was dead, buried in the crypts beneath the city. While that had been happening, the Queen’s army had fought against the rebel forces. Harlow smirked when he spoke about how they had surrendered when their witch was dragged from the tower.
“There is a girl with fair hair, her name is Tessa. Have you heard about someone like that?” Cain finally inquired, the question had been burning for some time, his eyes flicking ever more impatiently as he searched for her.
The two men exchanged a glance, something unreadable in the boy’s stormy expression. It suddenly struck Cain that she wanted nothing to do with him, that she was purposely avoiding the palace to stay away from him.
“She isn’t here,” the boy finally said. “We should talk in private.”
Cain waved Harlow back when he began to follow them. “You needn’t concern yourself, I’m sure you have much to do.”
Harlow Blind blinked, probably stunned at having been dismissed. Cain knew that was the wrong thing to do, but he didn’t want the hard man to share the knowledge of Tessa’s whereabouts.
The escaped into the next room, Gray strode to a window that looked over the city, hands in pockets.
Cain looked at him, but he was watching his feet and Cain couldn’t tell what he was thinking.
“Tessa?” Cain nudged.
The boy looked at Cain, his jaw twitching slightly. “She stayed with my aunt for a while, joined the rebel cause.”
Cain didn’t want to think about what this boy might feel for her, so he asked where she was now. Gray was looking back at the city now.
“You can see the south wall from here,” he whispered. “Where the witch hung the bodies of the people she killed. She probably stood right here and watched them sway in the wind.” Gray looked back at Cain. “You probably did the same. Can you remember?”
“I remember nothing,” there was a chill in the air now, nothing his new heart could ward off. A flash of steel, cold against his throat. What was he missing?
“It is better that way, I think.”
Cain shook his head. “I intend to learn what has happened in my absence.”
Gray looked very strange then, “What if no one will tell you?”
“They will,” Cain said forcefully and Gray was silent.
“Tessa’s touring the outside villages with her platoon. They’re delivering food.”
Cain stopped. “When will she be back?”
“Never,” Gray sad tiredly, “She is perhaps the bravest person I have ever known, but no one can withstand what she has.”
“She ran away?” Cain couldn’t help the emotion that cracked against his voice.
“She escaped.” Gray’s fists were balled at his sides. “And you love her enough to let her stay away.”
Cain wasn’t sure if that was true. He thought that he was selfish enough to let her go. He thought he would raise a thousand armies to rescue her should she be stolen, he would soar through the clouds to bring her back to life, and he would give up the kingdom to exist with her for eternity. But what if she couldn’t stand to be near him, what if it hurt too much.
“So be it.” That was all he could do, hope that one day she would return to make him whole.
“Do I have permission to speak freely?” The boy asked.
“You do,” Cain was unsure of what to do, so uncomfortable with this formality.
“Harlow Blind has very loyal supporters, he’s powerful because he expects power.” Cain knew this. “Keep him close and control the power he has and he will serve you well. If not.” Gray spread his fingers. “You’ll lose your freedom again.”
“And you?” Cain asked. Gray shook his head.
“I’m no leader. I want this all to be over so I can be what I’m supposed to be.”
“What is that?”
“I don’t know anymore, but I want to find out.”
Cain thought that he would do anything to have that freedom.
Resa watched soft, orange light paint the city as the sun set. Nestled between her shoulder blades were Bera’s wings, new fabric strung between them for his angel to fly. The city was falling asleep before her, lights going out as fires died and candles were extinguished. Soon the only light came from the stars that glittered and spun around her, so close she swore she could reach up and collect them in her palms.
When she closed her eyes she saw Matthew’s hair shining like a gold coin as he fell. When she breathed she tasted his tears on her tongue. He was gone, but he surrounded her, dripping from the air like dew drops.
She didn’t think she would ever come back to the city. Maybe she would go to the mountains, or past them to the desert. Somewhere in the back of her mind she contemplated travelling farther, beyond the uncharted lands to the endless waters that tore against the earth endlessly. She had an eternity to watch them battle.
When Matthew had fallen from the window, she had wanted to hold his hand and fall with him. But he had whispered in her ear. The truth. You can live. So she had let go.
Resa could live a thousand lifetimes for Matthew. So that when she finally joined him, and all the others she had loved, she could give them something, a piece of themselves her heart had stolen.
The edge of the world was beginning to lighten, the stars blinking into nothing around her shoulders. Resa stood, utterly unafraid.
She raised her arms to her sides, the fabric fluttering in the breeze, the frame bolted to every joint. There was a whole world out there to see. She didn’t take a breath as she leaped from the tower, it would have been stolen by the winds that carried her up.
Into the sky.