Bury Me in Black (4)
The thought never left my mind; it was always deep in my mind no matter how hard I tried to ignore it. I didn't want to think about it but it was something to big ignore. I lay in my bed, staring up at the ceiling. Everything was quiet, nobody was around; just me and my thoughts. I heard a light knock on the door, I turn my head.
"Come in,"
The door pushed open, there stood Mikey. He was in his PJ's, he looked sad. He walked over to me and sat down.
He sighed, looking down. "Gerard?"
"Yeah Mikes'?" I replied.
I sat up, crossing my legs and put my hands in my lap. He didn't look up as I did; he just sat there very still. He looked pale, like he'd seen a ghost. That scared me, I wondered what was wrong.
"Mom and Dad, they were talking and they said you had Cancer. Is that true?" He asked.
Nobody had told him, we didn't want too in case it hurt him too much. I felt my heart being ripped, I took in deep breath; I knew I had to tell him. He looked up, his eyes were blood shot. They looked like the time when I woke up in hospital.
I took in a deep breath, "Yes."
I heard him gasp, his eyes started welling up. I was a horrible brother, I did this to him. He started shaking violently, his eyes streaming with tears and he screamed throwing his arms around me. I wrapped my arms around him, I felt like the worse person in the world right now.
"I'm so sorry," I whispered.
He ignored me, continuing to cry loudly. I didn't know what to do; I just sat there hugging him. He soon stopped shaking, he went silent. I quickly let go of the hug and looked at him, he was fine. He sniffed
I stared down at my drawing, it was of her. Lyn-z. It wasn't prefect, but it was something that reminded me of her. I smiled at the thought, she was prefect and when she kissed me I couldn't stop smiling. She was one of the best things that happen to me, I hadn't talked to her since but it only been a day so I didn't mind-
"Gerard?" I heard my mum call.
I heard her footsteps come down the stairs. I turn my head, seeing my mom standing at the door. Her arms were folded, she looked sad in a way.
"Yeah?" I answered standing up from my chair.
"You ready to go to the hospital?" She asked.
Oh, yeah. That. I sighed and nodded, walking passed her and upstairs to the door way. Since my last hospital visit, I'd been throwing up twice as much and hardly eaten at all. My Mom only seemed to get more and more worried, I wasn't that scared anymore; I knew I was going to die.
I grabbed my coat, putting on my shoes and left the house. I waited by the car door, my mom was always I slow person to leave the house. I glanced up at the sky, another rainy day. My mom eventually walked out the door, with her hand-bag and various other things. She shut the door rushing over to the car. We both got in, shutting the door. I heard my mom sigh deeply, I turn to look at her.
She dropped both her arms and placed them on her knees and open her mouth, "Gee?"
I nodded, my stomach almost twisted at hearing her voice. It sounded sad and hurt, I hated this; I knew I was the reason. Her eyes were full of woe, I twisted my hands together.
"It's just, you mean so much to me, you and your brother." She admitted, looking down. "I'd hate for anything to happen to you,"
I didn't see were she was going with this but I sat in silence looking at her. I noticed her eyes welling up with tears. I moved towards her, hugging her tightly. She sobbed on my shoulder; I patted her on the back. I wasn't sure what to say.
Her body shook, "Gerard. No matter what the doctor says, we'll make it though."
I felt my heart crumble into tiny pieces. She and I, both knew I wasn't going to make it. I just nodded though, not wanting to hurt her. She pulled herself away; wiping away her tears grabbed the keys off her knees.
"We better go,"
And with that, she started the car; leaving our drive way.
We waited at the traffic light; I stared at the people around us. The hospital was quiet far from were we lived, we'd been driving for about 10 minutes now. There was a strong part of me that panicked; I was going to see the doctor about my cancer. It wasn't the greatest thing in the world, it was actually horrible. I rested my head back on the chair, waiting for the traffic light to turn green. Me and my mom hadn't spoken since we drove off, it was just silence. I played with my seat belt, pulling it back and forth then I heard a loud screech that hurt my ears, I turn my head around to where to noise came from. I saw a car speeding towards us, my heart raced. It only seemed to go faster and faster, I turn to my mom.
"Mom!" I screamed.
She looked at me, her eyes wide. It felt like the whole thing was in slow motion, I heard the engine of the car roar as it speeded towards us. My body froze, I wanted to run out of the car but I couldn't my body refused to move. I didn't know what to do. Then it happen, it hit us so fast we both went flying forward, as did the car. We It was horrible and painful at the same time, I saw my mom put her hand in front of me trying to stop me from hitting myself but it was too late. I felt pain everywhere in my body, it hurt like hell. The car still went forward, until it smashed into another car. Everything was blurry. I screamed, as did my mom, then I blacked out.
It wasn't long since I'd visited this place, except this time I had doctors surrounding me. The all stared at me in shock, their eyes all wide. They all had masks on and knifes, I couldn't feel anything though. Everything felt like a blur, I heard noises, loud noises. People all rushing back and forth, all talking to each other.
I turn my head, seeing my mom. She was covered in blood, everywhere. She was covered in cuts and glass along with doctors and nurses surrounding her. Her eyes were tightly shut, my heart sank a little. Is she alive? I asked myself, I turn back to the doctors. The all continued doing there job, I wasn't quiet sure what they were doing to me; I didn't even remember why I was here.
What I did know was I wanted to leave. I didn't want to be here, I didn't want to be in hospital- I felt a strong pain in my right rib. It was painful, very painful. I wanted to scream but when I did try nothing came out. I felt dizziness come over me, making me shut my eyes and it all black out again.
Something hit me like a pile of bricks. It wasn't anything good, my head hurt like hell and I didn't know where I was, at all. I was in a dark room, I heard a beeping noise. I looked around be hide me, seeing a heart monitor. A little green line would go up and down every few seconds; I was in hospital, again. I sighed, letting my head drop on the pillow.
I managed to push myself up again, attempting to get out of bed. I put of foot on the floor, and then the other standing up and course I fell screaming in agony. I screamed loudly, feeling the pain in both my legs. I looked up at them, seeing my left leg in a cast and my right covered in bruise and cuts. Great. I felt a pain in my head, it felt as if it had its own heart beat.
"Mr. Way!" I heard someone yell.
I turned to move my body but I was in too much pain, then I saw a young nurse beside me. She had long black hair, tanned skin and chocolate brown eyes.
"What did you do?" She asked, shaking her head.
She put both her hands under my back, helping me up off the floor. I quickly held on to the bed in pain.
"I need to leave, now." I demanded.
I held onto a long sliver pole and had some needle attracted to my arm, the nurse shook her head laughing a little.
"You can't leave!" She laughed, "You've just been in a car crash, what makes you think I'll let you leave?"
Car crash. That was it! That was the reason why I was in hospital. Wait, then where mom? Is she okay? Where is she? I asked myself all these questions, even though I couldn't answer them.
I looked at her, as she helped me up on the bed. I held on her arm tightly as she placed me on the bed, I laid down resting my head on the pillow. I let my head sink into it, so if felt comfortable. The pain in my head stopped, slowly.
I went straight to what I wanted to know, "Where's my Mom?"
She looked down at her feet for the longest time possible, I felt my stomach twist. I'd noticed whenever doctors or nurses had bad news they went quiet, she looked back up.
She cleared her throat, "I'll be back just now."
She walked off into the darkness; I felt a lump form in my throat. Whenever that happen I felt I was going to cry, but I didn't know why. I wasn't upset; well I was worried more than anything else. I looked down my body, I was injured. Badly. I heard footsteps come; I looked back to the darkness and saw the nurse come back with a small clipboard in her hand.
"Well, what's wrong?" I asked.
I felt my stomach twist, I wasn't sure I wanted to know. I knew it was bad, but how bad?
She took a deep breath, "She's died."