I got a call from Jake around nine o'clock the next morning.
My lips tugged into a smile as I read his name on the screen of my phone.
"Hi," I said.
"Hey, I just got your text. Do you still want to hang out?"
"Sure, why wouldn't I?"
"You sent it pretty late last night and I thought maybe you'd be too tired...," he said.
"No, not at all," I said almost too soon, my lips pulling up in an excited grin.
"Good, I'm glad."
I smiled, "When are you picking me up?"
"Depends. Where would you like to go?"
"I don't know," I said, shrugging.
"I think I have an idea. I'll pick you up around four thirty, sound good?"
"Yeah, I'll see you then."
We hung up and I sighed as I fell against my couch. I had no plans for the rest of the day. Jake had left me some school related work to do, but I was definitely not in the mood for that.
And so the hours ticked by slowly as I ran boring errands around the apartment, walked the dog, surfed the internet, and ate food. I ate a lot of food.
At three, I decided it was time to get ready.
I strode over to my stereo system and pressed play.
Music sounded from the speakers installed in the corners of my apartment, and I bobbed my head along with the beat as I fixed my hair and picked out the clothes I would wear. I didn't know what we'd be doing but I opted for something casual yet hopefully acceptable for whatever Jake had planned.
Then I called Tom.
"Guess what?" I grinned.
"Uh, you finally named your dog?"
"No, something even better," I said.
"What is it?"
I took a deep breath, "Jake is taking me out on a date."
"What?!"
I laughed. "Should I take that as an insult?"
"No, but...What about Devin?"
I frowned. "What about him?"
"Are you finally over him?"
"I guess I am."
"All right, good. Just...be careful, okay?"
I frowned, again, "What do you mean?"
"It's just...never mind. Have fun, we'll talk about this later. Oh, and before I forget. Please tell Devin that we broke up."
My frown turned into a smile and I said, "I'll tell Devin the next time we talk. I promise."
"Good, enjoy your date," he said.
"Thanks."
I spritzed on a little bit of cologne and slipped on a pair of new shoes that I never felt the want to wear until that moment. Then I had a quick sip of milk tea and popped in a breath mint.
Just in case, I thought.
Although, who was I kidding. I was going to kiss Jake, and it would be great just like the other times before, I was sure of it.
And I was right.
Because a few agonizingly long minutes later, Jake was knocking on my door and as soon as the door shut behind us, he wrapped his arms around me and crashed his lips against mine.
I stumbled as he kissed me forcefully, my heart thudding as I tried to catch up but failed. Miserably.
I enjoyed it, though. Of course I did.
He managed to turn me around and push me against the wall, his hands on either side of my head as his lips pressed tightly against mine and his body moved painfully closer to my own.
Before I could push him off, his lips trailed down to my jaw where he pressed a few kisses against my jaw line and I somehow managed to suppress a moan.
"Jake," I said.
He suddenly stepped back and I watched as his eyes turned from lust to shock.
"I'm sorry I-"
I pecked his lips quickly. "Don't apologize for making me feel good."
His face twisted in bewilderment and I tried not to laugh. "But I..."
"Kissed me, yeah. And I liked it, so what are you so sorry about?"
"It was just so..." he moved his hands in the air. "Vulgar."
I shrugged. "I don't mind."
He rubbed the back of his neck. "It wasn't...polite."
"Since when do you care?" I asked, bemused.
He glared playfully. "Shut up. I was trying to be nice but when I saw you I couldn't stop myself."
I looked away, my heart thudding at his words. "Yeah?"
"Yeah." He smiled, his ears turning pink.
"How many people have you kissed before?" I asked, curiously.
"Not many, why?" He frowned.
I shrugged.
"C'mon," he nudged me. "Tell me."
"What does 'not many' mean?" I asked, ignoring him.
"Do drunk kisses count?"
I raised my eyebrows, "Should they?"
He shook his head with a smile, "I don't know maybe five or six people?"
I blinked. "Oh."
He squinted, "Why?"
I shrugged, "Just curious. Where are you taking me?"
He smiled."Can I keep it as a surprise?"
"No," I deadpanned. "I need to know if what I'm wearing is okay."
He eyed me from head to toe. Twice. Which was probably unnecessary.
"No, you're good."
"Tell me," I pressed on.
He shook his head, "Nope."
"Please?" I widened my eyes.
He smiled and leaned in to kiss my lips, but I pushed his shoulders back.
"Nuh uh," I shook my head.
He frowned, "What?"
"No kissing till you tell me," I said.
"That's not fair!" He sputtered.
I smirked."That's what you get. Now, let's get out of here."
Jake shook his head and mumbled something like 'unbelievable' under his breath, only making my smile widen with amusement.
Jake and I got into his car, and I frowned as I put my seatbelt on.
"How is this a surprise if I can see outside the window?"
"Because you won't figure it out until we get there," he said.
"Are you underestimating my skills? I've lived in this city my entire life."
"I lived ten minutes away. Big deal," he said. "And I'm not underestimating your skills."
I squinted at him as he drove away from my apartment and past the café. "Where exactly are you taking me? It better not be illegal."
"Of all people, I thought you'd be the most flexible when it came down to illegal stuff."
I smacked his arm.
"I'm driving!"
"You insulted me!"
He sighed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm just nervous."
I stared at him.
"You're nervous?" I scoffed.
"What does that mean?"
"I don't know, maybe I'm just surprised because you're the one who's kissed ten people before," I said, sarcastically.
I watched as he frowned and sneaked a peek at me. "It wasn't ten! Anyway, how many have you kissed before?"
I looked away.
"Nate..."
"Jake..." I mocked his warning tone.
"I'm serious."
"Why does it matter?"
"It doesn't," he said perplexed. "I just want to know."
"Two," I said. "Three with you included."
He laughed. "Yeah, no. I don't believe you."
"Well, you should 'cause that's the truth. I kissed a guy when I was drunk at a party once, I kissed Tom, and I kissed you."
"Oh."
I could barely look at him.
"Can we stop arguing now?" He asked.
I nodded. "So, what happens if someone you know sees us together?"
He shrugged as he concentrated on the road. "They won't, but either way, I don't care."
"But you're still not sure about your sexuality. Aren't you afraid someone's going to see?"
"I'm not scared. It's just that ever since Devin came back, and I saw how he hurt you, all I could think was how much I could make you feel better. At first I thought that I was being a friend. Friends cheer each other up, right?"
He glanced at me and I nodded.
He turned back to the road.
"Then I started looking at you and all I felt was anger towards Devin. But also hurt because I couldn't do anything about it. That night, when I kissed you...You looked so harmless and all I could think was, what if? What if I could make him forget?"
"You did," I said, my heart clenching.
He smiled. "I'm glad."
"But how does this work? Have you always had doubts?"
"Not really. I can kiss you, it doesn't gross me out. I can have feeling for you and they feel right. I just don't know if I can be with other guys or if it's just you."
"Ohh."
He nodded. "I know. When you took those three days off, they helped me think, too."
"I'm happy I could help." I chuckled.
Jake drove on, and as he did, I found myself staring out the window. What I saw was only a blurry movement of the city I grew up in, yet barely knew. With every passing corner, it dawned to me that I'd never seen that building or the other. As if I've been there before, but in a dream.
We were close to the edge of the city just minutes later.
That was where they kept all the abandoned buildings, empty strip malls, and large parking spaces that haven't been vacant for years.
"Is this the part where you stop the car, pull out an axe, and start hacking at my skull?" I asked, only half serious.
"No," Jake chuckled, and he stopped in front of the tallest building amongst the others.
I remember when it first opened. It used to be the tallest building in our city, and everyone was excited. Devin and I begged our parents to take us there, and finally, my mother agreed that our driver could drop us off there along with our maid. I was so excited, I almost hugged her.
Almost.
The building used to be shiny and clean, with floor to ceiling glass windows, and doors that swooshed when we walked in. It had all those fancy trees outside which bore exotic flowers from some exotic island, and people were always rushing in and out of its ginormous parking lot.
Now it just collected dust.
Its windows, even if broken, held nothing but dirt and rain drop stains. The plants were all cut down, and the parking lot wasn't a parking lot anymore, but another run down department store.
It was kind of sad.
Jake unbuckled his seat belt and I followed suit, both of us stepping out of the car in no time. I started walking towards the entrance, when I noticed Jake wasn't doing the same.
I looked back and saw that he was getting a bag from the boot of his car.
"A picnic?" I guessed.
"Nope."
I frowned, but let him lead me towards the door.
It didn't swoosh. We had to shove it open.
Jake then proceeded to lead towards the stair case and I stopped before we started climbing.
"Are we going to the roof?"
He grinned.
"Isn't it far up?" I groaned.
"Yup."
I groaned again.
"I'll carry you on my back if you pretend you're having fun."
I rolled my eyes. "I am. It's just, if you haven't noticed already, I'm not one to enjoy climbing up endless stair cases."
"They're not endless. Now start climbing." He smiled.
"This better be worth it," I mumbled, and started walking up the stairs along with Jake.
"Think of it this way," he said, "you'll get a reward once we reach there."
With that, I started trudging up faster.
"When am I getting that piggy back ride?"
"Soon."
I tried not to huff.
~
A few minutes later, we were still climbing up the stairs and it was, no surprise, my fault.
Jake was at the landing while I dragged my legs against the steps. "I'm sorry."
"I think it's time I carried you."
I perked up and somehow managed to find just enough energy inside of me to skip a few steps so I could reach him.
I smiled as he bent down, and I slung my arms over his shoulder. He stood up and I quickly wrapped my legs around his waist.
"All good?" He asked, wrapping his fingers around the back of my thighs.
"Mhhm," I hummed.
"Have you ever had a piggyback ride before?" Jake asked.
"Why? Am I being a bad passenger?" I snickered.
He shook his head, "No. Just stop kicking your legs around."
I stopped kicking my legs after that, but I had a feeling Jake didn't really mind so much.
After a while, Jake decided we should take a break.
We opened one of the 'emergency only' doors, and stepped through.
The building used to be a collection of offices and other work or business related facilities. When we stepped through the doors, office desks were still littered across the flooring.
It was a mess. Some drawers were still open, people had left papers upon papers scattered around, and desk chairs were either stacked against a wall or just left where they used to be. Like someone tried to tidy up a bit but gave in eventually.
Jake walked over to a desk and set me down. My shoes instantly connected to a balled up piece of paper, and I kicked it off to the side.
"You're heavy," he commented as he stretched his body.
I shrugged as I tried not to stare at his flexing muscle. "Clearly not heavy enough."
Jake grinned then continued to unravel something from his bag; a smaller bag with an assortment of different sandwiches.
"I got Nutella, PB&J, and BLT. Didn't know which one you'd prefer but I remembered that you like them all," he said.
I grinned. "Can I eat one of each?"
He chuckled. "Sure."
I stared with the BLT sandwich first, then had a few gulps of water that Jake produced from his bag, before I continued on with the rest of the sandwiches.
"I like eating something salty before sweet," I explained once Jake gave me a questioning look.
"Ah," was all he said.
I frowned. "You're not going to eat anything?"
He shook his head, "I'm good."
I shrugged, then rubbed my belly once I felt full. "Will you carry me the rest of the way?"
"Of course, m'lord." He bowed.
I grinned and hopped on his back again, and he proceeded to carry me up the remaining flight of stairs.
"Aren't you tired?" I asked.
"I've been doing this for a long time," Jake answered.
"Since when?"
"A year? Maybe two."
"I never knew..."
"That's because I never told anyone," he said.
I wrapped my legs tighter against his waist and ran my hand down his shoulders to his arm.
"What are you doing?" He asked, sounding amused.
"Checking for your muscles...Aha, found them!" I answered, squeezing his biceps.
He chuckled and the feeling vibrated throughout my body, leaving me with an odd sensation in my stomach.
"We're here," he said once we got to a cringe worthy metal door.
"It's rusted," I pointed out.
He ignored me and loosened his hold on the back of my thighs.
I hopped off his back and we stood in front of the door until Jake pushed it open.
Sun flitted through and I winced as my eyes tried to adjust. Despite the sun's appearance, it was still chilly outside.
Jake took my hand, an action I wasn't quite used to yet, and walked me out the door.
We found a ladder against an even higher platform and Jake helped me up even after I protested that I was fine doing it on my own.
"Look," he said, and he pointed behind us.
I turned and my breath caught at the back of my throat. It was a landscape of the entire city, starting from all the old abandoned buildings to latest ones. Beyond that was just a blur of colors.
"Can you spot the university?" Jake asked.
I squinted as I tried to find the building.
"Right there," I said, pointing in the direction.
"And that's your apartment over there," he said, pointing at a building not so far away.
"How did you find this place?" I finally asked.
He shrugged. "I was just driving around one day and I guess I wondered off too far. Then I decided to look around and this became my secret hide out, I guess. I come here when I need to be far away from everyone else, just to think. The stairs are just an added bonus to my workout routine."
"It's not so secret anymore," I said.
He turned to me and smiled. "I don't mind if it's you."
I felt my heart flip and quickly looked away.
"Uh, so did you come here while I locked myself away?"
He nodded, "Yeah."
I glanced at him, his face practically glowing from the sunlight, the wind ruffling his shirt.
Suddenly I shivered, rubbing my hands against my arms. "It's cold."
"I got a blanket." He pulled out the fluffy thing a few seconds later.
"Are you sure you're not related to Marry Poppins?"
He laughed and wrapped the blanket around me. "Positive."
"Did you get an umbrella too? Incase it rains? Or maybe a-"
He didn't let me finish poking him around. Instead, he turned my face towards his and grazed his lips against my own, stopping me from teasing him anymore than I already had.
He pulled back too soon, and I huffed to express my disappointment. Jake only smiled at me, and didn't let go of my chin.
"I thought you said I'll get a reward if I stopped complaining," I reminded him.
"Are you complaining now?"
I couldn't shake my head so I said, "No...?"
He smiled and kissed me again.
My eyes flickered shut as our lips connected and my chest suddenly felt warm. I managed to move my hand so it rested on the back of his neck, the tips of my fingers brushing against his smooth skin.
I pulled back when I ran out of breath, my lips aching from the impact and the need for more.
After that, I rested my head against Jake's shoulder and we watched the sun set together without saying a word. Not that we needed to say anything, all was clear from that kiss, I thought.
~
"Thank you," I said, once we climbed back down the endless (yet not so endless) staircase, and Jake drove me to my apartment building. "I had a lot of fun"
"I'm glad you did," he said. "And if you ever need a change of scenery, you can always go back there. I don't want you to think its mine or anything like that."
"Okay. Thanks, again."
"Do you want me to..."He trailed off.
"Do you want to come inside?" I redirected the question.
He looked at me with so much emotion in his eyes that I had to blink just to make sure I registered them right.
"Yes," he finally said.
I swallowed, and we both got out of the car, my heart thudding uncontrollably.
But before I could walk any further, Jake pushed me against the passenger door and I looked up in surprise.
He glanced at my lips and pecked them softly. "I couldn't wait any longer."
I didn't know what to say, so I just grabbed both sides of his face and let him kiss me again, but for longer. I forgot that we were in a parking lot where anyone could see us, and let Jake push me harder against his car as he deepened the kiss.
"Nate?"
Jake pulled back and I turned to the sound of my name.
My eyes widened and I felt my heart sink to my stomach.
"Devin."
DUN DUN DUUUN!!
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