"Five, six, seven, eight!"
"Take a sip from my secret potion / I'll make you fall in love! / For a spell that can't be broken / One drop should be enough!"
The girls had practised the song time and time again, yet that didn't make them any less nervous. In the Netherlands and Germany and all the other countries they had visited they were nervous because it had been their first visit most of the time and of course they wanted to make a good first impression.
And now... now they were about to perform it in front of about fifty thousand people right next to Taylor Swift, one of the biggest and well-known singers in the entire world.
"I'm so excited," Taylor clapped her hands after she had finished the solo she had gotten in order to integrate her into the song. "I love Black Magic and I sure hope it's gonna be a huge success."
"So do we," Perrie laughed and hugged the other blonde. "Thank you so much again for giving us this opportunity."
Taylor smiled at her and nodded and it felt so meaningful to Jade that she felt jealousy ring through for a second before she averted her eyes towards the tiny buffet Taylor's management had offered for them and their crew. She grabbed a cup and poured some water into it, taking a sip without looking at either of them.
"You remember when to come on, right?"
The girls nodded all and went through Taylor's setlist in their heads again to recall how long it would take for them to get on stage. Their makeup and hair would be done by her stylists while she was pulling off the rest of her show.
Jade and Perrie sat next to each, whereas Jade still kind of ignored eye contact – or any contact at all with the blonde. It was just... what if she did something stupid? What if she accidentally leaned over and kissed Perrie? What if she stared at her too long and Perrie became suspicious?
Of course the blonde noticed her wife's lack of response when she stared at her intently, hoping to get just a glimpse of her eyes. But Jade just wouldn't look at her.
Jade could hear Jesy and Leigh-Anne whisper about them and lately they had been watching the two other girls intently, watching Jade and Perrie's every move around each other. They shared meaningful glances as well, but they weren't of the same nature as Perrie and Taylor earlier and it annoyed Jade that she was annoyed by fucking eye contact. Also, why the fuck would she even need to be jealous in the first place because Perrie wasn't gay and she was probably still in love with fucking Zayn and Jade kind of felt like ripping his head off.
"Jade, can we talk before the show starts?" The blonde murmured once they were finished with their hair and makeup. Jade finally looked up into her blue eyes and sighed, feeling plain stupid at her own behaviour.
"Sure," Jade said and put on a forced smile but that moment a member of Taylor's crew ordered them to go out on stage now. They could hear Taylor announce them and Jade was the first to go out onto the stage.
***
"So, Perrie," Taylor said and looked at her with pity in her eyes. "Is it okay if I ask you about Zayn?"
The younger blonde nodded her head and sighed deeply.
"You know, I've been with Harry," the American replied and her voice was filled with pity for the other singer. "When it was over I felt dreadful. I mean, it was not as bad with you, we'd only been going out for a few months really and our relationship was less public than yours, I think. But I know how these guys are. They look so innocent and friendly to the public but... I don't think any of them really care for relationships just yet."
"It's just ridiculous," Perrie sighed and rubbed the skin above her eyes. Jade could hear the slight quiver in her voice that indicated that in a few moments she would start crying. The brunette's heart broke at the sight and she shifted uncomfortably in her spot. She ignored the way Leigh-Anne stared at her.
"It's not," Taylor sighed and reached out, putting her hand on Perrie's thigh.
It's just a friendly gesture, Jade thought but felt her hand clench into a fist. Again she ignored Leigh-Anne although her gaze became more intent every second.
"But I'm sure you'll get over him soon completely," she smiled and looked at Jade, who raised her eyebrows curiously. "I guess it's weird to marry so quickly after a breakup but as far as I can see, you and Jade seem very happy together."
Jade blushed and looked at Perrie and finally their eyes met. The brunette felt her breath hitch in her throat and actually unintentionally she giggled. Almost instantly a smile appeared on Perrie's face and she nodded before looking back at Taylor. "Yeah, Jade is one of the most understanding people on the entire planet," she told her. "I'm really glad I have her in my life."
That was a pretty neutral response, Jade thought relieved. It was nice and something a friend could say as well. Taylor swallowed it as something someone in love would say but Jade knew better because there could never be anything of that sort between the two of them.
She got up so abruptly that the other four women looked at her in confusion and she smiled apologetically. "Sorry, I just really, really need a loo," she laughed and hurried out of the dressing room. She walked down the hall quickly, ignoring the people looking at her. A lot of them had never seen Jade and if it wasn't for the backstage pass hanging around her neck she would probably be thrown out now without Taylor by her side.
She found a door that led outside the building and she felt her lungs being filled with medium-fresh air the moment she stepped outside. They were in Santa Clara and it was a big city so the air wasn't as clean as she remembered from her little home town in South Shields but it was good enough for the moment.
She had closed her eyes and leant against the wall as the door slipped open and almost expecting a crew member to tell her off, she jumped to the side. A mob of long, curly black hair came into the sight and then Leigh-Anne's entire body. She shivered a little at the cool air as she was still wearing her Black Magic costume but that didn't stop her from walking closer to Jade.
"That's not the loo," she laughed and leant on the wall next to the brunette. "So you wanna tell me what's going on?"
"What do you mean?" Jade asked but she knew it was a useless question. She knew that Leigh had been examining her reactions around Perrie recently, she had paid close attention to what Jade did and said. She had probably realised it before she had done it herself. Hell, she didn't even really know what she was doing or feeling herself. All she knew was that she didn't want to feel anything like this towards Perrie.
"This band only works because we all get along so well," she murmured even though Leigh had replied anything at all yet. "I don't want to be the reason everything goes to hell."
"Why would that happen?" Leigh asked with a frown. "We're doing great so far and the four of us still love each other, don't we?"
Jade nodded and sighed, looking at her shoes. They weren't really interesting but Jade pretended in order to avoid looking at her black haired friend. "Don't pretend like you haven't noticed..." She murmured under her breath.
It was silent for a few moments and Jade dreaded whatever Leigh-Anne was about to say. She would probably tell her how irresponsible it was of her to... whatever it was she was feeling. Jade had tried to avoid thinking about it as much as possible because it still felt weird; she couldn't admit it to herself just yet.
"So you don't want to tell me what's going on in your head, then?" Leigh-Anne asked and finally, fucking finally, Jade looked up to meet her friend's eyes and the only response she got was a shake of her head.
***
"Thank you so much for having us," Perrie told Taylor and hugged her tightly. "It was a fantastic night."
"Same goes to, thanks for joining me! I'll hopefully see you soon."
Jesy was about to sit down in the van but looked back at the blonde country singer, "Won't you come to the Teen Choice Awards?"
"I'm afraid not," she replied with a smile and a shrug. "Got my own concert to play at. But I wish you good luck for your performance, I'm sure you're gonna slay it!" The five of them laughed and Taylor watched as they crawled into the van that would drive them to the hotel.
This time they had gone for the van because it would draw less attention to them than the tour bus did, probably, and they were all tired as hell – it was already two in the morning and they had gotten up really early today – so they just wanted to go to the hotel and sleep for the rest of their lives, if possible.
"Hey, Jade," Perrie murmured and turned around. She was sitting in the seat before her wife and her smile was sleepy and cute that it made the brunette's face twist into a silly grin as well. She kind of hated herself for it but she adored Perrie for managing to make her laugh.
"Yah, Pez?"
"Why're you sitting back there when you could've cuddled me here in the front?"
Jade felt her cheeks heat and was thankful that it was so late and dark outside. "Don't you worry, we'll be in our hotel room soon." It felt really strange saying that sentence and she felt herself wishing she was saying it under different circumstances.
The blonde, on the other hand, cheered happily but didn't look forward again, her eyes intently on Jade again. "Is there anything else you wanted to tell me?" Jade asked giggling after a few moments of silent staring.
"Nah, I'm just too lazy to turn back around," Perrie laughed.
"Like I said," Jesy replied with a laugh as well. "A bunch of two year olds." She grabbed Perrie's shoulder and turned the blonde in her seat. "If you stay sitting like this you'll hurt your back."
"I would like to tell you I'm very flexible," Perrie huffed and crossed her hands in front of her chest. "I could have stayed in that position for hours if necessary for the exchange of pleasure."
"Well, thank you for that unnecessary information," Jesy muttered in a Scottish accent and rolled her eyes. "Sleep deprivation makes you exhausting."
Perrie poked her tongue out at Jesy and shook her head. "Jade doesn't think I'm annoying, do you?"
Jade looked at Perrie and then at Jesy before looking back at the blonde where she couldn't help but smile again. "No, I enjoy your company very much. I think it's cute and I know you're going to sleep soon anyway so I don't have a problem enduring you when you're a bit hyper."
"See, she doesn't find me exhausting."
Jesy rolled her eyes and shoved Perrie's shoulder lightly. "That's just because you've got her wrapped around your little finger. But trust me, I won't fall for your innocent and giggly behaviour, Miss Edwards, I will stand strong."
"Keep telling yourself that," Perrie laughed. "One way or another you're all gonna fall under my spell."
"You do realise we're not actual witches?"
Jade and Leigh-Anne giggled at their little bickering for the rest of the car ride and when they finally stopped in front of the hotel, Jade couldn't even tell herself off for the way she enjoyed Perrie's arm around her waist when they both fell asleep.