The next week passed in a blur and whirlwind of activity surrounding the plans and preparations for Brianna's Sweet Sixteen birthday party. Arianna saw very little of Jason during that time, but she did know that he and Brianna had talked on the phone almost every day. Arianna kept hoping that Jason would stop by, but he kept his distance. At first, she was angry that she hadn't seen him since the night they shared together, but she admitted to herself that he probably stayed away because of the way she reacted after their lovemaking. But every time the phone rung, she secretly hoped that it would be Jason on the other end professing his undying love to her. When he did phone, if she answered, he only spoke with her long enough to say a polite but brief hello, or make an offhanded attempt to inquire about her day or her health, and then almost immediately request to speak with Brianna. After about two days, she stopped answering the phone altogether for fear that it would be him on the other end and yet they would have the same stilted, strained conversations that they had the previous days.
Arianna heard from Anthony quite a bit during the week also. Long before Jason had walked back into their lives, Arianna had invited Tony to Brianna's birthday party in a half-hearted attempt to make a go of their awkward relationship. She knew that he was beginning to grow impatient waiting for a response to his proposal. Now just a day before the party, Arianna wondered if she acted in haste inviting him. She didn't want to hurt Anthony; he had been a really good friend to her when she needed one badly. But she knew that it wasn't fair to continue to string him along and allow him to hope for something that she just didn't think was possible. Anthony deserved someone that could love him wholeheartedly and without doubts and reservations and that was not Arianna. She only loved one man and she probably always would. With all the plans for Brianna's party finally complete, Arianna retired to her room wondering how she had made such a mess of her life, and the lives of the people she loved. It had been a week since she had been with Jason and lying in her bed all she could think of was being in his arms and letting him have his way with her. Tears filled her eyes and Arianna softly cried herself to sleep.
The next morning, Arianna awoke to the sounds of loud voices in her living room. She looked over at the clock on the nightstand. 11:00 a.m. Her head was pounding, as if she had been crying all night. And she had. After she thought about the mess she had created for herself, she cried herself to sleep. She stumbled out of bed and went into the bathroom. She looked at her reflection in the mirror in horror. Her face and eyes were swollen from a night of crying. She turned the cold water on and let it run. She took a washcloth from the closet and held it under the cool water. She put it on her face and held it there, hoping to reduce the swelling around her eyes. She did this twice more, and most of the swelling went down. She brushed her teeth and went to see who was in her house talking so loudly.
When she emerged from her bedroom and walked down the hall to the living room, Arianna found her mother and father, along with Theresa, her three girls, and Brianna. They were laughing a talking and didn't notice her come in. As she stood and watched her family enjoying this day, Brianna's birthday, she felt as if it were bitter sweet. Something, or rather someone, was missing. Jason. It could be so easy to try and imagine him here with her and Brianna and the rest of her family. That's all she ever dreamed about when they were together so long ago. But how could she be sure that he could fully open his heart to her. She never really doubted that he loved her then. But he kept parts of his life private and didn't share them with her and she wanted more. She wanted all of him or none of him. She couldn't settle for anything less than that. But try though she might, she could not drive the memory of the pain in his eyes and voice when she refused to marry him. Before she gave in to the tears that were threatening to start all over again, she joined her family. Brianna was the first one to notice her come in the room.
"Mama! Did we wake you?" she asked sheepishly.
Arianna laughed. "I don't even think Otis Redding could have slept through all the noise in here. What's going on?" she asked.
"Hey baby," her mother said. "Nothing. We just getting ready for the party. What time is it supposed to start? Ricky already down at the pastry shop setting the grill up out back."
"The invitations that we sent out say 1 o'clock. So you know what that means...2:00," they all laughed and said at the same time. They sat there laughing and talking and the door bell rung.
"Who could that be?" Arianna asked as she went to the door. A delivery guy from a florist shop was there with two big, beautiful bouquets of roses, one red and one pink.
"Is this the Jones residence?" he asked.
"Yes," Arianna replied.
"These are for you," he said as he handed her the flowers.
"Just a minute. Let me get your tip," said and she turned to get her purse. But the delivery guy stopped her.
"That's not necessary ma'am. That has already been taken care of. Good day ma'am." And with that he left.
Arianna returned to her living room where her family sat waiting with her arms ladled with flowers.
"Whoa, who knocked off the flower shop?" Theresa asked comically.
"I don't know. I haven't checked the cards yet," Arianna said. She sat down beside Brianna on the couch and she took the card out of the roses. The card from the pink bunch was addressed to Brianna. She handed the flowers and the card to Brianna. "Brie, these are for you."
Brianna's eyes were wide with surprise. "Who are they from Mama?" she asked.
"I don't know ladybug. Open the card and see."
Brianna opened the card and her eyes were bright with tears. "There from Daddy," she said.
"Read the card baby. What does it say?" Katie asked.
"It says here is a flower for each birthday I missed, and one for today. And a promise that as long as I live I will never miss another one. With love, Jason," she recited. Then she turned to Arianna. "Read your card Mama. What does yours say?" she asked.
Arianna opened the card. She read it silently to herself: I'm sorry. For EVERYTHING. You mean more to me than just great sex. Please reconsider. No pressure, Jase, the card read. Arianna felt heat spread all over her body. She could not read it out loud. Instead she said, "We had a fight last week before he left. It just says he's sorry." And she hid a secret smile behind the flowers.
Katie fixed her granddaughter's favorite breakfast for her special day, consisting of pancakes, scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast. They all sat around Arianna's kitchen table and ate together, laughing and reliving memories of Brianna's previous birthdays. Several times Arianna found herself thinking of Jason as the stories were being told, and she had pangs of guilt that none of the stories included him. But even though she may feel guilty about depriving him of watching Brianna grow up, she couldn't let that be the basis of a marriage between them.
After the breakfast was over and the kitchen cleaned, they continued to get ready for the party. Since it was the middle of summer and one of the hottest days so far for the season, Arianna decided to wear a light and cool, cotton summer dress. The dress was a deep purple, sleeveless dress with an almost dangerously too low neck line, that came just below the knee. She wore matching peek toe pumps which made the whole outfit contrast perfectly with her caramel complexion. She wore her cropped hair swept back and thought it gave her eyes more emphasis. Never one to wear much makeup, she opted for purple and onyx eye shadow and a touch of tinted lip gloss.
After everyone was ready to go, they all left Arianna's house and headed to Kiara's restaurant for the party. It was only twelve thirty, but Arianna wanted to get there a little early just in case some guests arrived on time.
When they pulled up to the pastry shop, CJ was outside decorating with balloons and a banner that read Happy Sweet 16th Birthday Brianna. When Brianna saw CJ with the decorations, she smiled with glistening, bright blue eyes.
Arianna knew that Brianna had a secret crush on CJ, but she felt that she was too young to be seriously dating, but CJ was allowed to take her out for the occasional movie night. When CJ saw them approaching, he quickly finished with the decorations, and rushed over to wish Brianna a happy birthday.
"Happy birthday, Brie," he said with a shy sort of smile.
Brianna got out the car with a awkward smile on her face and she couldn't quite meet CJ's eyes. "Thanks CJ. Nice decorations," Brianna said shyly. They walked ahead of everyone inside the pastry shop. None of Brianna's friends had started arriving yet so Arianna went to see what else they needed to do before the party started.
Ricky Jones, Arianna's brother, was out in the back patio area cooking away on his large industrial charcoal grill. Ricky was the owner of his own catering business, Jones' Bones, specializing in ribs, chicken, and anything in between. He was wearing a chef's hat and apron that read 'Don't just kiss the chef, PAY the chef'.
"Hey sis, what's poppin? Yall aint ready for these here chicken and ribs," he said with a big grin on his face.
"Hey Rick. Whatever. You always say that. We know you can cook, you aint got to show off," she replied lightheartedly.
They laughed together and chatted about the party and then Arianna went inside to find Brianna.
Brianna and CJ were sitting at one of the tables near the makeshift DJ turntables. Calvin, Kiara's husband had volunteered to act as DJ. Arianna stood quietly watching her family and friends with a feeling of joy and sadness. Making love with Jason again had been wonderful, but she wanted more than just sex. She wanted a real family with him, but she wasn't sure either one of them could leave the past behind and move on to a future together.
Arianna thought of Anthony and how awkward it would be when he arrived. She would be forced to put on a smile and act if she really was happy he was here, sharing this special moment with her and her family, but she was not. Arianna had wanted to call Anthony and uninvited him to the party. But when she had initially invited him, he had sounded so delighted to hear from her and she couldn't help but again feel guilty that she was using him. She knew Anthony cared deeply for her and wished that she could return his feelings. Anthony had been there for Arianna after the breakup with Jason as a loyal and dependable friend. He never judged her and eventually their friendship had blossomed. But she was not in love with Anthony. She told herself that if she gave it time, that maybe she could grow to love him. But since Jason's return, she knew that would never happen. Her heart would always belong to only him.
A little after two the guest started arriving, bringing gifts for the birthday girl. Arianna found herself looking for Jason who still had yet to arrive.
When Anthony arrived, Arianna had to force herself to appear happy. He greeted her warmly with a hug and kisses that left her feeling cold and empty after the kisses she shared with Jason.
About an hour into the party, Arianna saw the sleek black car pull up and stop outside the front of the restaurant. Her heart was pounding in her ears and she was sure that everyone else must hear it too. She watched Jason get out of the car with an ease and grace that almost stopped her heart. He bent down to retrieve several packages out of the back seat before walking around to the passenger side of the car. Had he brought a guest with him, she thought. A date perhaps? He opened the door and a regal looking woman slowly stepped out. She was very petite and had ash blond hair. At first, Arianna thought that she knew the mystery woman, had met her before but she could not recall. They made their way inside and Jason stopped and introduced the woman to various members of Arianna's family.
Jason scanned the room looking for Arianna. He spotted Brianna sitting at a table in the corner with a group of girls and waved. Brianna waved back, said something to the girls, who all looked and him then and laughed, and walked over to join him.
"Hey Dad. Glad you could make it," she said.
Jason handed her a small wrapped parcel. The other larger gifts were placed on the gift table that was setup by the entrance. "I wouldn't miss it. This is for you," he replied.
"Brianna, while you open your gift, I'd like you to meet someone," he said. "This is my mother, Vivian Williams. Mother, this is my daughter, Brianna Jones," he said wistfully.
Vivian smiled warmly. "I know exactly who this young lady is Jason. I would have known her anywhere. She has your eyes," she replied.
Brianna eyed her shyly and replied, "Nice to meet you. You should meet my mom. Mama?" Brianna called. While Brianna was calling for Arianna, she opened the small wrapped box Jason had given her. Inside it were a set of keys. Perplexed, Brianna's eyes flew to Jason's.
"Are these," she began as she held up the keys dangling them between her fingers, "what I think they are?" Brianna asked jumping up and down with excitement.
Jason was beaming. He looked at his watch just as a large flatbed truck was pulling up outside the restaurant. On the back of the truck was a candy apple red BMW convertible. "Yes, if you think they are keys to your brand new car," he said laughingly. "Happy birthday, honey; I know this can't make up for all the ones that I've missed, but I hope it's a start," he finished seriously.
Brianna flung herself into Jason's arms. "Are you kidding!" she exclaimed. "It's perfect!" She gripped Jason in a fierce hug. "You're the best, Dad," she said.
Arianna, who had been chatting with Anthony, but closely watching the exchange between Brianna, Jason, and his mystery guest, excused herself walked over to join them when Brianna called her name.
When Arianna joined the group, she asked, "You called me baby? I hope you're enjoying your party," she said with a false sense of aloofness that she didn't feel. Brianna turned to her and exclaimed, "Mama! Daddy got me a car for my birthday!" She turned and pointed to the red car that was now being lower off the back of the flatbed. "See? Isn't it just the greatest?" Brianna could hardly contain her excitement.
Arianna had kept her eyes away from Jason until now. Quietly she said, "Hello Jason." She was pissed that he would buy such an expensive gift without talking to her about it first. "Jason I wish you would have talked to me first before getting Brianna such an elaborate gift. She doesn't even have her driver's license yet," she finished with a frustrated sigh. Then she remembered that they were not alone and she added, "I'm so glad you could make it, and I see you've brought a guest," she said trying to keep the edge out of her voice.
Jason knew that Arianna would not too happy with the fact that he'd gotten Brianna a car for her birthday. But that was just too bad. She was his only daughter and she was turning sixteen and since he didn't get to spoil her rotten when she was growing he was going to do it now. Jason noticed the edge in her voice but instead of getting angry himself, he merely smiled and nodded. His mystery guest turned to her then and said, "Yes Ms. Jones, it's nice to see you again. You may not remember me, but we have met before," she said.
Arianna looked at the woman again. Up close she could see that the woman was at least fifty or sixty years old. She had a quiet confidence about her that Arianna admired. Suddenly, Arianna remembered where she'd see the woman before. She had visited the shelter before. She had always talked about her loveless marriage and how her husband had alienated their only son. She first came to the shelter about sixteen years ago and had continued to come in at least once or twice a month, up until about two years ago, when her visits lessened to about twice a year. Arianna had often felt sorry for woman, who clearly loved her husband despite his treatment of her and missed her son deeply. But what this lonely woman could have in common with Jason, she thought. And why would he bring her to Brianna's birthday party? Arianna remember her name to be Vivian Forsythe.
As if seeing the questions in her eyes, Mrs. Forsythe said, "My dear, I have a confession to make. I wasn't completely honest with you when we first met long ago. But I feared if you knew the truth, if you knew who I really was, that you wouldn't see me or talk to me anymore."
Arianna was confused. She didn't understand what was happening. Who was this woman to Jason? Then she asked, "Mrs. Forsythe, I'm sorry but I'm confused here. Exactly who are you?"
"My name is Vivian Forsythe-Williams. Jackson Williams is my husband," she said.
Jason's mother. It all made sense now. Vivian had started coming to the shelter shortly after she broke up with Jason. She was different than the usual sort of women that came to the shelter Arianna remembered, but she was always very warm and kind. She always seemed to be interested in Arianna's life and not just there to talk about her own problems. Vivian always wanted to know about her life and how her daughter was doing.
Arianna looked at Jason. His face was a closed mask and she could not tell what he was thinking. She looked at Vivian. She knew that she should feel angry and betrayed, but strangely she did not. In a strange way, it was as if Jason was there in some way, being there for her and seeing Brianna grow up.
When she was finally able to speak Arianna said, "I would not have turned you away. I wish I would have known who you really were when we first met. I want you to know I never would have kept the truth from Jason, if I hadn't thought I was doing the right thing," she finished.
Vivian's eyes grew sad and regretful. "Jackson was wrong for what he did. And I have never forgiven him for driving Jason away. I only hope that one day I can forgive myself for the part I played in keeping the three of you apart," she said sadly.
Jason stood silently watching the exchange with an unreadable expression on his face. Brianna had left them to rejoin her friends and show them all her brand new car. He was about to speak when a man came up to Arianna and put his arm around her possessively. Jason's face hardened. He remembered him as the boy he saw her embracing the day after she ended things with him. What was he to her, he thought? Was he the mysterious fiancé that she mentioned? He could not, would not believe that she no longer cared for him at all. Not after the way they made love last week. Jason knew he was wrong for keeping away from her this past week, but he didn't want to come on too strongly and after the passion they shared he knew he would not be able to keep his hands off of her. Jason envied the intimate way the man held her and the way she smiled up at him. That should be me, he thought. But thanks to Jackson and his poison and lies he could only stand there helpless while another man took his place with his family. A primitive need to stake claim on his woman came over Jason. He'd lost Arianna once but he wasn't about to let it happen again.
"Looks like you also invited a friend to the party," he said to Arianna. Her cheeks flushed and she looked embarrassed and guilty.
"Well Anthony isn't exactly a friend Jason," she replied coyly. "Jason Williams, Anthony James. Anthony James, Jason Williams. Jason is Brianna's father." The two men stared at each other. After several tense moments, Jason extended his hand to Anthony. Anthony looked surprised by her introduction.
"Nice to meet you Anthony," Jason said stiffly.
"Same here," Anthony replied equally as stiff.
Arianna silently wished the floor would open and swallow her up. This is not happening, she thought. Now that Anthony was here she wished she hadn't extended the invitation. She glanced down at her hand and realized she wasn't wearing the engagement ring. At the same time, Jason and Anthony looked at her hand too. She didn't want to hurt Anthony but she knew at that moment that she could not marry him and that they would never be anything other than friends. And the memories of last week, being back in Jason's arms again, affirmed that Anthony could never be nothing more to her than a good friend. Gently she extricated herself from his embrace. He gave her a quizzical look. He looked at her and then at Jason. Then he looked back at her. She knew it was written all over her face. Angrily he walked away. Arianna felt horrible. She did not want to hurt Anthony but she just couldn't give him what he wanted.
Arianna wanted to go to him. But something held her fast. She looked at Jason with a mixture of anger and confusion in her eyes. Jason longed to hold her and take that pain away.
"Go," he said understandingly. "I'll still be here when you get back."
Arianna had a look of relief on her face, but Jason couldn't tell if it was because he told her to go after Anthony, or because he told her he would still be there when she returned.
"Thank you," she said quietly and turned to go find Anthony. Arianna looked for Anthony. She had to talk to him, and hoped that he understood and hopefully they could still be friends. She didn't want him to not be in her life, just not the way that he wanted to be. Arianna found Anthony outside smoking a cigarette. He turned and saw her approaching and his tall back stiffened.
"I get it Arianna. You don't have to explain anything. I thought when you invited me here today that you were finally ready to give us a real try. I see now that I never had a chance. For your sake I hope he doesn't hurt you again. I don't know if I will be around to pick up the pieces this time," he said sadly.
Arianna dropped her head. She sincerely hoped that Anthony could one day find someone who loved him just as much as he loved her. Someone, she thought but not me. She linked her arm through his and said, "I'm sorry Anthony. But I love him. I always have and I probably always will. But just because you love someone doesn't mean that you could or even should be together. Jase and I have a lot to sort out before we can even think about being together. But I hope you and I can still be friends. I love you, just not the way you want me to," she finished regretfully.
Anthony put his arm around her and hugged her. "It's cool. I always knew that there was someone else that had all your heart. I wanted to think it was Brianna but I knew that it wasn't. You never really let me in. I just hope that guy knows how lucky he is. You're one in a million Arianna," he said. He kissed her forehead and walked to his car and left.
Arianna stood there looking at the tail lights of Anthony's car fade away down the street. She wondered if she had done the right thing. She turned to go back in to the party and found Jason standing just outside the door watching her. Her breath caught in a melancholy sigh. How breathtakingly handsome he was standing there in a white polo shirt with faded blue jeans. A strand of golden hair fell across his brow and she long to take her hand and sweep it away. He took the few steps and closed the gap between them and he took her in his arms. He rested his chin on the top of her head. Arianna remembered the first time he held her like this so long ago. They were standing in almost the same exact spot. She wondered if Jason remembered it too. Tears came then, tears that she thought she had stopped shedding. Tears of happiness and sadness, of regret and hope. Hope for a future that seemed bleak and unbearable without Jason.
Jason stepped back and looked down at her when he felt the sobs she was trying to hold back shaking through her. She looked so helpless and vulnerable. An overwhelming wave of protectiveness came over him and he wanted to kill Anthony for hurting her this way. He lifted her face up and gently wiped the tears from her face. She smiled weakly up at him. He dipped his head and placed a light kiss on her lips. She went still at first and then she opened up to the pressure of his lips on hers. His kiss deepened until a need to possess her took over him and he pulled away. They just stood there looking at each other, neither one of them speaking or caring that they had a very captive audience inside watching to see what would happen next.
Arianna's parents and Vivian were all watching the scene taking place outside. Katie thought she had never seen Arianna happier. Vivian hoped that Jason would at last be happy. They all looked at each other with secret smiles. They loved their children and wanted them to be happy and they knew that neither one would be happy without the other. Brianna and CJ were also watching with a secret smile of their own.
As Jason stood there gazing into Arianna's eyes, he knew what he had to do.
"Arianna we can't go on like this," he said. He had to tell her how he felt. He needed her to know how much he loved her and needed her and Brianna in his life. He had waited too long for her already. He reached in his pocket and pulled out the blue velvet box.
Arianna's eyes grew wide in surprise. She looked at the little blue box and she looked back up and Jason with questioning eyes. Jason took her left hand and got down on one knee. Arianna's hand was shaking so badly that he didn't think he would be able to put the ring on her finger. Jason opened the box to reveal the biggest most beautiful diamond Arianna had ever seen.
"I know today is about Brianna, but I can't take it anymore. I love you Arianna, I never stopped loving you, not once in sixteen years. Please marry me. Don't say no again. I don't want to think of the rest of my life without you and Brianna in it. Without you I have no life, please," he pleaded.
Arianna was dumb stricken. She could not find her voice. Fresh tears formed in her eyes. Her heart was over flowing with love for Jason. All she could do was smile brightly and nod her head vigorously. Jason slid the ring on her finger and stood then and grabbed her and lifted her up off the ground. He kissed her again. It wasn't until they heard the loud applause from inside that they were aware that they were being watched. They laughed at being the entertainment for the party and went back inside hand in hand. Everyone offered them their congratulations and joy over their engagement. Brianna too seemed to be glad for the happy couple.