9 The Deep End
Ryan. She overwhelmed me in every way. Sometimes it was a weight that invigorated me. Other times, it pinned me down and suffocated me. Now she wanted to be all buddy buddy with the other side. I couldn't have her invading every crevice of my life like that. She was begging to pull up skeletons that she just didn't have the stomach for. Meagan knew about my temper and my bad behavior. With her, there was no pressure, nothing to confess and nothing to prove.
I snorted at the thought of Michelle actually babysitting that kid. It wasn't that I was annoyed because she couldn't come. I was annoyed because she was way too buddy buddy with the other side. Between my father's second family and her father's untimely death, Springs had all my secrets at the tip of its tongue like a blabber mouth school girl. She thought the world of me. I just wanted to keep it that way.
"Is your girl coming?" I looked up and Meagan was handing me a drink. "I can't wait to meet her." She sank into the lawn chair. "To see what it is you couldn't find in Springs," she added coyly.
"It's not even like that," I muttered.
"Oh, but it is. Cause we got prettier girls in homeroom so what's really good?"
I glanced at Meagan's solo cup because she was talking a little more reckless than usual. "Like who?"
"Sequoia, Shawnte, Jessica, Marika..."
"Let's narrow it down to the girls that actually like me."
"Uhhh..." She repeated the exact same names.
"Bullshit."
"You wouldn't know cause you don't pay attention, but girls is checking for you. Sequoia said you got a nice body."
"So you would be okay with me talking to one of your friends?"
"At least I would understand it."
"It's not personal..."
"I know."
"So stop taking it personally."
She got up, fixed her shorts and walked away.
Terrell slapped my hand leaving a big bill in my palm. "Bad time?"
"Nah, good time actually."
"Girl problems?"
"Girl problems I didn't even know I had, G." Meagan joined her friends in a huddle.
"Where Rich at?"
"My dad's house."
"I wanna talk business."
"Rich ain't gonna talk to you about his business, bro."
"Just a conversation."
I knew he was getting desperate because Rich would never involve us in his illegal activities and Terrell knew it. I gave Rich a call on his behalf.
"Yo, I was just on my way back to Springs. What's good?"
"Well, Terrell's is in a bad spot with his mom and all," I said easing into it. "We wanted to talk business with you."
"We?"
I ran my hand over my face in annoyance. "I'm not a little kid, Rich. Can we have a conversation or do I need to handle it myself?"
"You need to calm down. We can talk about it tomorrow. I love you, bro."
"Love you back." I hung up and went inside for the start of the fight.
Michelle. I enjoyed the cool water around my feet. Kevin was on the other end of the pool getting his team to sign a football for Lewis's funeral. His smile was missing some of its wattage, but he was still the light of the party.
"Girl, he is so sexy," Shay said staring him down behind her shades. Nadia cosigned. I didn't feel comfortable agreeing or disagreeing so I kept my mouth closed.
"Why haven't you hit that again?"
"Cause she loves Ryan," Nadia teased.
I fidgeted. The football team gathered around as Kevin raised the ball over his head and hollered for everybody's attention. "Hey, listen up!"
He waited for all eyes to shift in his direction before he began his speech. "Lewis would have wanted the party to go on so...let's have a good time." He tried to sound enthusiastic but his voice fell flat. "Make sure you sign the ball before you leave so his family knows how much he meant to us." He squeezed the ball in his hands and chewed his bottom lip. "We're having a memorial during halftime at the homecoming game so make sure show up and show love. This season is for Lewis. Every touchdown, every tackle, every pass...we're doin it for you, Lew. We love you."
Everybody clapped and cheered while he looked to the sky as if he were waiting for the message to reach him. Then he threw the football in the air before jumping in the pool. His teammates followed his lead and jumped in after him.
When he spotted me on the other side of the pool, he dove under the water and swam to our side in record time. He landed right in front of me.
Shay wiggled her fingers. "Hey boo."
He flashed a smile and pinched her playfully.
Then he made eye contact with me. "Your friends are gorgeous."
"Thank you. I'm sure they appreciate it," I said flashing them a smile.
He pulled himself out of the pool and sat beside me. "Thank you...for last night."
Why did that sound so terribly wrong? He tried to lock eyes with me, but I wouldn't let him. He finally gave up and focused on the basketball game going on the other side of the pool.
"You guys wanna play?" he asked hopping back in the water. I started to decline, but he grabbed my hands. "Come on," he said working his charm.
"I can't swim."
"I got you."
We got in deeper and deeper.
"I don't wanna get my hair wet."
"I won't get your hair wet," he said with a laugh.
He dunked under the water and lifted me up over his head. I squealed and wobbled a little bit before I steadied myself on his shoulders. They tossed me the ball. Another girl, stacked on the shoulders of a Davenport All Star smacked the ball out of my hand causing me to lose my balance and fall straight into the blue.
I fell in a million more times but my hair was the last thing on my mind. After the sun went down, we found ourselves in a quiet corner by the poolside people watching. His backyard was made for summer nights. Lounge chairs, pool lights, party music, star speckled skies...
He seemed to be drifting off to a sad place so I tried to talk him back to life. I pushed him playfully before pulling my hair into a ponytail. "You see why I didn't wanna get my hair wet?"
"You're in a bathing suit. Nobody's looking at your hair," he muttered. I could feel him drifting to a sad place. He gulped down his grief like cough medicine. "They want me to speak for the team at the funeral on Friday..."
"You can only do what you can do, Kevin. It's not about what everybody wants from you right now."
He looked at me like he wanted to say something.
"What?"
"I can't believe you're dating that kid."
"Dating is a strong word for what we're doing right now."
He leaned forward, elbows on his knees.
I said, "Ryan killed my father." I tisked when tears suddenly coated my eyes. "Ryan...killed my father. Can you believe that?"
He took my hand but when I heard Nadia clear her throat, I quickly let go. She curled her lips with suspicion.
"Are we leaving?"
Kevin rose to his full statuesque six feet. "I can take you home if you want."
"No thank you. We gotta be on our way," Nadia sang.
"I'll call you."
"Yeah."
He gave me a kiss that barely missed my lips. I turned and hurried to the car where Shay and Nadia waited patiently. Their silence was filled with disapproval.
I was tired of the dirty looks through the rearview. "He killed my fucking dad," I said, sucking back tears. Suddenly, I couldn't hold back and started sobbing uncontrollably.
Nadia turned to look at me. "That explains a lot."
I watched the yellow lines fly by as we sped through the suburban Davenport hills and passed out in the backseat.
They shook me out of my drunken slumber and we made it around Meagan Benison's house to her stone pool and grotto. It was Springs wild; guys doing back flips and somersaults into the water, girls squealing trying to get away the perv lurking on their bikini strings, and upbeat music played as a soundtrack to the madness. I zoned in on Ryan Pierce. He stood by the pool lending all his time to the thick thighed snicker from RJs. She was built solid like her two story contemporary home. Looking at her made me feel like a noodle in a swimsuit. I shrank back into the wall.
Juan strutted like a cholo in his dark shades, high socks and two plastic cups in hand. I couldn't see his eyes behind his dark shades but I knew he was two drinks past blitzed. Nadia laughed as he walked over and placed one arm her and the other around me, seemingly leaning on us for physical support.
Nadia held his cheeks. "How much did you have to drink?"
"I'm just a little tipsy, boo. Don't worry about it."
I let them have their moment while I watched Ryan lift the snicker bar off her feet and catapult her in the pool. While he teetered on the edge, another girl gave him the push he needed to jump right in. I helped myself to one of Juan's cups.
Nadia ran off to get answers. Truthfully, I had all the answers I needed. I frowned at the taste of Juan's punch. "Juan, that's disgusting."
"Just drink it, nerd."
"You better slow down before you say something stupid," I muttered while his girlfriend was away.
I took another sip of that acidic trash he was drinking. One cup of that shit had me buzzed and sweating like a pig. I found a corner of the pool and slipped in up to my ears. At first I could hear everything going on. A couple talking dirty to each other, a girl humming to the music, cursing and arguing over who won a fight in the tenth grade...
I closed my eyes and my senses dimmed. It was the same kind of peace I got when I ran. My shoulders and legs relaxed until I floated to the surface. All I could hear was water moving around me, holding me up.
I felt my bikini loosen around my breasts and my nipples tighten. I spotted my top floating away and tuned in to all the laughter around me. I gasped as I went under, struggling with the water for what felt like ten minutes before I felt him lift me up. I coughed out the water in my lungs and rubbed it out of my eyes. "Where's my top?" I choked.
"I got it."
"Where is it?"
"Right here."
My bare breasts were pressed against his bare chest as I quickly slipped my swimming top on. I pushed him away while he clung to civility. I pushed him again just so he understood that until he gave me answers, I would give him war.