Hello everyone! Welcome to my new book. Whatever happens on this book please don't judge me for it. Some content in this book may be suggestions from friends and all content in this book is required to shape the characters as who they are. I apologise in advance.
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Lucy's POV
Darkness... cold...freezing cold. I bit my lip as i walked along the path with my mother. My grip on her hand tightened as freezing cold breeze stung my face, i continued to walked along with my eyes squeezed shut as tight as i could get them.
My mother pulled gently on my arm, "Lucy dear open your eyes" her soft caring voice filled my ears, to me her voice always sounded like a lullaby because whenever she spoke i could have easily fell asleep.
I opened my eyes with hesitation to see our house had come into view, oh how i couldn't wait to get inside into the warm rooms of my double story home.
We stepped up the wooded stairs that led to the front veranda, i stepped onto its wooden board planks. Letting go of my mother's hand i walked over to the right of the front door, took off my shoes and placed them on a wooden shoe rack.
Mum opened the double white, glass door, immediately warm air hit my freezing cold face, i smiled at the feeling. "How are my two favorite girls?" My father walked over to us his tan skin, short black hair and his unusual dark green eyes, making up the father I loved.
"Hey honey" my mum said warmly, while giving him a tight hug. She let go, walked away and so my father turned to me with a huge smile. I wrapped my arms around his waist.
"Oh Lucy, you always seem to grow," my dad said admiringly. I looked up at him and chuckled softly.
"But dad we were only gone for a few hours." i stated.
Dad continued to smile, "true but to me it felt like weeks," his face softened and he pulled me closer to his body. However the happy family i was in didn't stay like that for long.
I jumped awake to screaming and yelling, sitting up alert in my double bed i looked around my dark room slightly startled.
I got up out of bed and walked along my carpet floor, opened my door and silently walked along the wooden floor boards and stopped when i reached the edge of the stairs.
I sat down and listened intently, "what do you mean you don't know!" Mum screamed at Dad
"I don't have to explain myself to you!" he yelled back at her.
Continuous yelling and screaming filled the usually silent house. I ran back into my room, got back into bed and lied on my side with my hands over my ears trying to block out the noise.
After a good 30 minutes of arguing, i heard a door slam and a car engine start, then the sound of car tyre's ripping at the road.
Cold wet tears started to spill from my eyes, i didn't bother wiping them away. Instead i closed my eyes and cried myself to sleep, dreading tomorrow as i had too go to school.
Next day at school, i couldn't concentrate on anything. My mind was racing, thoughts over-clouding other thoughts.
My friends would ask me what was wrong but i didn't tell then because i felt alone. I found out when i woke that my Mum had left last night and hadn't come back.
The bell rang signaling us to go home, i grabbed my bag and headed off. Walking home would take me 10 minutes, so i wasted no time. When my house got into view, parked on the road outside was a police car.
i immediately started running as fast as my legs would allow, long brown hair covering my face but i didn't care; I just wanted to get home as fast as i could.
I ran up the stairs and opened the front door; ran to the living room. there i saw my Dad sitting on the couch with his elbows resting on his knees and his face cupped in his hands.
I heard crying and sobbing, when Dad finally realized i was there, he looked up at me with a tear stained face and puffy eyes.
"Dad... what happened?" i asked unwilling to know the truth, he tried to steady his breathing and racing heartbeat, but failed.
"Your mother, she left last night and got into an accident... she slammed into a truck, sh-she was...instantly...k-killed" he said between his sobs.
I felt my knees buckle beneath me, i fell to the floor and cried even more than last night. The last memory of my mother was an argument that i will never forget.
I shot awake, breathing heavily and sweating. i got up and walked to the bathroom, but first checking my phone for the date 26th May... i sighed.
No wonder i had that flashback, today is the day... mum never returned home, i thought. I looked in the mirror expecting to see the same thing when i have that flashback, and sure enough my face was tear stained. i looked like a zombie.
I walked downstairs, ever since Mum died, i replay her and Dad's argument every time i walk down these stairs. It's not on purpose it just...happens.
I arrived in the kitchen; my destination of choice, opened the pantry and grabbed the bread and Nutella. I made a sandwich, sat down started eating. I heard foot steps coming down the stairs and i knew it was my Dad.
"Hey, Lucy" Dad said cheerfully, i continued to eat my breakfast, not talking or looking up at him. He sighed grabbed his own breakfast and sat down across from me.
"You know i haven't forgotten about today" he said his dark green eyes trying to penetrate my fiery ones, i continued to stay silent. "i have arranged for you to go to a Doctor, you aren't yourself."
My head snapped up towards my father, "i'm fine, i don't need to see a Doctor" i said bluntly, i will admit ever since mum died i hadn't been myself, but i was FINE now.
"Lucy, you never smile or laugh, your always sad, its worrying me." i sighed this time, he always does this, its getting annoying.
"Fine," i gave up, only because i didn't have time to argue about a stupid Doctor, i have to get to school.
Later at School:
"Hey Lucy, how are you doing" Casey, my friend asked, she was a kind soul. she had red hair that went down to her shoulders, pale skin and hazel eyes.
"Yeah i'm fine,"?i said without emotion, for years now, my friends have been trying to tell me that i have depression and that it was caused by my mother dying.
"Lu, you should see someone about this. Just please don't shut us out" Finn, one of my best friends in the whole world pleaded.
he had short, messy black hair, tan skin and really dark brown eyes. I stared him in the face,
"you can try all you like but i'm not seeing anyone...well not with my own will." i said and both friends were confused, i didn't answer the last comment Finn made because...it was probably true.
"Just promise you won't do anything to yourself." Casey begged me, i was sick of people pleading and begging.
Turning towards her i whispered without a thought, "i can't."
The bell rang for us to go to our next class, while everyone was running and racing to get to their class, i however was just strolling not caring if i was late or not.
Ding, the second bell rang, which means i am officially late to class. Approaching the classroom door, i could see that class had already started and by the looks of the students faces and the writing on the board, i'm guessing it was math.
I knocked on the classroom door and entered. All heads looked up from desks and over to me "Miss. Jensen, you are 10 minutes late to class, explain yourself" my teacher Miss. Hamill ordered, an angered look on her face.
"Sorry Miss, i didn't hear the bell" i said quietly, i felt all eyes on me, watching my every move. Up the back i saw my two friends staring at me with worried eyes.
"One more time and you will be staying after school. Go sit down" Miss. Hamill said slightly disappointed. as i walked over to my desk in between my two friends i heard whispers among people, i continued to walk and ignored them.
Later That Day:
"So how long has this been going on for?" the Doctor asked, Dad and I had arrived at the Doctor surgery a while ago and had been waiting forever.
"for about 2 years. Ever since her mother died" Dad explained everything to the Doctor while i just sat there thinking about my dear mother.
--time skip--
We pulled up outside the crematorium, Dad shut off the car and we sat there in silence. "Look we don't-" i cut my father off by putting up my hand towards his face
"I want to do this, you can stay here if you want." i turned to face him, after that fight that led to my Mum's death i had never looked at my father the same way.
"I have something to tell you... that night Mum left, i heard the whole thing, i heard how you made Mum leave, you the reason she's dead so save your breath trying to act like you care about her!"
i yelled at my father, anger boiling within my bones. i opened the car door, got out then slammed it shut before my anger exploded me; leaving my father before he could say anything at all.
I walked over to my Mother's grave stone, light grey stone, slightly cracked and covered in vines.
My heart and soul sunk at the state of her grave. i removed the vines and leaves carefully, scared that the stone will crumble beneath my touch.
Once the vines and leaves were removed i read what was en-carved on the rough surface Here lies Eliza, born 1971 died 2011. Loving Mother and wife, missed by all.
My knees shook, then buckled beneath me, i fell to the ground my legs tucked under me. I felt my eyes start to water and i hadn't even started talking yet.
I gently rubbed my right hand fingers over the stone, trying to feel my Mother's presence.
"Hey Mum, how have you been? its been two years now since you left. MI always knew that the night you died, before hand you and dad had a big fight. That day at your funeral I said I wouldn't cry and I wouldn't shut anyone out or focus on your death, but i just couldn't do it."
Tears began to slide down my cheeks then fall off the edge of my face, i watched the tear fall onto my mothers ground bound stone.
Suddenly along with stray tears, raindrops started to fall on her stone. I looked towards the sky and saw that the once clear sky had become overclouded with grey clouds.
Rain fell on me, i shivered and pulled my jacket over my bear shoulders. There was no rain falling on me anymore, i looked backwards and saw my father; his face full of sorrow.
He knelt down beside me holding an umbrella from the car.
"You know Lucy when your mum and me had that fight, I never wanted her to die, I never wanted this." he sounded so genuine I almost believed him, almost.
I shook my head and gave him a deep stare "if you really meant that you would have gone after her. You would have stopped her." I said cold and distant he sighed from behind me.
"I saw this in the car, I thought you would need it," he held up a black folder. Instantly I knew what it was, I took it from my father, thanked him and turned back to my mothers stone.
"If your watching me right now, you remember how I love to draw? Well I made you this," I said while opening the black cover and pulling out a laminated black and white sketch of a Phoenix.
it was Mum's favorite animal. I asked her once why it was her favorite animal and she answered by saying, a Phoenix is a brave and beautiful bird. It is a fighter as well as a protector, it has two sides to it, warm and cold. In other words its two sides are fire and water.
I placed the drawing on the grass below and put 4 heavy rocks on the corners to keep it there.
I took one finale look at the drawing, stood and left, knowing that I would be back in a few days time. Later at home I locked myself in my room and chattered to Casey on Skype.
To Casey- Hey what r u doing?
From Casey- nothing much. What about you?
To Casey- went to Mum's grave and gave her that drawing of the Phoenix.
From Casey- oh cool. I have a question to ask.
To Casey- Shoot
From Casey- Well Finn and me have been friends for like 10 years. Do you think he likes me?
I knew this question would come up eventually just didn't know when, but I decided to answer honestly.
To Casey- Case you are a great and wonderful girl, if he can't see that then you can do better. But to answer your question further, I think he does, he always gets more cheerful when your around. Give it time.
From Casey- okay, thanks. I have to go now sorry, TTYL.
With that she logged off so I decided to draw, and yes I was drawing another Phoenix. I drew for 2 hours before I finally finished.
I remembered what Mum said about Phoenix's having two sides, so I drew one Phoenix but one half as fire with flames covering the wing and other side was water, which obviously had water covering the other wing.
I studied my handy work for any imperfections to fix, by found non at all. I checked the time on my phone 12:00am.
I sighed, putting the drawing in a plastic sleeve so it wouldn't get damaged, I headed off to bed.
As you probably would have guessed Phoenix's are my favorite animal as well, so my quilt cover was of a orange and red Phoenix.
Mum had it custom made for my birthday a few years back. I slipped into bed, rested my head on my pillow and closed my eyes; waiting to fall asleep and dream of Phoenix's and Mum.
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Sorry that was a bit short but I promise I will make the chapter much longer. This story is a working process so please be patient with me. Yes Lucy's mum is dead and she blames her father for it but is her father really responsible for her mothers death? We will find out. Bye guys, hope you love Phoenix's. :)