A shinobi must never show tears
A shinobi must suppress all emotions
- Rule 25 of the shinobi conduct
With deep love comes deep hate
And nothing good ever comes from hate.
She heard them approach long before they came within view, but she didn’t look up. She didn’t want them here. She wanted to be left alone, but she knew it was useless. No way they would be leaving now.
“There are people there!” Naruto pointed. He increased his speed and hurried over.
“Naruto wait!” Kakashi called. He sighed. He recognized the people Naruto was referring to.
Pakkun had noticed too and glanced at Kakashi concerned. “Do you think it was Sasuke?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” Kakashi answered, “can you catch his scent?”
Pakkun shook his head. “No. The rain washed it all away.”
Kakashi nodded. “Well, there’s only one way to find out then.”
“You think she’ll tell you?”
“I don’t know.”
“That’s Taryn,” Sakura gasped.
Kakashi nodded. “Yes.”
“Is that… Uchiha Itachi? Is he…?” They had arrived at the ruins. All of them stopped some distance away from Taryn and Itachi. Kakashi asked himself concerned how long she had been sitting there like that. It must have been a while. There were traces of a huge fight, but Taryn and Itachi were the only two people here. And Itachi was dead. Taryn might as well be too. Her eyes were lifeless and she didn’t move. It seemed as if she had been crying, but now she was staring ahead, her hand clutching Itachi’s.
Naruto took a step towards her. Probably to ask about Sasuke, but Kakashi grabbed his collar and held him back. “Let go!” the boy snapped, “I wanna know what happened! Was Sasuke here?! Where did he go?!”
“Calm down Naruto,” Kakashi said calmly.
“How can I calm down? If Sasuke was here, we have to go after him!”
“There’s no way we can trace him now,” Kakashi said, “if he was here, he’s long one. We’re not going to find him like this. He could be anywhere.”
“She can tell us where he went. Why would she care about that bastard anyway? He made Sasuke’s life hell. He even killed her brother!”
Kakashi pushed him against a tree and grabbed his collar again. “You listen to me,” he said, “I don’t care how you feel about Itachi, but the least you could do is show some respect. At least for Taryn!” Naruto was about to protest, but Kakashi cut him off. “What if it was Sasuke lying there? How would you feel when someone was screaming at you while you’re grieving? Now be quiet. Sit down and wait. No better, make yourself useful.” He pushed a blanket in Naruto’s arms. “Take this to Taryn.”
Naruto glared at him angry, but didn’t move.
“I’ll take it,” Sai said. He had been watching Taryn closely and was confused by her behaviour. From what he had read, girls were very emotional. Shouldn’t she be crying? Instead it seemed more as if she had no emotion at all.
Curiously he walked over. After a slight hesitation he placed the blanket over her shoulders. She didn’t react and remained motionless. Sai moved to Itachi’s other side and kneeled down. He stared at Itachi for a long time. “Strange idea that he is dead,” he said, “I’ve heard a lot about hm. I didn’t think he would be taken down so easily.”
Taryn’s head went up and she glared at him. She was about to snarl at him that if Itachi hadn’t chosen death himself, there was no way Sasuke would have beaten him. But she couldn’t say that. Sai reported to Danzou. So she kept quiet.
She looked at Itachi again. She didn’t like it that they were here. But it gave her a chance to focus again. She couldn’t stay here forever.
She sighed and was surprised how stable her voice was. She didn’t look at Sai. “Could you… close his eyes for me?”
Sai eyed her curiously for a moment, but leaned over and closed Itachi’s eyes.
Taryn nodded. “Thank you.”
***
Some distance away Kakashi was softly talking with Naruto and Sakura. Naruto had somewhat calmed down but was still restless. He wanted to know about Sasuke, but Kakashi knew that with Taryn’s current state they weren’t going to get any information from her. They would have to be patient.
He had started a fire, since it was a little cold, and it was getting dark. He was worried about Taryn, but left her alone. She wouldn’t want him near her now anyway.
He wondered if she had been here when Itachi died. Had she seen the fight? Had she participated? She didn’t seem injured except for the gash on her leg. It wasn’t deep though.
“So how much longer are we going to sit here?” Naruto asked. He had a frustrated expression. He wanted to find Sasuke, but even he knew he had to wait for Taryn’s explanation.
“As long as we have to,” Kakashi said.
Naruto sighed and glanced at Taryn. He had gotten to know her and he respected her. But he didn’t understand her. Itachi had killed Gaara. He knew she loved Itachi, but he just didn’t get it. She had saved Sasuke’s life over and over, but she must have known he wanted to kill Itachi. So why? The more he thought about it, the more it confused him.
He jumped when he suddenly heard Taryn’s voice.
“I need a cart.”
She was still at Itachi’s side and wasn’t looking in their direction. He noticed Sai had returned to their fire. Naruto looked at his sensei.
Kakashi had turned to Taryn. He didn’t speak, but nodded, even though Taryn wouldn’t be able to see. He turned to Sakura. “There’s a town nearby. Go see if you can find a cart and bring it here. Take Naruto with you.”
Sakura looked at Kakashi uncertain, but stood up. “Come on,” she told Naruto.
Naruto stood up and followed Sakura while casting glances over his shoulder. “We should be looking for Sasuke,” he muttered under is breath, but Sakura still heard. She glanced at him meekly. “We’ll find him,” she said, “as soon as we’re done here we’ll go after him and we’ll find him.”
“As soon as we’re back I’m going to get some answers from Taryn,” Naruto said, “what does she need that stupid cart for anyway?”
“I suppose she wants to take Itachi’s body with her.” She hesitated. “Do you really think it was Sasuke?”
“Of course,” Naruto said, “who else could it have been?”
“So where is he then? Why do you think he left? I mean… shouldn’t he have attacked Taryn too? He doesn’t like her at all.”
“Yeah,” Naruto said, “I don’t know.”
Kakashi kneeled down next to Taryn. “They should be back any minute,” he told her.
Taryn nodded, but didn’t look at him. Her eyes stayed focused on Itachi.
“We can make it to Konoha before dawn,” Kakashi continued.
“I’m not taking him to Konoha,” Taryn said.
“Eh? Taryn… Itachi was a missing nin from Konoha. He carries valuable information on Akatsuki. You know Tsunade…”
Taryn gave him a cold look and he didn’t finish his sentence.
“What are you going to do then?” he asked with a sigh.
“I’m taking him to Suna,” Taryn answered, “I’ll burry him there.”
“You cannot be serious.” She turned away from him. “Taryn…”
“I’m not asking for your approval, Kakashi. If you don’t want to help me then get lost.”
Kakashi sighed. He hardly recognized the girl at his side. She seemed older and had a hard expression on her face. Her eyes were cold and empty. He had seen that look once before… in Sasuke’s eyes. It concerned him.
A rattling sound made him look up. Sakura and Naruto pulled a cart into the ruins. “They’re back,” Kakashi said.
Taryn nodded. She leaned toward Itachi and took off the necklace he had always worn and tied it around her own neck. Then she took the blanket from her shoulders and covered him with it. She slowly lifted Itachi.
“I’ll take him,” Kakashi said softly, but Taryn shook her head and carried him towards the cart.
She ignored Kakashi’s students who were giving her all kinds of looks, from curiosity to anger. Kakashi slowly followed her. When she moved up to the front to pull the cart, he held her back. “Let me do that.” When she started to protest, he cut her off. “You’re exhausted Taryn.”
Taryn sighed, but let him pull the cart and walked beside it herself. Kakashi’s students followed in a slower pace, the last being Naruto who had his hands in his pockets and kicked against some pebbles. He frowned. He wanted to know what had happened and go after Sasuke and it irritated him that Kakashi wouldn’t let him talk to Taryn. He was angry with her for caring about Itachi, but he knew she wasn’t a bad person. He even considered her a friend. He knew somewhere she cared about Sasuke too, even if she would never admit it. She had stood up against Itachi once to protect him. He knew he shouldn’t judge her like that. She had lost someone she loved.
Sakura glanced nervously at Naruto. She hoped he wasn’t going to do anything stupid. She sighed and glanced at the cart. She wondered what kind of person Itachi Uchiha had been for Taryn to care so much. She didn’t seem like the type to have a friendship with criminals. She glanced at Taryn’s leg. The girl was limping a bit and blood was seeping through her pants. The wound didn’t seem that bad though. And she was afraid to offer to heal it. She sighed again and hoped they would reach Suna soon.
Taryn kept silent as she walked beside the cart. She needed to think, but her thoughts stayed incoherent. She couldn’t focus and she didn’t want to answer any questions either. She wished now that she could be more like Sai. It must be wonderful to be so emotionless, to feel nothing. She only felt empty. Who would have thought emptiness could hurt so much? It was going to be a long walk to Suna.
Even though it was a shorter journey than if they would have come straight form Konohagakure, it was still a full day’s walk. She hadn’t even thought about the commotion that would follow her arrival. Itachi had been part of Akatsuki after all, an organization that had attacked and kidnapped the Kazekage, her brother. But she couldn’t take him to Konoha. She would never let Danzou get his hands on Itachi’s body.
Taryn’s hands became fists and her eyes grew even colder.
“There’s more… The man who started the first rebellion during Hashirama’s reign was one of Uchiha’s best fighters… Madara Uchiha…”
Taryn narrowed her eyes. ‘Politics.’ Would it ever end?
Her eyes rested on the blanket that covered Itachi and she sighed, unaware that Sai was glancing at her curiously. He suddenly remembered something she had asked him when they first met. She had asked him why he had changed his mind abut killing Sasuke. He glanced at Itachi’s body. He knew about their relation. If Sasuke had killed Itachi, why didn’t Taryn go after him? It didn’t seem like she was planning to. What had made her change her mind about killing Sasuke?
Sai looked up at the sky. “There’s a bird coming this way,” he said.
Taryn looked up too and recognized the hawk as Hiro’s summon. She walked up ahead and stretched out her arm so it could land on it. “Kera,” she greeted the bird in a flat tone.
“You were hard to find,” the bird said a bit unfriendly, “Do you even know how much you worried Hiro and his friends?”
Taryn stared at Kera. She wasn’t really used to being scolded by a bird and Hiro had signed the contract only recently. But she wasn’t in the mood to get angry. She was just tired. “I had things to do that didn’t involve them,” she said.
Kera narrowed her eyes at Taryn. “Perhaps you should have told them that,” she said, “it would have saved me the trouble of going to find you. I’m a trained ninja hawk you know, not a messenger bird.” “Well, as you can see,” Taryn said, “we’re on our way back, so tell them to stop worrying.”
Kera glanced at the cart and surprisingly enough withheld from any comment. She nodded and pushed off from Taryn’s arm, flying in the direction she had come from.
Large cuts had appeared on Taryn’s forearm from Kera’s talons but she hardly paid it any attention. She stared after the hawk with a tired expression on her face and sighed.
“We’re almost there,” Kakashi softly spoke to her. He had switched positions a while ago and now Naruto and Sakura were pulling the cart.
Taryn didn’t look at him, but he knew she had heard him. She straightened herself and continued towards her hometown.
The others slowly followed her. Most of the journey had been spent in silence, but no one really minded. They were al occupied with their own thoughts.
When the gates of Suna came within view though, the atmosphere changed. Naruto seemed impatient, Taryn nervous and Kakashi gave concerned glances towards is friend. She seemed uncomfortable and she should be. After all, she was bringing the body of the man hat had almost succeeded in killing her brother. He knew it had caused some strife between them in the past and he wondered if this would crack their relation even more. For her sake he hoped it wouldn’t. He knew how much she loved her brother. But she loved Itachi too.
They stopped in front of the gate and a Jounin came to meet them. “Taryn-sama,” he said and glanced at the cart. “Who…” He stretched out his hand to lift the blanket, but Taryn grabbed his wrist. “Please inform my brother of my return and ask him to meet me here,” she said.
The Jounin blinked at her confused, glanced at his companions and nodded. “Alright. Wait here.” He motioned for another ninja to take his place and entered the village.
“What are we waiting for now?” Naruto asked.
“Permission,” Sai calmly answered. He looked at Naruto’s confused face. “Since Itachi is a missing nin, we can’t just take him into the village.”
And that wasn’t all. Taryn’s actions might be considered treason.
They didn’t have to wait long. Gaara approached then with Kankuro and Temari not far behind. He stopped in front of her and gave her an emotionless look.
“Hi,” Taryn muttered.
Gaara didn’t answer her. He lifted a tip of the blanket and looked underneath. He sighed and turned to Taryn. “You just can’t help yourself, can you?” he said.
“I just need a place to burry him,” Taryn said.
“In Suna,” Gaara finished.
“In Suna,” Taryn confirmed calmly.
“You expect me to allow a missing nin, a criminal, to be buried among Suna shinobi who gave their lives for the village?!”
“No,” Taryn said, “just a corner of the village where no one ever visits.”
It was silent for a long time. Gaara glanced at Kakashi and his teammates, sighed and looked back at Taryn. “He should be sent to Konoha.”
“I won’t let Konoha have him,” Taryn growled. She would never allow Danzou to get his hand on Itachi’s body. She would burn it sooner.
Kakashi cleared his throat. “I think… Tsunade-sama would understand, considering the circumstances.”
“Alright then,” Gaara said, “do as you wish, but don’t involve anyone else in this, Taryn.”
Taryn nodded.
“And I expect a full report,” Gaara continued, “since you left the village of your own accord.”
“Okay,” Taryn answered.
“Go on then, before you draw anymore attention.” There were already several shinobi that gave them curious glances.
Taryn was surprised when Temari and Kankuro stepped in to take over the cart. When she looked at Kankuro questioningly he rolled his eyes at her. It almost made her smile. And cry. After everything she had done, they would still have her back. She knew very well that she didn’t deserve that.
Slowly she followed them further into the village.
Hiro ran across the village with Kuro and Daro close behind. “Come on. Kera said they were on their way back. They should be in the village by now.”
“Are you sure about the cart?” Kuro asked. But before Hiro could answer the three boys came to a halt.
Hiro gasped when he saw Taryn walk beside a cart that was being pulled by two of her siblings. Not far behind he saw Kakashi and his students. And Gaara. “Who do you think it is?” Hiro asked softly. Daro eyed Taryn carefully and looked at his friends.
“You think it’s Itachi?” Kuro asked.
The boys exchanged glances and then started following the group on a safe distance.
“So how did you become involved in this?” Gaara asked. He and Kakashi were softly conversing. Kakashi sighed. “We were tracking Sasuke when we noticed a large fight. By the time we got there, we only found Taryn. Itachi was already dead.”
“You think it was Sasuke then?”
Kakashi nodded. “She hasn’t said a word about it yet though.”
”She will,” Gaara answered. He glanced at Naruto. “I understand that you want answers. You want to chase after Sasuke. Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“Of course it is!” Naruto snapped, “we have to take him back to Konoha! He is my friend!”
Gaara stared at the angry boy. “Naruto, he may have been your friend once, but he will not be the same person you knew in Konoha. If he wanted to go back, he would have done it, don’t you think?” “Orochimaru just brainwashed him,” Naruto growled, “when we get him back home, everything will turn out right.”
Gaara turned his head away and nodded towards Itachi’s body. “Sasuke is a missing-nin now. There’s no way back from that. Look at what happened to his brother.”
“I don’t care about Itachi!”
“Nor do I,” Gaara said, “but I do care about my sister. And this is the last time I’ll ever have to deal with Itachi Uchiha.” He sighed when he noticed Taryn’s students behind Naruto. “What are you three doing here? You shouldn’t be here.”
“We volunteer,” Daro said bravely, “Taryn-sensei is our team leader. This concerns us too.” He flinched slightly when he met Gaara’s angry eyes. He knew he had spoken out of line, but it had been a team decision. They would be there for her.
“Does it now?” Gaara asked coldly.
Daro lowered his eyes.
“Gaara-sama…” Kuro spoke softly.
At the same time Hiro had opened his mouth. “We just want to…”
“Be quiet,” Gaara said. He rubbed his temple. He really didn’t want to deal with this, but he had assigned this team to Taryn himself. Should he scold them now for being loyal to her? “You’re acting as a team? Are you willing to face the consequences as a team too?”
“Yes sir,” Daro said.
His teammates nodded in agreement.
“Go then,” Gaara told them.
The boys hurried towards Taryn.
“Are you sure that was a good idea?” Kakashi asked carefully, “involving them like that?”
“If I had refused them,” Gaara said, “they would have ignored my orders anyway. They are loyal to my sister, but I don’t mind. I know she would never betray Suna. I don’t know how she does it… she has this natural authority. She’s a leader. People listen to her you know. They want to follow her.” Kakashi nodded in understanding. “Yeah. I know how it is. She’s not even aware of it though.” He smiled sadly. “But I suppose that’s part of her charm.” He paused for a moment. “So what consequences were you talking about?” He tried to sound casual.
Gaara shook his head. “I had to say something. Or else they think they can get away with anything.”
***
Even the wind was quiet today, but Taryn hardly noticed. She was staring at the small gravestone in front of her. It was still blank, but she would add an inscription later when she was alone.
Her students were silently flanking her. Daro was the one who had made the grave by using an earth based jutsu. She was a bit surprised that Gaara had allowed them to be here.
Her own siblings stood a few feet behind her with the team from Konoha, but she was ignoring them. Her thoughts were still with Itachi.
Next to her, Kuro stood with his head down and his hands clenched to fists. Perhaps he was remembering his brother’s death.
Taryn sighed. She didn’t want to share this moment with anyone. She wanted to say goodbye to Itachi alone. She crossed her arms over her stomach. She had a lot to think about. Only now she understood why Danzou had it out for her. He was afraid she might know the truth. Well, guess what. She did know the truth. The question was what she was going to do with it.
“Promise me you’ll never tell him.”
She had promised him that. Perhaps if she had thought about it, she would have known earlier. Perhaps she could have done something.
The thought kept occupying her mind, even though she knew it was useless. Nothing would bring him back. And even so, he would never have let her change his plans. All his life he had tried to push her away so she wouldn’t get caught in the mess. But now that she was involved she couldn’t just let it go. She wanted to avenge him. But it wasn’t just her anymore.
Her hand slid slightly below her stomach and rested there for a moment. Suddenly she couldn’t take it anymore. She turned around and walked away from the grave without so much as glancing at the others. She could stand here looking at the grave forever, but it wouldn’t change a thing. Itachi would still be dead. She would still carry all his secrets. No one would ever know what a hero he really was. Because she had promised him.
Naruto watched Taryn leave and made to follow her, but Gaara stopped him. “Give her some time to grieve,” he told his friend, “I know you want answers, but she won’t give them when she’s like this. Trust me I know. You are welcome to spend the night in Suna. Tomorrow we will talk. Can you wait one more day, Naruto?”
Naruto narrowed his eyes, but knew Gaara was right. Besides, they wouldn’t find Sasuke now. He would have to wait for Taryn to return. He sighed and nodded at Gaara. “One day,” he said.