A few hours later Alex left Angelica in the kitchen, laughing and talking with the other women while he sniffed out Damien. He found him alone in the library, sitting at a table and looking out the window.
"Damien." Alex said when he walked in and the tall, blond demon turned to look at him.
"Yes?"
"You need to learn how to be more supportive of Angelica instead of being such a hard ass." Alex said and Damien stood up and gave him a hard look as he crossed his arms over his chest.
"I have been dealing with all of her irrational fears for a lot longer than you have. You will soon grow just as tired of it." Alex shook his head and sat down on the back of the couch.
"No I won't because the irrational fears are very rational and she's already getting better. Can't you tell that she's getting better?" Damien nodded.
"She is and that's what scares me." he said. He decided that it was best to open up and be honest with Alex since most of what he'd been saying lately had made him sound like a cold, heartless monster and that wasn't what he was at all.
"Why does that scare you?" Alex asked as he twisted the chain on his pants around his finger.
"She is taking all her strength from you. What happens when you grow tired of her and leave?" Alex laughed at first but then realized that Damien wasn't joking.
"Damien, I love her. I'm not going anywhere."
"Then why haven't you told her that she's your mate?" Alex shrugged and tapped his fingers on the table top beside him.
"Because I know that what I'm feeling is real but I want her to know it is too and I'm afraid she won't if she knows I'm her mate." he replied. "She still needs you too, you know. She needs you to support her and be there for her. Only difference is that now she can go get her own groceries."
"I do thank you for that." Damien said. "I never pushed her to leave because she would begin to panic and scream and I didn't want to see her like that."
"She's tougher than you think. But she did cry after you left this morning." Damien's eyes widened with surprise.
"Why?" he demanded. Emotions still confused him greatly.
"Because you weren't happy that she was happy." Alex replied. "And because you didn't think that I really cared about her or thought she was pretty."
"I never said those things." Damien argued and Alex shrugged.
"I told you that she's smarter than you think. She picked up on it." he said and then he raised his brow and crossed his arms over his chest.
"I do care and I do think she pretty... Hell I think she's beautiful." Alex saw Damien's look of disbelief and he grinned. "Okay at first I didn't think so but once you get to know her and you see the goodness inside she is beautiful."
"If you hurt her...." Damien warned.
"I won't hurt her." Alex assured him. Both men stared hard at each other for several long moments and finally Damien sighed and nodded.
"Okay. If she trusts you and you say you mean her no harm then I'll trust you too."
"Good." Alex said with a grin. "I was kind of worried you'd kick my skinny butt for coming in here and telling you what I thought."
"No. It would not be a fair fight." Damien replied, scratching at his muscular forearm. "I am glad that my mother has someone who isn't afraid to stand up for her."
"I hate to interrupt this touching father/son moment but the food is ready." Kayleb said with a laugh as he poked his head into the library.
"I don't eat." Damien replied while Alex tried, and failed, to think of a witty response to Kayleb's comment.
"Kaylee said to tell you to come on. Do you want me to tell her you said you don't eat." Damien shook his head quickly.
"No that will make her angry." he said. "I come when she calls or else I have to deal with more of her crazy emotions."
"I am so telling her that you just said she was crazy." Kayleb said and he took off back down the hallway. Damien muttered something under his breath and then left the library as well. Alex looked around the room. Shelves full of books covered the walls from floor to ceiling. He definitely had to bring Angelica in here. She would love this room.
He walked to the kitchen and Angelica quickly crossed the room and wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug. Thankful that he was here with her again in this crowd of bodies.
"It smells good." Alex said as he led her to the table and pulled out a chair for her before sitting down in a chair beside her.
"I helped make it. I hope you like it." Angelica said as Alex placed a piece of meatloaf on both of their plates.
"I'm sure it'll be great." he said.
"I'm so hungry I'd eat it even if it tasted like a giant turd." Kent said matter of factly.
"Kent, please try to act like you have an ounce of sophistication and don't talk about bodily waste at the table." Bethany said tossing her hair over her shoulder. As the family began eating their meal, Angelica found herself feeling more and more comfortable around them. She looked over at Damien and he smiled at her and it was the first time she had ever seen a warm, caring look like that in his eyes when he looked at her.
(Alex, did you say something to Damien?) Angelica asked so only Alex could hear. Alex smiled, enjoying the sound of her voice in his head.
(He does care about you, sweetheart.) Angelica smiled at Alex and laid her head on his shoulder before going back to her meal.
"Hey sis, guess what king demon said about you?" Kayleb asked before sticking a forkful of mashed potatoes into his mouth.
"What?" Kaylee replied.
"He said that you are a moody pain in his ass and you drive him crazy." Kayleb said with a grin. Damien just shook his head and Kaylee looked over at him.
"Did you say that?" she asked.
"Not exactly." Damien replied and Alex winced. That was the wrong answer.
"What exactly does 'not exactly' mean?" she demanded. Alex felt Angelica grab his arm and he could tell she was afraid by the confrontation.
"It's okay." he whispered and she felt a tremor pass down her spine as his warm breath blew across her exposed neck. She was helpless to speak and stuck a bite of meatloaf in her mouth instead.
"I said that your emotions are crazy." Damien said to Kaylee and Lane laughed.
"Dig that hole, demon boy, dig that hole. I've dug a fair share of my own holes in the past."
"By the past he means just this morning." Joey added and Lane smiled and took a bite of food.
"My emotions are not crazy, Damien, I'm a woman and we are more complicated than the simpler sex." Kaylee said matter of factly.
"Now you're insulting all of us men?" Evan asked his daughter and Kaylee nodded.
"Yes I am." she replied.
"That's a bunch of B.S." Kayleb grumbled. "There is at least one woman at this table that is crazier than any of us men." His gaze hesitated on Angelica for only a second before moving back to Kaylee but it was long enough that Alex and nearly everyone else at the table caught onto it.
"Who would that be?" Bethany asked. She had been too busy eating to see Kayleb's glance at Angelica.
"Yeah, Kayleb, who would that be?" Alex asked, finding that suddenly he was angry.
"Well, I mean, uh.... Angelica is a bit eccentric sometimes. Have the beans said anything interesting today?" Kayleb asked not realizing just how angry Alex was and Vanessa slapped him on the back of the head.
"Is that right?" Alex asked as most of the table chuckled. He looked over at Angelica and saw that she was picking at her food and looked near tears.
"She's silly." Faith agreed and Alex stood up.
"This is ridiculous. I thought there would be one safe place I could bring her where no one would make fun or torment her but obviously I was wrong and this family isn't the family I thought it was."
'It's okay, Alex, I am crazy." Angelica said as she fought back her tears and tried to tug his arm and make him sit back down. For someone so tall and lanky he was much stronger than he looked.
"Alex, honey, we didn't mean to laugh." Jordan said to her son.
"Yes you did." Alex said.
"No we didn't... Angelica has done some things that have been funny since we've known her and Kayleb's words made us think of those things. We're sorry." Laney said.
"Sometimes sorry doesn't mean shit." Alex said glaring at his muscle bound, red haired cousin who had started this mess.
"Alex, please don't, I really am crazy. They have every right to laugh at me." Angelica said desperately as tears ran down her cheeks.
"No they don't." Damien snarled and Kaylee nodded in agreement. Alex couldn't believe that the only people who hadn't laughed at his mate were Lane, Joey, Angela, Jake, Damien, Kaylee, Hunter and Vanessa. Everyone else seemed to think that Kayleb calling her crazy was funny.
"You are not crazy. You are smart, beautiful and amazing."
"No, I'm not." Angelica said and Alex growled. Thanks to Kayleb's big mouth his mate was crying and in pain. Kayleb better be glad that Alex was different than Uncle Jake or else Kayleb would be picking pieces of himself up off the floor right now.
"Angelica, I...." Kayleb started but Alex cut him off.
"We're leaving." he said. He pulled Angelica close and the two of them disappeared.
"I didn't mean to make anybody mad or make her cry." Kayleb said as he rubbed his face and looked over at his sister and Damien. "I'm sorry."
"Yeah you are." Damien snarled and he stood from the table and left the room.
"Nice job, family. Way to be a bunch of assess." Kaylee snapped and she followed after her mate.
"For once, I was one of the mature ones." Lane said, sounding very proud of himself.
"We have to fix this." Rebecca said as she leaned against her mate with tears in her eyes. "I would never do anything to hurt anyone on purpose."
"Me either." Laney agreed.
"The woman talks to thin air and has conversations with her food, she is crazy." Bethany spoke up and this earned her a glare from everyone else at the table. "So now I'm the bad guy because I said what the rest of you were thinking?" she demanded and she stood and left the table as well.
"I know she can be a bitch, but I love her." Greg said apologetically as he stood to follow her.
"I heard that!" she yelled from the hallway and Greg winced and followed after her.
"Our son hates us." Jordan said to Kent.
"I don't blame him." Kent said. "If someone had said something bad about you I would hate them too."
"The great Collins clan messed up." Kayleb grumbled. "Not very often that that happens." Jake went about eating his food as if nothing had happened.
"Aren't you upset?" Raquel demanded of her oldest brother. Jake looked up and shrugged.
"Why? It isn't any of my business."
888
"You're okay, Angelica." Alex said as he held her cradled in his arms on the couch. He hadn't dashed her to her cabin because he hadn't wanted her to be able to lock herself away the way she had in the past. Instead he had dashed to his apartment in California.
"No I'm not." Angelica said through her tears. The front of Alex's black t-shirt was soaked with their hot wetness. "First the people at the restaurant, then the clerk at the department store and now your family... There has to be something wrong with me."
Alex growled as he thought about the clerk at the department store who had laughed outright at the sight of Angelica. He knew that Kaitlyn had dealt with the situation by threatening to go to the manager and the clerk had been so upset she had ended up giving them half off the clothes they bought in order to save her job, but that didn't change the fact that he wished he had been there to take care of Angelica himself. Kaitlyn hadn't been at dinner and for that Alex was grateful. She probably would have laughed like her mother had and it would have hurt Angelica to see her new shopping buddy making fun of her too.
"There is nothing wrong with you. It's the rest of the world that has the problem." Alex replied. He was ashamed by the fact that he had once been part of the problem. He hadn't insulted her to her face in the beginning but to others he had went on about her being ugly and crazy. He wanted to kick himself for ever thinking those things about this woman, who had completely stolen his heart in such a short amount of time.
"Where are we?" Angelica asked as she wiped her face clean on his shirt and then pulled away. Alex looked around his fairly messy suite and smiled.
"This is where I live." he said. Angelica pulled herself to her feet and Alex was amazed that she had gone from having a break down, to perfectly fine in just a matter of seconds. She walked over to the wide windows and looked out at the crowded city streets and fancy homes all around them.
"It's very nice." she said. Alex watched her walk around the living room. She ran her fingertips along the edge of the pool table and then smiled at him.
"I've seen this played on television." she said. Alex was momentarily speechless. The sight of her looking so beautiful with her fingertips gently tracing the wooden edges of the table, her feminine hip cocked to the side, and her smile lighting up her face excited him more than even Candy had with all her sex appeal, sprawled on the table when he'd come home the other night.
He wanted nothing more than to grab her and lay her down on the pool table and make love to her. Not sex... Nothing done with Angelica would be as simple as sex. No, it would be love making and it would include his heart and soul for the first time.
"Are you okay?" Angelica asked. She recognized the hungry, passionate look on his face and it scared her. She had learned from the kisses they had shared that not all kisses were cold and painful like the one's Victor had given to her but that didn't mean sex would be any different.
She couldn't stand to be hurt by Alex.... She needed him too much.
"Yeah, I'm fine." Alex said, seeing the fear in her eyes. He cleared his throat and stood up, thankful that his baggy clothes hid his arousal. "Have you ever played?" he asked pointing at the table. Angelica laughed.
"Did you see one in my cabin?" she asked.
"Nope." Alex grabbed a pool stick from the rack on the wall. "You want me to teach you how?" Excitement lit up her face.
"Will you?" she asked.
"Of course." Alex said with a grin. He handed her the stick and then positioned himself behind her, covering her body with his and showing her the right way to hold the stick. Angelica felt her body heating and her heart beating faster at the close contact of their bodies.
Alex hoped she wouldn't feel his arousal but there was no way she could miss it with their bodies pressed so closely together.
"You line up your shot like this." he said as he guided her hands. His voice was rough and he cleared his throat. "Then you pull back and hit the white ball to make it knock the other balls into the holes." He helped her take a shot and when a red and white ball went into the corner pocket she yelled with triumph and turned in his arms.
"I did it!" she exclaimed.
"Yes you did." Alex replied as he sat the stick down on the pool table and ran his thumb over her jaw.
"Alex....." she said breathlessly as she looked at the passion darkening his blue eyes.
"I want you, Angelica. I've never wanted anyone the way I want you." He tilted her head up and then crushed his lips against hers. He forgot all about taking it slow as his passion for her poured from him. The kiss was hungry and desperate and Angelica clung to his arms for support. He put his hands on her waist and lifted her so she was sitting on the edge of the table, then he used his leg to spread her knees apart so he could position his body between them.
He let her vanilla scent fill his senses as her hands ran down his back and he buried one of his hands in her golden hair. His other hand traced up her waist, across her rib cage and then his thumb touched her breast through the satiny fabric of her shirt and she froze. Her moans changed from those of passion to moans of fear and she put her hands on her chest and shoved him back.
Alex broke away and stumbled back several steps. His body was on fire with need but he forced himself to take a deep breath and look at her. She had her arms wrapped tight around herself and she was rocking back and forth and staring at the ground.
"Sweetheart..." Alex's voice was deep and gruff so he cleared his throat and started over. "What's wrong? Did I hurt you?" Angelica shook her head quickly.
"I can't do it! I can't!" she said and Alex could hear her fear, sadness and disappointment and his ardor cooled several degrees instantly. He walked back to her and laid a gentle hand on her shoulder.
"Why?" he asked. "Why can't you? Don't you trust me?"
"Yes.. But.. I can't tell you."
"You can tell me anything."
"No we agreed to not say his name anymore." she said and Alex groaned and rubbed his face with his free hand.
"Victor." he said. "Victor raped you." Angelica shivered and he wrapped his arms tight around her and pulled her back into his chest as she once again began to cry.
Her tears surprised her. For years she had been living with only fear.. Fear all the time.. To finally feel emotions that made her laugh and cry was something new to her.
"Angelica, I would never hurt you. I'm sorry I got carried away."
"You didn't. I've seen it on television. I'm supposed to have sex with you, I just can't." she sniffed against him. Alex shook his head.
"You don't have to do anything with me that you don't want to do. And I don't want to have sex with you." Angelica pulled away enough so she could look at him.
"You don't?" she asked, looking crushed. He kissed her nose and smiled.
"No. I want to make love with you. I won't rush you." Angelica wiped her face and then jumped from the pool table and moved away from him.
"I had nightmares last night and couldn't sleep well. Can I take a nap?" she asked, doing her usual lightning fast change of subject.
"Yes you can." he grinned. "My beds through that door." Angelica nodded and then quickly turned and walked away from him, closing the bedroom door behind her. Alex went to the kitchen and opened the freezer to let the cold air help cool his heated blood.
He shut the freezer and leaned his head against it as he yawned. He hadn't gotten home from the gig the night before until nearly three am and he'd been up just a couple of hours later to find flowers for Angelica and get to her as quick as he could... He could use a nap himself.
He walked into the bedroom to find her on her side, buried beneath his thick black comforter in his king size bed. He pulled off his tear soaked shirt and slid into the bed behind her. He felt her stiffen when he circled his body around hers.
"I just want to hold you, sweetheart. I'll leave if you want me to." Angelica shook her head.
"I want to feel you holding me. Maybe the nightmares won't come." Alex kissed her hair.
"Victor and Rotan, you better leave my woman alone because I've told you once that I don't like to share. Don't make me lose my temper with you both." Angelica giggled and the sound was like music to Alex's ears. He wrapped his arm tight around her, making sure to keep from touching her breasts and he buried his face in her hair.
They lay there like that a long time. Alex heard her breathing deepen and become steady and he could tell that she had fallen asleep. He pressed his lips to her ear and whispered,
"I love you." Then he closed his own eyes and fell asleep.