I've stayed in Boston three weeks now. I've done absolutely everything to keep my mind off Louis. I've visited my grandmother, my aunts and uncles along with my cousins, I've gone to work with both my parents but ended up just bugging the whole times, and I've stayed in the house all day with Spot. None of this has worked.
Louis' wedding is in a week. I'll be here and I'm 99.9% sure of that. That .1% is what is worrying me. That .1% telling me to follow my heart and not my brain. I guess we'll find out about that .1% soon.
I sat down on the couch with my popcorn thinking about this. Soon Spot came and joined me then my dad who had caught the popcorn scent.
"Hey honey." He took a seat next to me, grabbing a handful of popcorn.
"Mine!" I joked as I pulled the bowl away.
He laughed, stuffing his face with more popcorn. We sat watching the news until I switched a movie on.
"Again?" He asked as I turned The Vow on. I didn't love this movie but it what had inspired me to come home for awhile. I wanted to make sure I made the right choice.
"Dad do you think I made the right choice?" I asked suddenly. I needed someone to tell me I made the right choice; Some outlook would be nice.
"Well that's up to you." He answered.
I groaned, "That doesn't help me.."
"It's all up to you." He said again, kissing my forehead and heading back into his room.
It's all up to me..
I pondered on this for awhile. Was it all up to me?
*~*
It's been another week since I was told it was all up to me. I thought about it for the whole week. It was up to me. All of it or none of it. It was up to me.
Today is also Louis' wedding day. It starts in about six hours according to the news. I can't believe they're reporting it. I really can't believe I'm watching it while sitting my pajamas.
My phone started ringing as they began to talk about who was going to be there.
"Helllooo." I answered.
"Karm, Louis is looking for you." Lisa said frantically.
"What?!" I stood up, the blankets around me falling off.
"Louis he came to your apartment to see you and then he didn't find and came down to my apartment and asked where you were. I told him you were in Boston and he said oh. Then he ran off to his car; he looked sad too. Karm he really misses you. I know he does." She said all in one breathe.
"Lisa.. I.. I'm in Boston! Nothing he can do now!" I said bewildered. He came looking for me on his wedding day. His. Wedding. Day.
"Karm it's a what? Four hour flight or something? Come back! Tell him your feelings before its too late!" Before it's too late. Too late to see him again. Too late because he's going to marry someone else. I thought it was already too late but maybe not.
"Lisa let me." I sighed. "Let me think right now."
"Call me if you need me. I've got to go. Work." She said hanging up. She left me to think about everything.
"Hey Karm." My dad came into the room snapping his fingers to no particular rhythm.
"Dad you know how you said it's all up to me?" I asked following him into the kitchen.
"Yup why?" He peeled a banana.
"Well what if its up to my heart and my brain. Who wins that fight?" I asked.
He stopped chewing his food and looked at me. He already knew what I was thinking to do. "Karm, it's up to what makes you happy."
I nodded and slid a pair of shoes on and grabbed my phone. I didn't need anything else. I asked my dad to watch Spot and he agreed to, handing me his credit card.
I took it, running out the door and sliding into the car. From there I raced to the airport.
*~*
I ran off the plane, still in my pajamas. I called Lisa to pick me up; she was so glad to hear me say this. Now we were heading to the church Louis was about to get married in.
"Do you think I missed it?" I asked moving my leg nervously.
"No. Not yet." She answered swerving around everything.
"What if he doesn't feel the same? What if-" "KARMANTHA YOU JUST RODE A PLANE FROM BOSTON TO LONDON FOR THE GUY YOU LOVE BECAUSE I TOLD YOU. DON'T LIVE WITH WHAT IFS!" Lisa shouted as she pulled into the church filled with fans of the boys. It was quite weird.
"Thank you." I smiled, running out the door.
I ran through the groups of girls screaming my name. I barged through the door as the priest said speak now or forever hold your peace.
"Stop!" I shouted. "I don't agree with this marriage!" I was trying to catch my breathe as I said all of this. Plus I was in my pajamas.
Everyone turned around watching me. I felt like I was in a dream were I go to school in my undies. It was that frightening.
"Louis," I walked closer to the alter looking at the Louis the whole time, "What are you doing?"
"Karm, I should be asking you the same question." Louis tried to hold back a smile. Maybe he was happy to see me.
"What I'm doing is telling you how much I love you and why you shouldn't marry Eleanor." I looked over at her an she stood with her mouth hanging open.
"Remember when we met in sixth grade? When I transversed from Boston? The first thing you said to me was you have such a great accent. I said same to you...? And you said Louis and I said Karmantha. You said that it was too long but very pretty for a pretty girl so you'd call me Karm. And that's what you still call me till this day; I fell in love with you that day. And god dammit Louis I love it,
"I also love that I can feel your smile through the phone when you talk to me. I can't help but smile back. I love that I feel bulletproof in your arms. You have no idea how much I love that. I love that I can never stay mad at you for more than a few minutes because I know that I can't talk to you then. I love that I can say anything and you understand. I love that I could be in the worst outfit possible and you can find that one thing that makes it okay to wear. I love that I could were pajamas and my hairs a mess that you find it cute. I really hope you find it cute right now.
"I love that I can be myself around you. Not many people see that real me. I love that you'll stay with me and wipe the tears away even if you're the cause. I love that you're you and you haven't changed one bit. I love the way your blue eyes change with your mood and how they sparkle when you're with me. I just love you general. I love you Louis William Tomlinson." I wiped a stray tear away as it slid down my cheek.
I had kept that bottled up and hidden from him for so long; it felt so nice to stay.
I looked at him and he had a grin plastered on his face. The kind of grin you can't help but smile at. I laughed through my few tears and he ran up to me, wrapping his arms around me, and twirled me around. Everyone gasped and watched us but we didn't care.
He set me down and crushed his lips into mine. The kiss was electrifying and thrilling. It captured everything I had said. Every single word was in that kiss.
"I love you Karmantha Nicole Williams!" He screamed and everyone on Eleanor's side stood in shock but Louis' family stood up and clapped.
I looked at them from in Louis' arms and laughed because I wasn't expecting it. Louis joined in with my laughter and kissed the top of my head.
"Louis!" Eleanor screamed. I've never heard her shout so loudly.
We turned to her and she stood angry. Her arms crossed and her bouquet tossed aside.
She lifted up her lacy dress, waking down the few steps gracefully. She came up to Louis and looked at him in his adorable eyes, slapping him right across the face as her tears fell.
"Bitch! I don't think so!" I shouted and turned around after her but Louis kept a grip on me, spinning me around, kissing me once again.
He pulled away and I smiled at him; he smiled back with that sparkle in his eyes.
"How long have you loved me?" I whispered.
"Since the day I met you Mrs. Boston." He whispered back, giving me a peck on the mouth.