«DAY 4»
Luke
It seems as though every time I close my eyes now, I dream about her.
It's never been this bad before. And never have my dreams thrown back an actual memory at me. Like this one;
"What's your name?" I asked the girl in the hospital bed, and she looked up from her novel, her warm hazel eyes meeting mine. She pus down the book, careful not to touch the different coloured cords plugged into her arm. It was the first time I'd been brave enough to start a conversation with her. And also the last.
"Who are you?" Jane Doe asked in a small, shy voice.
"Luke," I squeaked nervously.
"Oh."
"I think you're really pretty," I told her, blushing.
"Thank you," she grinned, her cheeks a rosy red. Her shoulder-length blond hair fell forward and she pushed the strands behind her ear. I swallowed anxiously, mesmerised by the act.
"So, um, are you feeling better?" I asked.
"Yes, but I'm scared. I'm having a really big surgery tomorrow," Jane said quietly. "What if I die?" She whispered.
"You won't die," I told her.
"How do you know?"
"I just do."
And that was the last time I saw her ever again.
Because the next day when I came back to the hospital, she was gone. There was not a piece of Jane that was left behind.
What if I die? Her voice rings through my head.
Suddenly, the hospital room lurches and the floors swallow me whole. When I open my eyes, I'm in an operation room, just a few corridors down her room. There are doctors in white jackets working on a patient on the table. It's Jane. One doctor raises a sharp knife above his head, gleaming and reflecting off the harsh lights of the operation room.
That's when I hear her scream. And the knife makes a plunging sound as it makes contact with her skin.
Lissa
"So you walked in on Luke, bare ass naked?!" Michael roars once he hears the story, bending over in laughter. Calum joins him, and Ashton silently stuffs more popcorn in his mouth. I try to shush them, cheeks burning, afraid to wake Luke up. For the past six hours, he's been asleep a few seats behind us, oblivious to the noise Michael's been making. The boys were given a day off to travel to their new destination. So with leisure, we'd finished packing up late afternoon and got on the plane a few hours ago.
"What did you think? Did you jerk off after?" Calum teases.
"N-no!" I sputter. "Of course not!"
"Have you even touched yourself before?" Ashton asks, displaying a mouthful of popcorn. Calum shoots him a disgusted look.
"Um...no," I admit.
Michael feigns shock. "Duuuude, masturbating is great," he says in wonder. "Try it sometime."
"Um-"
"I bet she doesn't even know how," Calum adds, cackling. Michael and Ashton laugh with him.
"Shut up," I reply, with a roll of my eyes. The boys look at me, then look at each other and let out a loud howl.
"Attitude, Lissa!" Michael gasps dramatically, making me giggle.
"That's probably the fiercest thing you've ever said in your life," Calum jokes, watching Ashton shovelling an entire handful of popcorn in his mouth. He shakes his head, grabs a fistful and feeds Ashton a few kernels at a time. The older boy smiles down at him with playful eyes.
I grin and look down at a text that Jackie has sent me back about my brother. I'd recorded her number from the call on Ben's phone last night and I can't believe I haven't asked for her number until now.
Jackie: So what did your boss say about a day off?
Oh, right. I still have to ask Luke about that.
I was originally planning on asking him last night, but after the...incident that happened in his room, I wasn't able to. I mean, what am I supposed to say after something like that? I'm sorry I walked in on you touching yourself, but I need a favour?
If Luke does decide to come, the plane tickets and the hotel fees will come with his job. Being the singer of a popular band has its perks, and with one word, he could fly me to my brother in no time.
But, in order to convince him, it's obvious he needs to like me first.
It's a plan.
If he is nice enough, if I am nice enough to him, he'll come with me. Maybe he'll be okay with it. Maybe he can convince Ben to let me go and see my brother. Just for a day.
Just for a day...
My fingers fly rapidly over the screen as I type a reply to Jackie.
Lissa: I didn't ask him yet. Is Dustin getting any better?
Jackie: No, but we're trying.
Lissa: I really thought he'd be fine on his own.
Jackie: We did too.
Lissa: Will it be really bad? If I didn't make it there this week?
Jackie: Maybe. But don't worry too much. The doctor came down to check on him today, said this was a completely normal reaction. Since it's the first time he's been away from you, after all. Needs time to cope, he said.
Lissa: I'm still worried.
Suddenly, I hear a bone-chilling scream that makes me jump. The boys and I turn around to see Luke, his eyes now wide open, gripping the seat. His face is ghostly white, breathing hard as he tries to recover from whatever he'd just experienced.
"Bad dream, Luke?" Michael asks, grinning lazily.
"Shut the fuck up, Clifford," Luke snaps angrily. "You're a waste of oxygen." He shoots daggers at Michael, who just shrugs nonchalantly. But I'm still shaken, and confused by Luke's unnecessary rudeness.
"Is Luke always this bad?" I whisper in Michael's ear, once the plane is silent again.
"He wasn't always," Michael replies thoughtfully. "He used to be hella fun, went out drinking and partying with us. He used to do it a lot."
I look at him with a raised brow.
"He gets bipolar sometimes," Michael explains. "I mean, it's not like he's officially diagnosed or anything, but from the first day I met him, he'd always had this angry side. He only occasionally goes back to sweet and normal Luke. In front of the cameras and the fans, at least. So just you wait. If you've seen his Hyde, you'll see his Jekal too."
The two of us look over our shoulders to glance at Luke, who now has in headphones and staring wide awake, out the window.
"You mean Hyde and Jekyll?" I whisper.
"Yeah. That," Michael chuckles.
"Is that why you hate him so much? Because he's bipolar?"
"I don't hate him," he says, but winces as soon as the words leave his mouth. "Actually, I do, just a little bit. We're what you call...uh..."
"Frenemies?" I suggest.
"Yeah. Frenemies," Michael says, looking like he has more to say. He stares down at his feet, as if considering whether he should or shouldn't go further.
"That's not why I hate him. I hate him because..." he starts, but lets out a long groan, running his fingers through his hair. Then he lowers his voice even more. "...Truth is, I'd liked Amber from the moment she stepped foot in my life. But she's with him. Luke, always been an ungrateful little bitch. Gets everything he wants, and he's never happy about it. People like me just suck it up and watch the good things be given to other people." He pauses, thinking. "Did you know whenever they fuck, I can hear them? They know I'm in the room right next to them and yet they do it, so that I feel the fucking ground moving and hear her screaming his name, and it kills me every. single. time," he says.
"Well..." I say, overwhelmed by the information. I'd never expected Michael to have an actual crush on someone, especially one that's supposed to be Luke's girlfriend. It's impossible for Michael to be with her, I know that now. If he was seen out with her, or even have a single photo snapped together, it would lead to chaos.
"Does she...is she...in love with Luke?" I ask.
Michael fiddles with his sleeve, his blue-green eyes looking into mine.
"I don't know," he sighs.
+
"Wake up," Michael says, shaking my shoulder.
I open one eye slowly, and realise I'd fallen asleep leaning against Michael's shoulder. Calum and Ashton are passed out in the seats across from us, and Luke's already at the back, getting his bags.
"Wake up!" Michael says louder, this time at Calum and Ashton. "We're here."
The two of them lazily open their eyes, and reaches sluggishly towards their baggage.
The security guard, a large bald man named Dave, walks inside. "The paparazzi is here," he says breathlessly, and the boys immediately groan.
"Stylists!" Ben shouts, and a team of two women in about their twenties crowd me immediately. (Where do these people even come from?) They introduce themselves as Bette and Jasmine. They've worked with Amber for years.
Within seconds, they've place a fedora on my head, tucked my hair over my shoulders, and put a pair of aviators over my eyes. "Don't take these off," they say, and then they push me off the plane where the cameras start clicking, blinding me for a second.
Walk with confidence, I tell myself. You're Amber Morrison, part time model and girlfriend of Luke Hemmings. You're fabulous.
"Stay next to me," Michael says, pressing up against me. Together, we turn the corner of the airport, pushing past the cameras. A journalist bumps into me, and someone's camera jabs me in the shoulder. But we make it to the front doors.
When we get closer, my breath hitches. The street outside the airport is filled with people; fans, holding cameras, screaming, crying, trying to push past the security guards. I push my sunglasses further up my nose and pray to god that I look like Amber.
"Ready?" Dave asks, and then he opens the door.
As we make our way down the path the fans made for us, one of them stop me for an autograph. Luckily, I've already learned how to replicate Amber's autograph.
"Amber, I love you so much," the girl gushes, her hand flying to her mouth.
"Uh, um, thanks. Thank you," I mutter with an awkward smile, and then Michael pulls on my sleeve to get me moving. We walk away from the crowd of people, Dave literally on our heels, barking at us to move. Finally, we make it to the tour bus, and I plop down in my seat with a deep sigh.
Michael turns to look at me. "Lissa, we were expecting something a little like..." He forces his voice to be high-pitched and nonchalant. "Thanks, love," he mocks Amber's smooth-as-butter, I'm-fabulous-and-I-know-it tone.
"Sorry, I forgot to use the Amber dictionary. I was just nervous," I say, blowing out air from my cheeks.
"Next time, chill with the hair flipping. You've exaggerated a bit. But you looked perfect. I was almost fooled," Ashton advises me.
"Okay, thanks," I laugh.
The bus begins to move.
I pull my knees up on the seat and press my palms against the window. "Whoa, this place is super cool," I say, looking out in wonder. The night sky casts a dark shadow over the tall towers and condos, and the city is alive in lights. There are lights everywhere, from cars, stoplights, and buildings.
"Is that the CN tower?" I gasp in wonder, pointing at a white building with a round dome at the top.
"Yep," Michael replies. "Welcome to Toronto."
"Can we go to Canada's Wonderland?" Calum asks with childish excitement.
"No. We're on tour, Calum," Ashton replies.
Luke:
Calum and Michael finish unpacking first, and head downstairs to pick up girls. When they've heard that we had the rest of the night to ourselves, they told Lissa they were meeting some friends, and she was so naive that she actually believed them.
"I'll stay," I tell them, and Michael shrugs, walking out the door first. Ashton follows him.
"Wanna come, Lissa?" Calum asks, the last one to leave.
Lissa's hand goes still from rummaging through her suitcase. She eyes me, and then looks down at the ground. "Uh, no thanks. I'll stay here."
"Allright, see you soon, then," Calum says, and the door closes behind him.
As soon as they're gone, I start pulling out my clothes to hang on the racks. Behind me, I can feel Lissa staring at me. Whenever I look behind my back, she tries to hide it.
Eventually, I glare right at her, catching her red-handed. "What?" I snap.
"N-nothing," Lissa says, busying herself with folding her clothes. "I'm just sorry about what happened last night."
I turn my face away from her, afraid that I may start blushing. "Whatever," I choke out. Then we plunge into silence again, but Lissa doesn't stop staring at me.
"So what is it? I know you didn't stay back just to give me that lame ass apology," I say, meeting her eyes.
"No, I didn't," Lissa replies quietly. She bites her lip, and then says it all in one big sentence: "I left my baby brother back in California and he really needs me right now; I thought he'd be fine by his own but I got a call yesterday and-"
"No," I interrupt, throwing a pair of jeans into the drawer.
"What?"
"The answer is no. You were going to ask me to go with you, right?"
"Yes," she says, her voice breaking. "I did." In her eyes, I can literally see her dreams shatter into a million pieces.
There is a long pause before she says her next words. "Just for a day," she begs. "He needs me right now, to feed him and-if I'm not, he'll-"
"How old is your brother?" I ask nonchalantly.
"He's fifteen." She pauses. "He's living in the St. Johns rehab centre for the disabled."
"We're back!" The boys shout, slamming the door open. Lissa quickly wipes at her eyes, erasing every bit of emotion from her face and smile at them like she wasn't just about to burst into tears. A few girls enter behind Michael, one Asian, two white. Apparently Calum has a thing for Asian girls...and from what I can see, white males with curly hair and dimples. I see and notice the signs around me, and I'm not even going to act surprised if their relationship gets revealed.
"Wow, you guys do have a lot of friends around the globe," Lissa says, fascinated. She glances at the three girls walking inside.
You idiot, I almost say out loud. they're not friends. They're playthings. You could even call them prostitutes, leftovers that Michael picked up within two minutes of flirting. I know, because I used to do it with him. There's usually a lobby or a hallway where the teens hang out, and most of the time, there's a hot girl or two. Then, it goes in either one way or the other. 1) They recognise us and immediately want to jump our bones 2) They've never heard of a 5 Seconds of Summer, but they think we're hot anyway so we take them home.
There's three this time, the Asian girl, and one with big breasts and a small, petite one with blond hair. And for a second, she reminds me of Jane herself. With short, blond hair that curls around her ear and slightly passes her shoulders in waves. I look away, afraid of the very thought of her. They all look at me, wearing matching flirty expressions. The Jane-lookalike drags her eyes over me slowly from top to bottom, not even trying to hide it. I look intently back at her, and she meets my eyes in the same gaze.
+
Lissa:
"Next question," the girl named Callie, I think, slurs, her eyes half shut. "Who do u love... most in this world?"
"Myself," Michael says right away, taking another swig from his beer.
"Why did I not expect that answer?" Luke mutters.
"Cuz you're a dipshit," Michael replies.
"Kaitlyn, wake up. You need to answer the question," Callie says, giggling. She taps her friend, the one named Kaitlyn, who's sprawled across the couch. Kaitlyn raises her head lazily to look at us and gives us a drunken thumbs-up.
"Luke, what about you?" The quiet blond girl asks. She hasn't had much to drink like the others. But I haven't even taken a single sip. She stares intently at Luke, like he's the most beautiful thing she's ever seen. But I guess Luke is used to that worshipping look already, because he hardly throws her a glance. Just like the other boys, who have no other interest in the girls except that they are there to drink with them.
Michael makes a hmmph sound. "Is that even a question?" He chuckles. "He loves Jane more than anything in the world."
"Who's Jane?" The blond girl asks, her eyes wide.
"Jane Doe. His imaginary girlfriend," Michael says, and Luke scowls at him.
"Awww!" The girl on the couch says drunkenly. "Where did you two meet?"
Luke looks like he doesn't want to share that bit of information, but he sighs and says reluctantly in a quiet voice:
"I met her at a hospital in California."
"That's a weird person to meet someone," the girl says.
"Maybe I've met her before," I say under my breath, and all the boys stare at me, their bodies tensing. "I live in California," I explain.
"Where in California?" Luke asks, his full attention on me.
"Sacramento."
His face falls immediately. "She was in San Jose."
"Sorry," I reply, biting my lip. "D-Do you look for her?"
"Every day. Just to see if she'll show up in the same place again," he mumbles, taking another gulp of beer. It's painful just to watch the burning liquid pass his throat.
"What about you, Lissa?" Michael asks, his eyes filled with curiosity.
"My brother," I reply right away. "He's all I have."
Luke doesn't meet my eyes.
"Where's Calum and Ashton?" Kaitlyn hiccups, her eyes falling closed again.
"I don't know. They disappeared," Michael says with a shrug. "Probably getting it on." Then he and Luke exchange knowing looks.
In the meantime I blink in surprise at Michael's words, but before I can ask what he means, I'm interrupted by someone else.
"How many girls have you guys slept with?" Kaitlyn asks Michael, cupping her chin in her hand.
"This month?" Michael asks, a cocky grin appearing on his face. "Four for Ashton. Three for Calum. And eight for me."
"Whoa," Callie says.
"What about you, Lukey?" Michael taunts Luke. "Zeeeero."
Luke ignores Michael's comment altogether, his face turning dark.
"I'm going to bed," he says, his voice suddenly hard, and then he storms past us. Seconds later, we hear the door closing. Frankly, I'm dying to get out of here as well. The energy of the drunken teenagers are draining me, and I really need some alone time after such a long day. A hot shower sounds good right now.
"So am I," I reply delicately, hoping to sneak past Michael. Maybe he'll be too drunk to notice me leave...
I stand up and wince once I feel Michael's hand grab my wrist.
"I'll come with you," Michael says, and then he tries to stand up, but the ground lurches beneath him and he stumbles. "Oops," he laughs drunkenly.
We walk down the hall and turn the corner together, Michael leaning on me for support. When we get to my door, I delicately pull him off me.
"Good night, Michael," I tell him.
"No, no, wait," Michael slurs, grabbing my hands. He plants a slobbery kiss on my cheek, pushing my spine into the wall.
I gather up all the courage I have in my body. "No," I say affirmatively, pushing him off me. I make an intimidating face at him. "I'm not in the mood, Michael. I'm going to sleep."
Michael looks down at the ground, and then back up at me, his eyes red and watery. "Don't you like me?" He asks. He leans forward and touches me again, this time, his hand on my waist. "You've never felt it before, have you? The feeling of being wanted....the feeling of touch..." he says, running his lip over my neck. Except it sounds a lot like 'tut' instead of 'touch'.
"Okay, okay," I say, avoiding his mouth. I put my palms against his chest, which does little to keep him away. "Listen to me, Michael. I do like you. I like you a lot," I tell him gently. "But I've known you for four days. And you have...someone else. You like Amber, don't you?"
Michael shakes his head, and then lets out a long groan, hanging his head. "You and I both know it won't work out," he barely gets out. "Plus, she won't be coming back for a while...can't I have a little fun in the meantime?"
"No, not really. Michael, you have a drinking problem. You shouldn't throw yourself at other girls, simply because Amber won't give you attention. You're better than those players who sleeps with a girl any chance he got," I say desperately, trying to tell him in the most gentle way possible.
Michael laughs manically, strands of his hair falling forward and in his eyes. He leans forward so that his lips brush against my ear, and I tense up completely, a gasp escaping from my mouth. "Kitten, you can't tell me what to do," he says seductively, making me shiver.
"Yes I can. Michael, I'm Luke's girlfriend. I can't be caught with you...as much as you and Amber can't," I say, and then regret the words as soon as they leave my mouth. Michael looks at me, and I can't meet his eyes. He was already feeling insecure about his unrequited crush, and even though I was trying to hard to be careful, I've just said the wrong thing.
Michael leans back and stares at me with emotionless eyes that seems to say: 'So Luke gets to have it all, huh?'
Then without saying a word, he turns and walks away, the beer sloshing in his hand.
Luke:
I'm just about to fall asleep, praying to god that Ben won't notice our hangovers tomorrow. Suddenly, my door opens, and Michael stumbles in, grabbing hold of the blond girl that's been eyeing me all night. She's only half-dressed; her blouse hanging open, and her jeans nowhere to be found. I'm guessing Michael had a taste before he'd brought her in here.
"This is Leila," Michael says, pushing the girl towards me. "She likes you."
And then he closes the door, leaving the Jane-lookalike in front of me, in just her lingerie and a blouse.
Sorry this chapter was kinda rushed (and super long lol)
Tell me any predictions you've made so far. Thanks for reading!
ALSO HOW HOT IS MICHAEL'S LITTLE MOANING SOLO IN SAFETY PIN OK AND LUKE LAUGHING IN SKH THE ALT. VERSION
THANK YOU AND GOODBYE