Monday morning was hard to get going. Between the morning sickness, Noah being up half the night and now being clingy, and waking up to find that nothing fit her. Olivia was having a very tough time and was thankful that Lucy was there. With her dry heaving while trying to deal with Noah... God she felt so bad that he was reaching for her in tears while she was hunched over the toilet, sick.
Noah had had another dream last night, he woke up just after midnight and was so upset that she had to put him into bed with her so he'd feel safe enough to go back to sleep. Finally after singing to him and carrying him around for hours, he went to sleep around three and she got to sleep for about 90 minutes before her morning sickness woke her up and she went running for the bathroom. She called Nick at just after 5 in the morning, and got about ten minutes of conversation time before Noah woke up again crying for her, she got lucky though because she put him on speaker with Nick and that took his mind off whatever was bothering him and he went back to sleep for a bit.
Now after finally calming her stomach enough and getting dressed she cursed out loud because the clothes that fit her (barely) on friday literally would not today. She had to put on a pair of pants and leave them open with a belt that was precariously holding on to its last two hooks to hold them up and leave her blouse untucked, a blouse which did not button over her breasts that no longer fit into her bras, she had to wear a sports bra and leave a few buttons on her blouse undone. Her breasts would surely ache but at least she was covered and at least her jacket fit (barely). She seriously had to go maternity clothes shopping.
By the time she was all done with everything and managed to calm Noah down so that she could get out the door she was already late and Noah wasn't as calm as she thought, crying "mama" as she left and reaching for her. Lucy assured her that he'd be fine but he threw a fit and she went back to him for ten minutes but then she absolutely had to leave. He was freaking out, she started to cry feeling guilt at leaving her son like this, she didn't know why he was behaving this way and she was also feeling completely overwhelmed. By the time she got downstairs she couldn't stop and was bawling as she left the building and took a cab, leaving everyone who saw her looking perplexed and a couple of people asking if she was okay. God why did her hormones have to strike at the worst times?
.
9:28 she finally got to work, red eyed from crying, worries about Noah and nauseous and she just wanted 5 minutes of quiet to herself.
"Mornin boss" Carisi greeted from where he and Amanda were gathered at the coffee pot but she simply threw up her hand and retreated to her office and closed the door before anyone could utter another word, then as soon as she had closed the door she was coming out and making a beeline for the bathroom seconds later.
"If that isn't pregnant..." Carisi started.
"Tell me about it; I mean she can't hide it for much longer, look at her. Wonder when she's gonna tell us." Rollins stated.
"Better question, who's the dad?" Jackson said
"I got some ideas about that." Amanda said, picking up a suger packet.
"Care to share?" Moroni said.
"Nope!" Amanda said and walked off.
"What is it with people and secrets around here?" Carisi wondered out loud.
... ... ...
Moments later after Olivia had emptied her stomach, she went back through the squad room in hopes of getting back to her office with no incident but she wasn't to be that lucky. It was Amanda who stopped her.
"Sarge, you okay? You don't look so good." She said, sipping her coffee.
"Yeah...I'm uh, I'm fine." She said, actually sickened by the coffee and whatever Carisi was eating on a bagel, what was that? Bacon, eggs and cheese? God, those eggs smell rancid! And what was that that Johnson was eating? Something with sausage? She had to get into her office before she...
"Benson, just the person I wanted to see!" Lieutenant Tucker said as he walked in. She rolled her eyes which didn't go unnoticed by Amanda who tried to stifle a laugh, slowly Olivia turned around.
"Lieutenant... What can I do for you?" She asked trying to sound way perkier that she felt.
"A word?" He asked. She gestured toward her office and they went inside and shut the door.
"Look if this is about my pregnancy, I already told 1PP it won't be an issue." She said sitting down, thankful to be out of the squad room and away from the smells.
"Relax Sergeant it's not about your pregnancy, by the way, you told your squad yet?"
"...not yet. So to what do I owe this pleasure?"
"What? I can't just pop in?" He asked, joking.
"No. What's going on?"
"Well, I was sniffin around 1PP and the skuttlebutt is they want a Lieutenant in here." Olivia had a look of uncertainty on her face, half shock. "They're not happy with a Sergeant runnin things.
"Last that I checked I was doing a pretty good job... We busted Johnny D's sex trafficking ring, we took down Yates after Chicago botched it..."
"And they've noticed. They're open to the prospect of you stayin on... That's why I told them you already filed for the Lieutenant's exam."
She gave him a look that said pretty clear 'what the fuck, are you kidding me?'
"But I haven't."
"Then don't make a liar out of me." He said, amused. She simply got up from her desk and began walking around her office suddenly feeling nauseated again on top of everything else.
"I'm quite happy with the way things are, thank you.
"Look, they want a Lieutenant and if it's not you, it's gonna be somebody else." He informed her. Now she was getting a headache just thinking about this. She couldn't imagine putting more on her plate right now.
"I don't know what to say!" She said with a hand to her stomach.
"That's a first..." He grinned but she looked at him with a mixture of humor and hate. "Think about it, also, think about who your second whip would be...better you than a blind draw!"
"Tucker..."
"You'll do fine. Congrats on the baby by the way." And he turned and left, leaving her standing there wondering what she was going to do. She sat down and called home.
"Hey Liv." Lucy said.
"Hey, how's he doing?"
"He actually cried himself to sleep, poor guy." Liv had to stifle the tears that rushed to her eyes.
"He didn't aggravate his asthma did he?" She asked wiping tears.
"No, thank god. But don't worry, I've got his medicine in case he does."
"Yeah..." She couldn't hold back her tears.
"Liv don't cry, he'll be fine! I promise."
"I know, I'm sorry, I'm just really hormonal these days. Uh when he wakes up, if you think it would be a good idea can you call and put him on the phone? If not I'll just see you later."
"Sure."
"Thanks Lucy." She hung up the phone and wiped her eyes again just as someone was knocking. "Come in."
"Hey, just wanted to see how you're doin." Fin said as he came in and closed the door.
"I'm nauseous and my hormones are going crazy!" She said. "And my clothes don't fit!" She said crying.
"You okay?" He asked handing her two tissues.
"Thank you..." She wiped her eyes and blew her nose. "You never saw this."
"Saw what?" He smiled and she mimicked him.
"So I have to find a number two" She said seemingly unfazed now, tears all dry.
"For what?"
"1PP wants a Lieutenant for this place so guess who has to take the test or deal with someone else coming in to run this place."
"You"
"Bingo"
"And you said you needed a number two"
"I was hoping I could convince you to do it"
"Liv..."
"Fin, you're the only one I trust and if you won't do it it'll be Holmes and I want it to be you. Don't make me beg."
"Baby girl you know how I feel about this, it's too much trouble!" She sat at her desk looking at him. "You ain't gon take no for an answer are you?"
"No"
"Alright, I'll think about it." He said as he turned to leave.
.
Later that day Olivia was sitting on Carisi's desk eating French fries while he was talking to her about a case.
"So far we know that we have rapes in these areas, all our victims gave us the same report: male, mid 20's, white and he's got a scar on his right hand but we don't have no facial ID since in all 5 incidences, he grabbed them from behind." He said.
"So in reality, we don't really have a clue who we're looking for." Olivia said munching.
"Well no, but, one of the vics did say she saw his stomach when he was pulling up his pants and he has a large mole on his stomach.
"A mole?"
"Yeah..."
"Talk to the victims again, see if there's anything else they remember. His voice, his scent, anything that'll help us catch him."
"On it boss."
"And take Lopez with you. He's good at details" she said and headed back to her office when she saw Amanda come in from lunch.
"Rollins, can I see you in my office?" Amanda looked around the squad room before she followed Olivia.
... ... ...
"Shut the door please" Olivia asked. Rollins was a little scared but did so anyway and came into the office.
"You wanna see me?" Amanda said apprehensively.
"Yeah, have a seat." Olivia gestured to the sofa and chairs off to the side. Amanda nervously sat in one of the chairs and Olivia, after pulling her jacket, took a seat directly in front of her on the couch. There was a long moment of silence that passed between them when finally Olivia spoke.
"I um... Amanda, I've been meaning to talk to you, I um..." She blew out a deep breath.
"Take your time" Although she had a feeling what it was. She knew that Liv had been fucking Nick for months even though neither of them ever admitted to it and while she held no ill will toward either of them, she felt like it was a slap in the face that they were all in the same workplace, considered themselves friends and no one could just tell her the truth.
"Amanda;" Here came the tears again and Olivia silently cursed them as she blinked them back and tried her damnedest not to cry them but it was no use. They were determined to impede on that moment. "I'm sorry, give me a second." She said as she reached for the tissues.
"Are you alright?" Amanda was a bit taken by surprise with the tears and wondered if maybe it wasn't about she and Nick.
"Yeah... I'm just so hormonal, I can't control it. I'm sorry." She said crying as she wiped her tears but they just kept coming.
"Hormonal?"
"I'm pregnant! Nick and I - we...I don't even know how it happened but it..."
"Liv it's okay. I already knew about the two of you, it's kind of hard to hide."
"So everybody?" She asked still in tears. "God will this crying stop already?"
"No I mean hard to hide from me I just...I noticed and I want you to know that I'm okay with it but if I'm being honest I wish you'd told me sooner.
"And you're right I just didn't know how. I've never been in this situation before and when it started to get serious..." She wiped her eyes. "If it's any consolation, Nick wanted to tell you but I was the one that wanted more time." She said, her tears stopped.
"A baby huh?"
"Almost 4 months"
"Congratulations, and I really mean that. To be honest I always knew you were the one."
"The one?"
"Yeah I mean, Nick's a great guy but he's been in love with you for as long as any of us can remember and he and me, we didn't have... That. I'm happy for you."
"Thank you." Her tears started up again. "Dammit!" She said reaching for the tissues and they laughed.
"I'm gonna leave and let you straighten this out. Congrats again, you really deserve it." She said and walked out leaving Liv crying on the sofa.
"We're gonna have to talk about this crying business, it is not a good look for me!" Olivia said to her baby as she rubbed her stomach. "Let's go see if there are any donuts."
.
At the end of the day there were a few detectives left in the place and Liv was exhausted and heading home as she gathered up her things.
"You excited that Noah's adoption is a week away?" Fin said.
"I'm afraid to feel anything until it happens." Olivia laughed then yawned. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Need a ride?"
"Oh, could you? I don't have the energy to hail a cab."
"Sure thing. Just lemme..." He reached and turned off his computer. "Alright, let's roll."
... ... ...
As they were exiting the building and crossed the street into the parking lot, neither of them saw it coming; saw him coming, the short white guy with the mullet. They had dealt with this guy in the past, served 7 years for a rape charge and he vowed that once he got out he would make Elliot and Olivia pay. Well, just released from jail a week ago, he got his hands on a gun and came to pay his favorite detectives a visit. The thing was, Elliot was no longer around much to his dissatisfaction but hey, half of one was better than none and it was with this that he called to Olivia.
"Detective Benson!" She turned around to look at the person calling her name, but didn't immediately recognize him.
"Do I know you" Now Fin, ever protective, was looking and coming closer.
"Don't worry about it!"
"Liv, he's got a gun!" Fin said and like a movie,Fin pulled out and shot the guy once in the head but it was already too late. Lying by the car with tears in her eyes he saw Olivia and rushed over to her along with the other cops who came running from the precinct.
"Liv... Liv hold on baby!" He said as he held her in his arms. "CALL A BUS!" He screamed as she tried to speak.
"Fin..." She said weakly and passed out. There was blood covering her shirt and growing faster by the minute. Fin immediately tore open her blouse to inspect the damage and gasped when he saw the bleeding wound in her side and several officers rushed over to him.
"Get an ambulance...hurry." He cried as he pressed against the wound. "Just hold on baby girl!"
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Now we know what Noah's dreams were all about. Let's hope she makes it! I would love it if you'd leave a review.