You broke me and taught me
To truly hate myself
Unfold me and teach me
How to be like somebody else
Lost & Found ~ Lianne Le Havas
Tyler
If you'd told me ten years ago that I'd be rooted to the spot in fear because I was face to face with my father, I would've burst out laughing and called you a dumbass.
But I wasn't laughing now. The only noise I felt like making was a scream.
When I was younger he seemed like hero. Now he was something out of a horror movie. His skin was waxen, almost flaky in some areas. His elongated face was no longer one of elegance - it looked like something you'd draw when asked to create a monster. He ran his dirty claw-like hands over his mouth as he came out the shadows. He seemed to grin, but it might just have been the effect the blood encrusting what little remained of his lips. I shuddered, watching him draw closer with a limp in his step. How had this man ever been my idol?
"Why are his veins like that?" Troye whispered, eyeing Monty the way a prey would watch a predator in the distance. I glanced at Monty's grimy arms. As he moved forwards, I saw an unusual flash of colour. He had golden veins. They were prominent, almost straining to break free of the rotting skin. I'd seen a Lightning's veins go like that before casting, but he wan't making a spell. I had no clue what he'd done.
Phil knew the answer though. "It's injections. Like the ones I was given, to make powers malleable."
"Did he give himself injections?"
"If he wanted more power, then it's possible."
"Well of course he wanted power," I said, voice harsher than the others. So harsh that Monty caught it. And he smiled at me.
"My son knows me so well," he said, in a voice that made us all shiver. "How have you been, boy?"
"Okay. Better than I ever was with you."
He clicked his black tongue. Like a snake. "Oh come now. You said you wanted to see the stars boy. So I showed you them."
"No. What you showed me was death and destruction."
"But you liked it. Being a phoenix in a fire, safe from harm. That's what you are, my boy. But I guess you're not a boy so much any more, are you?" A howl lurched out his throat for a moment. It was animalistic - bestial. I winced as the dissonance echoed round us. But he recovered swiftly, and carried on as if it hadn't happened.
"I'm so so proud of the man you've become. My shooting star. I can see myself so clearly in you. We-"
"I'm nothing like you," I spat. My spit reached him. And landed on his face. Without a sound.
It took a moment for him to react - and when he did, it was with painful slowness. He wiped his cheek with two fingers, as if painting army stripes. Then he took four steps forward, fully breaking out into the harsh light. His voice ticked over dully when he spoke. "Really now? Is that how you want to treat your old man? Like a rat?"
"I mean, some people keep rats as pets. You're just a pest. Like a cockroach."
His lip twitched. "I thought you'd be pleased to see me."
"Why would I be? You broke me. I've hated myself for years because whenever I've looked at what I did I've felt like crying. I was never good enough to be evil, and until recently I thought I was too evil to be good."
"Well that's in the past-"
"I'd hoped you'd died. The day you walked away I was relieved. I thought it was finally over. But you and Korey don't like being dead for long."
"Why can't people in your family just stay dead?" Troye asked.
Monty's head jerked. His sunken eyes were widening and narrowing constantly as he acknowledged Troye for the first time. Unblinkingly, with his head cocked to the side, he stared Troye down. "And who might you be?"
"I'm Tr-oye."
He glanced at Troye's slightly-blue hands. "A Water, I see."
"There's nothing wrong with that," I said, taking a hold of Troye's hand instinctively.
"Ha! Of course there-... Are you with that? Oh my... My own son... You chose to consort with a Water?"
"Love is not a choice."
His slackened mouth contorted into an embittered smile, revealing his cracked teeth. "Don't I know it."
A part of me wanted to say something, to question him, but he'd moved on to soon. He cocked his head at Phil, neck cracking in the process."And who's this lanky emo? No, don't tell m- Oh. It can't be... Wonder boy? The Amazing Phil Lester?"
He stood straighter. Taller. Stronger. "Yes."
"So you ran away to become a soldier to someone else? How charming. You always told people you were a pacifist, you little liar." Monty cackled violently - sounding too similar to my own, but his was tinted with a psychotic nature I couldn't match.
Phil may have given the impression of strength before. But it was terror holding him up. And it leaked into his broken words. "I didn't want to fight. But I was losing everything. My job, my house, my human rights... If I'd known you'd be here, at the end of it all, I'd never have joined. Ever. I never intended to see you ever again."
"I'm afraid to say it's only going to get worse for you."
"What does that mean?"
But Monty's mind was already elsewhere, again. He was shaking his head with glee. "So much betrayal lies in this building. Betrayal of you, Lester, running away from the greatest of destinies to become a teacher. Betrayals of Yokela's, running after Vegas to become nobodies in the shadows. Betrayal of the water, no doubt, picking my son over the family comforts. No wonder she's craving for your dead bodies."
"How did you know I was a teacher?"
Clearly Phil didn't care about being wanted dead.
I stared at him dumbfounded for a long moment. "Really? That's the bit you're worried about?"
Monty had already started speaking over me though. "I kept tabs on you. I might be locked in here but I have sources. Many sources. I know all about you, Lester. Maybe too much, when it comes to matters of your heart. But don't go thinking you're special. I kept tabs on most - bar this ungrateful oaf who ran off with his mother."
I didn't feel any hurt from his words. He'd been dead to me a long time ago. "What about Korey then? You know what he's been up to?"
"Oh god no. Don't mention that one. That son well and truly failed me. But you - you Mathew. You showed so much power-"
"My names Tyler now."
"Really? Well, Tyler, I have to say that despite you're power, you're on the losing side of the game. I mean, then again, every side is losing now. Even my own. Bunch of traitors. I can't believe my own son would team up that bitch."
"What's Korey done?"
He just shook his head, muttering "He was always a turncoat. Always always a turncoat."
Who had Korey sided with to make him classified a turncoat? If he wasn't with the resistance, or the Elemental Party then-
Oh god.
"Is he working with Khanye-Knot?"
Monty burst out laughing, with the noise deflating on his lips. "Why of course! He's as poor as a street urchin without her! Nasty piece of..."
Monty's irate murmurs continued, but I wasn't paying attention. I was horrified. He was working with the woman who'd gladly have us all dead. The woman who was should've been too despicable a human to even exist. The women who filled naive minds with outdated teachings to excuse her segregation. She was a disgrace. And Korey had fallen from grace by siding with her.
Why did he do it?
I guessed I could see why he went down that path... in a way. After the Vegas Massacre he'd been entirely alone. No me, no Monty, no mom. But we had known the president, before she became the president. She was just Kayce when we were kids. Nothing like the notorious villain I knew her as now. If Khanye-Knot was offering him safety and money, he could've been desperate enough to take it... but there would've been other people to turn to. Other people who had been in the Elementalist Movement to help him get back on his feet...
"Why would he turn on his own kind?"
Monty didn't answer. But he'd stopped his incensed mutterings. Now he just cackled. A hollow, witch cackle that rose to the heavens.
Phil didn't allow him to cackle long. "He's not the only one to turn on his own kind. You and your crazy experiments were a type of betrayal too."
"How so?"
"You made me a monster."
"Oh no, you did that yourself Little Lester."
And time pulled the breaks once more. We all froze over. Glacial style for once. Monty hadn't spoken the booming words words. It was a new voice, inked with malice. No one had to question who it was. We all recognised the patrons in tone. We'd heard it broadcast enough times alongside trumpets to know who it was.
No one turned to look at Khanye-Knot immediately. But we heard the click of her heels grow as she strode into the cell. And we felt the chill she naturally radiated. And we smelt the strong scent of sweet perfume disguising her deeds with the dead. Beads of sweat began to decorate my brow. Troye's hand in mine grew clammy. But I held on, knowing he was my only stability.
Her steps stopped. She tapped her foot patiently. In a beat slower than time itself. Monty turned around, vacant expression unchange. No emotion fled over his face as his now monotonous voice said "Hello sweetheart."
"Silence, fool. Your part is done."
That was the queue for the rest of us to turn.
Upon seeing her, my first thought was that she was anything but a sweetheart. She was the stuff of nightmares, in a way Monty wasn't. She was a post-nightmare, tricking people with the light of day into thinking it was fine, when the real horrors had only just begun. Her crooked lips were as red as the blood she'd spilt. Unforgiving eyes reflected her grey soul within, shielded by her drooping eyelids. Her imp-like features aged by her rants of fire. She was formidable.
I wished I'd never turned around.
As we came face to face with her, her expression morphed into one of mock pleasure at seeing the rest of us. And it made none of us feel at ease.
"Good to see you all again. Phil Lester, how much you've grown! Why, it must be almost a foot difference, yes? And Yokela, oh Yokela. You look so little like your mother. I would ask you how she is but I saw her a minute ago, before surgery. Such fun! And my my, Troye Mel-"
"We haven't met before," he interrupted coldly.
She inclined her head, but said nothing.
She kept her expression light until the door opened again. This time it was two guards, dragging a body between them. For a millisecond her expression flickered with wrath. But then she regained control, and composure.
"What are you doing?"
"We found this one snooping ma'am, and we thought you'd wanna know," one guard said, as they both dropped the body. It crumbled, appearing to be little more than a pile of cloth.
Korey rushed through the door a moment later. "There must be some mistake-"
"No mistake sir. They was unlocking the cells. For the resistance. The fucking swine-"
"I'll have none of that vulgar language here, thank you," the president scolded. That had me on the brink of laughter. She found that vulgar, but the conditions of these places perfectly fine? Someone needed to sort out their priorities.
"Sorry. It's just- we found him leading a troop of them vermin around the place. But that's not all. They've been givin' resistance people details for a while. Left codes with one of them. And's been fiddling with security settings in other camps to let them get in easily."
"That can't be true," Korey said. "Do you know who your accusing? It's an outrage! It's a scandl-"
The president put out her hand in a stopping motion. "Oh but it probably is true. You can never trust someone who comes as a traitor. Who's to say they won't betray you next?"
Korey was still in disbelief. As he turned the person, he said, "You wouldn't do this. Tell them you didn't... You didn't, did you?" There was still a gleam of hope in his eyes. It was a ridiculous hope. We had been given help, in obvious and subtle ways. I'd never truly thought about how simple it'd been to enter most confinements. But it was obvious. Someone had to be making it easier, from the inside. And before, someone had given Troye codes for the confinements. Perhaps this person was the one?
The person didn't answer. And the silence had everyone growing anxious. We waited for a sign, but nothing changed.
After a suspension of quiet, the body was kicked by a guard. "Speak boy."
A few more seconds passed. Nothing. Except distant cries and clangs of metal.
Just as the guard raised her foot again, there was a shudder. The crumpled pile began to move, revealing the wounded person beneath. My breath caught when I saw their face - his face.
It was Connor.
He'd been helping us?
"I had no choice. I can't keep working for the wrong side."
Korey shook his head over and over. Like a ritual. If he did it enough times, he might've been able to convince himself it was all dream and he'd wake up soon. "It's not the wrong side-"
"Don't bother with him Korey. He's not worth it."
"Since when have you been able to see someone's worth?" I snapped at her. That response shocked myself. Connor wasn't worth it. He'd almost had Troye and I killed.
But he'd been helping the resistance too.
"Where do I begin? I have many prime examples in this room don't I? Like Phil here." She smiled at him with eyes brimming in light of the memories. "Such a bright boy. Such a glorious future. Had the imagination the others had lost. But he lost himself in that fantasy. Believing in an impossible vision. So he gave up on his glory for a "happier" low life. What a shame it was all for nothing. I mean, you have nothing now."
"I still have someone," he said quietly.
"Oh? Well, I'm afraid he's not quite here any more."
Phil grew stiff in a second. "What did you do to him?"
She smirked. "Wouldn't you like to know."
"In actual fact, I would. What did you do?"
"All in good time."
That answer wasn't good enough. And Phil wasn't someone who could be silenced when it came to Dan's fate.
It started as a sudden breeze. In a matter of seconds it swelled into something more. I felt the polar wind whip around us. Cutting me like daggers. We all shivered. A second later I saw the blast. Heading right for the president. At a frighting speed.
But she didn't duck. Or move.
She just laughed.
And the wind died.
"Oh my, don't you remember anything Little Lester? I can still control you."
She rotated her wrists outwards. A click of bone. Right away his eyes rolled back. Blood dribbled from his lips. And he lost his footing. He staggered back. Without sight. Troye and I ran to him, holding him up before he went crashing to the floor. He was heavy. But somehow we pushed him back up. He was still weak on his feet, eyes unfocused, so we stayed at his side. Until Khanye-Knot said, "Restrain the other two boys."
In a flash Troye and I were hauled away from Phil, from each other. And we were locked down a guard each. I struggled out of her grasp for a second - but when a metal device was held to my neck, I stopped. Something on it's end latched to my neck, causing my breath to catch. It was weapon. Of what kind - I didn't know. But any type of movement would be a bad idea. If it was a gun, my head would be blown off immediately, without hesitation. And I wasn't too keen on that thought.
Troye wasn't thinking the same way. Even with the weapon against his neck he wriggled and squirmed. Not to escape their grasp, but to get his hands free. And let a blast of water escaped. And he did so. An orbe of blue. Spinning out of control towards Khanye-Knot. And it got closer- closer- closer- closer-
And it did nothing.
Why didn't that work?
No one said a word. Everyone had been rendered speechless. No one had expected that - except the president. Who smiled maliciously. Knowingly.
"Silly boy. I've made myself immune to the powers of my protégés."
He shook his head, speaking slowly. "I'm not one of your protégés. I'm pretty sure I'd remember something as horrifying as that."
"But that's where you're wrong Troye Sivan Mellet."
Using his whole name seemed to make everything worse. And her almost happy tone had me grinding my teeth together.
"How can I be-?"
"Why don't you tell us a bit about your adolescence."
"What does that have to do with-"
"Just do as she says," I said, eyeing her with utmost suspicion. I didn't know what she was playing at, but I didn't think it'd be good trying to defy her, this time.
Troye ran his fingers down his shaking arm. "There's much to tell. I went to school. Hated it. Like everyone. I had a few friends but didn't have that much in common with anyone. Instead of getting the bus I rode there on my bike, which I was only knocked off once. I had-"
"Care to give more details about when you fell off your bike?"
Troye frowned, glancing at me to see if I had any inkling of why she'd asked that. But I didn't. I still had no clue what game she was playing.
"I don't remember much about it. I mean it was pretty bad. Lot's of blood. I was in hospital for a month. But the nurses and doctors were nice. I remember a nurse named Marsha who-"
"-always smelled of pine wood," Connor said at the same time.
"Yeah... How did you-"
"Continue," Khanye-Knot commanded.
With final vexed glance at Connor, Troye went on. "The only downfall was the food. It was horrible. They gave us this chicken soup that-"
"-tasted like dust. If dust has a taste. It's put me off chicken soup for life," Connor said in sync with him again.
"Fuck."
Troye was in a state of discomposure, staring at Connor with bewilderment. "How do you know what I'm about to say? Do you have some telepathic power?"
The president waved her hand dismissively. "They're the default memories. Fake. Implanted when you were tested on. Connor has the same memoriezt. As do my other test subjects from after the France trials."
"How long was I tested on for?"
"A month or so."
"But my family-"
"Never knew. I mean, they gathered something had gone on. That's why the minute you were let out of hospital you left Australia."
"We left because dad got offered a job here," he said in a small voice, inked with doubt for his own reason.
"He searched for the job himself. He wanted to get out as soon as possible."
Troye looked away, eyes overflowing with the new found truth. I wished it wasn't true. But there was something in Troye's forlorn expression that told me it all made sense to him. I wanted to get close to him, to comfort him any way I could. But I didn't know how. And I couldn't move. So I just watched him from afar, hoping this was just warped facts.
"I know your tale very well from then. A move to the land of the free. A hatred for the other new kid, Yokela. A bond after a teacher in the same state as you decided to make his own experiment. It's very interesting. Very original. But there is some details I couldn't gather from sources. Tell me, have your two veins played up at all?"
"How'd you know about that?" I snapped.
"Well, it's just that we found in France that some people who were in close contact with one another ended up with... odd occurrences in their veins when apart."
"Bullshit."
"Phil, care to share your knowledge?"
Phil's eyes watered as a strained voice left his throat. "Those who were aggressive ended up with their veins going weird. If you were close with an earth, when apart, their veins went branch like. If you were close with a wind your veins when transparent. Light to silver. Lighting led to lightning. But Fires never got close to anyone, and neither did Waters. They stayed by themselves. And their veins didn't change."
"Well, they did. And they're right here, right now. Fire to ice. Water to ash."
"So you tested on me to?" I spun round to face Monty. "You let her make me a test subject?"
The president smiled cheerlessly. She patted Monty's balding head. "He's been my own subject for years. Went a bit wild for a while, but I've reined him in."
"I had no choice. Mathew I didn't know-"
"Stop calling me that! My name's not Mathew. It's Tyler."
The president leered at me. "Trying to be a big boy now, distancing yourself from what you did?"
"Well at least I realised I was going down the wrong path, unlike you."
She laughed. It was a cold, hard laugh, with eyes unmoving. "We all travel down the same road. You only think yours is different because you're in the shade."
"Now back to the matter of Troye's tale, I have some blank spaces to fill. When you were caught by Connor and his little gang in your town, you fell unconscious at one point, yes?"
"Yeah..."
"Well, they scanned the code, and we checked your progress. Having you put in hospital was another bonus. We got to try out a couple more serums, test more reactions. Splendid stuff."
"I don't believe any of this," Troye said, digging the heels of his hands into his eyes as if to forget the truth.
"That's you're choice."
"You couldn't have tested Troye. There's no solid proof." Perhaps I'd been tested on, but perhaps being close to him had transferred some effects. Perhaps it was just happened to those close with test subjects. Although Dan's had never changed, and he'd been close to Phil...
"You want proof? That's fine. Korey, get the razor."
"WHAT THE-"
"Shave the back of Troye's head. Show them."
Korey went over to the wall, where a metal case was hung. He rummaged through, instruments of torture creating screaming clangs. Eventually Korey pulled out a razor. He walked over to Troye, not without a quick glance at Connor - the boy he'd trusted for a long time.
"I haven't agreed to this," Troye said feebly.
"Do you want hard evidence or not?" Korey said with a hollow voice.
He looked over at me for my opinion. But I didn't have one. If he didn't allow it, they'd surely find some demeaning way to prove it. If they did do it, chances were there was nothing to see, and they would seem foolish. But then, if they did shave it, and something was there...
Troye reluctantly agreed, turning his head ever so slightly, the nozzle of the weapon pressing further into his neck. The guard holding him moved slightly, still pressing the weapon firmly against Troye, to give Korey enough room to shave. And the curls fell like feathers. Falling gracefully, without knowing there was nothing left for them now. Cut by cut I watched my strength fade. This was a fragile moment. Seconds away from smashing.
After an eternity Korey backed away, a bitter smile on his face. He hadn't shaved as much as I'd thought, but he didn't have to. We could all see it.
Underneath Troye's hair, at the base of his skull, was a symbol. Like it'd always been there. A mark of the dark literally looming at the back of his head, patiently waiting to destroy everything. And it did. Everything was shattering and it was my mistake. Coincidences didn't just happen. Troye and I had always been linked. I should've known. I should've seen this coming from the start.
There, on the back of his head, was the most haunting barcode I'd ever seen.
A/N
Okay so the next chapter is like half written I just felt like updating okay you can rant if you want (the @ button is free) but that's life let me live I'm only smol kill me after the next one
Curious question time - have any of you ever imagined a character because of a song? This is kinda odd but the song Gold by Imagine Dragons inspired me when it came to writing Monty, because it sounds chaotic and ever so slightly creepy and when I heard it for the first time I was like "yes. it him." idk maybe I'm just mental ah well
Lil catch up - in the TroylerFanficAwards this trashy story came 2nd in two categories (Favourte supernatural/fantasy AU, Most Memorable Line) and third in another two (Favourite Ongoing Fanfic, Reference Queen). O.O . I'm still overwhelmed by being placed alongside such brilliant authors, most of whom inspired me to write when I first began this, and it's just incredible so um thank you so so much everyone who voted for this, you made my heart beat out my chest when I found out. AHHHHH. Okay. I'm totally fine.
EXCITING NEWS: So, with the ending of Icy Inferno in sight, I've been brainstorming ideas for a new story for a few while. A long while. And it is finally a thing: It's called The Course of True Love and it's a pastel/punk phan and troyler story. I've just put up the prologue and it'd mean a lot to me if you would check it out, as I'm still unsure whether to continue ^-^
Ily a lot mes petits pois and I'll see you soon!
Emma x
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