~Chapter Sixteen~
I was adamant not to go. I'd made every intention of avoiding the table and everyone else for the entirety of the morning, but I ran into Duke. And with a careful pout here and honest, practical words here and there, the girl I'd been raised to be reared its head in acknowledgement.
Giving up would hurt my dad and it would cause a rift between what could be a great family.
I was being controlled with emotion that stemmed from mediocre assumptions.
I was giving everyone else a hard time.
Jonny still needed a mother figure, and growing among many figures would help him establish a firmer solution for himself.
And then, the one that Elliot had unwittingly let loose scoffed at it all. But, before I knew it, I was seated in the dining room, Jonny across from me, and breakfast went on as if nothing had happened before.
Ella returned to her chirping, albeit more calmer; dad didn't speak much except answers peeked over his newspaper, Duke teased Timmy, and Jonny and I remained silent. It was like I'd never said a word. It was, simply put, ignoring the elephant in the room.
That emotion reared its head again. I slowly got up. "Jonny, if you're done, I'll wait for you at the car," I said. Jonny nodded.
No one spoke as I made to leave, grabbing my bag from the chair I'd dropped it on. Suddenly, Ella spoke. "Don't forget Timmy," she said.
I glanced back, tight smile in place. "Muriel can take him," I said.
Duke sighed, closing his eyes briefly. Dad's brows furrowed curiously. "How are you two getting to school?"
"It's about time I used that car, anyway," I said, thinking to the car grandmother, although tight on tradition and its restrictions, had sent me off with.
Jonny got up and grabbed his bag as people watched. I went into the kitchen, took the lunch and was back with barley a word uttered. As I was at the dining room arch, dad broke into the silence.
"Chrystal, if this about–"
It was the stare I gave him that made him stop. "Now we address the issue in the air," I said, more gaily than I hoped. I was acting a brat, I knew that, but I couldn't stop it. They'd ignored everything. "I thought we were all going to play cough and care not for one's sentiments. I'm afraid it's going to take some time until I can fathom the thought of sitting down to have a chat; but until then, I'm afraid this is good day."
The car roving under me made me pause. Grandmother's stubborn mind had made her quite a challenge when picking out a car. The Aston Martin beneath me purred beautifully, chic and right in its radiant yellow.
Jonny sighed. "You know,"
I sighed. "I know," I said, glancing at him. I smiled sadly, ruffling his hair. A cheeky smile pulled at his lips as he ducked away. "I know, little dragon."
"It's been a while since you used that name," he said, blushing furiously against the chiding tone of his voice.
I grinned as I pulled out of the garage front. Muriel had a worried expression as he watched us ride off and I knew it stemmed from my first driving lesson. That had been fun.
Thoughts drifted through my mind on the way to school, but surprisingly, control had returned, together with its coordination and response timing. We arrived at school without much of a problem but with a silent car. A heavy weight settled in my chest and I couldn't wait to see Elliot.
He'd know what to do. He had to know what to do.
But I couldn't find him. Friends commented on the car and I remember answering it was a gift. It did stand out in the school parking lot. Although filled with equal measures expensive and humbled cars, the yellow colour did stand out. It was better than the Barbie pink my mother had in stores for my eighteenth birthday.
It was a few weeks to that day, and the family lawyer had strict instructions to buy the latest model of my choice. I preferred to save that money into something else now that I had a car, as I know she'd have liked, and I'd instructed the lawyer to place the money in Jonny's trust fund. Unfortunately, the lawyer was under strict orders.
Finally, when I thought I'd spend the weekend without so much as a glance of him, without a way to rid this emotion from my chest, I found him on my way out of sixth class, out of seven periods.
He was leaning his forehead against his locker, and relief coursed out of me at the sight of him. I didn't see his eyes, closed behind his lids, and didn't notice a paper crunched in his hands. The relief of seeing him, finally knowing that things would be alright, coursed through me and I quickly excused myself from my friends. Giggles followed me, but I ignored them.
As I got closer, Elliot suddenly stood upright and began walking away. I made to hurry up, and just as he passed a door, I grabbed his hand and pulled us into the empty classroom. Thankfully, it was unoccupied.
Elliot was a dishevelled mess; I failed to notice, already falling into a relieved speech as the door behind me closed. "I've been searching for you," I started. "God, you have no idea what happened. My family–"
Elliot shook his head. "I don't really care about your crappy stories right now, okay? And I seriously don't give a damn about you family. I've got to go."
And with those angry words, Elliot brushed by me and jumped into the fray of lesson break. I stared at the spot he'd just vacated. I continued to stare at the place he'd just deadpanned a major part of a beating heart. Breathing became laboured. My nerves shook with a vengeance. Something clouded my eyes.
When it hit me, I got angry. I stomped out of the room, determination in every stride. I nearly paused as I found Elliot coming back, a look of realisation across his face. I brushed by him.
Kudos for Elliot he didn't attempt at talking to me in class. I feared what I could have done on that moment, with the whole class and a teacher known for her strict rules. It was at that moment regret crushed on me.
I should have handled things better. How could I have let go? Control is the point of every success, especially with the discipline. I blamed my father for letting go of my mother and yet, every time I denied that which had to come to me. How could I stand my ground when I'd let go of such practical and more suitable positions, all for a pair of big googly eyes?
But Elliot didn't stay back, and as I waited for Jonny at the parking lot, bag already in the car, he found me. I clenched my jaw, turning away from his approach. I didn't want this. I didn't want to act the fool before him, bawling my eyes out. I shouldn't be angry at him as he'd done me a favour with the bucket of ice he'd let fall over me.
"Chrystal," he said, standing beside me.
I didn't turn to face him but I certainly didn't ignore him. "Don't worry," I said; "We are through."
Elliot's huff was one of amusement. "I didn't know there was something," he said.
That hurt more than it should have. But wasn't that the truth: we were never an item, just an agreement. "Of course," I smirked, turning to face him. Finally, I saw Jonny: only he stood with Chris up the main building steps. How else would he have caught up to me? "Of course, we never really were. How could I forget the situation in its entirety? What I should be saying is the deal is over. You wish to fail your assignments, Dupree, that's on you," he made to talk. "I don't care what you have to say, and I certainly never should have."
He stared back as I stared him down. I should have remained practical and in control. I should have predicted this with all that I knew, and left myself in a situation where my reaction was practiced and full of ease and calm. I should never have come to Canada.
Blue eyes stared back, never pleading, never demanding. It was a calm, icy glacier. It hurt more than he could have ever imagined.
A whistle shuttered the stare down. I was the one to turn. I found Mongo standing a few feet from us, grinning cheekily. White teeth flashed in the sunny autumn day. I shivered. How had he gotten in here?
"Trouble in paradise?" he said, once again flashing an astonishing smile.
But that wasn't what startled me. Mongo was dressed in a uniform of black pants and a mint green shirt. He had the long sleeves rolled up, exposing a scar over his left arm, and had his blazer hanging over a side bag swinging down his side. It wasn't even this, and his obvious untidiness from the tie carelessly draped around his shoulders, that had startled me. Obviously Mongo had parents, and he had a brain that needed the knowledge of a school: a private school; St. Benedict.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" Elliot scowled, moving to stand before me.
Out of the eye full before me, my gaze landed on the red, worn beanie on his head, with blonde hair peeking from beneath it. It was the light glinting off golden thread that was so worn out, it barely hang on to the red beanie; a beanie, if I remember correctly, had been quickly pulled together in the haste to have a friend remember, and then, after all this was done, I'd pulled together a needle and thread on the way to the airport to say goodbye, and sewn in hurriedly the name 'toad' as's' of 'snoad' had been too difficult to stitch.
I'd made that. I'd given a boy that beanie. And now, as I remember all the looks my father had given me, I remembered exactly whom I had the pleasure to re-friend.
Mongo grinned. But that wasn't his name. "Now, you remember it," he drawled.
Elliot turned a curious glance my way, but it stayed. I couldn't help it. Eyes wide, I inspected the boy before me with fervour. Oh, how hadn't I noticed it?
At my mother's wake, while seated with Jonny, I'd been watching the people around me converse, and it had been more saddening that the spark of light leaving the earth. Everyone had been so engrossed with condolences and tears; they had failed to remember mother was always happy, always laughing about one thing and onto another.
That was also the first time I ever saw grandmother crying. It was saddening. I'd pulled Jonny out of there, because he needed a different atmosphere; he needed to remain a child.
Outside, that's where we'd met a boy my age. He'd been searching for something in the bushes, and, needing distractions, we'd decided to see if there was a problem. He'd had the brightest and cheekiest smiles, with murky green eyes that were constantly full of mischief. I'd given him a red beanie he'd promised to always wear.
The same cheeky boy who'd had us all laughing out loud and attracting the adults outside stood before me, and nothing, not even Elliot's tightening stance, could stop me from doing what I did next. Joy filled me and I forgot what had happened since, and before I knew it, I ran straight past Elliot and hugged him.
"Morgan!" I laughed, feeling the world tilt around as he swung me around, laughing along. But out of enthusiasm, I pulled back and eyed him up to down. "Look at you, you've grown. Ah, but you still have the cheeky smile."
"About time, toad killer," he said. I blushed, but laughed, smacking his arm.
"I did not kill Casper," I said, but he just grinned. "He died the next day, so I didn't kill him." He'd been the one to pull out laughter from Jonny and I that day, all because he'd brought his toad to the party, when he'd been told not to. We'd been laughing at the pond trying to catch something that kept on slipping away.
His eyes flashed that twinkle I'd missed so much. "Ah, but I remember you stomping about the bush like a giant. I bet that gave his little heart the reason for his sudden death."
I giggled. Casper had been way beyond his age, and he knew it. I stared up at this boy, this boy who'd disappeared on me. On remembering this, I remembered a promise made to me on the rush of goodbyes as his plane had been leaving. I pinched him.
"Hey!" he jumped away, and I realise he'd had his arm around my waist. "What was that for?"
I shrugged, smiling. "You," I pointed at him, "forgot something."
His brows nearly furrowed, but then, another grin flashed an unabashed smile. "Ah, yes, that," he laughed. He suddenly reached into his bag, and with that I realised he hadn't. Morgan pulled out a packet of Swiss chocolate, halfway done, and cheekily, he gave them to me. I blushed, laughing. "Yeah, so, I might have kept that promise too well."
I took the packet, still laughing. "Yeah, I can see the brunt of it," I said. "Man, you need to lose some weight."
He mock scowled, but broke out into a grin, and then we were both laughing again.
"Are we missing something here?" this was Chris' voice, sounding equal parts surprised and frustrated. "And wait: if you two know each other, then why the fuck did you... oh, you shit-bag."
Curious, I stared from Chris, who'd arrived with Jonny, and returned that stare past Elliot and to Morgan. But, instead, Morgan laughed. I smiled, feeling left on a loop. "I don't understand," I said. Suddenly, what had happened dawned on me.
Elliot was a face of trouble as I turned to stare at him for answers. "He played the whole photograph thing just to get you downtown," he said. Suddenly, his expression cleared: it was the look of betrayal erupting fury. I'd felt that sometime this week.
I shook my head. "I had to see her, alright," Morgan said innocently as I stared up at him. "Chris' description was pretty good: blonde hair, blue eyes and a nice beauty spot on her neck. And to have the same name as you, I had to see for myself. I have to admit, the trick you did under his nose; priceless."
"How'd you like to see the trick I'd do under your nose," Chris threatened, taking a threatening step forward. Alarm flashed within me and I unknowingly stepped before Morgan.
Elliot's eyes shot up in surprise, and he scowled. "Chris," he said. Chris' jaw ticked, and it was the first time I'd seen the usually happy-go-lucky guy this angry.
Chris stepped back, and Morgan stepped forward. He shook his head, amusement clearly the dominant feature. I shook off Elliot's stare. "Stop that, Morgan," I said instead. He put his arms up, shrugging his shoulder. "So, why did you guys really want me to stay away from him? It's not like he'd harm anything."
Morgan feigned feeling wounded but then shook his head. "Another time, but now," his gaze trailed behind me. "Jonathan, the squealing girl, remember me?" he said, and I let him pass. There was no way Morgan would hurt Jonny. I was certain of that conviction.
Jonny grinned, before readjusting his glasses. "The last time we met I was forced to acquire a new pair of glasses;" he said.
Morgan laughed. "Yeah, yeah, so I admit the trick went a little too far," he said. "But it was pretty fun hearing you scream."
Jonathan's cheeks blushed, but then he laughed. "And now I dissect frogs," he said. "Have any lying around?"
Morgan laughed, and I laughed as well. "Oh, I missed you guys," he said.
Suddenly, I became aware of Elliot and Chris being nowhere in sight. Too caught up with catching up with Morgan, I hadn't notice them slip away. I found him walking back up the parking lot. Duke, who was coming towards us, was going to intersect with him. Elliot grabbed his arm as they passed, and he whispered something, staring their way; his gaze barely flicked over me but I was certain which direction the icy glare was pointed at.
"Ah, never will trust me, that one," Morgan said behind me. We watched as Duke nodded firmly and then moved towards us, a scowl marring his face. "And here comes another one who won't. Then again, it's understandable."
I glanced up at the sound of a tease and found him staring down at me, the most serious I've seen so far. "What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, turning to stare at him.
Morgan did an over exaggeration of a gaping, wide-eyed expression. "L-look at you," he waved up and down, making me laugh out loud. "You're a total babe."
I laughed, though I blushed. "Why; thank you," I said, fluffing at loose hair. "I brush it with twenty strokes each night, you know, and bath in honey and milk. You don't get looking like this without a little something extra, y'know."
Morgan made approving sounds on the back of his throat as I twirled around. Jonny was laughing beside us, clapping his hands and calling out things like 'encore' and 'bravo' in support. We all laughed at the display, and I watched as my friends stared at us with inquisitive glances.
Duke joined us. "Who's the friend?" he asked, staring at me for an answer. I sighed.
"Duke, this is Morgan Snoad," I said, watching the way both boys eyed each other. I sighed. "And before you guys start circling each other like vultures," Jonny laughed, Morgan shrugged, "Morgan, this is Duke, my step brother."
Duke's jaw muscle clenched. "I'm being told not to allow you to leave with her," Duke said, to the point, and it surprised us all, including Morgan. "When are you leaving?"
I shook my head but couldn't help the bubble of laughter. "Don't worry," I said, shoving both boys back as I got in the middle. "Jonny and I are leaving now."
Morgan showed mock remorse as I tried to say good bye and we ended up parting thirty minutes later. Duke hitched a ride with us, and remained rather passive on our way back.
I glanced back at him through the rear view mirror, but then turned back to concentrate on the road. "Something's on your mind," I said.
Duke glanced at me, and I barely caught his gaze. He shrugged. "I don't like those guys you hung out with," he said.
I nearly rolled my eyes, but then the light turned red. I had thirty or more seconds. "I don't care, Duke," I said, staring back at him.
Duke's smirk was cold. "Of course," he said. "No problem with Chris, definitely don't care what shit that Mongo guy's pulled, and certainly feels damn right sleeping with Elliot. I don't like him the most."
My grip tightened on the steering wheel just a notch, but then I breathed, and the deeper I breathed, the calmer I felt. Duke didn't say much after that; and I pulled the car on road as the light turned green. We rode out of town for about twenty more minutes, and then found ourselves at home.
As the gate was opening, I turned back to Duke. "I have no problem with Chris; he's my friend. I don't care what Mongo's done; it's his life. And if I'm sleeping with Elliot, it's certainly not your damn problem," I breathed, and then smiled. "Wow; cursing feels good."
Jonny's smile was odd as he tried to suppress it. "By the way, duke," he said, turning back. "She didn't say a word when you were caught with the teacher."
Duke grumbled all the way to the house.
"Good evening, Ms. Jenkins," the garage attendant said, Muriel right beside him. "I trust the car ran well."
I grinned, pulling out of the car after shutting it off. "It run superbly, Pete," I said. "And you shouldn't worry so much. I didn't graze anything."
Muriel smirked as I walked up to the house. Stepping into it reminded me of the not so good moments of the past two days.
Ladies and Gentlemen, she, the writer, is back. Please give a rousing something for her return! and the crowd goes wild *wah *wah... Thank you! *pad away tear. Thank you, all of you, so much for *sniffs being such patient readers.
Anywho: my charger is new, the laptop is ready for midnight key tapping up until the first yawn. It's good to be looking at a screen again, and not a book of dry-mouth paper.