A week.
A week without Mathilda.
A week with only sadness.
A week of pure regret and guilt.
Mathilda moved out of Luke's house a few days ago.
Sebastian still lives there but is out often and comes home late and with alcohol on his breath.
That's at least what Luke said.
I talk to him sometimes.
Only over the phone.
I miss his face. I miss his beautiful electrifying eyes that I can get lost in every second of everyday. I miss his soft lips pressed against mine. I miss his laughter that can lighten anyone's day. I miss everything about him.
I've tried to move on.
I really have.
I try every day.
But my thoughts always wonder back to him.
I can't get over him. He has some kind of control over me without me knowing. I hate it, but I somehow love it.
Everything I do is for him. But of course my drunken mind had to ruin his life.
He says that it's okay but I can hear that he isn't okay. I mean his freaking daughter left him to live with someone she hates. To know that someone would rather live with a person they despise than with you is hard.
A few months ago I had my whole future planned out. A future with him. A future with Mathilda too.
But I've ruined that for myself.
"Milla are you listening to me?" My friend Kira said, pulling me out of my thoughts.
"Oh yeah, sorry, what were you saying?" I said.
She sighed.
I've only really been hanging out with her because she insisted that we should spend more time together and now that I can't be with Mathilda I don't want to be some loner walking around in the halls looking like someone who hasn't slept in days.
Even though it's true, I don't want people to know that.
"You have been like this the whole week" she shook her head.
"I'm sorry, I'm just a bit distracted" I replied.
"Mathilda? What happened with you two anyways? Last week you guys were inseparable and now you can't even look at each other" she asked.
"I don't want to talk about it"
"Of course you don't. I'm just trying to help Milla and you won't let me. Stop trying to push everybody away. The only thing we want to do is help you" she raised her voice.
She was right.
"It's hard" I said, dully.
"Milla stop always taking the easy way out. People are just trying to help you" she said, picking up her bag and leaving the lunch table we were sat at.
I was left alone once again.
It was my own fault.
I keep pushing people away that want to help me so there is no one left.
I want them all back. I want them all back into my life. But how can I when the only thing I've done is pushing them away.
I stood up from the lunch table and grabbed my things before quickly rushing over to my locker and grabbing my things for the next lesson.
I tried to concentrate, I really did. But my head was spinning, and my mind just couldn't focus on school when I'm a giant mess.
I left math class, the last class of the day, and went home.
I decided to walk, half an hour walking will be good for me anyways, to clear my head.
I was strolling down town when I saw a oh too familiar face.
"Luke?" I yelled
"Milla...hey" he awkwardly said, scratching the back of his neck.
What is up with him?
"Haven't seen you in a while" I nervously laughed.
"yeah I have been...uhm... busy" he answered.
"Its been a while since we talked on the phone too" I said, trying to keep the small talk going.
"Yeah" he just said.
"have you talked to Tilda ever since she moved?" he cringed at the mention of her name.
"no" he sulked.
"she refuses to talk to me" he adds.
"Luke I'm so so sor-" my sentence was cut short by a voice that was coming from inside the shop we were standing outside of.
"babe? Luke who are you talking to?" A black haired girl stuck her head out from the shop, staring me up and down and scowling slightly at my appearance.
I suddenly felt sick to the stomach.
How can he just move on like that? How can he just forget about us and find another girl? I thought he loved me. Love doesn't fade away that fast.
Suddenly a million questions were flying around my head.
Did he ever love me?
Was he just using me?
Was I that easy to get over?
Luke stood with a blank look on his face. He was avoiding my eyes and staring straight down at his feet.
"Are you going to introduce me Lukey?" the girl asked in the most annoying squeak that just made me want to punch her in the nose.
"Uhm yeah sure uh... Stephanie this is Milla, Milla this is Stephanie" he said awkwardly, scratching the back of his head.
"His girlfriend" she added, with a bitter laugh following soon after.
My eyes shot up from where I was looking and searched for Luke's eyes.
He raised his head and our eyes finally made contact.
I gave him a sad look and he returned it.
I shook my head and took a deep breath before speaking, "Well-uhm I better go I have some things to do"
"Bye" Stephanie squeaked and then dragged Luke into the shop.
I swear I could rip her head off right then and there.
When they had fully disappeared into the shop I angrily stomped away.
I was furious, how could he do that to me?
If you love someone you don't just get over them like that.
And honestly he didn't even seem very comfortable around her.
I hate her.
I hate him.
How could he do this to me?
______________________________
Wow compared to how bad I was at updating before, I'm on a roll
Hope you guys liked this update.
please vote and comment if you liked it
Love you guys
-Fie :3