.Chapter 16 - They're The Bad Guys And We're The Good People.
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Song: Save My Soul - Rivvrs | Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran
Spoiler: Celton moments ahead! ;) Please gimme bootiful inline comments to read :D
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(Unedited)
"I must say, it was very generous of you to invite your friend over to stay at our place," Mom beams at Cameron who just nods with a smile.
My eyes lift up automatically and Colton and I share a knowing look, before I concentrate on my lasagna again.
My heart flutters a little as I realize how cute it was, our exchange thing.
Believe it or not, Mom and Dad both know about Colton's position with his family. And also about his chronic insomnia.
As I have read it off the internet - don't judge me, I was just trying to increase my knowledge - insomnia is of two types: acute and chronic.
While acute insomnia lasts for a short period, a few days or a week to the most, chronic insomnia lasts for a much longer period. Colton having chronic insomnia is quite understandable, or rather, it fits into the picture, because it occurs due to stress or depression.
And I perfectly understand how Colton feels about his brother - it's the exact same way I feel about Bethany. So I can imagine what he must be going through...
The stress of constantly being told that you are second best; or rather, unwanted. The feeling of being shrugged off is horrible and those could be one of the reasons for his insomnia.
Acute insomniacs don't need treatment; chronic insomniacs do. They regularly need to see a therapist to check in on their behavioural patterns.
After reading all this information, I finally realized one thing - not only did Colton smoke to seek a little bit attention, but also because it relieved him off the stress.
But when I look at him, I wonder why I don't do the things he does: why don't I feel the need to make myself be seen, heard or taken into account.
I'm a pushover...
Colton was right. He was absolutely right when he told me that I was a pushover. I just let people stomp on me; I do nothing about it. But he? He has that fire inside him. He wants to show others that he is something: he's worth it.
As I look at Colton quietly eating his food, I feel a rush of admiration for him; he's so breathtaking, it hurts.
"It's a good thing that you came here," Mom's voice interrupts my thoughts, "Cameron and Ella will take good care of you."
"Thank you, Ma'am," Colton smiles a little at her and my eyes snap up to look at him in surprise.
Colton? Being so nice and polite? That's new, isn't it?
"Ah, the house seems so quiet now that Bethany has gone off to college, hasn't it?" Mom sighs, her shoulders visibly dropping down. Before anyone can say anything to her, Cam gets up suddenly, an angry look on his face.
"Mom! What is your problem?! Will you stop talking about Bethany for once? You have other kids too, you know!"
"Cameron, that's not the way you speak to your mother," Dad says in a warning tone, but it renders Cam unaffected. "Calm down."
"You know what? I'm out of here," Cam snaps, getting up from his seat and looking at me. "I pity you, Ella. How can you keep up with them?"
"Dude, just sit down-" Colton begins helplessly and I'm on the verge of tears. I don't know what to feel - happy that Cam stuck up for me openly for the first time, or sad that my own brother pities me.
"No!" Cam growls and leaves the table with a livid look on his face. The tension in the air is palpable and I've totally lost my appetite.
"I-I'll go to my room," I stutter, trying to blink back tears, but my eyes betray me. A single tear drops down my cheek and I shiver a little upon its impact on my arm.
"Ella..." my Mom trails off, looking totally lost, but I'm already out of the room.
My guts tell me to go after my brother and cool his anger down, but the disappointment in myself grows like a pit in my stomach; my vision is blurry as I almost run to my room. Closing the door behind me, I sink down to the floor, my back against the wood as I take support.
How could one dinner night turn so bad?
And especially the one when we had a guest over?
What is wrong with me? Why can't I be like Colton? Why can't I just show them that I am something, too?
The pit in my stomach grows, but neither the tears nor the continuously growing hatred for myself seem to stop.
I truly despise myself this moment: I wish I could hurt myself just for fun. Maybe pierce in a place where it hurts the most. How fun would that be?
But I know I'm not strong enough to do that.
Getting up from my sitting position, I drag myself to my bed and slip under the covers, cocooning myself in my blankets for security.
Why didn't I just have a person who loved me, so that he could come here and make me feel better? He would hug me and everything would be better.
The more I think of such a person, the more it makes me cry; the tears streak down my face and onto the pillow silently. Not a sound escapes my lips as I whimper by myself: my eyes are closed, trying to block the tears, but nothing stops them.
A few minutes later, there comes a knock on the door.
"Go away," I mumble weakly, figuring it is Cam, probably coming in to apologize. But I am in a really bad state of mind; if I even hear the word 'sorry' coming out of his mouth, I'd break down.
I sense a person come in and close the door of my room behind them. My face is thankfully facing the wall, so if it is Cam, he can't directly see my face, and nor I his.
Slowly turning around and wiping my face to get rid of tear stains, the very sight of Colton immediately breaks down the very little resolve that I have.
My breath gets caught in my throat as I almost choke on my tears, trying to hide my face from him.
But the next moment, I'm immediately engulfed in a tight hug from behind, my shoulders still shaking under his hold.
"Shh... shh... it's okay, Ella," he mutters in my ear but I shake my head. Even in my mental state, I feel my face heat up and a warm feeling passes in my chest. My eyes automatically close shut as more tears fall down slowly, making me feel so weak and pathetic.
"They're the bad guys," Colton says softly, hugging me and I nod, my lip quivering; so many emotions bursting inside me. "They're the bad guys and we're the good people. You're good. Don't listen to them, okay?"
"Okay," I whisper and he continues to hug me from the back. I feel so safe in his arms that I wish we could stay like that forever.
"You're okay," he says gently.
My heart pounds in my chest as I realize that he's still hugging me: the feeling's so exhilarating and yet so indescribable.
But then everything shatters as I remember Cam's words.
I pity you, Ella...
And that's all it takes to make my eyes sting at the corners again.
"Cam, h-he..." I begin, trying to get out of Colton's grip around me, turning to face him. "He's angry with me, isn't he? He-He said he pities me, Colton, I..."
I can't take it anymore.
Moving forward, I throw my arms around his neck, lunging forward to gain his warmth. His hands immediately wrap themselves around my waist and my waist feels so tiny when they're surrounded by his big hands.
"I don't want to do this anymore," I say, hicupping slightly. I hate how I sound, but I don't have the energy to keep correcting myself. "I want to s-show them."
"Yes, we will, Ella," Colton mumbles, his cheeks brushing again my hair.
I absolutely love the feeling of how I feel when I'm around him. I feel so... so secure even though it's only for a while since he's been behaving nicely with me.
But I love it.
A minute of silence passes by, with both of us in each others' arms and then slowly, I detach myself from him, my hair falling in front like a curtain. My face is mere inches away from him.
"Thank you," I say in a low voice, smiling shyly.
"You needed it," he smiles back. I needed him. Seeing him smile sends my heart into overdrive.
Don't you just love it when someone who smiles so less does it in front of you?
"Will you... um, will you check up on Cam for me?" I ask timidly, looking down at my hands and then back at him.
"Of course. I'll be right back."
My eyes follow him as he starts to walk out of my room, pausing at the doorway to look at me, and then finally goes out.
A big smile forms on my face, my heart missing the brooding rebel already. And that explains only one thing.
I may or may not be having a major crush on Colton.
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Hey! I missed you guys THIS much! I really bore you with these long ass author's notes don't I? -.- I apologize for it!
So, first off, now that my classes are bombarding me with so much work, I'm gonna set an update schedule which I'll try to stick to :P
CRAM updates on Saturday, like this one.
SBU updates on Tuesday or Friday. Either days.
Second off, you guys are SO amazing, CRAM needs three sweet votes and then it has 1 freaking K votes!!! :O Like, OMG!
Thank you!
How was the chapter?
Did you guys enjoy Celton? Well, I'm sure you did, but just askin' XD Ya or nah...? Or do you still ship Drake and Ella? #Drella? Comment who you ship! Drella or Celton?
What did you think about Cam's outburst? Do you think he overreacted?
Aw don't say anything bad bout my baby. K?
And then what about Ella's crush? Was Colton coming after her too predictable? I know it kinda might be, but let the poor girl be hugged by her crush, yeah? :D
Do I talk too much in the a/n? :/ You can comment anytime and tell me. I'll really shut up. I can be a handful sometimes x)
Goals: 36 votes. Vote up guys! A small orange click never hurt anyone, did it? Only brought big smiles on their faces :)
(Just like mine)
Teaser: tbh, idk what happens next :P So y'all will come to know next Sat!
Okay, so does anyone of you actually listen to the songs I add inbetween sentences? I know, I do, lol!
Until next time, which is probs a 'Spaces Between Us' update.
Byeee!
-Crazy