Chapter 4~
That morning when Bella woke me up at six thirty, I was cranky. When she started peppering me with questions about Draco, I was mad. When she wouldn't leave me in peace for five minutes to go to the bathroom and brush my teeth, I was angry. So all together, I'm not having a good day so far. Not to mention my first class was DADA with Snape. If he assigns homework, I swear I would stick a poisoned needle in his chair.
I was so tiered I could barely eat my breakfast, which made me even angrier because after breakfast was finished, my stomach started growling.
At least I had a free period first which Bella was filling with Arithmacy Class.
I slowly made my way to the owlrey. The cool September air was chilly against my face. I had decided not to wear my robes today and I was wearing khaki pants with a white shirt and a red and gold tie. Pretty much what the boys wore, but I don't give a crap.
Once I got to the owlrey, I choose a big, brown barn owl. I attached the scroll of parchment to the owl's leg and watched as it flew away to deliver my letter.
As I made my way back down the stairs and back the castle, I heard a rustling in the grass. I narrowed my eyes walked towards the tall brown grass.
This is when a murderer jumps out right? I had read a few of Bella's muggle books and most of the people had died from looking in tall brown grass. How ironic.
Remind me to tell Bella not to let me read any more of her books. I believe I'm beginning to be creeped out by them.
As I get closer to the grass I pull out my wand, ready to hex and/or kill anything that comes out of the grass.
I felt someone wrap their arms around me from behind. I let out a high pitched scream before a hand covered my mouth. I tried twisting in the person's arms to get a look at my captor, but I swear the person had a death grip on me. I resorted to a second idea, hoping the captor was a guy. I bent my knee so that my foot hit the person in between the legs. I was happy to hear the grunt of a guy and he loosened his arms just enough to spin around in his arms. One thing he forgot to do was take my wand.
I pressed it against his throat and was surprised to see the guy was...Draco?
"Omigosh!" I said. I felt my arm drop to my side. "What the hell is your problem!?"
"I'm sorry, I didn't think you'd do that!" He exclaimed. I blushed when I realized the position we were in. For a moment we just stood there, looking at each other.
His grey-blue eyes staring into my green ones. Then I realized he was leaning in. To kiss me! Omigod! Draco freaking Malfoy was going to kiss me!
A clearing of a throat sends me flying trough the air.
"Excuse me?" Ron asked. I looked at my brother in disbelief. Really, dude? "What the hell are you doing with my sister!" He pushed Draco up against the nearest wall and drew back his arm. I realized Ron was going to punch him! And Draco was just standing there like an idiot. He wasn't even fighting back.
"No, Ron! Stop it!" I said, lunging forward and grabbing hold of his arm.
"Let go, Aly!" he snapped.
"No!" I cried. "Not until you let him free. Don't punch him. He didn't do anything! It was me! I swear it was me!" I pulling on his arm like crazy. "I swear that I won't go near him again! Just don't, Ron! Don't!" I said loudly.
Ron let to of Draco and grabbed onto my arm, sending on last glare at Draco before dragging me away from him. Stupid overprotective brother.
"What's your problem?" he asked, pulling me towards the entrance to the castle. "You're so naïve, Aly! All you want is a boyfriend, and you don't care who. Even if the guy is a Slytherin dick who happens to be your brother's biggest enemy! Not to mention one of your friends biggest enemies. I really didn't think you'd stoop that low!" I listened to his ramble with tears in my eyes. Could this day seriously get any worse?
"It's not his fault-"
"I don't want you turn into some...some desperate little slut!" he snapped. "You'd stay away from him if you knew what was good for you."
"But I-"
"No buts, Aly!" he snapped. "I'm sure Fred an George would be happy with you dating him. I'm sure mum and dad would be so proud of their daughter who was dating a possible Death Eater!" We getting a few weird glances in the hallway from the students on free period.
"He's not a Death Eater!" I snapped, finally getting a word in. "And I'm sure Fred and George and mum and dad would proud if I was with someone I actually liked!" I felt tears streaming down my face. Ron turned to look at me, his grip still on my arm.
"You actually like him?" he asked. I snorted.
"Why else do you think I would defend him!?" I cried. "Because I feel sorry for him? No. I really do like him, Ron!"
"You disgust me," he said, dropping my hand. "I really never did think you would stoop this low. You're as good as Percy to me now. Go on, Draco's little doll, like him all you want, but when he hurts you because he has no feelings towards you whatsoever, don't come crying to me." I watched him storm off, with tears still falling down my face.
The day did just get worse.
I spend the rest of the day moping and when Wednesday came, I spent that day moping as well. I skipped out on Draco. By the end of the week I was thinking about jumping of the Astronomy Tower.
On Saturday night at about ten I made my way up the stairs and stood at the railing. It was long way down. A fall that would surely end with death. Maybe it would be better if I just cursed myself. I slid myself over the railing and stood on the little ledge, looking down. The stone felt cold on my bare feet.
I looked out over the trees and the lake. I took one last breath before I jumped. Right off the edge.
You know that feeling in your stomach you get when you go skydiving, or when you go down a tall drop on a roller coaster. That's what I was feeling now as I fell to the ground. Everything seemed to be happening in slow motion and I knew I only had a few seconds to live. I closed my eyes, waiting for the impact that never came.
Wait...it never came?
I opened my eyes and realized that I was suspended a few feet above the green ground that would have taken my life. I slowly felt myself being lifted upward until my face was on the cold tile floor. I laid there for a minute.
"You know, that was pretty stupid," he said. Draco....
"You wouldn't have done any better!" I snapped, scrambling to my feet.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Why should I tell you?" I asked. He narrows his eyes at me.
"Because we're friends," he said. "It's not my fault you skipped on me. I sat there waiting for hours!"
"Well, Malfoy, you should know that I would never want to be friends with you!" I said. It hurt everything inside me as I said those words. Fifteen words.
"It didn't sound like that when you asked if we could be friends!" he exclaimed. I could tell he was angry and it was taking everything I had to keep being angry at him.
"You agreed!" I yelled. "That was the stupidest mistake of my life!"
"I'm sure it was," he said. He started walking towards me, backing me into a wall. Hey, wall. I'll call you Ben. Walls were so much easier to get along with then people. I had a thing for walls. I rubbed my hand on the wall.
"It was," I said softly. He put his hands on my cheeks and it was taking everything I had not to respond. He moved one hand to the small of my back pulling me closer to him, so that our bodies were pressed together. I could feel the heat rushing to my cheeks.
"Tell me," he said huskily into my ear, "that this doesn't make you feel good."
"It...it..." I paused, at a lose for words. It did feel good. It felt right.
"Tell me, that you don't want anything to happen between us," he whispered. His whisper make me shiver.
"I can't," I said finally. I really liked him. I really did. I saw him smile.
"I like you, too," he said.
"I...I said that out loud?" I asked. He nodded and I felt my cheeks reddening.
"You don't need to be embarrassed," he said. His thumb was caressing my cheek.
"Yes I do," I said, with a slight sigh. "I'm not supposed to talk to you. If I knew what was good for me, I would leave right now."
"That would be if this were bad for you," he said. "Attraction is good. Healthy even." He leaned down and pressed his lips onto mine. It was a slow kiss that lasted five seconds. I counted. But even in that short amount of time, I'm sure I felt sparks.
"Why?" I asked him. "Why do you like me?"
"You're beautiful,"he said. "Loving, caring, kind."
"How would you know?" I asked.
"I watched you get sorted and I was wishing with all my might that you would be in Slytherin. But when I heard oh were a Weasley and you were sorted into Gryffindor, I was devastated. I watched you during that Christmas dance in your third year. You went with Finnigan and I was wishing that that was me dancing with you. I watched you all year last year, but you didn't seem to take notice to me until this year. Why is that? Why did you notice me, Aly?"
"Because of how kind you were," I replied. "I had heard so many stories about you, and when I arrived at that prefect carriage, and you were nice to me, it didn't make any sense. And...I have noticed you before," I said shyly.
"When?"
"I had-erm-I huge crush on you in my first year," I admitted.
"Really?" he asked. I could see him smirking. I nodded my head and pulled away from him. I walked over to the railing.
"I swear if you jump again, I'll jump after you!" Draco warned.
"I won't," I giggled, then my face turned serious. "I shouldn't be here, Draco."
Ron already cast you out, I thought. What else do I have to lose? The rest of my family. My friends.
"Are you really that nervous about it?" he asked. "There's nothing to worry about."
No guy is worth losing friends over.
"What about you though?" I asked. "What will people think when they find out that you're dating a Gryffindor fifth year?"
"I don't care," he replied.
"I don't believe that."
"I'll deal with it," he said. "Come on, Aly, be my girlfriend?"
"I...I can't, I'm sorry," I said, rushing towards the stairs. He grabbed hold of my arm.
"Is there anyway I can prove that I won't hurt you?" he asked. I took a deep breath and pulled out of his grip. I ran down the stairs and ran and ran and ran until I didn't know where I was. I leaned against the nearest wall and slid to the ground.
I did it, I thought. I controlled myself around Draco Malfoy. I did it. Now Ron'll know that I care more about my family and friends. I did it.
There was nothing I had to worry about now.
Except my heart....
My heart hurt right now.
Like a burning sensation.
Like it was breaking in half.
I sat there leaning against the wall for what seemed like forever. I wondered why Fred and George haven't written me back yet. Why had Harry been ignoring me? Had Ron told him? Why did I try to kill myself? Why did he save me? Why did I deny him? For my family! I did it for my family!
I felt at war with myself.
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That next morning I dressed in grey skinny jeans and a grey sweatshirt. Then I put on a pair of black boots. After putting tons of black eyeliner and mascara on I made my way down the stairs to the Great Hall. I hadn't been in the Great Hall for awhile. I has always told Bella to bring something for me to eat. I had been skipping classes, too. When did I turn into such a rebel? Last Tuesday. Thanks to Draco Malfoy and my big brother.
I paused before walking into the Great Hall. I walked straight over to Harry, Hermione, Ron, Ginny, Bella, and Damon. Bella's eyes widened when she saw me.
"My lord, Aly, you look like hell!" she exclaimed.
"Thanks," I murmured.
"What, are you going goth or something? You're scaring me with all the dark colors. Are you okay?" Ginny asked me. I shook my head no.
"Where've you been lately?" Ron asked. I looked up at him. He was talking to me.
"Crying," I replied.
"Why?" Hermione asked.
"I don't want to talk about it," I replied.
"Why is Malfoy staring at you?" Ginny asked. I turned and saw that he was staring at me. When he saw me looking he turned away. He looked concerned. I'm not sure if it was for me or for something else, but I'm pretty sure it was because of me. I looked at Ron and he looked at me.
"I have no idea," I said softly. He gave me an approving look. I picked up and apple and took a bite of it. Looking back around, I noticed Draco was eating an apple as well. I put my apple down.
Just then the owls came in and a big black and white owl soared and landed in front of me. I untied a small package and letter from its leg and have it a drink from my goblet. I wasn't going to take a drink anyways.
I was happy when I saw it was in Fred's handwriting.
"What's that?" Ron asked.
"It's from Fred, though I'm sure George had some input," I replied.
Just then another owl came and landing in front of me. It dropped a letter in my lap and flew away before I could question anything. The letter was not in a writing I was familiar with.
"What's that," Ginny asked.
"No idea," I shrugged and tucked the letters and package in my bag I had with me.
"The teachers are mad you've been skipping classes," Ginny said. I turned to ask Bella if this was true but quickly turned away. No one, and I repeat, no one, wanted to see their best friend in the middle of a make out session.
"If I were you, I'd prepare to get some house points taken," she continued.
"I don't care," I said. I was suddenly feeling miserable again and I wished I could go home.
"You should," Hermione said. "It's your O.W.L. year."
"O.W.L.s are overrated," I replied.
"Why are you being so bitchy?" Ginny asked.
"I'm just not in a good mood," I said flatly. And that was true. Everything was more then perfect for everyone else while my life was a living hell. I knew that was wrong of course. I could tell Harry was having a hard time, and it was far from true that Ginny and Dean were going smoothly. They were always fighting nowadays and I knew it got to her. She would come into the Common Room crying and without saying a word, disappear into her room without a word for the rest of the night.
I guess I was being a little selfish.
"You really need to suck it up," Ginny said. "This year's tests determine what you can be when you grow up and unless you want to stay at home all day every day, I suggest you at least try."
"There's nothing wrong with staying home," I said. "Mum does."
"That doesn't sound like you at all," Ron said. "I remember a little girl who wanted to be a famous Quidditch player. But you never tried out for the team. I remember a girl who always dreamed of working at the Ministry. You're not going to do anything if you don't try."
"I'm the team captain this year," Harry stated. "I can't guarantee you a spot, but I'd love to see you try out."
"I'm trying out this year," Ginny said, "for Chaser."
"I...I guess I can try out for Chaser as well," I said. "I always practiced being a Seeker, but, Harry, unless you suffer a painful injury, I doubt I'll be one."
"That's true," Hermione said. "Harry is the best Seeker since his father."
"Don't pretend you know about Quidditch, 'Mione," I said, actually laughing.
"I'm not, just repeating what everyone else says," she replied. Everyone laughed and I actually laughed with them.
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Picture of Damon to the side->